Autumn Dawn (#2.5, Witchling Saga)

by Lizzy Ford

  You’re not strong enough to resist it for long, Bartholomew-the-Terrible told him. One of the many souls of his predecessors that Decker inherited upon taking over the position of the Master of Dark, Bartholomew’s history for slaughtering Light and Dark Witchlings – as well as humans – almost became Decker’s fate.

  Almost. He understood now how following that fate would destroy all those he loved. He’d die before he let the Darkness consume him again. He’d die before he gave up this time.

  “Nataniel,” Decker whispered. “You’ve been so quiet.”

  He waited for the first – and allegedly the strongest – of his predecessors to respond. Nataniel the Darkbringer was responsible for reining in the Darkness a thousand years before, when it threatened to destroy the world.

  Nataniel didn’t answer. Decker never felt so alone.

  He wiped his face and left the bathroom. He pulled on jeans, sweater and heavy boots. A glance out his window revealed the branches of pine trees sagging under the weight of pristine snow. Grabbing a jacket, he walked downstairs and into the kitchen. He didn’t remember the last time he ate; his body was weak and his stomach roaring at the scent of Grandpa Louis’s cooking.

  He registered the voices outside his head and paused in the doorway of the kitchen. At any moment, his family would throw out the… thing that almost killed his twin and did kill so many innocent Light witchlings.

  “Breakfast?” Grandpa Louis asked, looking up from the breakfast table.

  He sat with Decker’s father drinking coffee. Grandpa Louis read a newspaper while Michael Turner held an iPad in front of him. The normalcy of the scene was almost surreal to Decker’s battered mind. Wasn’t there something more important than coffee and crepes?

  “Have a seat, son,” his father said. It sounded like a request, but Decker read his father’s expression and knew otherwise.

  The last time Decker sat with the two of them here, he was tormented by the sight of the empty third chair. It was where Summer would sit, if she were alive. Now, it was Autumn’s chair, if she still wanted anything to do with him. If he was able to manage the guilt he experienced at the idea of being with Autumn.

  Summer is gone. Autumn is not. The words were spoken to Decker by his grandfather, and he found himself repeating them whenever he grew too uncertain.

  Decker’s hands rested on the chair’s back for a brief moment before he sat down with his family. His father and grandfather, husbands to two generations of Dark Mistresses, radiated calming energy that worked its way into Decker’s body. The voices in his head quieted without silencing. It was enough to aid him in focusing on the outside world.

  “I made crepes,” Grandpa Louis said.

  “Yeah, that’d be great,” Decker said. “Thanks.”

  Grandpa Louis crossed to the stove. Decker waited for his father to say something, anything, about what he’d almost done. Michael glowed with Light and strength. Decker felt dirty around him.

  As if feeling his gaze, his father looked up from his iPad. A trace of a smile crossed his face, the unexpected warmth softening his expression.

  “How are you not angry at me right now?” Decker asked in frustration. He hated himself. How did his family not feel the same?

  “I’m proud of you.”

  “You’re crazy, dad.”

  “We all survived, and you came back from the Darkness,” Michael said with his characteristic rationale. “Having been married to your mother for over twenty years, I can tell you that’s a good day.”

  Decker was so startled, he almost laughed. Grandpa Louis set down a plate of his famous huckleberry crepes – complete with a smiley face drawn with whipped cream – in front of Decker. He toyed with the fork, afraid to ask after his twin.

  “Everyone did survive, right?” he asked cautiously. “Beck? Autumn? I didn’t kill them?”

  “Beck is asleep upstairs. He spent a couple days in the hospital, probably because of the blonde nurse that caught his eye. He knows he can heal himself,” Michael said. “Autumn is still there. Beck took care of her injuries, but she needs rest.”

  “Is she okay?”

  “Yes.”

  “Beck’s baby?” Decker asked, bracing himself to hear the worst.

  “She and her mother are physically healthy. Beck fixed them, too.”

  Decker was thoughtful for a moment. “What happens to the baby, now that Dawn is Dark?”

  “One of your cousins on my side went through something similar. His mother went Dark while she was pregnant,” Michael replied. “It affects the baby. It’s almost like they end up stuck between Light and Dark, until they’re of an age to choose. Your mother might understand better.”

  “I think I’d kill Mother if I saw her right now,” Decker mumbled.

  “Son.”

  “Well, Dad, I’m not the only one who almost killed –“

  “Decker!” Michael’s voice was quiet, but sharp. He glanced at Grandpa Louis, a quick reminder that Grandpa Louis still believed one of his daughters, Nora, the Mistress of Light, was missing, not dead. Decker’s family never revealed the truth to him that Rania killed her sister shortly after she assumed the title of Mistress of Dark.

  Decker clamped his mouth closed and dug into his food. He ate around the smiley face. It was a reminder of the man at the table not knowing how bad things were.

  “You really think I don’t know?” Grandpa Louis asked after a pause.

  Decker and his father froze.

  “Really, Michael?”

  Michael cleared his throat and straightened in his chair.

  Decker had never seen his father uncomfortable before. He looked between the two. Grandpa Louis was gazing disapprovingly at Michael, the same way Michael did Decker when he ran his motorcycle into the cliff.

  “One less family secret to keep,” Decker said to fill the awkward silence.

  “Rania told me years ago. I wasn’t aware the boys knew,” Grandpa Louis said. “I didn’t want to worry them.”

  “I really don’t know how this family functions,” Decker said.

  “One day at a time,” Grandpa Louis and Michael replied simultaneously.

  Decker snorted and fell quiet. It was the motto of the men and women stuck with spouses who served the Dark. Autumn had told him the same thing in the clearing. He recalled the pain on her face with anger and shame. She exhausted her magick in a last ditch effort to save him from the Darkness. Decker didn’t know how he was going to face her without taking the final step that would bury Summer’s memory for good. He wanted to claim the blonde girl the same way he had Summer.

  He hated himself for this, too, but his heart pulled him with such force, he wasn’t going to resist. Not when she’d risked everything to save him and Beck. He was going to take her hand and walk down the path to their fates together.

  Summer is gone. Autumn is not. Staring at the smiley face on his crepes, he made the decision to take his second chance with Autumn.

  “How long was I asleep?” he asked, aware of the lingering tension between his father and grandfather.

  “Three days,” Michael answered.

  “Three?” Decker repeated. “No wonder I almost feel decent.”

  “You will feel even better after some tea,” Grandpa Louis said and poured steaming water into the teacup beside Decker’s plate.

  Overwhelmed by his grandfather’s kindness and his father’s reserved warmth, Decker resisted the urge to run and hide in a cave in the forest, where he belonged. He wasn’t certain how they ate breakfast with him when he was barely able to tolerate himself. The things he’d done, the pain he put his family through… he deserved to be thrown out into the cold, alone.

  He felt his twin’s Light magick before Beck stepped out of the stairwell to the main floor of the cabin. Decker wolfed his food down, aware of how far apart he and Beck were after having been best friends for their first eighteen years.

  “Save me any?” Beck’s voice was gravelly from sleep. />
  “Of course,” Grandpa Louis replied and rose once more.

  “Mornin’, Beck,” Michael said, standing. “Grandpa Louis and I need to have a chat, it seems. We’ll leave you boys to talk.”

  Beck grunted in response, dropping into the seat his father vacated. His dark hair was tousled, though he was dressed warmly to go out. Decker met his twin’s bright, blue eyes. Beck showed no signs of their fight the other night, aside from the cautious edge in his gaze.

  “A very long chat,” Grandpa Louis said sternly.

  Red crept up Michael’s face. Beck glanced questioningly at Decker, who just shrugged. The Masters of Dark and Light said nothing as they studied one another.

  “There are more under the heat lamp,” Grandpa Louis said. He placed a plate full of crepes before Beck then scooped more onto Decker’s plate.

  The brothers lifted their forks to eat.

  “I’m not done yet,” Grandpa Louis told them. He retreated to the fridge and pulled out a can of whipped cream, returning to the table to draw smiley faces on their crepes.

  “Like we’re five,” Beck complained with a grin. “What? No cookies?”

  “Not for breakfast, young man.”

  Decker chuckled at his twin’s theatric response. Beck clutched his heart as if wounded. Grandpa Louis ignored him and left the kitchen, tea in hand.

  A tense silence filled the kitchen. The brothers focused on their food. Magick crackled, the opposition between Light and Dark creating a natural tug of war in the air around the twins as they sat eating.

  “I need to teach you to fight,” Decker said at last. “You hit like a girl.”

  “From what I heard, a girl kicked your ass.”

  They stared at each other, silently assessing. Beck’s magick prodded Decker. His push back was far less gentle. His dominant elements – fire and water – were never subtle. Beck didn’t flinch or back down like he might have a few weeks before, and Decker realized how far his twin had come in a short time.

  “Glad you’re back,” Beck said. “You plan on sticking around this time?”

  “It’s not that easy,” Decker said. He grappled with the words. “You do need to learn to fight. I can’t guarantee that I can defeat the Darkness. Next time, you may have to kill me.”

  “I know the horrible things you did weren’t you,” Beck replied.

  “The Darkness is a part of me. I may not have wanted to do those things, but I did. I killed Light witchlings. I would’ve killed you and Autumn,” Decker said in a tight voice, disturbed by the memory. “Beck, if I slide again, you need to be able to stop me.”

  “I know that now. I’m learning,” Beck said quietly. “But I also think it won’t come to that. You aren’t alone this time. You have me, and you have your girl.” Beck’s unwavering confidence floored Decker.

  “You’re crazy to believe in me, and she’s crazy if she wants anything to do with me.”

  “Whatever,” Beck said with a snort. “I’ll show you something cool after breakfast. Besides” his tone lightened “I’m finally learning how to create Light. I’ll be able to make up for Nora being dead all these years.”

  “You know about Nora,” Decker said. “You know about the sacred ground at the school?”

  “I’ve gotta figure out how to fix it, but yes, I know,” Beck said. “Figures you knew first.”

  “I’m four minutes older. I always know first.”

  “But I know something you don’t,” Beck said with triumph. “An epic secret that will blow you away.”

  “Whatever.” Decker shook his head at his melodramatic twin, doubting anything Beck wanted to tell him would rival what he’d learned the past few months about the depths of Dark power he contained.

  “I do, Decker,” Beck insisted. Unlike Decker’s brooding nature, Beck was light-hearted. His excitement at having a secret made his eyes sparkle.

  “Okay. We’ll see.”

  They finished eating in silence. Decker studied his brother, a sense of loss deep within him. Beck survived, but they’d never be as close as they were. They couldn’t be. He’d lost his best friend when they assumed their hereditary titles, when he crossed the line and killed those he shouldn’t have. Beck was right; the Darkness forced Decker to do things he didn’t think he’d ever do.

  But he still did them, because he refused to fight the Darkness. Instead, he fed the Darkness until it was hungry and strong enough to destroy all of them. He put his brother in the winless position of defending Light against a ruthless and much more skilled power.

  He was saddened to know the chasm that formed between them was his fault, but also grudgingly proud of his brother. Beck stepped up when it counted. In time, Beck would learn his magick well enough to become a true counterbalance to Decker’s Dark magick.

  If they had time. Decker winced at the noise in his head. He wasn’t going down without a fight this round. He’d do whatever it took to fend off the Darkness and protect those he cared about. He’d become the enforcer he was supposed to be. He would learn how to cage the Dark and undo the damage he and his mother did.

  It was the least he could do for Summer, Autumn and his family.

  “We have to talk business for a minute,” Beck said, taking a deep breath.

  At the troubled note in his twin’s voice, Decker set his utensils down and leaned back. He knew he had a lot coming to him.

  “No more killing Light witchlings,” Beck started.

  “I won’t. As long as I don’t slide, I promise you, I won’t,” Decker said. “I can’t undo what I did, though.”

  “No more drugs.”

  “What are you? Dad?” Decker snapped.

  “My job as your brother and the Master of Light is to protect you from you!” Beck retorted. “You kinda owe me, Decker, or did you forget you tried to kill me a few nights ago?”

  Decker rolled his eyes. “Fine. No more drugs.”

  “Finally, and no more sleeping around.”

  “What?”

  “I mean, aside from your girlfriend.”

  “This coming from the guy who knocked up that psycho? Didn’t Dad say you stayed in the hospital so you could flirt with some girl?” Decker growled. “Killing and drugs, fine. But I don’t know if I even have a girlfriend.”

  “Okay, how about, if you have a girlfriend, no sleeping around on her,” Beck said, considering.

  “Easy. I’d never sleep around on my girlfriend. That’s all you get, Beck.”

  “I’m happy with that,” his twin said.

  Decker was quiet for a moment, wanting to wring his brother’s neck already. He understood why Beck guilt-tripped him into the promises. However, Beck had no idea what it was like to try to handle the Darkness and the insanity of Decker’s mind without some sort of distraction or something to numb it. If Autumn chose not to be with him, he’d have nothing to buffer the pain.

  “I need you to make me a promise, Beck,” he said. “Swear to me, if I ever start to slip, you’ll protect Autumn, whether or not she wants anything to do with me.”

  “You know I will.” Beck glanced up. “It’s my duty, Decker.”

  “This is more than a duty,” Decker replied. “I’m serious. I want you to promise me you’ll do whatever it takes.”

  “Like trade my soul?” Beck asked with a pointed look Decker wasn’t able to interpret.

  “I was thinking more along the lines of killing me or taking her away from danger,” Decker said. “The world needs your Light.”

  “I promise, Decker.” Beck said and grinned.

  Decker eyed him, wondering if his brother had heard anything he said.

  “Now onto the world’s most epic secret. You won’t find this funny, but I will.” Beck rose. “Ready?”

  Decker stood warily as Beck’s white fog unleashed in the kitchen. Beck held out his hand, saying,

  “Trust me.”

  Decker took his brother’s hand. The fog swept around him, making his dark shadows churn uneasily. A few se
conds later, the cloud cleared to reveal the bright white hallway of a hospital. The amount of souls in pain ratcheted up the noise in Decker’s head. His chest tightened at the idea of seeing Autumn. Both anxious and uncertain, he stretched out his senses to find her among the voices of the souls in the hospital. As usual, he was unable to find her, because her soul sang with neither Light nor Dark.

  Beck started down the quiet hallway to a busier one. The twins drew looks from everyone they passed. Decker ignored everyone, while Beck smiled in return and offered by-name greetings to those he’d met during his stay.

  “Hey, gorgeous,” he said, pausing beside an elderly woman taking baby steps down the hallway. “Can I escort you to your room?”

  Decker rolled his eyes. His brother, always the charmer. Too anxious to wait, Decker sensed his mother’s Darkness and continued down the hallway. His instincts identified which patient room she was in. Curious as to why she was there, he reached the room and entered. The lights were off, and it took a moment for his eyes to adjust from the brightness of an open window, to the relative dark of the rest of the room.

  His mother sat next to a hospital bed. Decker’s eyes fell to Autumn. She was deep asleep, her breathing slow and steady. Heart pounding fast, he crossed to her. Her slight frame, pale skin and blonde hair rendered her appearance vulnerable. He stared at her, astonished someone that small and delicate was all that kept him from losing his mind and killing his own brother. How was she so strong, when he was so… weak?

  “Did Beck come with you?” his mother asked.

  “Yeah,” Decker said. “She’s okay, right?”

  “She’s fine. They gave her a sleep aid last night.”

  “What are you doing here?” he asked.

  “Redeeming myself, in what small ways I can.”

  He faced her. Her voice was hushed. Dressed in dark clothing as usual, she appeared ageless, yet sad. They gazed at each other, understanding the other’s pain. Decker didn’t want her there, so close to his Autumn. His mother’s Darkness had caused too much pain already.