It became quiet. She pressed her ear harder to the door and heard the unmistakable sounds of Nick crying. Josie barged in and saw him curled in a ball on the floor, sobbing.
She rushed to him. “Nick… I don’t know what happened, but I’m so sorry it made you this upset.” Sitting, she pulled him to her chest, wrapping her arms around him. He choked on his own tears. Pulling off his hat, she ran her slender fingers through his messy hair. As Josie rocked him side-to-side, Nick sagged against her chest and held on for dear life.
When he finally calmed enough to talk, he leaned back and wiped his face with his sleeve. He was in sad shape—swollen eyes, red face, and still choking up. “I’m sorry,” he croaked.
“No. Don’t be,” she soothed. “Talk to me.”
“I’m just so angry and…and fucking hurt.”
“What happened?”
“I support her. I spent a long ass time wanting to beat the fuck out of Henry for his drinking because he hurt my sister over and over again. I can’t even begin to tell you what he has put her through. Do you know what he did to her?”
“No…,” Josie worried.
“He manipulated her so badly, I can’t even bring myself to tell her.”
“What did he do?”
“One time, he held a gun to his head. I spent quite some time trying to talk him out of ending his life because she needs him. After several attempts, Elaina was finally able to get him to put down the gun. And do you know what that fucker did?”
“No…,” she replied with caution.
“The gun was empty, Josie. It was fucking empty.” Her jaw dropped open. “Claire talked me out of beating him. I so wanted to teach that fucker a lesson for treating my sister like that, but Claire wouldn’t let me. I was told I had to support her no matter what, so that’s what I fucking did,” he growled. “That’s exactly what I did. I put up with his bullshit just for her.”
“Wow…”
“Yeah…wow. And now, when I need her support, she tears me to bits. Why, Josie? Why would she do that to me? Why…?” He fell apart again. She scooted across the floor and grabbed him. “Why would she treat me that way?” he cried into her neck.
Josie kissed his cheek and held his face in her hands. “I don’t know, but I’m here for you. I am your support.”
“Thank you,” he choked out. “Please don’t say anything to her about the empty gun. I promised Claire I would never tell her. I can’t beak my promise to her.”
“What empty gun?” Josie smiled.
Nick smirked through his tears. “You’re pretty awesome, you know that?” He leaned forward and brushed his lips across hers. “Thank you. I needed that.”
She cupped her tiny hand around his scruffy cheek. “Any time you need to talk or get out your emotions, I am here for you. I promise. You can count on me to be here to listen.”
“Thank you. You have no idea how much that means to me.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her onto his lap. Quietly, they held one another.
Chapter 15
Gunther lay back on their bed after another amazing lovemaking session with Quinn. “Love?” he lazily sighed.
“Yeah?” she answered in the same tone.
“Have I ever told you how much you please me?”
She laughed. “Everyday.”
“And how beautiful you are?”
“Everyday.”
“Goddamn, woman. You make my toenails curl.” He rolled over and spooned her. She pushed her ass right into his hips and rubbed. “Keep doing that and I will pound your arse hard.”
She laughed again. “Well, maybe I should put a little distance between us then.” She tried to pull away, but he curled his arm around her tighter, holding her closer.
“No, you don’t,” he murmured, latching onto her earlobe, causing her to moan, turning him on again. His heavy length was ready for more attention.
Just as Gunther was rolling on top of Quinn and kissing her as if his life depended on it, someone knocked on their door. He lifted his head, but she grabbed him and pulled him back down to her lips. While slipping his tongue into her mouth, the knock came again.
“Fuck,” he growled against her lips. “This better be good. Like, someone had better be dead.”
He stood and pulled on his jeans, tucking his hard length away for the moment. Quinn scurried around and dressed. Holding a shirt in front of him, he went to the door.
Josie was standing in the hall, not looking well. “Is Quinn around?”
“Yeah.” Gunther turned back to make sure Quinn had dressed, then waved Josie in.
Quinn approached and took Josie’s arms. “What’s going on, sweetheart?”
“Can I talk to you…alone?” Her eyes flickered to Gunther.
“Let me change into my gym shorts and I’ll be out of here in a sec.” He grabbed his clothes and headed into the bathroom. Moments later, he was leaving the room, heading to the gym to work off his sexual frustration.
“Do you want to sit?” Quinn asked as the door shut behind him.
Josie shuffled to a chair next to the desk. Quinn hopped up and sat on the desk with her hands tucked under her thighs.
“I need to talk about something and you’re the only one I feel I can turn to.”
“All right. I’m all ears.”
Josie fidgeted with her fingers, pulling loose threads from the tattered knees of her jeans. “I think I’m in love with Nick.” Quinn wasn’t surprised by the confession. She had noticed them becoming closer, and Josie seemed happy and almost carefree when she was with him. “We’ve been hanging out more, even alone in his room.”
In a flash, Quinn was concerned about Josie getting pregnant. “Are you having sex with him?”
“No.” Josie looked down and seemed sad, making Quinn furrow her brows.
“What’s going on, Josie? Talk to me.”
Letting out a long breath, she said, “He’s still in love with Claire, so we haven’t fully…connected. We’ve kissed and touched a little, but nothing more than that. He asks me to stay the night in his room so he can hold me all night. It’s like he needs someone there, so I stay just for that. It hurts, but I want to be there for him.”
“Sweetie…” Quinn was upset for Josie, but she didn’t want to show her that. “I understand what you’re doing, but I just want to give you a little motherly advice.” Quinn hopped off the desk and knelt in front of her, taking Josie’s trembling hands, locking eyes. “Listen to me carefully and do what you will with my advice. Nick’s heart is with Claire. He will never be able to fully commit to you as long as that’s the case. The last thing you want or need to happen is to get pregnant on top of that. Don’t rush your relationship with him. He may be able to move forward with you in the future, but he needs a friend more than a lover right now. I won’t be angry with you or scold you if you decide to move deeper into this relationship. I will support you and be there for you one hundred and ten percent. I’m just worried you will get your heart broken. I advise you to stay guarded and take things slow. He’s a broken-hearted man.”
“It hurts because he says he wants to be with me, he trusts me, and he thinks I’m talented and beautiful…”
“You are all of those things. He’s right about that.”
“But we… Ugh.” Josie blushed.
“What, sweetie?”
“I’m a virgin,” she mumbled. “We were doing some stuff and he… Christ, this is so embarrassing.”
“It’s okay. Say what you need to say,” Quinn encouraged. “I won’t judge and it will be between you and me.”
“He was touching me, but I recoiled when he… It hurt and he immediately stopped.”
“Gotcha. Well, maybe he’s right. It’s obvious that he cares about you. Okay?” Josie nodded. “Just relax. Until then, support him and offer him comfort when he needs it. Just be available for him, but don’t try to rush into anything yet.”
“Okay.”
“Does that help?”
“That’s…” She shook her head. “It’s sad. He’s been through so much. You tell him if he needs a neutral party to talk to, he can come to me at any time.”
“I will. Thank you. I know he will appreciate that.” They both stood. “Well, I’m going to go. I need to clear my head.”
“It was nice chatting with you.” Quinn smiled, then pulled Josie into a hug before walking her to the door. “Come to me any time about anything.”
“Thank you.”
Josie left the room with no answers, but at least she got some things off her chest.
Chapter 16
About a week had passed, but Nick was still upset with Elaina. They walked past one another several times without a word spoken between them. She noticed he had gotten closer to Josie and when they were together, both of them glared at Elaina. So she suspected he told Josie about their minor disagreement.
The cross was finished. It came out beautiful with all the hand-painted flowers, flourishes, and lettering. Quinn was a true artist and Elaina appreciated her help on the project. She knew Henry would be pleased.
Henry and Gunther kept disappearing for what seemed like hours at a time. Elaina tried to follow them several times, but they knew and would catch her every time.
Deciding to grab the cross from the art room, Elaina went to the cafeteria to wait for Henry to be finished with whatever he was doing with Gunther.
The rest of the crew was in there, including Ben’s group. Lauren seemed to be looking better, but she still looked uncomfortable in her pregnant state. Josie and Thomas were sitting one table away from them, pretending to thumb through a selection of books from the library; Nick was teaching Kate more chords on the guitar; Cora worked with Silas on his writing; and Quinn was playing with Callie. Considering their circumstances, everyone seemed to be in a good mood.
Being so preoccupied, no one noticed Elaina carrying a three foot cross. She set it on the table and sat in a chair, tracing the flourishes with her fingertips. As she waited for Henry, she bounced a knee and fidgeted.
When he and Gunther finally walked through the door, they were laughing and carrying on like old chums. Elaina was happy it was that versus behaving like megalomaniacs.
“Hey, love!” I said rather loudly as Gunther and I walked into the cafeteria.
Elaina stood as I made my way to her. My gaze fell upon a cross on the table, my jaw hanging open. I picked it up and ran my fingers over each letter of Sophie’s name. The colors were beautiful and bright. The patterns were unspeakably glorious.
“Did you make this?” I whispered.
“Quinn did all of the fancy stuff, but yes, I did.”
“This is…brilliant,” I murmured. I swallowed hard, trying to choke back what was brewing in the back of my throat. “I… I… I don’t even know what to say.”
Placing her hand on my shoulder, Elaina reassured, “You don’t have to say anything.”
My vision blurred from the tears forming. Covering my mouth with the back of my hand, I tried to stifle the cries pushing forward. “I need a minute,” I croaked.
“Take your time, lover,” she whispered. She reached up and brushed her knuckles over my stubble. I took the cross and hurried out of the cafeteria.
Elaina watched Henry walk down the hall, then head out the side door. Rushing footsteps came up from behind her. “Did he like it?” Quinn asked.
“I think so. He took it and said he needed a minute. He was crying.”
“Oh no. I was hoping it would make him happy, not sad.”
“Me, too. Maybe it was a mistake. I think I’m going to go apologize to him.”
Elaina jogged off down the hall to the door and opened it, looking around for Henry. She didn’t see him or hear him, so she decided to try behind the school first.
Luck was on her side. He was sitting on the graveled back parking lot, leaning against the brick wall. He had the cross laying on his chest, hugging it. It was arduous to witness.
The need to get away from everyone and spend a moment thinking about Sophie overwhelmed me. Escaping the situation was the only option. I pushed through the side door and looked in every direction before deciding to hide behind the building. Hard and heavy in my left hand, I carried what was left of my emotions. I looked around the area, making sure the coast was clear before I dropped my ass in the parking lot and leaned against the wall.
I held the cross between my knees. “Goddamn…,” I whispered, a distant chuckle echoing in my head. My hands pushed through my hair and I ducked my head, fighting everything surfacing.
I tried to shut the demons down while trying not to cry, but all the visuals from the day Sophie died came forward. More tears spilled over. Then the exasperation rattled me straight to the core.
A growl tore from my throat, rushing past the tears. I wanted to beat down someone. I wanted to fuck shit up…
I wanted to drink.
I stared at the beautiful gift. Something selfless…something heartfelt. When I became weary from the heavy emotions, the demons ebbed, along with the anger.
“Do you see this?” I whispered as my eyes tracked to the clouds. “This is why I love her, Sophie. This is the real Elaina.” I pulled the cross taut into my body, hugging it.
“Henry?” Elaina called out. I glanced up at her as she jogged toward me. “Oh, Henry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to upset you.” I wiped my face with the back of my hand. “Can I sit?”
“Yes,” I choked out.
“Please, accept my apology.”
“There’s no reason to apologize. I’m not upset with you. This is…” I held the cross out in front of me again, my fingers flitting over the flourishes. Once again, sadness draped over me like a heavy cloth. “It’s just brilliant. This is the most amazing gift anyone has ever given me. Thank you.”
“I promised you that once we settled somewhere, we would have a memorial for Sophie. Well, you called this place home. So I thought it was fitting to make something in her honor. Do you like it?”
“Elaina, I love it. It’s just hard. I miss her so fucking much. She was the only one who truly understood me.” As soon as those words escaped my lips, I knew they would cut Elaina straight through to her soul, but she could never fully understand me because she wasn’t like me. “I have been trying to set her aside in my mind because every time I think about her, I want to drink myself numb. I do right now, in fact,” I muttered with anger and shame.
“Henry, I’m sorry.” Elaina reached for the cross, griping it tight and trying to take it from me. “I’ll get rid of it. I don’t want to drum up those feelings for you. That’s the last thing I want to happen.”
“No. Please. I need to face this…sober and with you by my side. Will you help me? You’re the only one who can.” Elaina nodded. I pulled the cross close. “Let’s go put it the ground somewhere so I have a place to go when I need to talk to her.”
We stood and walked toward the woods to the beautiful oak tree left untouched, kind of like a beacon. I jammed the pointed end into the ground, adjusting it so it was straight. Standing back, I admired the beauty of it.
Elaina took my hand and interlaced her fingers with mine. I gave it a good solid squeeze, then wrapped my arms around her. I needed her and she came through for me, holding me while I wept.
For the first time without a bottle to my lips, I faced my feelings about Sophie’s death.
Hushing me while stroking my hair, she repeatedly told me how brave I was, and how proud she was of me for putting the bottle down.
We sat, leaning against the trunk of the oak. As she pulled me into her body, I turned around and looked into her eyes. Then she pushed the hair off my forehead
. “You’re in need. They’re graying and so…sullen.” I nodded. “Come on. Let’s get you inside.”
“I need to give Quinn a proper thank you for helping you do this.”
“After you’ve had your fix.” With appreciation for her taking care of me, I nodded again.
I loved her so bloody much.
Leaning against the wall, I reveled in my high. My eyes were closed, my face was relaxed, and my breathing was slow and deep. Elaina sat close by, watching me.
“How are you doing?” she asked just above a whisper.
Cracking open my eyes, the words came out soft and breathy, “Brilliant. Thank you for everything.”
“That sparkle is back,” she said. Then she smirked. “They are full of lust and, sitting so close to you, I can feel it.”
Without hesitation, I pounced on Elaina. My kisses were rough and my hands greedily roamed her body that I loved so much.
In a hurried fashion, I pulled off our clothes, tossing them across the room. My lips roamed over her body, nipping her skin and making her shudder. I tortured her while concentrating on her breasts.
She sighed with pleasure, making me groan. “Please, Henry… I need you in me.” She reached down to try to guide me into her, but I held myself just outside of her already dripping, aching body.
She couldn’t overpower me. In wild passion, I kissed her and almost felt like I was in some other place—clouds, space, another galaxy. But, without a doubt, I was lucid.
Elaina grabbed my face and made me look at her. “Henry?”
“I’m going to fuck you so hard, Elaina. So…fucking…hard,” I growled. She smiled and settled back, allowing me to dominate her.
I sent her reeling into ecstasy, pounding her. She fisted my hair and raked her nails down my back, digging them into my ass. She met every deep thrust with a flurry of moans and throaty groans, screaming my name a few times for good measure. All our feral sexual sounds spun through the room, reverberating off the walls. I came with a shout, feeling like the head was going to blow off my cock. Insane.
Fractured Hearts (Shattered Lives, Book Three) Page 16
