by Evelyn Glass
I went for the door, and yanked it open. Thad called out to me, his voice small and pathetic from where he was crumpled on the floor.
“Breaker promised me the whole night with you,” he snarled, but there was a weakness to his voice now. I always knew that these kinds of guys were cowards at heart, but I hadn’t expected Thaddeus to reveal himself quite so quickly or quite so pathetically.
“Breaker’s got a lot of explaining to do,” I snapped back, and slammed the door shut behind me. I was sick of the men around me using me like currency, lying to me, back–tracking and trying to make themselves out to be the good guy. And I needed someone to take it out on.
Chapter Seventeen
As soon as I got into the apartment, I started questioning my decision. I had handed Angel over for nothing more than a name. A name! Would she accept that as a response when I told her the truth? Jesus, I had no idea what Thaddeus would be doing to her, and frankly I didn’t even want to know. My stomach twisted up into a knot, and I knew the only thing that would calm me down would be a solid shot of whisky. Or several. I went to the cupboard, and pulled out the bottle I had stashed in there a few nights before. I swigged straight from the cheap plastic, grimacing as the liquid burned its way down my throat. But it helped, at least a little. I would need to put the whole bottle away before I forgot what he had told me, though, and what I had done to get it.
Raven Merlot. I had always teased her about that name – I told her that it sounded like the name of someone who spent their evenings dancing around poles at a sleazy bar, but she ignored me, shooting me foul looks in response to my flippancy. We had met at some club meeting that I’d somehow snaked my way into thanks to my connections with a few of the members, and we ended up fucking in her car before I took her back to my place that evening. She didn’t leave for a week, and after that, she became the closest thing to a girlfriend that I’d had in years.
I didn’t find out what she did for a long time. She was always careful to dodge the question when I brought it up, and aligned herself with my brand of petty criminality instead of telling me the truth. In fact, it was Thad who broke the news to me. He took me aside, slapped an arm around my shoulder, and asked if I knew what my girlfriend did for a living. She was leaning up against the bar at the other side of the room, in a pair of tight jeans and a sweater, and Thad was being his usual asshole self. I stepped out from under his arm and turned to him. I didn’t work for him, I didn’t owe him any of the niceties that his staff did.
“We don’t really do much talking,” I replied, knowing that it would piss him off that this woman was more into me than him. He was the type to cock his leg up and piss on a chick if he thought it would keep other guys away from her; I, on the other hand, didn’t bother with that. There were enough women with their eyes on me that I’d never needed to be possessive. If some chick was done with me, that was fine; someone else was ready for a turn. He frowned, and spat the words out at my feet in annoyance.
“She does wet works for me,” he replied. “Has for years. She ever tell you about that?”
I didn’t answer, doing my best to keep my face neutral as I assessed the situation. Thad grinned at me triumphantly, and I could tell that he was loving this. He always like to get one over on any of the guys who refused to work for him, and I was one of them. He loved every moment of my conflicted, confused attempt to sort out what to do.
I confronted Raven about it later in the evening. I half–expecting her to deny the whole thing, call me crazy and take me back to her place to fuck the idea out of my head. But she didn’t. We were outside her place, having a cigarette, when I got the words out at last.
She paused, letting an exhale of smoke envelop her face for a moment, as though she was hiding from me. Then, she replied.
“Well, yeah.”
“What the fuck?” I exclaimed, stunned. I had known she was involved in some shady shit, but I had never delved too deep into it – honor amongst thieves, and all that shit.
“It was the only way I could get out of doing…other shit for them,” she sounded agitated. “it’s not a big deal, is it?”
“Uh, yeah,” I replied. “There’s a lot of cons out in the world, and even drugs, but killing people, Raven? Shit…”
I trailed off, and let the words hang in the air between us. I had done a lot of mildly terrible crap over the course of my life, but I could never imagine hurting someone the way that she had. Murder was…shit, that was a whole other level of black hat. I looked at her small hands, and imagined them wrapped around the grip of a gun. The thought was unsettling.
“What was the other shit they wanted you to do?” I asked, frowning, cycling back over her words once my surprise had diminished. She shook her head and waved her hand, and I knew the conversation – and the relationship, such as it was – was over right then and there.
“It’s not important,” she said, her gaze tight on mine as she dared me to challenge her. “I’ll tell you about it some other time.”
She never did, and we split up about two weeks later. I told myself it was for the best. I’d known people who ran with murderers and dirty players, and sooner or later, they ended up deeper than they meant to be. I was happy running low level cons and playing cards. When she kicked my ass out of her bed, I was a little relieved, even if I’d never met anyone else who was quite as wild in bed as she was. We stayed out of each other’s way. I didn’t see her until I returned to Thaddeus’ club, and spotted her watching Angel and I from across the room.
And I’ll admit, it was a shock to see her. The way she looked at the two of us, I could see something in her eyes – it wasn’t quite jealousy, but something else, something more profound than that. The way she eyed me, it wasn’t regret or anger or anything else that you might feel upon seeing an old lover for the first time. That expression was stuck in my mind, and had since I’d last seen her. I needed to figured out exactly what she meant with that look, but I had no way to seek her out and ask her. Well, maybe I could ask about for a hitman and see if she turned up? If she was still working there after all those years, I had to assume she was pretty damn good.
I took another sip of my drink. All this thinking about Raven wasn’t doing much to distract me from the fact that Angel was out there with Thaddeus, probably convinced that I had sold her out and that I didn’t give a flying fuck about her. What would I do when she got back? Tell her the truth, that I had the name of the person who killed her father? And, oh, that person just so happened to be my ex–lover? Yeah, I’m sure that would go very well.
I continued drinking, still standing up, leaning against the counter. My brain was starting to get blurry around the edges, my thoughts running into each other a little but not enough for me to actually forget what I had done today. I had to trust that Angel was a big girl, and could take care of herself. She’d certainly handled me just fine.
Suddenly, I heard a noise at the back end of the apartment, from the bedroom. I carefully placed the bottle down, quiet enough that it wouldn’t alert anyone to my presence. We had already had one break–in here, and I had assumed that we wouldn’t be getting another. Angel had taken that guy down so unequivocally, and no doubt he had reported back to Thaddeus and his crew l that we were not to be fucked with. So what kind of person would they send back here to finish the job? They’d have to be fucking insane.
I didn’t move a muscle, ears pricked. Maybe I was just being paranoid and I hadn’t heard anything. I was already on edge as it was, and it wouldn’t have taken a lot for my overactive imagination to fill in blanks where there were none. But then I heard the unmistakable sound of a pistol cocking, and my heart began to pound in my chest.
Adrenalin lanced through my body. I needed to find some way to arm myself. I looked around, but I couldn’t see much beyond the useless dinner knives bunched up in a cluster on the counter. Those wouldn’t do much good against bullets.
We were both aware of each other at that second, but neither
of us moved another muscle. My ears were pricked, but I couldn’t so much make out the sound of someone breathing through there. Whoever they had sent, they weren’t fucking around. This person wanted me dead, and if I hadn’t already been on high alert, they might well have picked me off where I stood.
I made out the sudden sound of fabric rustling, someone moving towards the door. I shifted my weight from one foot to the other and peered through the frame, but I couldn’t make anything out. And then, at last, she revealed herself.
Raven stepped out from behind the doorframe at once, and scanned the room. It was as though she wasn’t there looking for me. If she had been, she’d have started shooting as soon as she laid eyes on me, no questions asked, no second chances. But she didn’t. The gun was only half–raised, and she let out a sharp breath of air as though annoyed at what she saw in front of her. And then, after a moment’s pause, she raised the gun and pointed it in my direction.
“Raven–“ I tried to reason with her, but I knew there was no point. She aimed briefly, cocking her head to the side, and steadied her hands for a moment. I took the split–second chance and barreled towards her, head down low, as she let loose the first shot. It sailed over me as I ploughed into her, wrapping my arms around her small waist and bringing her down easily. She was still tiny, and I was able to restrain her without trouble – she pointed the gun up at me once more and let loose another shot, but I knocked her hands to the side, and the bullet whiffed past me. I wrestled the weapon from her hands and clicked out the cartridge, then dumped the gun ten feet away. I grabbed her hands and pushed them over her head. There was a moment, with her pinned beneath me, breathing hard, where my brain got confused. How many times had I held her like this when we were together? But that wasn’t where I was now, and I pushed my thoughts far away from that before my dick got any big ideas.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I demanded, but she slid her eyes away from mine. She was still looking around the room, as though she expected to see someone else. Angel? Surely not. Everyone must have known she was at Thad’s that evening, he’d probably broadcast that to the whole damn—
Before I could linger a second longer on those thoughts, the door clicked open behind me, and I snapped my head around to see who it was. The sight made my stomach drop to the floor.
Chapter Eighteen
If there’s one thing that’s going to let you know how you really feel about someone, it’s walking in on them on top of their ex–girlfriend.
The door had been unlocked when I’d made my way up to Breaker’s place; I hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but as soon as I got inside, I saw why he’d been so distracted.
I couldn’t see them at first, as they were lying just inside the bedroom door, but as soon as I got closer, I could tell for certain that it was her. I felt a wash of humiliation across my body, my skin prickling as I stared down at the two of them like that. He had her hands pinned up over her hand and was straddling her, her small form looking delicate beneath his. I closed my eyes for a moment, but the image of them both was imprinted in my brain. The man I thought I was falling for, and the woman who had killed my father. Double whammy. Didn’t get much more fucked–up than that.
“Jesus,” I muttered to myself. Thad had to have been lying. Breaker had clearly only wanted me out of this place so he could spend some time reconnecting with this Raven bitch. I clenched my fists, so hard I was surprised blood didn’t come trickling from between my fingers. I wanted to kick him off her and choke the life out of her there and then, to make her pay for what she’d done to my father. The best I could manage was removing myself from the situation post–fucking–haste, before I did anything that could be held against me in a court of law.
I grabbed for Breaker’s keys where he had dumped them on the table, and went for the door. He sprang to his feet at once – well, almost, as he kept one hand on her, as though not wanting to break the fantasy of their little encounter. I found tears pricking my eyes as I stormed back into the hallway and down the steps.
“Angel, I–“
I slammed the door in his face, not wanting to give him even the hint of a chance to explain himself. He’d pulled enough shit today. This is where it ended. Right fucking here.
As I stormed back out on to the street, I found myself face–to–face with the auctioneer. He was smoking, and quickly stubbed out his butt as I approached – as though that would be the thing I got him into trouble for when the cops got involved.
“Breaker’s bike, which was is it?” I demanded, waving my hand over the half–dozen or so that were parked outside the club. The auctioneer pointed to a slightly beat–up maroon number, and I fumbled with the keys to get the thing going. Dad had never allowed me a bike, but that hadn’t stopped me convincing the odd boyfriend to give me runs on theirs.
“Angel, stop!” I heard a voice from behind me, and turned to see Breaker coming down the building stairs. I didn’t stop moving. Tough shit. I was out of here once and for all, and I was going to take this place down without any of their help. I was going to see justice done for my father, and I had no interest in breathing in this shit stank for even one second longer.
I climbed on to the bike, started it, and pulled away from the club in a roar of dirty smoke and a screech of tires. My heart was pumping so fast I thought it might blow out of my chest, but I managed to keep my cool enough to figure out where I was going. Out of town, into the deserted forest that surrounded us, and then I’d looped back around to the police station once I’d shaken everyone. There were frightening odds that Breaker wouldn’t be the only one after me; Thaddeus would be chasing me to punish me for his humiliation, and the auctioneer would likely want confirmation that he wasn’t going to wind up in any trouble for his actions.
I tore through the streets, glad it was late enough that no one else was on them to pull me over. Not that cops bothered much with this part of the city – I could have been balancing on this bike on one foot and fully naked and no one would have bothered to stop me. I tried not to think too hard about what I was doing, because every time I focused on the fact that I was riding a motorcycle, I was positive that my nerves were going to give out and I was going to slide this thing into a wall.
I watched the speedometer pick up: fifty, sixty miles an hour, more, more, more. I heard the growl of an engine behind me, and glanced over my shoulder to see Breaker a dozen feet away, on a bike that had been sitting next to his one. Of course he could hotwire. Or snag the keys from someone else. This was what he did, after all.
I turned back to face the road, and swerved onto a street which led to the outskirts of town. We used to live out this way, far out from the city. I loved it here, once upon a time, but it had been a while since I’d wanted to come back. Too many memories of my father and the trips we’d make to go camping in the woods together. I forced them from my mind and pushed the bike faster, the air whipping through my hair and numbing my face completely. It was just what I needed at that moment – something sharp and painful, something to take my mind off of everything that had just happened. Raven, Breaker, Thaddeus, every tiny thing that had been fucking with my head since I had arrived in this awful place.
I could hear Breaker behind me, and glanced over my shoulder again to see that he had gained on me. His face was twisted with something that looked like regret, and the roads were empty save for the two of us. I pressed the bike to go even faster, the roar of the engine nearly deafening me. If he wanted to catch me, he would have to try harder than–
It all happened to quickly that I didn’t have a chance to think about what was happening. The bike hit something slick, and the front wheel skidded out from underneath me. I let out a scream of terror, but it was whipped away by the sound of the tire screeching across the road and off into the mossy underbrush, tearing up through the mud with an awful, guttural groan. Whatever instincts I had for this kind of thing kicked in at once; I managed to lunge myself free before the bike smashed
into the thick, solid oak that stood only a few feet from the road. I landed with a thump, rolling a few feet as the sound of crumpling metal rang through the air about me.
I lay on the ground for a moment, my brain deafened by the screaming fear that seemed to carry me through those next few minutes. I moved each one of my limbs at a time, testing them out. Yeah, I was still alive. I wasn’t even hurt. I turned my head to the side and saw that the motorcycle looked as though it had been put through some kind of paper shredder. It was nothing but a miserable pile of mangled metal. I didn’t even want to think how fast I had been going when I came off the road, but here I was. Alive. As though I had business to take care of yet, and the universe wasn’t done with me.
I heard another motorcycle pull to a halt not far from me, but I could be bothered to turn my head. Seconds later, Breaker was above me, looking down at me with an expression of unadulterated fear.
“Angel?” he asked, his voice soft and careful, as though he was worried he was going to break me if he spoke too loudly. I looked up at him. I couldn’t believe that, even though I’d just been through the scariest accident of my life, my anger at him outweighed my fear at what I’d just been through.
