“No, not really. I’m just going to talk to people about their lives. I’m going to be a social worker in a few months.”
“So you want to spend time at the zoo talking to the animals?” Riker asked angrily. “These people are projects for you to learn from. Is that it?”
“That’s not what I meant,” I pleaded. “I just want to find out why people are here and how they turned their lives around.”
“Most of these people haven’t turned their lives around. That’s why they’re here and not at one of those nice fancy gyms down the road.”
“Look, I just want to help. Is that so bad?”
“You don’t want to help,” Riker snapped. “You want to feel better about yourself.”
Making myself feel better had nothing to do with it, but I did have a selfish motivation. Mom had dedicated her life to helping others as a criminal defense attorney, and I wanted to make her proud of me. I could earn more money in the private sector, and maybe that would make me happy, but I knew in the long run that wouldn’t give me any true satisfaction.
Mom had enjoyed her work. It had been tiring and stressful, but she wouldn’t have changed it for the world. I wanted to find a similar passion. Mom had done her best to help poor people find some justice through the legal system. I wanted to make sure they never got into the legal system in the first place.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said eventually, although my hesitation likely gave away how close he was to being right. “You can’t hate everyone who wants to help.”
“We’ve had people like you in here before, you know?” Riker said. “People have tried to ‘save me’ from what I do. No one here needs your help.”
“I have no intention of doing that,” I said firmly. “Clearly you’re beyond saving.”
“Whatever. Just stay the hell out of my way.”
Riker turned and stormed out of the office, but if he thought he was going to get the last word in, he had another thing coming.
“Why are you teaching?” I yelled out after him.
He stopped and turned back to face me. “What?”
“Duke told me you’re teaching people combat today. Why are you doing that?”
“The same reason I do everything—money.”
“Not to help people and repay your debt to society?”
“I spent five years in prison,” he replied. “I’ve already repaid my debt to society.”
“Okay, well maybe I’m doing this for the money as well. Does that make you feel better?”
“You don’t know what it’s like to truly need money. Besides, I’m sure you have a fat inheritance to live off now.”
I stared wide-eyed at him. “Please tell me you didn’t just use my mom’s death to prove a fucking point?”
Riker shook his head. “No, I didn’t mean… whatever. Just keep out of my way.”
He stormed off again and this time I didn’t attempt to get the last word. I hated to admit it, but he’d got a reaction from me. Had I really chosen my future career just so I could walk around feeling proud of myself?
Worse still, if that’s the reaction Riker had to me, what would everyone else think? I wouldn’t be much of a social worker if I couldn’t connect to any of my clients. I thought hanging out here for a few months would do some good, but I stood out like a sore thumb among all the muscle-bound men and women here.
I had to at least try. Mom would have never backed down so quickly. Besides, there were worse places to spend the day. At least I’d be in tip-top shape by the time I started my new job. And if it all went badly, there was still time to let Child Welfare Services know that this whole thing had been a big mistake.
I headed to the exit and did my best not to look at Riker as I walked past. He was in the far corner setting up the space for his first combat class. I shouldn’t have expected much from him. He was a convict and fighter. Hardly an upstanding member of society.
Part of my body didn’t agree with my brain’s rationalization. In one way, Riker was every bit the man I wanted right now.
One thing was for sure, I would have to stay out of his way like he’d asked. For both our sakes.
Nora did exactly as I’d asked. She kept out of my way.
Not that I blamed her after what I said about living off an inheritance. That was a shitty thing to say to someone who’d lost her mom. She’d just riled me up with talk of hanging around and watching people train.
I hadn’t meant to turn on her that quickly. I’d gone from wanting to screw her again, to not wanting to be anywhere near her in the space of a few seconds. She’d pressed buttons that were better left untouched.
I had experience with social workers. We’d been through a fair few in my family growing up. A couple had made a genuine effort at helping, but the rest were more concerned with their own careers than actually making a difference. They wanted to help, unless it meant actually coming down into the rough part of town and showing their faces. Then they were suddenly nowhere to be found.
Nora probably wasn’t like that. In fact, she definitely wasn’t like that. She’d been here every day for the past week, showing up at seven in the morning and not leaving until the evening.
Duke loved having her around, and the two of them talked whenever he had a free moment. I had no idea what they found to talk about other than Nora’s mom, but there was rarely a quiet moment between them.
When Nora wasn’t talking to Duke, she was chatting with the other members at the gym, including one of my sparring partners Mike and, more awkwardly, a few of the women I’d hooked up with here. I kept a particular eye on those conversations.
Occasionally I spoke to the other guys and asked them what they thought about Nora. They all liked her. None of them had a problem being gawked at by some college graduate who’d probably never so much as gotten detention let alone a prison sentence.
I’m sure it didn’t do any harm that she was cute as hell. When she smiled, you couldn’t help but smile back. I saw the toughest, hardest men I knew break out into big child-like grins when talking to her. She had them eating out of the palm of her hand in minutes.
One guy told me that he’d spilled all the details about his arrest to her—details he hadn’t told anyone else at the gym—after just an hour talking to her. I could see why. Her eyes told you she could be trusted. Even from across the room I could see it.
Nothing she’d done in the past week had justified my anger towards her. I already regretted it, but apologizing wasn’t exactly one of the skills I’d picked up in prison. Besides, even though I was cold towards Nora, that was nothing compared to the grief she got from Gayle on a regular basis.
Gayle found any excuse to have a go at Nora. If Nora left an empty plastic cup of water around for even a second, Gayle was on her like a shot. If Duke and Nora spoke for too long, Gayle would find a reason to break them up. It was obvious and painful to watch.
I did sympathize with Gayle, and hated seeing her torturing herself like that, but there wasn’t anything I could do to help. Despite having an eventful sexual history of her own, Gayle tended to get insanely jealous when it came to women from Duke’s past. I’m sure she hated having a constant reminder of Duke’s former lover around the gym every day.
Eventually Gayle snapped.
I didn’t see what caused the argument, but it was almost certainly something minor. I came up from a set of chest presses and saw Gayle laying into Nora and pointing her towards the exit.
I took my headphones off and walked slowly over towards them. I didn’t want to get involved, but Gayle was stronger than many of the men here, and Nora was tiny. It would be like me going up against… well, pretty much any other man really. Not a fair fight.
“It’s about time you left,” Gayle yelled. “I’m sick and tired of you hanging around here all day. Go and conduct your research project at a coffee shop like everyone else your age.”
“Duke said I could be here,” Nora replied. Sh
e spoke quietly but with conviction, and her body language suggested she wouldn’t back down quickly. That could be dangerous.
“Well I’m saying you can’t. You’ve been here for a week already, gawking at everyone like they were animals in a fucking zoo.”
I cringed as I heard Gayle use the same words I had last week. Had they sounded that cruel when I’d said them as well? No wonder Nora hadn’t come near me all week.
“No one else seems to mind,” Nora insisted. “I’m not getting in anyone’s way.”
“I mind, and you’re getting in my way,” Gayle snapped.
“Look, if Duke asks me to leave, then I will leave, but otherwise I’m staying put.”
A few seconds of silence fell between them, but neither woman looked away. This would be the perfect opportunity for me to break the two of them up, but if I did that then they’d just end up in the same fight later when I wasn’t around. Probably best to let them have it out.
“What are you even hoping to accomplish out of all this?” Gayle asked. “Do you just want to go around bragging about how the rich girl spent time slumming it in a rough neighborhood?”
Nora might not fit in around here, but I wouldn’t have described her as rich either. Rich people didn’t know how to fit in around men like me. Nora had managed that just fine. She might be well-spoken, but she was genuine with everyone. Gayle would be able to see that if she didn’t hate the idea of Nora’s mere existence.
“This is far from my first time in a rough neighborhood,” Nora replied. “Mom was a public defender. I spent half my childhood in places like this because she had to take me with her to see clients. I just want to get to know the people here. Is that so hard to believe?”
“Duke?” Gayle asked. “That’s who you want to get to know, isn’t it?”
Nora looked like she was about to deny it, but instead her shoulders slumped down slightly and she sighed quietly.
“Fine, yes. I would like to get to know my father a bit better. Happy now?”
Nora didn’t give Gayle a chance to respond. She stormed off in the direction of the changing rooms, walking past me without so much as a second glance, and came out a few minutes later with her bag.
“You’re leaving?” Gayle asked, as Nora walked past her.
“Yep,” Nora replied. Gayle had gotten what she wanted, but she didn’t look happy about it. Nora stopped in the doorway, and turned back to face Gayle. “See you tomorrow,” she called out. A few of people behind me waved her off. She’d made friends with almost everyone here already. Quite the achievement.
Gayle wouldn’t cause any more problems. Whatever it was bothering her, she’d gotten it off her chest, and she now knew Nora wasn’t a pushover. Gayle couldn’t help but respect that, at least.
And neither could I.
I had judged her based on stereotypes of what a lawyer’s daughter would be like, even though I was quick to criticize when people did that with me.
Gayle was my fight promoter, and she ran this place in Duke’s absence. She wasn’t a woman to be taken lightly, but Nora hadn’t been at all fazed by her. Not outwardly at least. I suspected that she was a little shaken up by the whole thing, which was why she headed home early, but she still put up a good fight.
I could apologize to her tomorrow morning. Then I could be the one talking to her for hours on end when I was supposed to be training.
That was an awful idea on so many levels. Any distractions from training were to be avoided, but then she’d been distracting me anyway just by being around the gym. Mostly, it had been a positive distraction. I’d been lifting more these last few days, and I hadn’t felt this good physically in a long time. Mentally, though, I was all over the place and that was largely due to Nora.
Then there was Duke. My boss and mentor. What the hell would he say if I started fooling around with his daughter? Again. My body wanted her, and it usually got what it wanted when it came to women.
No, I had to keep my distance. I wouldn’t apologize for what I said, and I wouldn’t make an effort to talk to her. She’d be gone in a few weeks or so, and then I could get back to focusing on the fight.
Many good fighters had lost their way because of a beautiful woman. I couldn’t let that happen to me. I had a fight to win.
I was still shaking when I got home. That was the closest I’d been to getting in a fight since Natalie stole my lunch in third grade. For Gayle, that probably wasn’t the first fight she’d had this week.
I’d grabbed my things from the locker room with the intention of never coming back, but when Gayle asked me if I was leaving, I knew I couldn’t let her win. Not that easily, anyway. I’d made the snap decision to go back tomorrow, but I wouldn’t be able to stay there all summer.
I woke up the next morning with every intention of leaving at the end of the week. I could keep some dignity, but still get the hell out of there before Gayle killed me.
Gayle messed all that up by being nice to me the next day. Apparently bullies really did respect you more if you stood up to them. I’d always assumed that was an old wives’ tale.
Gayle made it clear I could treat the gym as if it were my own, and she even started introducing me to people she thought I would want to speak to.
I still had to leave soon. Someone had me scared and it wasn’t Gayle.
The more time I spent here, the more I found myself watching Riker training. My body was doing it without my brain even being aware of it. Whenever I sat down, I conveniently sat somewhere in line of sight of whichever bench or workout station he was using at the time.
Watching his muscles bulge and pulse as he lifted weights was hard enough to look away from, but the real soul crushing moments were when he was helping others.
Women were always asking Riker to spot for them, which meant he spent half his time perched over them with his huge legs straddling their faces. What I wouldn’t give to get that up close and personal with the insides of his thighs.
Then there were the combat classes he taught. The first few had been quiet, with only a handful showing up, mostly men. Then word must have gotten around, because suddenly he had a class of twenty, and a good two-thirds of them were women. Toned, athletic women who apparently thought combat attire included low cut tops and loads of make up.
The women often seemed to have difficulty with the most basic of moves, and would call over Riker for some up close and personal instruction during and after class. I didn’t know whether to hate them for being so pathetically obvious, or hate myself for not thinking of it first.
Worst of all, my feelings were easily read by everyone I spoke to at the gym. Alonso sat with me and explained how he’d ended up in prison by defending himself in a fight after a few guys decided they didn’t want a gay guy in their bar. I must have been checking Riker out while he spoke, because at the end of the conversation Alonso offered to put in a good word for me.
I didn’t like this side of me. It felt unprofessional. I’d made it the entire way through college without mindlessly lusting after men, so I could manage a few more months.
I couldn’t even justify this as a social experiment anymore. Most of the time, I just sat around talking to Duke and the other regulars. I’d enjoyed finding out their backstories, but after that it felt like we were just hanging out.
“You alright?” Duke asked as he sat down next to me on one of the workout benches. “You look a little bored.”
“I’m fine,” I replied.
I wasn’t looking forward to breaking the news to Duke that I wouldn’t be coming by so often. He was bound to take it personally, and I didn’t want him to think I’d grown bored of my father after just a week.
“Want to get stuck in?” Duke asked, as he motioned to some of the nearby dumbbells. “I’ll spot you if you like.”
“No, that’s okay. I’m so weak and feeble compared to everyone else here. You probably don’t have any weights I can lift.”
“Nonsense. I’m sure you can ho
ld your own. You should take the opportunity to work out more though. There’s not much point hanging around a gym all day if you’re not going to get in shape.”
I had been ridiculously lazy. Every morning I got changed into gym clothes, but compared to everyone else here my workouts were tame. Some time on the exercise bike, and a few small weights were about the limit of it.
“I was actually thinking about not coming in so much anymore,” I said, looking away from Duke in case I saw disappointment in his eyes.
“Oh,” Duke said softly. “That’s a shame. I’d kind of gotten used to having you around.”
“I think I might have overstayed my welcome. And you’re right. I need to be a bit more productive. Can’t just sit around here all summer.”
“How about you spend the summer learning a new skill? One that will set you up for the rest of your life.”
I frowned and looked at Duke curiously. He looked excited to tell me something, like a kid who couldn’t keep a secret.
“I’ve just finished a college degree. I need a break from studying.”
“This is better than any college degree, and you won’t be stuck in the library reading books.”
“Okay, I’m intrigued,” I admitted. “What do you have in mind?”
“I run a gym and a fight club. I wouldn’t be much of a father if I didn’t teach my daughter how to look after herself.”
That was the first time Duke had referred to me as his daughter since he introduced me to Riker and Gayle. He might have done it deliberately to get me to go along with his idea, but I didn’t think he was that devious.
We’d gotten close over the last week, and while we were a long way from being a proper father and daughter, our relationship was already stronger than I thought it ever would be.
“You want to teach me to fight?” I asked.
Duke laughed. “No, not me personally. I’m too old for that shit. You could probably kick my ass already, and if not all you’d have to do is run away. I’m not too quick on my feet these days.”
Women grunted at the far end of the gym as they threw punches into pads Riker held in each hand. I had an awful idea I knew exactly what Duke had in mind.
Bad Boy's Honor: An MMA Bad Boy Romance Page 6
