by Freya Barker
He barks out a laugh. "Questions? I may have a few. As soon as I figure out how to ask them."
"Why don't I tell you from the start what we've been up to."
"We?"
"Yes. We. Found out I couldn't do this alone so I called in some help."
I watch in amusement as his eyebrows disappear up into his hairline.
"Help? You asked for help? Pigs must be flying."
"Haha, smartass." I smile at him a little nervously, not quite so sure now he would welcome my interference.
"If I had to be away from you for any stretch of time, it would be hard. When I hear you talking to Faith on the phone I can hear the pain in your voice and I hate it. So I wanted to help, but I wasn't sure how and I couldn't do anything as long as things weren't settled here at home."
When the flight attendant comes by with drinks on offer, Seb waves her away impatiently, urging me to go on.
"I talked to Janet a few times." I confessed, waiting for his reaction.
"Janet? Faith's caregiver? How… "
"Got the number from your phone. I told her I wanted to find a way to make your reunion with your sister happen sooner than later and she was ecstatic. Said that it would be the best thing for Faith, since her nightmares had just been getting worse and she thought being away from you for so long seems to make things harder and not easier as time goes by. We talked a bit about Faith's needs and what kinds of facilities you had looked at here. We made some phone calls to see about placement."
Having two seats all to ourselves, with no one next to us, Seb flips up the armrest between us and pulls me on his lap.
"I love you for wanting to do this for me, Spot. So much it almost hurts, but the placements here are more costly, I already looked into that. I'm saving up, which is why I haven't been to see her much and I've been told it would be another six months at least, before they might have a spot for her."
It kills me to see the dejected look on his face.
"I know. I've been told, but here's the thing… The money? What you were paying me for rent, you no longer owe me." I have to put my hand on his mouth to stop him from interrupting me. "Hear me out, please. You can stay with me. Janet wants to come and see Faith settled in. Plans to stay for a month at least to make transition easier, maybe longer. Says she wants a change of scenery. Gus and Emma are offering their guesthouse for them to stay or just Janet, if Faith would prefer to stay with us. It's being finished this weekend for them. It's all one level and has easy access; all done for Emma's benefit, but it would work for Faith as well. Are you still with me?"
Swallowing hard, he nods. "Just processing here… Where will Caleb and the other guys stay when they're in town?"
"That's the beauty of it. Caleb has an out of town job as of Monday and he will spend the last night here at the motel, but after that the apartment over the diner should be ready. With two bedrooms." I smile triumphantly.
"You have really been working this to the bone, haven't you?" His arms tighten around me and he looks at me with amazement written on his face.
"We will all help out and when Janet decides to move on, if a spot hasn't opened up for Faith yet by then, we’ve got it figured out, but we can do this - as the big messy family that we are. Don't you think?"
His jaw clenches and I am losing my steam. I still don't know if I've done good, or overstepped. He wraps me up tightly in his arms and buries his face in my neck, holding on for dear life. Stroking his back I feel a shudder run through him and in a breaking voice he says, "You are the light at the end of my tunnel, Spot."
And I cling to him and smile. Big.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
The state facility in Billings, Montana, where Faith has been living the last five years or so, has the look of an old penitentiary. Steel bars cover every visible window and the old brick facade is a testimony to harsher times. Hard to believe this is a place where people are being cared for, but I hope looks are deceiving.
Seb's hand in mine is tensing as we walk up the wide steps to the front doors.
"You okay?" I ask, squeezing his hand lightly.
"Anxious to see her, is all," is his gruff reply.
He hasn't said much the entire way from the airport here, and I haven't pushed him. I understand the need to process things at your own pace when you are thrown in the deep end so to speak, especially when it deals with things that are close to the heart. I know I've probably breached his comfort zone in terms of involvement, but I want him to know that as much as I accept him as part of my life, my future, he can and should do the same with me. Still, a man who has probably talked and shared more in the past few weeks than I imagine he ever has deserves some time to catch his breath.
A friendly brunette with big horn-rimmed glasses and a huge smile opens the door only moments after we ring the bell.
"You're here! I'm so excited." Throwing her arms around Seb she gives him a resounding kiss on the cheek. I reluctantly let go of his hand and step to the side. "And you… You must be Arlene. I can't tell you how good it is to meet you face to face." She promptly envelops me into a big hug as well.
This must be Janet I realize, and recalling the frequent friendly phone calls we've shared over the past weeks, I give the woman a firm hug back. "So glad to meet you."
"Janet." Seb smiles at her, and then me, with a little wink thrown in.
The bubbly woman pulls us inside while chattering on about how excited Faith has been since finding out this morning that her big brother was coming. Janet had chosen not to tell her before, since length of time was a difficult concept for Faith and having her wait too long would take the fun out of the anticipation.
"She's been making drawings all morning, Seb. Happy ones this time. You'd better get an extra suitcase to take those all back with you." She looks at Seb with a questioning glance.
"Hoping to take the artist back too, Janet. And a certain someone who needs a holiday?"
"Woot! You told him!" She grins at me. "I wasn't sure how you were going to play this and I didn't want to get my hopes up but; Yay!"
Almost skipping down the huge gloomy hallway, the short bouncy woman looks way too happy for a place like this.
"My bags are packed. I did it just in case and I have a potential sub-let on my apartment all lined up. I am so ready for an adventure, you have no idea." Janet waves her arms around as she talks, using her entire body to emphasize her words. She is one bundle of energy.
"Go on, go in. She’s expecting you." Janet opens the door and urges us inside, but I stop on the threshold.
"I think I'm going to give them some time." I look at Seb taking three big strides into the room, covered wall to wall with brightly colored pictures almost all depicting a large man, holding the hand of a little girl. There sitting in the wheelchair by the barred window is a gorgeous woman with long braids in her hair and a happy smile on her face, so far from the little girl in the drawings. Without hesitation, Seb lifts his sister out of her chair and swings her around, making her squeal.
"Are you okay, love?" Janet asks when she sees the wetness on my cheeks. "Come on, let's get a coffee." Not bothering to wait for my answer, she hooks her arm in mine and leads me to a little office at the end of the hall.
God I've missed her. The way she clings to me like a monkey and laughs her little girl laugh.
"Sebastian!"
I bury my nose in her braids and inhale deeply as I swing her around. She always smells of lavender, her favorite scent. Janet always massages her useless muscles with some lotion that smells like that.
"Hey, pumpkin. I'm so happy to see you."
"Me too! I've waited so long." That sets Faith off babbling about her drawings and the friends she's made with a squirrel in the vegetable garden out back and all I can do is smile until my face starts hurting.
"How come you're crying, Sebastian? Are you sad?"
Startled, I put my fingers to my cheek and bring them away wet.
"No honey, I'm happy.
Very happy. Do you want to know why?"
Sitting in her wheelchair, a gorgeous woman with the mind of a little girl nods her head enthusiastically.
"I have a friend, a really good friend I would like you to meet."
"Yeah? Where?" Faith looks at the door suspiciously.
"She's just gone with Janet for a minute but she’ll be right back."
"Will she like me?"
Fuck, the girl breaks my heart when she looks at me like I have all the answers in the world. I will never be able to live up to that. I stroke my hand over her cheek. "She will love you, just like I do."
Arlene comes into the room half an hour later, a little tentatively and with eyes that look like she's been crying. I get up and pull her against me.
"You ok, Spot?"
"Yup. Want to introduce me to this beautiful young lady here?" She smiles at Faith, but I can feel the tension coming off her. She’s nervous about this.
"Honey, remember the friend I told you about? This is Arlene, my girlfriend."
Faith's eyes cautiously take in Arlene and then the arm I have around Arlene's shoulders.
"Hi." She says quietly.
"Hi Faith. You’re even prettier than your brother told me."
This earns Arlene a little smile, but Faith will need some time to warm up to someone new. I haven't told her about coming home to Colorado with me yet, wanting to take it one step at a time. She'll probably need to adjust to the idea.
When Arlene asks to be shown the vegetable garden I had mentioned to her, I can see Faith's reservations slip a little more. Excited to show off her favorite pastime, she calls Janet to take us down to the garden. Point two for Arlene.
In stark contrast with the forbidding front of the building, the gardens in the back are surprisingly spacious and beautiful even in winter. Discovering Faith's interest in growing things, Janet had asked to have a vegetable patch put in as part of Faith's therapy and it worked. It had given Faith a very positive self-image and ironically, a better ability to communicate her feelings, something she had not been able to do for many years, resulting in self-destructive tantrums that were difficult to control without medication. The garden is something she will miss more than anything and I am concerned how she will respond to leaving it.
Again, Arlene seems to have picked up on everything, because she carefully begins questioning Faith on how one should start a vegetable garden. Telling her she has a small restaurant and she would love to grow some of her own.
"You know, it would be wonderful if one day you could come and maybe help me build my garden. Help me grow the vegetables until they are big enough for us to pick, then Sebastian can prepare them and the people that visit the diner can taste the wonderful veggies we've grown."
Having Arlene use my full name fills me with an immense sense of well-being. Having her chatting away with Faith about the garden and the restaurant exposes the remnants of dreams I had many years ago, ones I thought were long buried. Dreams I put to rest, but that suddenly doesn't seem that unattainable anymore.
"You were great with her. I had a hard time keeping my hands off you." Seb whispers in my ear while he pushes me up against the wall in our hotel room.
We had both been exhausted when we left Faith for the night, but somewhere Seb must have found his second wind because the moment we are through the door of our hotel room, his mouth crashes down on mine and he devours me. Wild and hungry, his restless hands are squeezing and kneading my flesh, sliding over my curves, while I have tangled my fingers in his hair, pulling and tugging. Any fatigue I may have felt is gone, replaced by a humming just under my skin, a need to taste and feel and fuck. Goosebumps rise all over my body and I can actually feel my nipples and my clit engorge with blood. I feel ravenous.
With my back against the wall, Seb rubs his hard body against mine, scraping over my sensitive nipples and against my pussy. So instantly hot.
"Your smell drives me crazy and I don't want to control myself." He growls in my neck.
"Don't. Just let go. Let go of everything. Give it to me, I can take everything you've got."
"Wrap your legs around me, I only have one arm to carry you and I'm not putting you down."
Doing as he asks, my arms are tight around his neck and my legs around his waist. With one big hand on my ass, he walks me right into the large hotel bathroom, where he lets me slide to the floor and turns me to face the mirror behind the counter. Putting his chin on my shoulder and sliding his hands under my shirt, he locks his eyes with mine.
"Gonna undress you, right here. Gonna touch and taste you and then I'm gonna fuck you. And you're gonna watch me do it."
Ohmygod… I almost go down, my knees buckling. I arch back, curving my ass against his hot, hard length and leaning my head back on his shoulder. I've never been so turned on. So fucking horny I could come on the spot. My mouth falls open against the full body sensations that have me whimper like an animal. I don't lose eye contact with him in the mirror. His eyes are mesmerizing, glowing with dark intent. His lips are wet and slightly opened, his breath panting out in bursts, beside my ear. His hands… Fuck me, his big rough, working hands are stroking my skin into a frenzied heat. When they slip under the edge of my bra and find my nipples, I can't stop the full-bodied 'Yessss' that hisses from my mouth. Impatient now, Seb whips my shirt over my head and uses one hand to release the catch on my bra in the back, the other holding it to keep my breasts covered in view of the mirror. Christ, the view of his big tattooed arm crossing my chest, covering my breasts is beautiful.
"You see what I see, Spot? You and me. We are amazing together."
"Mmmmmm." Is my intelligent contribution, all cognition concentrating on more important things, like the hand that was just at my back, slowly sliding to the front of my pants and undoing the button and zipper. He works my pants down while still holding my breasts covered.
"Love the anticipation of your fucking luscious breasts, babe. Gonna love even more, watching them bounce when I pound into you."
The contrast of the private, gentle and sweet Seb, with this raw, dirty and rough-edged Seb is the biggest turn-on.
Slowly, he lets my bra fall away and without his arm to hold them in place, my gravity challenged breasts swing free. I go to cover them with my hands, feeling a little exposed under his intense glare via the mirror, but he stops me and holds my hands down on the counter.
"Don't. Most glorious sight I've seen."
Looking up, I see myself, but on fire. My hair is messed up, my eyes shine, my face and chest are flushed and when he pulls me up straight in his arms, I can see a ripe body. A soft, eager, and aroused, ripe body. The look in Seb's eyes tells me he believes me beautiful. So I am. His eyes are the only ones that matter.
"You. Are. Breath-taking." He says, and I smile.
"Bend over."
Without hesitation or any remaining self-conscious feelings, I stretch my arms over the counter, spread my legs and grant him full access. I wasn't expecting the long lazy lick, from my clit all the way up my crack. But I don't budge, I allow myself to feel, just to concentrate on the sensations he is creating. His hands on the globes of my ass, he plays me with his tongue from front to back, making me tremble on my legs. One long hard pull on the super center of nerves between my legs, and I am on the verge of coming.
"Not yet." He cautions, pulling away and lining his large cock up with my opening. He grabs the base and plays with the head of his dick through my folds, lubricating around my pussy.
"Look at me."
I lift my head slightly and find him standing behind me in all his colorful glory, hands on my hips. Then he slams home, making me lose my breath.
"Unnhhh…"
At a furious pace, Seb fucks me so hard, the sweat is dripping off his body on my back. I barely have time to take a breath, before the mother of orgasms has my eyes rolling to the back of my head. But Seb squeezes my neck and bites out; "Watch."
I watch. I watch as the intensity slides
out of his eyes, replaced with a look of wonder. I watch as his clenched jaw suddenly falls open in utter submission. And I watch when his lips form "Love you", just before his seed fills me in hot spurts.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
By Friday we had edged on to the subject of Colorado several times and Faith seemed to feel more at ease, talking about herself in Cedar Tree; what she would do, where she would stay when she visits. Still all in distant terms, but enough to encourage Seb to broach the possibility of Faith coming with us to find a home close by. All four of us; Faith, Janet, Seb and I are bundled up against the cold, sitting at a picnic table in the garden just after breakfast on Saturday enjoying the morning sun, when he brings it up.
"But what about my garden? Who will take care of it?"
Anticipating that concern, Janet has come up with a plan. "Well, you know Mr. Hoyden, the gardener? He says he will be happy to look after your garden, if it’s alright with you that he sometimes brings some of the vegetables home for his family. What do you think? All the plants are gone for the winter anyway, and he will make sure new plants will come in for the spring."
When Faith still looks a little subdued, I add; "And remember I have that new garden that needs to be started in the spring in Cedar Tree. I could really use your help."
With the promise of a new garden to put in, she moves on to her next concern. Leaving Janet behind. But when she finds out that Janet is coming with us for a while, she gets excited.
It takes us most of Saturday to pack all of Faith's things. Not always an easy task, especially since some of it has to be shipped separately; we can only carry so much with us on the plane. But with Janet's help and her brother's promise that she can come along to bring the extra boxes to the UPS store for shipping, she is fairly easily appeased
