“Family.”
Something soft brushes my forehead, and I blink my eyes open. Rex is in bed next to me, gliding his fingers through my hair. I run my hand over the smooth skin of his chest, reminding myself that he’s here. That I’m here.
I was only in the hospital overnight; the doctors let me come home yesterday. JJ and Erin fought with Rex over whose home I was going back to, but Rex wasn’t losing that battle.
I don’t know how I got so lucky.
Two amazing friends.
One awesome brother.
And Rex. There aren’t enough words for Rex.
“Why aren’t you mad?” I ask softly, drawing circles over his chest with the tip of my finger.
“What?” He shakes his head. “Baby, why would I be mad?”
“Because I kept something from you. After all the bullshit promises we made to be honest with each other, and after you told me about your father, I still kept this from you. I kept two things from you.”
“You were protecting yourself, Shae, and that’s a language I speak. I would never fault you for that. I wish you would’ve trusted me enough to tell me who you were, but I can understand how scared you must’ve been after finding out I was connected to the Salamanca family.”
I nod, his words pulling all the emotion from my body, wringing it clean. My lower lip trembles. “It’s not that I didn’t trust you,” I begin, the tears starting. “I wanted to. I wanted to tell you, but I was scared. For the last fourteen years, I’ve wondered if my life was in danger. I’ve wondered if the other families would come after me, and when you told me about your father, I freaked. I wanted to keep you close, I wanted you to prove to me that you weren’t a part of that life and that I could trust you with my darkest secrets, but until I was one-hundred-percent sure, I couldn’t take that chance. It could’ve cost me my life.”
Rex’s eyes are suspiciously glossy when he curls a hand around the back of my neck. “You don’t have to explain yourself, Shae. I understand.”
I nod, and he wipes away my tears.
“Do you remember that morning after Erin’s wedding?”
“Yes.”
“Do you remember what I said to you when you woke up from your nightmare?”
I nod, a fresh wave of tears forming. “You said you’ve been searching for me your entire life.”
“It’s true. I knew… When you cried out for Cami, everything fell into place for me. The age your parents died, you being adopted, some of the other things you would say in your sleep—it all clicked, and I knew that you were the girl who’d saved me all those years ago.”
“What? I didn’t save you, Rex. You saved me. You let me go.”
“No, baby. Trust me, you saved me. If it wasn’t for you, I would’ve followed in my father’s footsteps. But your act of kindness—offering me your inhaler—and the pain I saw in your eyes when you heard Cami scream, they stuck with me. I’ve carried those thoughts around with me every day, pulling them out when I needed a reminder of why I have to live a clean life. I wanted to be better for you. I wanted to make a good life in your name, because my family took so much away from you.”
“Rex.”
“So yes, I’ve been searching for you my entire life, and I’m not ever letting you go. I don’t care about our parents and what happened between them. That doesn’t touch us, got it?”
My chin quivers, my shattered heart slowly putting itself back together. “Got it.” My voice is thick, barely audible, but Rex hears me. He always hears me.
“You, Shae, stole a piece of my heart long before I was ready to give it away. But I’m ready now. You’re a part of my life. You’re my family, and I know I still have to prove myself, but believe me when I tell you that you can trust me with your life. My loyalty is with you, always with you. And no matter what happens, I need you to remember that.”
“This is what I wished for at the skating rink,” I confess. “I wished for us to make it through this mess. I knew my secrets, my life, would cause a whirlwind of disasters, but I wanted to keep you, Rex Ambrosi, so that’s what I wished for.”
“Shae.” Eyes full of emotion, he drops his forehead to mine. “I don’t know—”
“Shhh.” I press a finger to his lips, and he kisses the pad. “I wasn’t done talking.”
He blinks once, silently giving me the go-ahead, and I take a deep breath, because what I have to say is huge—life-alteringly huge.
“I love you, Rex.”
His eyes close as soon as the words pass my lips, and a tear falls down his cheek. I wipe it away.
“You don’t have to say it back; I just want you to know how I feel.”
“Say it again,” he whispers.
“I love you.” I sit up in bed, pulling him with me so I can cradle his face in my hands. “I love you, Rex Ambrosi. Only you. ”
Whether he says the words or not, I see them in his eyes. I feel them in his touch. I’m a part of him just as much as he’s a part of me.
He wraps his warm arms around me. “The past few days have been hell. When you hit your head and didn’t wake up…” He shakes his head as though he’s still trying to grasp everything that’s happened. “I didn’t know if you were okay, and that scared me to death because I love you too, and I was so afraid I’d never get the chance to tell you.”
“You love me?”
I’ve waited so long for someone other than a friend to say those three little words and mean them. I’ve prayed for this kind of love. This deep, soul-piercing, forever kind of love.
“So much,” he says, kissing away my tears.
“Say it again.”
His lips land on my cheek. “I love you. With everything I have and everything I am, I love you.” He kisses the tip of my nose and then my forehead. “You own every inch of my heart, Shae Black, and every piece of my soul.”
And then his lips find mine, and he shows me just how true those words are.
I love you.
One year later
The sound of a horn jolts me awake, and I blink heavily, finding my arms and legs wrapped around Rex like a pretzel. His breathing is slow and steady, and I push up on my elbow, taking a moment to watch him sleep.
Running my hand along his jaw, I smile, remembering the way his stubble felt brushing against my inner thighs. Everything about this man is perfect—from the tip of his jet black hair down to his toes—and a year later, I still find myself wondering what I did to deserve him.
Rex shifts in his sleep, and I pull my hand back, not wanting to wake him. Sliding out of bed, I tug his T-shirt over my head and slip out the patio door onto the balcony. The sun has set, leaving in its place a black velvet sky sprinkled with diamonds. A crescent moon hangs high, and the twinkling lights of the Eiffel Tower in the distance provide the most breathtaking backdrop. A breeze floats through the air, and I close my eyes, remembering how hard Rex and I have worked to get where we are.
Since that horrible night a year ago, our lives have been anything but easy. Uncle Giovanni showed up at the hospital, much to Rex’s dismay, and confirmed my suspicions. The Blacks owed him a favor, which is how they ended up with me. He also gave me the keys to a storage shed in Springfield that held all of my family’s personal belongings, including my birth certificate and Social Security card—everything I would need to resume my life as Bianca DiMarco. Which is something I decided against.
Our meeting was brief, but my uncle assured me I was safe and that he’d taken care of Sal’s body. Three days later there was a media shitstorm regarding the disappearance of Sal Ambrosi, and I did as Giovanni had asked: I didn’t seek answers or explanations, I simply went about my life the only way I knew how, one day at a time.
I wasn’t the only one moving forward one day at time. Once Isa knew her sons were safe, she told them about her cancer. It was rough on Rex and Dante, especially after everything that had happened, but we rallied around her, and we went to every doctor’s appointment and chemo treatment she had.
Isa is a strong, determined woman, so I wasn’t at all surprised when she kicked cancer’s ass. She still has a long road ahead of her, but she’s in remission, and that’s what we have to focus on.
As for Dante, we’re getting along great, but I’m worried about him. So is Rex. He always puts on a brave face, assuring us he’s fine, but how could he be after everything he’s gone through? He’s buried himself in work at Vault, and every time I try to talk to him about our father, he tells me he’s not ready.
I have to respect that. One of these days I hope he’ll be ready, and I’ll be here to tell him everything he wants to know. In the meantime, every Wednesday night we have dinner, just the two of us. We talk about our lives—carefully avoiding the topic of our parents—and we’ve slowly grown to love and trust each other.
I’ll never forgive Isa for sleeping with my father, but I can’t hate her for it either, because that indiscretion brought me Dante.
My life isn’t perfect, but it’s perfect for me. I’m honestly not sure it could get any better. A few months ago Josalyn gave me the full-time job I’d hoped for. And as for the untouched bank account, well, Rex and I certainly don’t need the money, so it remains untouched. At my uncle’s request, I put it aside for any future children I may have. He said my father would’ve been thrilled to know he’d contributed to future DiMarcos going to college. Their last name won’t be DiMarco, though.
“What’re you doing out here?” Rex asks just as his body presses against mine, his hands grasping the rail of our balcony as he cages me in.
“Enjoying the view.”
“You should’ve woken me up. We missed our dinner.”
“We can order room service.”
He hums. “Yes, we can.”
He drops his lips to the side of my neck, and I sigh. “I’m not ready to go home.”
“We’ll come back.”
I nod. “Someday.”
“Maybe for our honeymoon.”
My breath catches, and Rex smiles against my skin.
“Honeymoon?” Slowly, I turn in his arms.
He’s wearing nothing but a pair of faded jeans and a brilliant smile.
“Why are you smiling like that?”
“Because you’re beautiful, and I’m the luckiest man in the entire world.” He presses his lips to my forehead and drops to one knee.
Leave it to Rex to remind me that my life could, in fact, get better. It just did.
“Rex.” My throat grows tight. Too tight too talk.
He wraps my hands in his and stares up at me with unwavering love. “Shae Black, I have loved you since before I knew what love was, and I will love you long after I leave this Earth. You’ve already made me the happiest man in the world, and I want to spend the rest of my life making you the happiest woman in the world.”
“You already have.” I drop to my knees in front of him, my eyes swimming with tears.
He grins. “I’m not done, baby.”
“Sorry.” I wipe a stray tear from my face and tuck my hand back in his. “Please, continue.”
“I want to make love to you every night, wake up to your beautiful face every morning, and someday, when we’re ready, I want to have babies with you.”
“Lots of babies,” I whisper, my bottom lip trembling.
“As many as you want. But first, I need you to marry me.”
“Yes.” I nod, throwing myself in his arms. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”
Rex hauls me against him. Pushing to his feet, he spins us around and kisses the ever-loving daylights out of me. When we finally come up for air, he pulls a black velvet box from his pocket.
Slowly, he opens it to reveal an emerald-cut diamond, mounted on a diamond encrusted platinum band.
“It’s beautiful,” I whisper. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like it.”
Rex slides the ring on my finger. “Actually, you have.”
I pull my eyes from the ring that sits heavy on my left hand. “What do you mean?”
“That diamond was your mother’s.”
“What?” My lips part in shock. “How did you—”
“Giovanni had it. He gave it to me that night he came to the house, said you might want it.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t remember what it looked like.”
“I had the diamonds remounted. Her band wasn’t in the best shape, and since I plan on you wearing this for several decades, I figured I’d get it updated.”
Emotion strains my throat as I stare at the ring. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” he whispers, pulling me into his arms. “The look on your face is all I need.”
I squeeze him as tightly as I can. “I love you, Rex Ambrosi, more than I’ve ever loved another human being, and I can’t wait to be your wife.”
“Shae Ambrosi,” he whispers against my lips. “Has a nice ring to it.”
“I can’t wait.”
“What’ll it be tonight, Dante?” Rose asks, leaning against the bar. Her tits wink at me beneath her tight shirt, and all I’d have to do is reach up, pull one out, and suck. She wouldn’t stop me because that’s what this place is about.
Addiction is more than a sex club. It’s about taking what you want, indulging in your wildest fantasies—and for me, masking the pain. I’ve spent the last several months numbing myself one warm, tight pussy at a time.
“Scotch. Neat.”
Rose steps away, and I swivel around on my barstool, locking eyes with a leggy brunette—tight skirt, tighter blouse, and a mischievous gleam in her eye. She isn’t working; she’s here for pleasure, and she’s heading straight for me.
Relaxing in my chair, I drop my knees apart.
“Lacey,” she says, stopping in front of me with a sugary sweet smile.
“I’m not looking for pleasantries, Lacey. Not tonight. I’m not giving you my name, and I don’t give a fuck what yours is.”
My words are harsh, but it’s the truth. I always start with the truth because the last thing I need is a woman getting the wrong idea. Lucky for me, this one doesn’t seem deterred.
“Fair enough. If you’re not looking for pleasantries, what are you looking for?”
“Here’s your drink.” Rose slides my scotch across the bar, and I reach over my shoulder to grab it.
I swirl the amber liquid several times before bringing it to my lips and downing it in one shot. Lacey lifts an eyebrow. Setting the glass down, I pop the button of my jeans and the head of my cock peeks out. Lacey licks her lips, and I know we’re on the same page.
“On your knees.”
Squeezing her thighs together, she complies, dropping between my parted legs. Lowering my zipper, I free my cock and guide it between her willing lips.
She sucks me deep, her greedy mouth devouring my cock. Normally I’d thread my fingers through her hair, guide her the way I want her, set my own pace. But I don’t have to do that this time. Somehow, she knows exactly what I want.
Fast.
Wet.
Hard.
I brush a strand of hair from her face so I can watch her suck my cock, allowing myself to be pulled into her sexual vortex.
This last year has been hell.
I lost a father—who wasn’t really my father, almost lost a mother, and gained a sister who will also, oddly enough, become my sister-in-law in the very new future.
My life is a fucking mess.
I should have my shit together, but I don’t. I work, fuck, drink, and sleep—and not always in that order. My life has spiraled out of control, and there doesn’t seem to be a damn thing I can do about it. I should be happy, free from the Ambrosis, but I’m not. I have a huge, empty hole in me that I can’t seem to fill. I’m working hard to play the part of doting brother, though I’m constantly brushing off Shae and Rex’s concerns about how I’m holding up.
Yet despite my best efforts to appear happy and unaffected, I suspect they see right through me.
I’m sick of them constantly nagging at me to talk to someone about what happened, which is why I jumped at the chance for some extra work, especially since that extra work means getting the fuck out of dodge.
The last thing I want is them worrying about me. They’ve finally got each other, and they’re in a good place. They should be worrying about their wedding and going on that expensive fucking honeymoon, not my unstable ass. I can’t explain how I’m feeling to them, and I can’t tell them what I’m doing to cope. Hell no. They wouldn’t understand, and the less they know the better.
My phone rings, and I tug it from my pocket, careful not to disturb Lacey.
“Harder,” I tell her before I answer.
She follows my command, sucking me in, and when I hit the back of her throat, I thrust my hips forward, forcing myself deeper. She nearly gags, but this woman is a powerhouse and doesn’t let it stop her.
“Right fucking there. That’s it,” I grunt.
She moans as I swipe my finger across my phone.
“Hello?”
There’s something oddly erotic about having my cock shoved down a woman’s throat while carrying on with business. It would be even better if I was buried in her pussy.
“It’s time.”
My back stiffens at the sound of Giovanni’s voice.
“You there?” he asks after a moment.
“Yeah. I’m here.”
“You in or not, kid?”
This is what I’ve been waiting for. A purpose. I wish I could’ve done it without shoving myself back into the life I was so desperate to leave, but I don’t have much of a choice.
“I’m in.”
“Shit’s going down fast. Get home, pack your bag, and be ready to go.”
He disconnects the call before I have a chance to respond. With my phone gripped tight in my hand, I smile to myself and look down at Lacey.
It’s about goddamn time I do something with myself.
I need to get the fuck out of here, so I curl my fingers around her hair, guiding her head over my cock in a faster rhythm. My orgasm slams into me hard, and as I growl out my release, she sucks every last drop from my body.
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