by Anna Craig
Howling in utter rage, Trevor shifted and bolted on four paws down the hallway for the freedom of the land outside. He sensed the entire pack, scattered throughout or nearby the sprawling estate, hold their collective breath as their alpha voiced his rage.
His fear. Fucking spineless, weak, useless fear.
Trevor burst out into the night, unsure whether he was chasing his fear or it was chasing him.
~~~
Cassie barreled down the hallway, her ears still ringing with the echoes of her mate's enraged cries. She skidded on the floor as she rounded a corner, but picked up speed again as she loped downstairs. He wasn't getting away with calling all the shots anymore.
What was the use in being a kick-ass female alpha wolf if her mate wouldn't allow her to behave like one? And if he would not soften enough to really let her in. The faint shadow of a mysterious, lost something she'd seen in him from almost the very moment they met, the little hints that beneath his control, the pain hidden deep within him—no. She wasn't going to them go anymore. He was going to tell her what the hell was going on, or else.
Dang it.
Rounding another corner, Cassie almost skidded directly into three people huddled in a small knot. They stepped back and let her slide on the floor, but one shot out her hand to grab her golden fur, stopping her.
Cassie growled, then swallowed it with an apologetic sound when she realized it was Tamsin, shaking her head.
And Finn and Mac, her two almost-onetime lovers. She hadn't seen them once since she'd first been surrendered to the pack. Still huge and gorgeous—though truly nowhere near as gorgeous as Trevor, not that she was biased or anything—the one still dark and dreamy, the other still light and cheerful. Regardless, she felt absolutely zero attraction to either one. She had found her mate, and no others could hold a candle to him. Whatever that phrase meant, anyway.
“Hold on,” Tamsin started to say, the same moment Finn said, “What's your rush, lovely Cassandra? Can't even stop to say hello to two old friends?”
He awarded her a slow, molten smile she was sure would have burned off her panties had she never met Trevor. Now, Finn's smile did nothing more than vaguely make her think, That's nice, dear. Even so, despite her urgency to reach Trevor, Cassie cocked her head and simply gave Finn a quizzical look. Really, she wouldn't say they were friends, it was more like they'd been—that is....
Mac laughed, a rich sound that dispelled the echoes of Trevor's fierce howls. “The look on your face is priceless right about now.”
Finn still smiled at her, his gaze also fascinated. “And look at you. From meek human surrender to this magnificent wolf.”
Also smiling, Mac said, “Apparently we missed the action earlier today. Tamsin was just telling us how amazing it was.”
“Where have you two been?” Cassie asked, knowing they could understand her despite the fact they were all in human shape.
“We had a mighty mission to accomplish.” Finn wagged his dark brows and tried to look mysterious.
Tamsin clarified with the tiniest roll of her expressive eyes, “The alpha sent them away to visit another pack after the claiming ceremony. He wanted to be certain they stopped thinking about you.”
Mac's laughter echoed down the hallway again. “He wanted to make sure we sowed some wild oats far away from his new mate, whom we'd just been about to—oof,” he ended with a grunt. Tamsin had elbowed him, kind of hard.
“You don't speak like that about the alpha's mate. Ever again.” All traces of playfulness were gone from Tamsin's face.
She looked at Mac with such a ferocious expression Cassie felt the nape of her neck ruff up. Mac immediately dropped his eyes as well as his grin. Finn looked anywhere but Cassie.
Well, then. She'd known Tamsin was an alpha female who ranked very high in the pack. But to see it in action was another thing. To watch other wolves, male wolves, instantly respond to her power almost like they did to Trevor, was very interesting.
Cassie looked at Tamsin in a new way, too. Not submissive—no, she recognized that she ranked above Tamsin now—but with a respect deeper than the sisterly kind of bond they'd pretty much established from the beginning.
“Wow, Tamsin,” she heard herself say. “You're a pretty tough chick.”
Three pairs of eyes swiveled toward her. Hmm. Even in wolf form, some of her human silliness seemed to leak through when she wasn't battling for her life. Perhaps this meant her sides were starting to integrate themselves.
Then Tamsin snorted, sounding very much like her brother having a sarcastic moment. “Yes. The females in this pack must be tough,” she said. More quietly, she added, “Just like you are. As you proved earlier.”
Right. Shaking her head at that still-awesome thought, Cassie said to Mac and Finn, “Look, it's good to see the two of you. I'm glad you're back. Um...did any of you see Trevor just a moment ago?”
Silently, Mac and Finn looked at Tamsin. Tamsin sighed, then nodded at the two male wolves, motioning them away with a no-nonsense gesture. Gorgeous Finn blew a kiss at Cassie, winking with exaggerated effect. Charming Mac gave her a jaunty salute, and the two moved off down the hall. Looking after them, Cassie charitably thought to herself that they would make some lucky women quite happy one day. Then she returned her thoughts to the most pressing thing on her mind.
“Tamsin, please tell me what's going on? He won't tell me, but I know there's something wrong. Very wrong.”
Tamsin looked uneasy and conflicted all at once. Her violet eyes darkened as something like sadness flashed over her face. But she shook her head. “I can't tell you.”
Cassie narrowed her eyes at Tamsin, who didn't seem phased by it at all. Alpha female. Right.
“Can't tell me, or won't?” Despite being a kind of fierce wolf, Cassie suddenly felt like stomping her foot. Paw. Whatever.
Sighing, Tamsin said, “I can't. Literally. The alpha commanded me to not tell you. No one here can talk about it. They all know better.” She looked toward the direction Cassie knew the alpha had run, her lips twisted in what seemed to be pain. Looking back at Cassie, she carefully whispered, “He—wants to leave the past in the past, yet without acknowledging it ever happened. I have never been able to convince him he must confront it if it is to ever let him go. It is killing him. Slowly, but it is indeed destroying the man he truly should be. He does not need to hide everything.” She stopped short, almost as if she'd clapped her own hand over her mouth. By her expression, she wanted to say more, but literally couldn't.
The power an alpha held over his pack was seriously impressive.
Something nervous scurried along Cassie's spine under her coat. “The past? Please, Tamsin. Why did he just run from me?”
Even she could hear the little wobble in her deep wolf voice. Awesome.
Shaking her head in resignation, Tamsin said, “I cannot say any more. You must get him to tell you why. Make him listen to you, as his mate,” she said more fiercely. Then, softer, she added, “If this pack is going to keep its alpha, he needs to share it with not only you, but himself. Otherwise...”
She hesitated for so long Cassie thought she might bust out of her skin with the suspense.
What was it with these wolves and all their secrets, and politics, and just things nobody would tell her? Wasn't she one of them now?
“Otherwise? Otherwise what?” she finally said, actually leaning toward Tamsin in hushed expectation.
Tamsin answered very quietly. “Otherwise I think Thayne and Aliana might as well have succeeded in their plans, because we'll lose our alpha anyway. I hoped he would be made stronger by your presence. He has, but I see something in him that he hasn't dealt with yet. It's going to kill him if he can't break through.” She looked Cassie square in the eyes, the intensity behind her words leaping across as if over a live wire. “And because he's an alpha male, through and through, he simply will not acknowledge that his heart must open to you completely. We need our alpha to be whole, Cassandra. You hold t
he key to that now.”
Feeling dread abruptly quake its way through her body, Cassie stood motionless for a long moment as she tried to understand everything Tamsin was saying without really saying. She only moved when Tamsin put her hands on Cassie's strong wolf shoulder and pushed her.
“Go. Go find him. Make him tell you. It's past time.” The fierceness in her voice again made Cassie's spine stiffen in determination. “You are making him feel again, Cassie,” she said in a low voice, looking behind her as if she expected Trevor to burst out and scold her. “Trust me when I say he needs that far more than you can know. Don't let him stop again, Cassandra.”
To hear Tamsin using Cassie's full name was enough to spur Cassie into action again. Yes. It was about damn time her mate stopped hiding whatever the hell it was he was hiding, because she really hadn't gone through every single crazy thing she'd gone through only to be met with the Blank Staring Face of Mr. Granite Man again.
And, she thought with a hard swallow, while she didn't know what Tamsin meant when she said the pack might lose its alpha, she would do every darn thing in her power to make sure that didn't happen.
Leaping down the corridor, she headed for the woods after her gorgeous, apparently tortured mate.
Chapter 7
Trevor crashed almost blindly through the forest, although his steps were as quiet and stealthy as ever. Even in this state, he could not overcome a lifetime of training.
Whatever in the damned fucking hell “this state” meant. He had a good idea, though, and he wanted no part of it. Flashes of a laughing dark-haired woman scampered through his mind, along with a stunning blonde woman shifting into a magnificent golden wolf before his eyes. The two merged into one as he ran. No matter how fast he ran, he could not outpace them. Relentless, they stayed with him, tormenting his mind. Fear, loss, and fury mingled together in an eruption so confusing all he could do to escape it was run.
His fine, logical alpha's mind, melting down into a puddle of idiotic feelings. Snarling at himself, Trevor stretched out to his full pace, effortlessly weaving through the trees and ducking low-lying branches. The coolness of the forest at night surrounded him, as did the primitive, shivering scents as he tore ever deeper into it. Wild and soothing all at once, it seemed like the woods welcomed him, just as earlier they had welcomed his mate on her first run.
His mate. Cassandra. His beautiful, strong, courageous wolf mate.
The one he had just slunk away from, like a cowardly omega wolf at the bottom of the hierarchy.
Shame, fear, and the other emotions that had stunned him the other day slammed into him again, full force. Almost whining from the onslaught, he forced himself on. His loping stride ate up tremendous distances, hurtling him farther and farther from the estate.
Farther from Cassandra. Her crystal blue eyes, clearly hurt and also angry from the suddenness of his departure, stayed with him as he ran.
My love.
The words whispered through his head again. My love.
Trevor threw back his head and loosed a howl out into the late night air. The sound of it lifted above the trees, high, lonesome, and lingering.
Again and again, he cried out, furiously unsure of why he so desperately needed to speak.
~~~
Cassie bounded through the woods. It felt different than the run earlier. Then, she had felt in control, strong, and absolutely crazy excited about her new shape.
Now, she felt nothing but an urgent drive to find her mate. Whatever was going on with him, Tamsin had scared her about it. She needed to find him, to make sure he was okay.
She also basically needed to thump him for being such a guy. Locking her in the room for some pig-headed, old-fashioned, stubborn-ass reason. Hmph.
Soaring over a mossy log, she landed on the other side on almost silent paws. Cool. Really cool. The fact that she could run like the wind was also pretty awesome. And her nose was amazing. She was following Trevor's scent like it hung on the air, leading her straight to him.
Just then, an enormous howl shattered the night. Cassie skidded to a halt, every hackle on her body standing at attention.
Again, the alpha of the pack howled. And again. And once more.
Sadness knifed through his voice. Sadness, confused rage, and pain. Definitely pain.
Shooting off again into the dark, Cassie ran faster.
“You don't get to hide anymore, you big badass,” she muttered to herself as she raced deeper into the forest. Her voice came out as a whiny bark, which made her almost laugh. Almost.
Scraping between two huge pine trees that sort of smelled like butterscotch, she ducked through a thicket of ferns. Their large fronds whipped in the breeze she left as she plunged through them. Legs churning in almost tireless motion despite the insane stuff she'd been through so far today, Cassie felt incredibly powerful and free as she ran.
The only thing that kept her from fully reveling in the experience was the empty sound of her mate's howls as they ripped through her heart. Being a wolf was fucking fantastic, yeah. Being a wolf with an unhappy mate who refused to tell her what the hell was up? Nope. She didn't want to do this wolf thing without him. She needed him, dammit. She needed her mate.
Trevor's howls grew louder. She had to be close now.
So close, in fact, that she startled herself when she busted through another swaying cluster of ferns and tumbled into a small glade, lit by the moon. Shadows and silvery light mixed together in the scene, but all Cassie could focus on was the big, black wolf sitting right in the middle of it, nose pointed to the sky, howling.
Her gorgeous, stunning, totally bewildering wolf mate.
~~~
Trevor almost choked on his own howl when Cassandra exploded into the clearing. He immediately turned toward her, snarling in his shock.
“I told you to stay inside! Who let you out?”
He advanced a step toward her, glaring. Knowing full well he was posturing to cover the way his heart had jolted at her appearance, not to mention that she'd caught him howling like an unsettled, scared little pup. Even so, he still couldn't help but admire the grace and power flooding off his once-human mate.
She truly was magnificent, beautiful—and his. His to protect.
The thought lodged more terror in his chest, much to his utter fury.
His lovely mate, who apparently was still just as sassy in her wolf form as in her human, said with a small huff, “Nobody let me out. I let myself out, thank you very much. Oh, and by the way,” she added, looking quite pleased with herself, “we'll need a new door for our room. I do believe I broke it down.”
Trevor pricked his ears straight up as he stared at her in even more shock. Who was this little she-devil loosed upon the world?
It seemed he had created a saucy, sexy, irresistible monster.
Cassandra abruptly shook her head. If a wolf could roll her eyes, she would have. Instead, from one heartbeat to the next, she shifted back to human.
“You,” she said, pointing at him, advancing on him, “are going to talk to me.” She stopped a scant foot away from him, narrowing her beautiful eyes. Angry sparks virtually scattered off her.
Trevor growled at her words. That was such a female thing to say. And never a good thing.
Ignoring the fact he was a huge, snarling wolf, his mate said in a high-handed voice, “Trevor Reginald, as your mate, I command you to talk to me.”
Trevor's fur ridged up along his back in more shock. She was resolute. Uncompromising. Nothing at all like the unbearably sexy yet very nervous young woman he had first met. No, this was a woman knew exactly what she wanted. Clearly, she intended to get it, one way or another. With her hair streaming over her shoulders and down her back in a wild, tangled golden mess, her lush body planted firmly on the ground, hands settled on her gorgeous, full hips, chin tilted up with stony determination, Cassandra looked every inch an alpha female in this form.
Most definitely the mate of the alpha of the pack.
Something still frantic to escape flung itself about in him. Voice thunderous in his desperation, he said, “You command me? I am your alpha! Especially now that you have become a shifter. You,” he pointed at her, holding onto his false anger like an anchor, “shall listen to me.”
His incredible mate didn't even look at the ground. Instead, she locked her determined eyes with his astonished ones and matched him glare for glare.
“Oh, really?” Her voice was pitched high and getting higher every second. “That's how it is? We're back to Yes, sir, No, sir, Whatever you say, sir? Too bad! No fucking way, o high and mighty sir.”
Her chest heaved in the most distracting way as she yelled, her face becoming a sweet shade of red as she reached up to thump his chest with an enraged finger.
“Refuse? You cannot refuse me. Not as your alpha and your mate.” He forced himself to glare at the delicious woman, standing there before him in all her glorious curves and irrepressible spirit. The one he was sworn to protect now and forevermore.
Perhaps, he mused, still frantically searching for a way to regain his usual steadfast equilibrium, he should just bite her again, the bite of an alpha male letting his female know he was the stronger. The one in charge. Always in control. The one responsible for the safety of all his wolves. Especially his very own mate.
Jagged pain struck at his heart again, images flashing through his mind as fear kicked him, hard, in the gut. Voice booming with his own helpless rage at himself, he said, “I told you to stay in there for your own safety, Cassandra. You do not—”
“My safety?” the little wench interrupted him, eyes flashing in the moonlight. He could smell the sweetness of her body, the delectable offerings within its softness. “I'm a wolf now, o master and lord! I can keep myself safe, thank you very much! I proved that today, didn't I? So there's no point in locking me up.”
