by Lisa Ladew
“Da, no. He’s just a good guy who needs a hand, and I’m offering it like you taught us. I thought you’d be proud of me.”
Her father’s eyebrows flew up his forehead. Angus cleared his throat as he leaned over and kissed the hair at Kate’s temple, then winked one mischievous eye. “I am, Katydid. I am.”
Chapter 5
“Fire!” Dan came awake with a start, pawing frantically at his blankets, trying to put out the flames. The “stop, drop, and roll,” chant from grade school flashed in his mind and he leaned to the side, rolling off the bed, landing on his injured arm with a thud, the pain making him gasp.
Clean air whooshed into his lungs and Dan startled, confused, the darkness of the room not helping at all. No smoke? No fire? He squinted at his legs tangled in the bedding and saw only unbroken, clean fabric. All a dream.
Dan extricated himself from the blankets and sat down on his bed, his head in his hands. The final moments of his dream continued to reverberate through his mind; an enormous boom shaking the world, followed by everything raining fire. The sensations were so real, Dan began to wonder if he wasn’t dreaming of a memory from his former life. But what the hell was it?
The dream still heavy on his mind, he grabbed his towel and headed upstairs for a quick shower, trying to determine what it could have meant if it was a memory. Maybe he was firefighter? A bomb squad cop? A meth manufacturer? Yuck. Stop it!
Since there was no bathroom in the basement, he had to share the upstairs one. It was a little awkward, but the Bandons had done nothing but try to set him at ease every day since his arrival.
That first day, after he showed Dan the basement room, Aiden had proposed that they go buy him some new clothes. “And some good shoes, too. Your feet are gonna be screaming after a day in the restaurant if you don’t have good shoes.”
So the two men had gone shopping together, a bizarre happening that Dan was sure he had never experienced before, amnesia or not. Aiden was a loudmouth and a smartass, and Dan found himself warming to the man immediately.
“Yeah, the thing you gotta know about Kate is that she’s tough as nails. She and I have been going ’round and ’round since I was two and got taller than her. We’re just over a year apart, you know. Actual Irish twins.” His grin had been as wide as his face when he spoke about any of his siblings, but especially Kate, his only sister.
Dan stepped into the shower and turned on the water, sighing as the heat began to scrub the dream away, his mind still turning over his outing with Aiden. They had been wandering around an outdoor mall, moving from store to store to find all the basics Dan would need. Jeans, shoes, socks, and underwear had weighed down the bags he carried as they swung into yet another shop.
“She never let me forget she was older, no matter how big I got. I remember one time, I must have been eight, we were on the trampoline and I kept bouncing her too high, messing her up when she’d try to do flips and shit. She left. Which, of course, was exactly what I wanted to happen.
“I didn’t think anything of it after that. Typical guy, right? That night, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and cut off huge hunks of my hair. I had to get a buzz cut the next day. Killed me dead.” Aiden shook his long locks as he headed toward a corner of the store that sported rack after rack of pop culture t-shirts.
Dan laughed as he imagined a young Kate exacting her revenge on her sleeping brother. It was exactly the kind of relationship he’d want to have with his siblings… if he had any. The thought sobered him instantly. Aiden hadn’t appeared to notice, stepping up to a rack of shirts and beginning to flip through them.
“So just watch your ass, man. Don’t ever piss her off. Don’t fuck her over. Or, if you do, don’t give her access to any part of your body that you want to keep.”
“Nah, man, it’s not like that. Kate and I are friends. I mean, shit, we just met a few days ago, and I don’t even know who I am.” Dan didn’t want any of Kate’s family to get the impression he was trying to make a move on her. He wouldn’t do that. No matter how her green eyes drove him insane, he wouldn’t take advantage of her family’s kindness.
Aiden looked him up and down skeptically, as if he knew where Dan’s mind really was. He frowned for a moment, then shook his head, making Dan feel immediately apologetic. Fuck.
“So, how about this one?” Aiden pointed to the wall and a shirt sporting a sketch of a pig wearing a chef’s hat and looking over its shoulder with a come-hither glance. Letters beneath spelled out “Rub my butt. Make it spicy.”
Dan broke into a grin. Exactly his style. Was it? Maybe. “I’ll take it.”
Now, three days later, Dan had a small wardrobe of clothes, a job, and a roof over his head. As he washed his body and hair, he marveled at how much worse things could have been. Not only if Kate hadn’t invited him to her house, but if she’d never stumbled across him out in those woods at all. It wasn’t that far-fetched to say she’d saved his life.
Dan washed and rinsed and wondered how Kate was. He’d barely seen her the last few days, his schedule at the restaurant so busy that sleep was the only thing on his mind when he came home. He missed her, he realized. She was an important part of his… life and he wanted to see her, talk to her. Hang out with her.
His cock gave a throb as he ran the soap over it. He frowned, his mind looking for stories that lived in his head about anything that had to do with him and sex. But no memories seemed to exist. He knew what sex was, knew he’d had it, but he couldn’t dredge up any faces of women in his mind that he’d been with. He checked his left hand for the hundredth time in the last few days. No wedding ring. They’d talked to the police the day before, who’d taken a report, but said no one had reported him missing. So he must not be married. Dating anyone? The hole in his brain that said I don’t have a clue, mixed frustration with irritation and he gritted his teeth, his fingers clutching the towel.
Between the hospital and his new living situation, Dan hadn’t had an orgasm since he woke up in the Oregon forest. And he didn’t see himself having much time to explore relationships right now, or even one-night stands. For sexual satisfaction, he was on his own.
As he began to stroke his shaft with his soap-covered hand, an image of Kate took shape in his mind. Shame at the dick move of imagining her in a sexual situation couldn’t stop her image from filling his mind. Just this one time… He imagined her joining him in the shower, dropping to her knees, taking him in her lush mouth as those green eyes gazed at him lustfully. Dan gritted his teeth and swallowed his groan as his climax moved through him, taking the merest edge off his tension. What he wouldn’t give to actually have her there, wanting him in the way he wanted her. Shit, he’d make it worth her while.
Dan finished off and climbed out of the shower, then realized he hadn’t brought any clean clothes with him. Stupid.
Nobody had been awake when he came upstairs; maybe that would still be the case. Clutching his towel tightly around his hips and his dirty clothes to his chest, Dan peeked his head out the door and listened. The only noise he heard was the grumbling snore of Angus, sleeping at the end of the hall.
Clear coast confirmed, Dan moved quickly to the staircase and started down. Just a few steps from the bottom, he heard the door to the kitchen open. Too late to stop now. He prepared to wave a casual greeting and continue on to his room with a minimum of embarrassment.
But the sight that greeted him stopped him short. Kate dragged into the kitchen, her eyes red and her hair a mess. It was a stark change from how she’d come home the last few days, still looking put-together and raring to hike a dozen miles.
“Kate, what’s the matter? You okay?” His semi-naked state forgotten, all Dan could see was the devastation written on her face. He had to know what had caused it, and if he could help make it better.
Kate startled, as if she hadn’t even known he was there until he spoke. Her cheeks flamed red as she replied. “Yeah, sure. No worries. It was just a bad day at work.”
Her lips started trembling before the words were out of her mouth, the final one cut off by her gulping sob. Dan watched Kate raise a shaking hand to her lips, meeting his eyes with such a forlorn expression he felt a corresponding pull in his heart. Something was breaking her and he couldn’t just stand idly by and watch.
“Hey, come here.” Dan walked over and folded one arm around Kate’s neck, tucking her head beneath his chin and her face against his chest as the floodgates opened. Slick, hot tears dripped from her skin to his as she wept.
“We got a call yesterday. A girl… she, I tried everything. She didn’t- I can’t even talk about it.” A fresh wave of grief and tears flowed out of Kate, her body weight sagging slightly against Dan. He closed his eyes and breathed deep at the sensation, at how special it felt to be there for her this way. He tried to think of what he would want to hear in her place.
“No need to talk about it. I’m sorry you hurt so bad, Kate, but it shows your heart. You’re an amazing person to accept the shitty days for the chance at making a difference on the good days.”
Her sobs against his chest gradually slowed, eased, and turned to sniffles. Dan tried hard to stay perfectly still, to not do anything she might read as him wanting to withdraw. He wasn’t even sure she’d realized his half-naked state yet, and he didn’t want her to feel awkward when she finally caught on.
Which might happen sooner rather than later, if his body had anything to say about it. Now that Kate’s tears had turned to soft breaths and hiccups against his chest, he was becoming more aware of how she felt tucked into his body. His fantasy from the shower still lingered, and his half-naked body heated as he held her.
Kate seemed to become aware all at once. She looked up with a shocked expression, her green eyes standing out even more against the redness surrounding them. Her mouth opened as if she was about to say something, but only sweet, warm breath came out. Dan wanted nothing more at that moment than to lean down and nibble her plump lips, pulling a moan out of her. You are such an ass.
Her hand came up to rest just above his heart, her fingertips pressing lightly into the muscles there. She looked for all the world like a woman who wanted to be kissed, and Dan’s mind filled with images of him taking her mouth, how it would feel, where it would lead.
And with that thought, reality came rushing back. What was he going to do, fuck her in her brother’s bed and hope her father didn’t hear the screams? Dan gave his brain a shake, forced a gentle smile to his face, and said the first non-sexual thing that came to mind.
“I bet you could use a nice bath. I left plenty of hot water.” Even as the words left his mouth, Dan kicked himself. A bath? A bath was going to heal the wound of not being able to save an innocent life? He scrambled to cover his mistake.
“I know it doesn’t fix anything, just… you should take care of yourself. You’ve got a tough job. I don’t think you get enough credit for that around here.”
Kate blinked up at him, her expression at once perplexed and awed. “Why do you say that?”
Dan swallowed. He should be downstairs right now, putting on pants.
“I just noticed your brothers give you a lot of shit for not working at the restaurant, being part of the family business. And you never tell them how much harder your job is than theirs, how much more important to the world. I guess I just wanted you to know that I notice.”
Kate’s voice was a breathy whisper. “Thank you.”
Dan was about to reply when a floorboard creaked above them, serving notice that the rest of the house was stirring. Kate practically jumped out of his arms, her cheeks heating with a blush once more, and Dan had to smile at how charming he found her nervousness.
“Hey, what’s your schedule like? I’ve got the day off tomorrow and I was thinking about going back out to where you found me, looking to see if there are any clues. We didn’t really have a chance to check the surrounding area that day, what with the hole you found in my arm and everything.”
Kate was nodding before he’d even finished his pitch. “Yeah, sure, I’ve got the day off, too. When do you want to head out?”
“After lunch?”
“Perfect.”
“Great,” he nearly whispered. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then. I mean, if I don’t see you tonight.” Dan backed slowly towards the staircase, towel still clutched tightly in his fist. He could feel drops of water running down his back from his still-damp hair.
“See you tomorrow.” Kate’s eyes were still red, but there was a spark that hadn’t been there when she’d entered the kitchen. Her light was back, and Dan couldn’t help but feel grateful if maybe he was part of the reason.
Chapter 6
“And she’s off!” Dan laughed as he and Kate exited her car the next day. They’d barely made it out the doors before Molly was darting down the path, gamboling happily through the ferns and looking for them to follow.
“Man, what a gorgeous day.” Kate stood tall, breathing deep and stretching her arms above her head. The cool, fresh air filled her lungs and she felt her muscles ache with a pleasant soreness. Secretly, she knew the day would not have seemed quite so wonderful without Dan there with her.
They set off through the trees, their steps falling into an easy rhythm. Kate looked over at Dan, curious. “So, how’s it feel, coming back to the scene of the crime? So to speak.”
He considered for a moment. “Damn strange. First time I saw this place was when I was leaving it. How the hell does that work?” Kate could see his forehead was scrunched together, and his tone was sardonic. His lack of memory had to frustrate him to no end. She couldn’t imagine how she would feel in his place.
“Well, just remember what the psychologist told you and try not to force it. Maybe we’ll get lucky and find some clues.” Or not. There’d been heavy rain for two days after she found Dan, so any evidence would likely be long gone. At best, it was probably going to be an exercise in closure for him until he got his memory back. If he got it back.
She was happy to be there, though. Kate had never known anyone who could stay so positive in the face of such challenges, but Dan managed it with grace. Her father reported that he was the new customer favorite at the restaurant, with his conscientious and friendly attitude. If he needed some time to come to terms with the hard parts of his current situation, she wanted to help in any way she could.
Especially after yesterday. Kate warmed at the thought of how Dan had held her in his arms when she came home, wrecked by the death she’d been unable to prevent. Her brothers’ comforting techniques extended to offering a beer and a hearty slap on the shoulder, while her father was usually inclined to pat her shoulder and say something trite about how everything happens for a reason, and she should just quit her job and come back to work at the restaurant.
Dan was different. He saw how much pain she was in and didn’t try to hide from it or smooth it over. Kate had never known such a strong man to be so empathetic.
They talked easily during their hike out to the ravine where she’d found him, Molly loping ahead and then doubling back to check on them before striking off on her own again. When they reached the sloping ground, it was thick with mud that sucked at their shoes as they crossed the low point.
“Well, that’s it for footprints, huh?” Dan held out his hand to Kate as she stepped over a puddle. His fingers were warm, his grip firm as he braced himself to give her leverage. Kate felt a zing up her arm that made her nipples pebble, and her eyes shot to his face to see if he felt it too.
He wasn’t looking at her, but he held her hand for a few seconds after she was on solid ground before letting go. He pointed up, to the ledge above the outcropping where Kate had found him. “Maybe up there?”
The face of the ravine on that side was nearly vertical and made of soft ground. They had to walk several dozen yards to the side before they could venture up and back to the place where Dan must have gone over the edge. Kate scanned the forest floor as they walked, kicking
aside leaves and ferns with her feet, looking for anything that would tell them what had happened.
Once they reached the point where it seemed Dan must have fallen, he was energized. He started mumbling to himself as he examined the trees near the ledge and the surrounding undergrowth. Kate caught a few words here and there, things like “trajectory” and “blood trail”.
He walked twenty yards in every direction while muttering about shell casings. Kate joined silently in the search, keeping her eyes peeled for anything that looked like it could be metal. She found a soda can pop top and a very shiny rock.
“Shit!” The sudden outburst from Dan made Kate’s head shoot up, startled. His cheeks were red with anger and his jaw was set. She watched as he pounded his fist against the nearest tree a half dozen times then sagged, resting his forehead against the rough bark.
Kate stepped closer without thinking and reached her hand out to stroke Dan’s back. She wished she could give him the answers he needed to work through his amnesia and get his life back. Even if it meant she never saw him again, she wanted him to know who he was.
“This isn’t the end, Dan. We’ll keep looking, we’ll check missing persons reports and run your photo through search engines. You’ll get your memory and your identity back. It’ll happen, you just have to be patient a while longer.” They’d already tried it, though, and hadn’t turned up anything. Hard to believe, with all the face-recognition tools available. Next step was social media and the news, although Dan seemed reluctant to try either. Kate could understand that. Especially given the circumstances in which he’d been found.
“How much longer?” Dan’s voice was a quiet growl, a blend of hopelessness and frustration. Then he sighed, and his tone changed completely.
