Faith held Cain’s hand tightly when he paused and shuddered, his eyes tightly closed as he seemed to relive those moments.
“I took out three of them,” he confided harshly. “I’m a doctor and I took down three men like their lives didn’t mean a thing. I wanted to kill every single one of them. I would have if I could have, too.”
“You were defending yourself!” Faith exclaimed, pressing against him as she tried to take some of his pain. “You did what you had to do to save your life and the lives of…”
“Nobody else lived, Faith. By the time choppers flew over to give us cover fire, those kids were all down. Ground forces arrived and got me out of the Humvee, but all the rest…” Cain’s voice cracked as he gasped for breath. “There were six of them. Six kids who never got to go home again. And me? The doctor that could have saved them all if I hadn’t been wedged into a steel box? I got out with a few beauty marks.”
Faith thought the angry puckered scars crisscrossing one arm and the side of his neck and face were far more serious than that, but she kept her peace. She knew it was his turn to exorcise his demons now, but she couldn’t just sit there while he was hurting and say nothing at all. “Cain, you did everything you could over there. You did the best you could under horrible circumstances. That’s all anybody has the right to ask of you,” she offered softly, lifting a hand to stroke his marred jaw. “You are not responsible for the sins of the world. That is not your cross to bear.”
Breathing hard, Cain shook his head furiously. “I took an oath to do no harm, Faith. Between the lives I couldn’t save and the lives I took, I came back from the war zone a completely different person. All I wanted to do when I got back was crawl in a hole with as much liquor as I could stomach and lick my wounds. I hated the world. I was selfish and self-absorbed. I couldn’t see past my own pain.”
“Considering everything you’d seen and been through, I think that’s a pretty understandable reaction,” Faith acknowledged softly. Yes, his actions had hurt her. They’d devastated her. But knowing the origin of it, she realized that it wasn’t something that she couldn’t forgive him for doing. Staring in his turbulent eyes, she could still see the man she loved. “You said that you’re getting help,” she whispered, brushing the back of her fingers over his scarred cheek. “That’s a big step in the right direction.” Faith watched his strong throat work as he swallowed and nodded.
“Yeah,” he conceded. “It hasn’t been easy talking about it, but I knew it was necessary. When I got home, I tried to drown those memories with beer and vodka. Hell, with whatever I had handy. It didn’t work. Every time I closed my eyes, it was all there, burned in my mind. Then, the night of the bar brawl, Abel came into my apartment, yelling and screaming that you’d been hurt. He warned me that if I didn’t pull myself together, I was going to lose any chance I might have had with you. Honestly, he scared the hell out of me. I went to your place that night.”
“You did?” Faith questioned weakly.
“Yeah, I sat outside your window until the sun came up. I just needed to be close to you. My mind went through every single bad thing that could have happened to you. I just kept playing it over and over in my mind. It scared the shit out of me. I decided then and there that I wanted you more than I wanted my misery, but I guess the doctor in me recognized that I was gonna need professional help. I came home and found Dr. Albright’s number that morning. I called him after Honor showed up and reinforced everything I’d already decided. I gotta hand it to that girl,” he admitted with a tiny smile, “She can give a man a “Come to Jesus” moment better than anyone I’ve ever seen.”
“That’s Honor,” Faith agreed, returning his grin with a gentle smile of her own. “She looks out for all of us. And if you tell her I said this next part, I’ll deny it, but she generally seems to know what’s best for all of us.”
“As much as I value Honor’s opinion, right now, yours is the only one I care about, Faith,” Cain countered softly, holding her eyes captive with his. “I’ve told you everything, honey. I’ve come clean to the bone. There’s nothing I haven’t told you. It’s all in the open between us now. So, put me out of my misery and tell me, do I still have even the glimmer of a chance with you?” he asked, laying it all on the line.
“I love you,” Faith replied huskily, the words coming easily as she wiped away a tear. “Even when I was trying so hard to hate you, I loved you.”
“I love you, too, sweet Faith,” Cain returned hoarsely. “So much that it hurts, but that’s not an answer. Can you forgive me for being a coward?”
“You are not a coward!” Faith declared forcefully, her eyes flashing as she glared at him. “You were confused and hurt and angry. You’re not a coward. Don’t you ever say that again.”
Hopeful, Cain nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”
“And no more being ashamed of what you had to do over there, either. War is an awful, terrible experience. I understand that. People have to do things that they’d never normally do. Yes, you’re a doctor, but you were also a soldier. Sometimes soldiers have to kill. It’s part of the job. You’ve got to stop crucifying yourself for it.”
“Thank you, Dr. Albright,” Cain teased, his gaze lightening on her determined face.
“I probably could have saved you a lot of therapy fees if you’d just come to me when you got home,” Faith muttered under her breath, “But I’m glad you found help from someone. If he’s helping you see that what you had to do in Afghanistan was justifiable, I’ll kiss his feet myself. I won’t have our children thinking that you’re anything less than a hero for your service. Not even their father gets to confuse them about that.”
“Our children?” Cain repeated, latching onto those words she’d uttered like a lifeline as his body went hot. “Did you just say ‘our children’?”
“Well, we’ll start with one, but I had four sisters, Cain. I don’t think I’d know how to take care of just one child,” Faith replied, her lips curling into a serene smile as his arms enfolded her and tumbled her back against the pile of sleeping bags on the cooler floor. “Mmmmm,” she hummed as his hungry lips covered hers and his tongue thrust inside her mouth.
“I swear, I’ll be the best husband and father I can be, Faith,” he whispered between deep, reverent kisses. “Just say you forgive me, and I’ll spend the rest of my life proving I can be the kind of man you deserve.”
Pulling her lips from his, Faith stared up into his solemn gaze. “You are already the man I deserve. You always were, Cain. You just got lost for a little while, but you found your way home.”
“Can we make that official?” Cain asked deeply, shoving his hand into his pocket and pulling out the ring box he’d carried with him since Honor had returned it the day she’d arrived to blast Mohammed from the mountain.
Lifting her head, Faith’s gasped as his fingers deftly opened the crushed velvet box. “My ring,” she whispered. “You have it with you?”
“I always had it with me,” Cain mumbled, flushing guiltily as he pulled the diamond engagement ring out of the pillowed slot with shaking fingers. “It’s been burning a hole in my pocket for weeks. I want this back where it belongs,” he proposed deeply. “I love you, sweetheart. Marry me, Faith. Please, be my wife. This time, I promise nothing on Earth will tear me away from you. Not a war. Not my own fears and insecurities. Nothing will ever separate us again.” Groaning as he watched a fat tear drop slide from the corner of her eye, he winced. “Don’t cry, baby,” he begged. “It’s too soon, isn’t it? I’m sorry. I can wait,” he said quickly as he began to withdraw his hand.
Grabbing his wrist, Faith shook her head. “No! I just… I never thought I’d hear you say those things again. I want to marry you. I want you any way I can have you.”
Covering her mouth with his, he slid the gold band over her trembling finger before crushing her against his chest. “I’m sorry, Faith. I’m so, so sorry for everything,” he whispered, burying his against her sweet smelling neck as his own
tears fell against her throat.
“Shhhh,” Faith soothed, cupping the back of his head as she felt sobs rack his heavy body. “It’s over now. We’ll put it behind us, Cain. This is our fresh start together.” Wriggling beneath his heavy body until she could capture his lips, she consoled him with slow, gentle kisses, teasing his firm lips with her tongue until his mouth parted on a gasp. “Make love to me,” she breathed against the corner of his mouth. “Make us whole again, Cain.”
Cain’s Salvation - Chapter Twenty
Lifting his head as he drew in an unsteady breath, Cain stared into Faith’s luminous eyes. “Are you sure, baby? I don’t wanna rush you.” That much was true. He didn’t want to push her for things she couldn’t give him yet, but at the same time, he desperately wanted to prove she was his again in the most elemental way there was.
Hooking one leg behind his, Faith smiled. “Sometimes rushing can be a really good thing,” she whispered, lifting her head to nip his chin as she rolled her hips against his pelvis. Her body craved his and her pussy throbbed in anticipation. “The way I remember it, you do rushed really, really well,” she murmured seductively, dragging her teeth against the thick vein in his neck as she tried to coax him into losing control. She loved when Cain was wild and feral in his loving almost as much as she adored when he took his time and worshipped her body like it was his favorite temple.
Growling as her talented lips suckled gently at his throbbing pulse, Cain felt his erection throb and flex against the fly of his jeans. “Maybe I need to refresh your memory on what slow and easy feels like, darlin’,” he admonished, pushing his burgeoning cock against her mound and grinding his hips against hers. “In fact, I think I’m gonna take my time tonight and reacquaint myself with every part of this delicious body,” he breathed, sliding his hand from her neck to her breast and cupping the firm globe in his hand. Having the freedom to touch his woman again in all the ways he wanted was enough to make him lightheaded. Dipping his head, he captured her lips again for a deep, wet kiss, tangling their tongues together as he reminded himself that slow had been his idea.
Faith moaned as Cain brushed the tip of her breast back and forth through the thin cotton of her t-shirt. “Yes,” she urged, arching her back and pressing her breast more firmly into his hand. “Don’t stop, Cain,” she begged, relishing the wonderful friction of his cock rubbing her pussy through her jeans while his fingers tweaked her swollen nipple mercilessly through her shirt.
“Oh, I love that sound, Sweetness.” He lifted his mouth to smile down at her. “I’ve missed hearing how you cry out when I touch you.” He tugged at the stiff little bud of her breast again and pulled another low whimper from her damp lips. “I’m gonna enjoy making you scream tonight, love. Long and loud,” he promised darkly, nipping her full lower lip as she bucked underneath him.
Sliding her hand between them, Faith stroked the bulge in his jeans and smiled when her lover growled low in his throat. “I’m not the only one that gets loud,” she taunted, enjoying the way his face clenched and he hissed when she tightened her hand around him.
“Naughty witch,” he grumbled with a grin as he hauled her upright and pushed the bulky jacket she wore off her slim shoulders. “I need you naked and underneath me,” he muttered, gripping the bottom of her shirt and yanking it over her head.
“That sounds good since I want you naked and on top of me,” Faith agreed, quickly grabbing the bottom of his shirt and mimicking his actions as she pulled it over his head. They both shimmered as the cool temperature of their surroundings intruded on them. Chilled, Faith automatically moved into Cain’s strong arms.
Chafing her arms and back, Cain eased Faith back to the pallet. “You know, I appreciate the help our families gave us by locking us in here, but they couldn’t just have shoved us in the storeroom?” he complained, yanking one of the thick blankets over them to ward off some of the cold air.
Faith giggled as she worked his belt buckle loose beneath the covers. “They really didn’t think our whole reconciliation all the way through, did they?”
Yanking on the button and zipper of her jeans, Cain grinned. “Honestly, I think they half suspect they’ll find my frozen, lifeless corpse when they open that door. Things could have gone either way.”
“Won’t they be happily surprised then,” Faith laughed, lifting her hips so he could push her denim jeans over her hips and down her legs. She shivered against his big body as the blanket gapped when he rolled to shove his own jeans off. “Cain!” she squealed, clutching the edge of their blanket as she tried to keep the icy breeze off her skin. “You’re making it colder down here!”
Finally free of his restrictive clothing, Cain rolled toward her, hauling her tiny body against him. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ve got all kinds of interesting ideas on how to keep us warm. In fact, there are certain parts of me that are already overheated,” he murmured seductively against the swell of her breast as he rocked his cock against her smooth abdomen.
Faith’s pussy clenched and she felt her thighs grow moist with her juices as his words rumbled against her flesh. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she offered him a come hither smile. “Me, too,” she confided. “There’s a certain part of me that’s positively steaming.”
“Is that so?” he asked huskily, rubbing his lips against the soft skin of her breast as his fingers began a slow exploration of her body. “I’m gonna have to find that spot and warm myself up,” he whispered slowly surrounding her raspberry-tipped breast with his mouth while his hand wandered down her midriff, the muscles quivering under the weight of his palm.
Licking the ripe berry in his mouth, he bit her nipple gently as his hand finally slid between her milky thighs. Sliding two fingers through her creamy heat, he groaned. Slick with her own juices, she moaned as he used one finger to circle her clit, teasing the taut bud with his fingertip. “Oh, baby, you’re smoking hot down here,” he praised against her breast, moving his head to her twin peak and nibbled that ignored nipple with his teeth. “You’re warm and wet for me,” he breathed, tapping her clit with his thumb as he pierced her core with two fingers.
Every muscle in Faith’s body tightened as Cain’s mouth sucked lovingly at her nipples while his fingers fucked in and out of her pussy. Moaning, she bucked against his hand. “Cain, please,” she whimpered in a needy, tense voice. She loved the sensations he was creating, but she yearned for a harder, deeper connection.
Humming around her breast, Cain’s fingers curled and stroked the inner wall of her snug channel. Smiling as he felt her pussy suck greedily at his fingers, he scraped his teeth against the underside of her plump breast. “What do you want, baby?” he asked as his head disappeared beneath the blanket to press hot, damp kisses against her flushed belly before circling her belly button with his tongue. “Does this pussy want me to eat it like candy?” he asked huskily against her abdomen. “Do you want my tongue, Faith?”
He knew his woman. He understood that there was nothing she loved better than having him fuck her tight little pussy with his tongue while he played with her clit. Not that he minded – his Faith had the sweetest nectar on the face of the planet. He needed her taste on his lips the way an addict craved his next fix.
“Cain, yes!” Faith begged, digging her nails into his scalp as she felt his hot breath against her folds. The first slide of his tongue nearly electrified her, stunning her senses and stealing her breath. “Oh, fuck, yes,” she breathed as his firm lips drew her clit from beneath its hood. He flicked the sensitive bud with his tongue as he suckled, and she wondered if she’d live through the white hot pleasure. Lifting her hips against his mouth, she moaned deeply as he released her clit from between his lips only to quickly rim her entrance with his tongue. “C-Cain!” she whimpered as he breached her pussy with one hard thrust of his tongue.
“Shhhh,” he hushed her, nipping her clit and pulling a wanton cry from her throat. “I’ve got what you want, Sweetness,” he growled, as he lifted her body again
st his lips again. Her flavor flooded his tongue, heightening his desire and hardening his cock to the point of torture. “God, baby,” he moaned, licking her slick lips and pulling her cream into his mouth. “I can’t get enough of you.”
Faith clawed at the sleeping bag beneath her as Cain’s mouth worked over her pussy, nipping and sucking, robbing her of coherent thought. With every pass his tongue made over her clit, her body coiled tighter, poised to slip over the edge of passion into an incredible orgasm. Groaning deeply as Cain’s hands tightened on her ass and pressed her mound closer to his mouth, she tensed as his tongue tortured her, alternately fucking her needy body and flicking her throbbing clit. “CainCainCainCain!” she chanted, thrashing her head against the pallet as he drove her body toward a jagged peak. “I’m gonna cum!” she moaned as she felt her pussy contract around his tongue and her vision dimmed.
Growling as her slick syrup gushed, Cain lapped her pussy like a man dying of thirst, her essence sliding down his throat and fueling his desire. She tasted like heaven, coating his tongue and lips with her fruity juices. “Baby, yes,” he groaned as her hips jerked involuntarily.
Sobbing with the force of her orgasm, Faith gasped for breath as he soothed her with tiny little kitten licks to her pussy. “Mmmmm,” she hummed, stroking the back of his head as he turned his face to press soft, adoring kisses to the inside of her thigh. “I love you,” she breathed, tightening her fingers in his short hair and urging him back up her body.
When his mouth hovered above hers again, she licked her essence from his swollen lips and smiled when he groaned low in his throat. She could feel his throbbing erection pulsing against her stomach and instinctively knew the beast within him silently paced its cage. “I think it’s my turn to take care of you now,” she whispered against his neck before she kissed a path down his chest.
Wed by Wednesday (Passion in Paradise #4.5) Page 28
