Never Be the Same

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Never Be the Same Page 7

by M. A. Binfield


  “I’m always waiting. It’s what I’m paid to do. You don’t need to apologize.” Casey turned and walked ahead of Olivia toward the doors. As ever, her tone was infuriatingly reasonable. Olivia watched her go.

  She hated herself for caring about Casey’s opinion of her almost as much as she hated herself for noticing just how good Casey’s ass and thighs looked in the tight gray uniform pants.

  “How is it that I didn’t notice how hot she was yesterday?” Louise appeared at Olivia’s right shoulder as Liam joined her on the other side. “Was she even wearing that uniform yesterday?”

  “The pants and fancy shirt but not the jacket,” Liam replied, sounding a little sullen.

  “Well, I’m surprised I didn’t notice.”

  “She spent most of yesterday in the car, Lou. Not even you can develop a crush on the back of someone’s head.” Olivia felt her temper spark again. She did not need Louise to start “noticing” Casey.

  They reached the car, where Casey was standing at attention with the back door open, waiting for them to climb inside. Olivia followed Liam into the back of the car and then watched with surprise as Louise slammed the door shut and climbed into the front passenger seat. They all waited for Casey to get inside.

  “I was thinking I might travel up front with you if that’s okay. I’ll get to see a lot more this way.” She looked back at Olivia with a wink before buckling her seat belt, not leaving room for Casey to object. Not that Olivia expected her to. She was nothing if not accommodating.

  Olivia was annoyed she hadn’t had the nerve to think of sitting up front herself. It would have been the perfect way to try to engage Casey in some conversation that didn’t make her seem like a bad tempered bundle of privilege.

  “It’s about a forty-minute drive, but we’re late setting off so there’ll be more traffic. I’ll try to get you there on time, but I can’t promise.” Casey pulled the SUV out of the hotel parking lot.

  “If we’re late, I’m just going to tell them it’s because we waited for Billie to decide whether she could be bothered to join us.” Louise seemed to get annoyed all over again. “I’m pretty sick of the way she’s allowed to pick and choose what she joins in with. It’s not fair—”

  “People get sick, Lou. Look at Liam. You guys bailed on me that first day and I just made the best of a bad situation. And I had a pretty good day in the end.” Olivia was talking to Louise, of course, but she was also talking to Casey.

  “Why don’t we just change the subject. I’m pretty sure Casey doesn’t want to hear all about our office politics,” Liam cut in.

  “I bet Casey’s pretty good at not-listening.” Louise turned to Casey as she spoke, and Olivia could almost hear her eyelashes fluttering. “You must hear a lot of stuff said in the back of cars that you’re not supposed to. Maybe you’re like a priest and can’t tell anyone what happens in the black leather seats that act as your very own confessional chamber.” Her tone was flirty. No one had ever said “black leather seats” with as much innuendo as Louise managed in that moment, and Olivia was irritated to see Casey react with a smile.

  “This is my first driving job for about a year, so I’d forgotten what it’s like, but yeah, people can get pretty relaxed and forget where they are. Forget that there’s this thing too. We see everything.” Casey reached up and tapped the rearview mirror, and for a second, she locked eyes with Olivia. “Some things you wish you could unsee, but some things are utterly charming.” Olivia felt heat prickling across her skin as Casey held her gaze a moment longer before looking back at the road.

  “Ooh, do tell. You can leave out the names—”

  “What’s the horsepower on this thing?” Liam leaned into the space between the front seats, interrupting Louise mid-flirt. The inside of the car was silent for a beat, and Olivia wanted to hug him for throwing Louise off her stride.

  “Three hundred and six,” Casey replied.

  Liam nodded as if it mattered. Though Olivia knew damn well he had about as much interest as she did in cars. They were all acting like other people today. Except maybe Casey. Olivia didn’t know enough about her to know what she was normally like, but she was responding to Louise’s friendliness—for want of a better word—much better than Olivia had expected.

  “Zero to sixty in five point two seconds. Top speed of one hundred and fifty-five miles per hour. It’s Mercedes’s fastest SUV,” Casey added, interrupting the silence.

  “You like fast cars?” Louise made it sound like she was asking Casey something else entirely. It had been a long time since Olivia had seen her flirt this hard. Casey waited a second before answering, and—in the eyes that she could see in the mirror—Olivia detected amusement. Surely, she didn’t think Louise being like this was appealing?

  “Not at all. But I know people are always going to ask me so I try to make sure I’ve got something convincing to say. Truth be told, I hate cars and I hate driving. I’m much happier when I’m on foot.” This time Olivia was pretty sure that Casey was talking to her. She wasn’t sure whether to smile or be offended.

  “Was I convincing?” Casey addressed her question to Liam.

  “I don’t know. I don’t know anything about cars either. I was just making conversation.” He sat back in his seat. “Conversation that’s more appropriate to the circumstances anyway.”

  Louise turned around to look at him, a frown on her face. The tension in the car had notched up a few degrees. And there was only another thirty minutes of this to endure. Olivia leaned across and lifted the remote control from the pocket in the seat in front of her.

  “I’m going to find a news channel to listen to if that’s okay. I feel out of touch since we got here. Be good to find out what’s happening in the world.” Olivia began to flick through the channels, not knowing what she was looking for. Casey pressed a button on the console in front of her and the sounds of a newscaster filled the car.

  “News channel.”

  “Thank you.”

  The slight lift of Casey’s shoulders was all the response she got.

  * * *

  “The London Eye!”

  Olivia had been dozing, and Louise’s shriek of recognition made her jump.

  “Stop the car. Let’s take some pictures. That’s an Instagram moment for sure.”

  Olivia looked out the window to see that they were crawling along a wide bridge and London’s famous giant wheel was on the opposite riverbank up ahead of them.

  “You’re shrieking at that, but you just let Big Ben go by without a mention.” Liam pointed out the famous tower through the rear window.

  “No way.” Louise swiveled in her seat before placing a palm on Casey’s thigh. “Please, can you pull over so we can take some pictures?”

  “I can’t, I’m sorry. Double red lines. It means no stopping…under any circumstances.” Casey hadn’t pushed the hand away and Louise hadn’t moved it. Olivia couldn’t help but feel jealous. Louise had all the moves, and Casey seemed as receptive as every other one of her targets.

  “Please, Casey.”

  “She already said she can’t, Lou. Stop whining. No one’s going to change England’s traffic rules just because you want a selfie.” Liam spoke through gritted teeth. His mood didn’t seem any better than Olivia’s.

  “Okay, jeez, someone’s a party pooper today.” Olivia could hear the pout in Louise’s voice. “We’re in London and these are London landmarks. It’s good publicity for the show. Shame I’m the only one who cares about the importance of maintaining an Instagram profile.”

  She finally withdrew her hand from Casey’s thigh and pushed the button that lowered the window. They were on the left-hand side of the bridge—the best side for Louise to at least get a photo from her seat. She tried a couple of selfies, but as the traffic slowed to a halt, she handed her phone to Casey. “Can you try?”

  Olivia wai
ted for Casey to say no. She was their driver, she was in charge of the car, on a busy road, and Louise was being a pain in the ass.

  “Sure.” Casey surprised Olivia by taking the phone, and after a quick glance at the traffic around them, took a handful of photos. She looked at the screen before handing the phone back to Louise and putting her hands back on the wheel just as the traffic started to inch forward.

  “Fantastic. Thanks, Casey.” The smile Louise gave Casey was returned. It was a smile Olivia hadn’t seen since the steak pudding.

  “I don’t think we should do that again.” Olivia found herself speaking, unable not to react. “I mean, it’s dangerous and Casey should be concentrating on the road. She’s our driver, Lou, not our tour guide.”

  “Exactly,” Liam muttered.

  Before Louise could respond, Casey spoke. “You’re right, Ms. Lang, that was irresponsible of me. I’m sorry. Won’t happen again.” This time her eyes didn’t search for Olivia’s in the mirror.

  “Tight-ass.” Louise kept her voice low, but the response was clearly audible to all of them.

  “I just—” Olivia started to respond but realized there was nothing she could say to defend herself. She was being snippy because she was stupidly jealous that Casey seemed to be finding Louise every bit as charming as she found Olivia annoying. She sat back in her seat and took in a breath, willing the embarrassment to fade.

  “You’re right, Lou. Liv has a nice tight ass. In fact, if I’m not mistaken, it was voted best ass on TV in 2019. I think you placed eleventh.” Liam put his hand over Olivia’s and squeezed. She appreciated the solidarity.

  “Get it right, I was tenth,” Louise replied. She waited for a beat. “Out of ten.”

  They all laughed and the tension was gone. It was impossible for them to stay mad at each other for long.

  So what if Louise wanted to flirt with Casey. And so what if Casey seemed to enjoy it. Olivia had no claim on either of them. Her absurd jealousy was something she was just going to have to swallow.

  * * *

  Casey was standing near the exit for the bridge at Embankment tube station as arranged, watching people teeming through the automatic barriers. David was late, like always, but Casey didn’t care. She was enjoying the people watching. Occasionally, someone would approach the barriers with no clue of how to navigate them, holding their ticket against the wrong part of the reader so that the gates wouldn’t open. Casey watched and winced, as even a moment’s hesitation caused a line of impatient travelers to build up.

  This had been her life for so long. In fact, that could easily have been Casey tutting and sighing behind some hapless tourist, rushing to some stressful home visit or other. Her job as a youth worker had seen her hurrying across east London from one broken home to another, from one school to another, to meet with the kids she had a responsibility to keep an eye on. It might have been stressful—and at times it was downright heartbreaking—but she had loved every minute of it. Every day, she’d felt like she was doing something righteous, something that mattered in the world. And it had mattered—until it was gone. Until it was taken from her. There was a tightness in her chest whenever she thought about it.

  Standing there waiting for David, she couldn’t imagine ever needing to be in such a hurry again, and she wasn’t sure whether to be happy or sad about it. Working with Gina was a lot of fun and it was a thousand times better than being a driver, but it didn’t fire her soul the way working with young people had. When she’d lost that job, Casey had felt the loss like a bereavement. It had hurt almost as much as Hannah’s betrayal. Being unable to follow through on the promises she’d made to some of the kids she’d worked with and not even having the chance to explain why had been the most painful thing of all.

  Casey caught sight of David coming through the barriers. Her mood lifted at the sight of him.

  “David.” Casey waved and shouted at the same time. He turned toward her and smiled, opening his arms for a hug.

  “I can’t believe they gave you an evening off. What are the lesbians doing without their driver?”

  “They’re not all lesbians.”

  “I know, but I feel like they’re the ones that are probably missing you the most.” He smiled.

  “They’re doing some interviews at the hotel and then one of those events with the fans. Nobody needs me or the car.”

  “Do the fans throw their underwear at them and ask them to sign their breasts?”

  “I have no idea. But I’m intrigued now about what kind of fan events you’ve been attending.”

  Casey tried to imagine Olivia being bombarded with panties and presented with breasts to sign. She couldn’t. She just seemed so buttoned up. Louise, on the other hand, probably had a special signature she used just for breasts. She couldn’t help but smile at the difference between them.

  The day they’d spent together had been fascinating. Olivia had such a disapproving older sister vibe. And Liam had been mad as hell with Louise for flirting with her. She wondered if Louise knew he had a thing for her. If she did, the blatant flirting was pretty cruel.

  “I’ve got us return tickets for the boat to Greenwich.” She pulled David toward the riverside exit.

  “Great.” He rolled his eyes.

  “Hey, I’ve been away a year and that qualifies me as a visitor, so I definitely get to do touristy things. You’ll enjoy it, and if you don’t, I’ll buy you fish and chips when we get to Greenwich.”

  “You just said the magic words.” David patted his stomach.

  * * *

  The boat was not as full as Casey had expected it to be, and she and David easily snagged a seat on the outside deck. Casey wanted to watch the bridges disappearing behind them one by one as they traveled eastward along the Thames. It was early evening but still pretty warm. As the boat pulled away from the pier and began to chug its way along to Waterloo Bridge, David turned in his seat to face her.

  “How’s it been going? Has it been manageable?”

  “Yeah, completely. A couple of early starts but nothing too bad. I thought I might find the driving a bit stressful after so long away from London, but it’s been fine. Wish I could say the same for the clients.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Nothing, not really. Some of them are nice, some of them are…” Casey was silent for a moment, watching the beautiful building that housed the Courtauld Gallery slide by. “I guess some of them are just living up to how I expected big shot TV actresses to behave.” She badly wanted to talk about Olivia, about how she was so hit-and-miss in the way she related to Casey and about how Casey got so foolishly tongue-tied in her presence. But she was far too embarrassed.

  “One of them—Olivia—seems like the biggest star. She certainly acts like she is, anyway. But the others are pretty friendly. A little too friendly perhaps.” She smiled, not able to take Louise’s advances seriously.

  “Don’t tell me they’re getting frisky with you. I knew you in that uniform would be hard to resist.” He lifted an eyebrow. “Just be careful, I don’t want any complaints about you breaking hearts.”

  “I’m not going to mess with the clients, and I’m not going to let them mess with me. I’m only here for a few weeks and I’m hoping to cut and run as soon as I can. And you know me, I’m not exactly the type to be interested in actresses from LA, even ones voted as having the best ass on TV.”

  There had been a moment, after she’d dropped them all off, when Casey was tempted to google it—to actually google Olivia’s award-winning ass—but she hadn’t. Louise had invited her to wait for them in the green room while they did the interview, but as hungry as she was, she said no. She had calls to make—to Jack, to her mom’s landlord, to the police—and she had read Olivia’s and Liam’s moods well enough to understand that whatever Louise was saying, neither of them were keen on her tagging along. She’d waited outsi
de, making her calls, reading her book and trying not to think about why Olivia Lang intrigued her so much.

  “Well, I think you should enjoy the attention while it’s on offer. You’ve been single for longer than I have.”

  Casey didn’t bother responding. She’d had the odd date in Portland—usually when she got tired of saying no to Gina’s efforts to set her up—but she didn’t see why she had to say that. She could be single for as long as she wanted. She had plenty of reasons to be.

  “I wasn’t sure whether to tell you and I don’t suppose it matters to you after all this time, but Hannah and Zoey got engaged.” David looked at Casey with eyes that were full of concern. Casey wondered if he thought the news would upset her. It was weird, but she couldn’t even decide if she cared.

  “Good for them. They deserve each other.”

  She obviously cared enough to still feel annoyed about it.

  “And of course, they’ve got some wedding video deal. A sponsor. A fat check. Hannah was all excited about it when they came over for dinner last week. You know what she’s like.”

  “I do.”

  There was a lot more Casey could have said, but she didn’t want to. It was awkward enough for David trying to maintain a friendship with them both.

  “I’m just telling you so you’re prepared. They’ll be at the party. I can’t believe she won’t flaunt it. She knows you’re here and that you’re coming. She was asking a lot of questions, talking about how good it would be to see you, how she hadn’t wanted things between you to end as badly as they had. If she wasn’t Hannah, you might even have imagined some actual regret in there.”

  “She cheated on me, got me arrested, cost me my job, and then told everyone it was my fault because I was a nightmare of a girlfriend who’d tried to ruin her career. I’m not sure there’s a way back from that.” Even now, being reminded of it was hard. “I know I did some stuff I shouldn’t have when I found out about her cheating, but I didn’t deserve what she did to me.”

  “She behaved badly. I think deep down she knows that. It’s been hard for me to forgive her too, but it was a long time ago. You’ve both moved on.”

 

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