by Lara Wynter
“You never mention him by name do you?”
“Voldemort.”
Wes actually laughs before he smothers the sound. My laugh follows his, allowing some of the tension to briefly leave my body. We climb in the back of the taxi and Wes asks the driver to take us up to Mt. Lee. He’s reluctant at first, citing the narrow streets and the fact that it will be too dark to wander around the park anyway, but Wes finally convinces him.
I reach out and take Wes’s hand in my own. Sensing he needs my support more than my words right now.
Wes
The feel of Jemma’s hand in mine, helps to calm my racing mind. I don’t think I could live with myself if something happened to Sophie. The car takes another sharp bend and Jemma’s shoulder leans into mine. It helps me to stay connected, to not let the fog overwhelm my thoughts.
“That’s it! That’s Jackson’s car,” Jemma pushes open the car door while the taxi is still moving.
I tug her back before she falls out of the moving vehicle. “Whoa, let’s at least wait for the car to stop.”
The car stops and Jemma jumps out. I tell the driver to park and wait for us, and I jog over to Jackson’s car. Jemma peeks into the tinted passenger window.
“They’re not here, but Sophie’s sweater is on the seat.”
I peer over her shoulder through the darkened glass. It’s definitely Sophie’s pink sweater on the passenger seat. Thank goodness. They must be here somewhere.
I take a step back. The streetlights don’t provide an abundance of light but it’s enough to see we’re at the entrance to Lake Hollywood Park. “They must have gone into the park. If he’s taken advantage of her in any way, I’m going to kill him.”
Jemma takes a hold of my hand. “Just breathe, Wes. They can’t have gone far in the dark. I’m sure nothing bad has happened.”
I let Jemma lead me into the darkened park. I try to do what she’s asked and focus on my breathing. In out. In out. In out.
“Look, over there.” Jemma tugs on my hand again.
The glow of a mobile phone screen is visible further into the park. I start running. I sure hope there are no holes or obstacles in my way. Sophie’s face is visible by the light from the screen. Jackson sitting right beside her. Her face is at first startled, and then she has that look that tells me she’s recognized me.
“Soph,” It comes out more of a sob than anything. I surprise myself by dropping to my knees and throwing my arms around her. All thoughts of Jackson momentarily forgotten with the joy of seeing my baby sister seemingly unharmed. “Oh, Soph, what were you thinking?” Tears are running down my face, but I don’t care. I hold her tight, never wanting to let her go.
“Wes, I’m sorry,” Sophie holds me tight as her tears drip onto my shirt. “Please don’t be mad at me. I just love Jackson, and I wanted to be with him.”
I pull back. “You love him? Sophie, you’re only thirteen years old. You can’t go flying across the country just because you have a crush on some actor.”
Jackson jumps to his feet and takes a step backward his hands held out in front of him. “What the heck, Soph? Thirteen! You told me you were seventeen!” His head drops as he shakes it slowly from side to side. “Thirteen, no. No, this is not happening.”
I stand back up my fists clenched at my side. “What. Did. You. Do?”
Jemma looks between us as if she’s not quite sure who needs her the most right now. Sophie grabs hold of one of my arms.
“Nothing happened, Wes. He just kissed me. Nothing else, I swear.”
“You kissed her,” I shout.
Jackson stumbles back another step. “She told me she was seventeen. I swear I wouldn’t have kissed her if I’d known she was only thirteen. You have to believe me, I’m no perv. She said she was my age, and I believed her.”
I take a step toward Jackson. The tension in my body seeks release.
Jemma grabs hold of my other arm. “Wes, don’t do anything stupid. I think he’s telling the truth. You don’t need publicity over this. Just think about how it would play out in the media.” Jemma lets go of my arm and steps in front of me. Her face looks like that of an angel in the dim light. Her curls are a golden halo around her sweet face.
“Just think of what they would write about Sophie. It could ruin her life before she’s even had a chance to begin it. I know what she did was foolish and dangerous, but fighting is not going to fix this.”
The tension slowly leaches from body and I close my eyes. “I know. I know.”
“You believe me?” Jackson looks at me as if he’s just had an unexpected reprieve.
“I might believe you, but you’d better not come within 1,000 miles of my sister ever again if you want to keep that pretty face of yours.”
“That won’t be a problem.” He looks at Sophie who still has tears streaming down her face. “I want to be mad at you, Soph, but you’re such an amazing chick. I just wish you really were my age.”
My anger rises again. “You’d better stop right there, Jackson. I think you’d better leave now.”
“Uh, yeah. Sorry.” Jackson turns and stumbles before bolting out of the park.
“You’ve ruined everything, Wes.” Sophie pulls away from me.
“I’ve ruined everything? You must be joking. You are in so much trouble, if you think I’m ever letting you out of the house again–”
“You won’t even be there half the time. How are you going to stop me?”
“Leon and Stan can watch you around the clock.”
“You can’t do that to me. I hate you!”
My heart feels as if it’s being crushed. I know she’s just angry, but we’ve never said anything like that to each other before. We have to stick together. We’re all we have.
Jemma steps forward and puts an arm around each of us. “I think that’s enough for now. You’re both really angry and hurt and you’re going to say things you don’t mean. Let’s just focus on what’s important. Sophie is safe and well and nothing terrible happened. Let’s just go home and we can talk about this once you’ve both had a chance to calm down.”
As much as I want to keep yelling at Sophie right now, a part of me knows she’s right. Even though we’re both physically taller than Jemma, she somehow manages to guide us back to the waiting Taxi. Jackson’s car is gone. We climb into the back of the taxi, Jemma in between us, and drive in silence back to the airport. Jemma sends a text message to Stan. We can’t risk the Taxi driver overhearing what just happened. Hopefully no one heard any of what we were shouting and recognized us. I just want this day to be over.
Chapter 13
Jemma
The raised voices carry up the stairwell. I increase my pace. This has gone on long enough. It’s time for me to intervene. I was hoping they could work things out between them and things could go back to normal, but since we been back it’s been nothing but yelling and arguing. Sophie doesn’t think what she did was all that bad and Wes is constantly in a state of agitation.
“This has gone on long enough, Sophie. You need to accept what you did was wrong and listen to me.” Wes sounds as if he’s about to lose his voice from shouting too much.
“You can’t tell me what to do. You’re not my father!”
“I am your legal guardian. If you don’t want to live with me, see how you get on in the foster system!”
I jump the last few stairs and race into the lounge room. “Whoa,” I say as I slide to a stop on the polished wooden floor between the two red faced siblings. “You both need to take a deep breath and calm down.”
The identical expressions of surprise on their faces would be almost comical if I wasn’t so upset right now.
“As much as I really didn’t want to get involved, I can’t let things escalate any further. Now let’s all sit down and discuss this like rational human beings.”
Sophie opens her mouth to argue, but I glare at her and she meekly sits on the sofa furthest away from the one Wes has chosen. I take a seat between them and spread my
hands out in a placating gesture.
“Now, Sophie, can you admit that running away without telling Wes where you were going wasn’t a good idea?”
Sophie looks at the floor before mumbling, “I suppose.”
Well, better than nothing. “And Wes, can you accept Sophie’s apology?”
“Yes, but she really isn’t sorry for running off—”
Sophie jumps to her feet. “Why won’t you listen to me? You have no idea what it’s like. I can’t handle this. I’m going to Finn and Autumn’s house.”
Wes jumps up. I put my hand on his arm and I can feel the tension in his corded muscles. “Just let her go, Wes. I think maybe some time apart is for the best right now.”
The front door slams and Wes drops back into the upholstered leather sofa, his head in his hands. I make a quick phone call to Leon to make sure he accompanies Sophie to Finn and Autumn’s house. And then I make another call to Autumn to make sure they know Sophie is coming.
Turning back to Wes, I can see silent sobs rack his body. I hesitate for a moment. I want to comfort him, but I am all too aware that we are all alone here. Still, I can’t leave him like this. I sit beside him and gently place my arm around his shoulders. Wes would be here for me if the situation were reversed. I need to do the same for him in spite of the feelings of longing that threaten to overwhelm me when I’m this close.
Wes turns toward me and pulls me tightly against his chest. My arm and shoulder throb where they press against his firm body but I welcome the pain to help me keep my focus. I’m all too aware of where this could lead if I don’t keep my emotions in check. Wes is in pain and he’s looking for comfort. He’s not thinking straight right now.
Wes’s grip doesn’t loosen, but eventually his breathing evens out. I take a deep breath, unaware until now that I’d been literally too afraid to breathe. Slowly, Wes relaxes his grip on me, and I feel his arms gently rub up and down my back. An involuntary shiver runs through me. Wes sighs and continues to gently caress my back. I try to ease away and extricate myself from his arms.
“Please, not yet. Please let me hold you just for a moment longer?”
I’m powerless to resist. “Okay, just for a moment.”
Wes’s arms go still, and I slowly relax. The feeling is amazing. If only I thought this could work out between us, I could have this feeling forever. My heart hurts at the thought of pulling away, so I let myself have a moment longer.
Wes sighs, and then I feel his warm breath against my neck. The feel of his lips against my skin sends a jolt of electricity through my whole body. I scoot backward along the couch. It’s my fault. I was supposed to be the one in control. I knew I should have let go.
“Shi— Sorry, Jemma. I swear I wasn’t planning to do that. I just wanted to feel the comfort of your arms around me. I just wanted to feel…”
Wes’s voice trails away, but I have a feeling I know what he was about to say. He wanted to feel loved. And I know he hasn’t had much of that in his life. He deserves to be loved.
“It’s not your fault, Wes. I knew when to pull away. I just didn’t do it.”
Wes gently runs the back of his hand down my cheek. “I want you in my life, Jem. Even if it’s just as a friend. But you have to know I’m in love with you. Do you have any feelings for me at all?”
I search his eyes, but all I see is a genuine lack of understanding about how I’m feeling. “Oh Wes, of course I have feelings for you.”
“But you don’t love me?”
I look away. Scared if I look into his eyes again he’ll know. He gently lifts my chin until I’m forced to look at him again.
“Jemma, please tell me how you feel.”
My eyes fill with tears. “I really care about you, Wes, how could I not? You are the most amazing man I’ve ever met. But don’t you see? It could never work between us. I want to live a normal, quiet life. I…I just can’t see myself touring the world. Having the press take my picture wherever I go… I don’t want to settle for something temporary. I want to give my heart to someone forever.”
Wes pulls back, the pain I’ve just inflicted, visible in the brown depths of his eyes. “What if I quit the band? Would that make a difference?”
“Maybe it would. But I can’t be the reason you quit music. I don’t want to have you resent me for giving up what you love.”
“There are other things I want to do with my life beside music. Maybe this would give me a chance to do them.”
I blink back tears. I wish I could give in. I wish I could believe that this is the answer. “Would you even consider giving up music now if you’d never met me?”
Wes hangs his head in defeat. “No.”
A tear runs down my cheek. “Can we still be friends?”
Wes’s eyes stare intently into my own for a moment. “Friends? If that’s all we can be then I’ll take it.”
“Just don’t forget how much I care about you. I know the sort of man you are. Your strength and honesty are what drew me to you in the first place.”
He looks away, and when he turns back to me, somehow, he’s smiling. It’s as if he’s somehow managed to push his pain deep inside somewhere. “You mean it wasn’t my gorgeous face and cute butt?”
I slap his arm playfully. “Well, maybe at first…” I’m not sure if it’s healthy for him to switch moods so fast, but maybe this is his way of coping.
Wes stands and slaps a hand on his denim-clad butt. “You know I won Hottest Rear last year, don’t you?”
I laugh. Somehow, even now, Wes manages to make me happy. “That is so not a thing.”
Wes smiles, but his eyes betray him. “You can google it if you don’t believe me.”
“Um…I’m not sure I’m game to see what comes up under that search. I’ll just ask Finn.”
“Don’t you dare.” Wes comes over and rests one knee on the couch beside me. “I’ll have to tickle you until you promise never to utter the words cutest bum or anything similar in front of any of my bandmates, especially Finn.”
I pretend to ponder for a moment. “You know, I’m not actually that ticklish. I think I might still have to ask him. Your threats won’t work on me, Mr. Bowman.”
Wes calls my bluff and his fingers tickle my ribs and run up my back until he reaches my neck. I squeal and try to wriggle away, but only end up landing myself on the floor. Wes continues his attack as I beg for mercy.
“So you promise you won’t tell Finn?”
“Um,” I shriek as he finds a particularly sensitive place on my ribs. “Okay, I promise.”
Wes stops tickling me and I’m suddenly hyper aware of how close he is. His body hovers over mine on the floor. He lowers his body slightly so that his lips are just inches from my own.
“I want to kiss you so badly right now,” Wes’s eyes penetrate my entire being, and I feel as if my soul is laid bare before him. “But I won’t.” He pushes himself back up, and I can see the muscles in his arms bulge against the fabric of his T-shirt. He gets to his feet and holds out his hand to me. I take it with my good arm and he pulls me slowly to my feet.
“I’m going to do this the right way, Jemma Jones. I’m going to go slow, and I’m going to show you that we can be forever. You’ll see we can overcome the things keeping us apart. I know you have doubts, but I plan to show you we can make it work.”
My breath catches in my throat as I see the sincerity in his eyes. Wes Bowman is not a man to go back on his word.
Chapter 14
Wes
Jemma has my heart, and I’m determined not to break my word to her. I will show her that I can be her forever, no matter what I have to do. If it means giving up the band, I will. If it means finding out more about God, I will. If it means getting help with Sophie, I’ll do that too. Sophie has spent the last few days with Finn and Autumn, and for me at least, it’s helped me to put things in perspective. What Sophie did was really stupid and thoughtless, but constantly yelling at her to do what I say is obviously not the a
nswer. Finn tells me that Sophie has also had a chance to calm down. Apparently she’s finally showing some remorse. I’ve always known my sister was a bit of a spitfire, I guess I just didn’t know I share the same traits. Heck, I’ve been suppressing my own feelings for so long it was bound to catch up with me eventually.
Looks like Doctor Mary will be seeing our whole extended messed up family soon. It’s a wonder she has time for any of her regular patients at Peaceful Shores Recovery Center. The last few days have given me time to think about our next tour. My first thought was to find someone to replace me, but now that Trapped Within has become so popular, that really isn’t such a great option right now. It was actually Autumn who convinced me that bringing Sophie on tour was the best solution for everyone. She even agreed to go back to tutoring Soph so that Jemma has time to study. I still haven’t talked to Jemma about it. In fact, we haven’t talked about much serious stuff since we both admitted to our feelings. Jemma has been spending nearly all daylight hours in the garden, and I’ve been in the studio writing more songs.
Watching the way the dappled sunlight shines on her hair as she brings the garden to life gives me enough inspiration to write a thousand songs. Most of them are instrumental compositions. I can express the desires of my heart without anyone knowing the depth of my emotions. I need to take things slowly with our relationship. I need her to see that this is going to work between us. The music I write is all being recorded for her. When the time is right, I’ll play it for her and then she’ll know.
I stand up from behind the piano and stretch. Out in the fading afternoon light Jemma stands and presses her hands into the lower part of her back. It’s probably sore from the excessive amount of time she’s been spending out there. I’ll have to increase her salary for all the work she’s been doing. I chuckle quietly picturing her reaction if I tried to do that. She’s already told me on more than one occasion that I’m paying her too much. But what do I need with millions in the bank? What happiness has all that money ever brought me?
