The fans cheered as soon as they saw Jessi peering through the glass doors at the front entrance that opened up onto 45th Street. She stepped out onto the sidewalk, amazed at the amount of people already on line. Every time they called her name, a surge of adrenaline raced through her veins. This was the recognition she longed for.
She adored the fans and she wanted to spend as much time with them as possible, but she knew she was needed backstage, so she waited until the absolute last second before she thanked them all for coming to the show and headed back inside.
The security guard at the door stopped her and blocked her path. “Where do you think you’re going, miss?”
Jessi reached for her all access pass, but it wasn’t in her back pocket. She must have left it inside. “I work for Falcon Records. I’m with Immortal Angel.”
The stone-faced security guard nodded sarcastically. “Sure you are.”
“I’m not kidding. I just came out through this door a little while ago. Don’t you remember me?”
“No one came through this door since I’ve been here.”
She looked closer at him. He wasn’t the same security guard that was at the door earlier. She didn’t have her pass. She didn’t have her phone. She had to get back inside. “I’m Tommy Blade’s wife. Can you please send someone back to get him?”
“Who?”
“Tommy Blade. The guitar player.”
“Look, lady, I’ve been doing this for 20 years. Everyone is a close personal friend of the band. No pass, no entry.”
“But, I’m really his wife. I work for Falcon Records. I’m the band’s personal assistant. I need to get back inside.”
He ignored her. He wasn’t even looking at her anymore.
She searched for anyone who might have a pass and could let her inside, but the only other people outside, besides fans, were a few other security guards. She began asking them if they remembered her and could let her inside, but none of them did. Some fans overheard and tried to help her.
“That’s Jessi Blade,” a few of them shouted out. “She’s married to Tommy Blade.”
“See?” Jessi told the security guard. “They know who I am. I’m not lying.”
He shook his head. “I can’t let you in without a pass.”
“Jessi?”
She didn’t recognize the man walking toward her.
“It’s me, Brian.”
It was the singer from Tommy’s old band, Psychobabble. She didn’t recognize him because his waist-length hair was now cut above his collar. She hadn’t seen or heard from him since shortly after Tommy left Psychobabble to join Immortal Angel. She ran to Brian and hugged him. “Look at your hair! What made you cut it?”
“I just got tired of it. How’s everything?”
“Wonderful. How’s Diana?”
He shrugged. “We split up a few months ago. I haven’t seen her since then.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. I liked her a lot. Did you come to see Tommy?”
“Tommy? No. I’m a bartender here. I heard your name, and then saw your hair. How do these people know who you are? How do they know you’re Tommy’s wife?”
“Haven’t you heard of Immortal Angel?”
“Yeah.” Confusion clouded his face. “But only because they’re playing here tonight. I think I heard one of their songs on the radio the other day. They’re a punk rock band, right? What does that have to do with Tommy?”
“Tommy’s the guitar player. It’s the band Tommy joined when he left Psychobabble. Remember?”
“Really?” His eyes widened with realization. “Wait a minute. You mean Tommy’s in a signed band? And he’s playing here tonight?”
“Yes. They got signed after they played America Rocks. I work for the label as the band’s assistant now.”
Brian put his hand on his forehead in disbelief. He turned to look at the line of people waiting to get into the venue. It grew since Jessi first came outside, and now circled around the corner.
“I had no fuckin’ idea. I’m really happy for Tommy. I can’t wait to see the show. I can’t wait to see Tommy again. Let’s go inside.”
“I can’t. I forgot my pass. That’s why the fans were telling the security guard who I am. Can you send someone out with my pass?”
“I can let you inside. C’mon.”
As soon as they got inside the venue, Jessi found her pass. It was on a small table near the door with her phone. No messages. Good. She would’ve gotten into a lot of trouble for leaving her pass haphazardly lying around and she needed to be on call at all times during an event. It wouldn’t have been a good way to start off her new job.
“Can you bring me backstage to see Tommy?” Brian asked.
“Sure. He’s going to be happy and surprised to see you.”
“Has fame changed him at all?”
It was a joke, but it still made Jessi stop short. “You mean you haven’t heard anything about Tommy and Angel?”
“No. Who’s Angel? The singer?”
Jessi chuckled. Brian had no idea about Tommy’s coming out. He was in for a big shock. She laughed again. “Tommy looks pretty much the same, but . . . you’ll see.”
Jessi escorted Brian backstage, past the production crew and past the general bustle of activity that went on behind the scenes. By the way he was staring at everything and everyone, she had the feeling it was Brian’s first time backstage.
The dressing room was busy with people, but she spotted Tommy talking to Damien and called him over. “You’re never going to believe who’s here.”
“Brian?” Tommy gave him a big bear hug. “I’m so glad you came to the show.”
“Look at you, a genuine rock star. I’m working tonight. I bartend here. I had no idea you made it big. Congratulations. I’m really happy for you.”
Jessi flagged Angel from the across the room. Maybe it wasn’t her place, but she was curious how Brian would react to the news of Tommy’s sexuality, and she was curious about how Tommy would handle breaking the news to Brian.
Tommy put his arm around Angel without inhibition. “This is Angel Garcia, my boyfriend.”
Angel shook Brian’s hand. “It very nice to meet you. Are you an old friend of Tommy’s?”
“Yeah. Wait. What?” Brian’s head snapped in Tommy’s direction. “Your what?”
Tommy smiled at Angel, the love showed brightly in his adoring gaze. “Angel’s my boyfriend.”
Brian shook his head slightly, like he didn’t hear correctly. “Did you just say he was your boyfriend?”
“Uh huh.”
Jessi never thought she would see the day when Tommy would casually tell someone like Brian, that he was bisexual.
“Wait a minute,” Brian rubbed his temple. “I have to grasp my head around this. Tommy Blade’s a rock star, and he’s gay?”
Tommy nodded. “Bisexual, but yeah.”
“Holy fuck. When did this happen?”
Angel chuckled. “I’d love to stick around and see the expression on your face when Tommy explains it to you, but I gotta warm up. It was very nice meeting you, Brian. Enjoy the show. I hope to see you afterwards.”
“I got to run too,” Tommy said, with disappointment, “but you’re going to be around all night, right? There’s a meet and greet after the show and some kind of private party.”
“Yeah. I’m bartending in the VIP area.”
Tommy gave Brian another bear hug. “I can’t believe you’re here.”
As soon as Tommy was out of earshot, Brain turned to Jessi for an explanation. “What the fuck is that all that about?”
“He never wanted anyone to know. It took Angel to finally make him come to terms with telling people.”
“Where do you fit in? Were you a cover to hide he’s gay?”
“Tommy’s bisexual. He’s not gay. We have a very sexual relationship.”
“And he has a boyfriend?”
“Yeah. Angel.”
“Is he bi too?”
“I wish.” She laughed. “No, Angel’s definitely gay. We’re really close. I call him my gay husband, but he’s only interested in Tommy.” But she was still determined to change that.
“And you’re OK with Tommy having a boyfriend?”
“I love Angel. He’s sweet and funny. He’s a great cook, a chef, actually, and he has a voice that can blow the roof off this place. He’s a great guy. And he makes Tommy really happy. He makes me happy too.”
“You share Tommy. How is that fair to you?”
Brian didn’t understand. It was the typical reaction, so she shouldn’t have been upset by his judgmental question, but she was. “I know it sounds absurd, but our relationship works. We share everything, including a bed. You’ll see. After the show.”
The meet and greet was quick. Tommy expected to be able to spend more time with the fans, but the production assistants handling the event hustled them along like cattle. It wasn’t fair. He needed to talk to someone about having more personal meet and greets. He was looking forward to the after party, though. He wanted to show off his boyfriend to Brian. He pondered the thought in his head, and it made him smile. Gone were the days when the risk of exposure immobilized him.
Initially, there was a flurry of commotion as soon as they were escorted to the after party, but it died down after a few minutes. There were a lot of people in the roped off VIP area. Audra and Kira were there, but the rest of the fans who purchased the upgrade were relegated to the main floor of the theater.
“Did you enjoy the show?” Angel asked Brian as he set up a round of drinks.
“It was fuckin’ awesome. Better than anything I’ve seen in a long time. Tommy, I never knew you could play like that. You were aces.”
Tommy was glowing. He didn’t know why he was looking for Brian’s approval, but he was, and he somehow felt vindicated. He was glad that any lingering animosity about his abrupt departure from Psychobabble wasn’t an issue with Brian. They never had an actually fight or end to their friendship. It just seemed to dissipate. “Are you still in a band? Still singing?”
“Yep. Still with Psychobabble.”
“You’re a singer too?” Angel asked.
“Yeah, but I’m more of a screamer than a singer. Real hardcore stuff.”
“That’s right. I forgot my boy, here, was a metal head.” Angel put his arm around Tommy and gave him a small, affectionate kiss.
Tommy waited for Brian’s reaction, but Brian played it cool even though Tommy knew that he was disturbed by their man on man kiss. He didn’t think Brian was homophobic, just shocked at Tommy’s bisexuality. It was ironic because back when they were in Psychobabble together, he would have died before he let Brian see him kiss another man. Now he openly boasted his relationship with Angel, and he enjoyed the shocked look on Brian’s face when he first learned about it.
Tommy kept his eye out for Jessi. He always did in a crowded room. He worried about her. It was habit born from his need to protect her. He didn’t know what she needed protection from, but he always wanted to know that she was within his field of vision and make sure she was OK. She was with Alyssa at the other end of the bar. She turned to him, and threw a kiss from her fingertips in his direction. He continued to watch her, just because he loved to look at her when she was unaware of his gaze, but she caught him.
She came over to him, and put her arms around his neck. “Why were you watching me?”
“Because I love you.”
“Aww.” She started kissing him, shoving her tongue deep into his mouth and pressing her breasts and pelvis against his body. She had a little too much to drink and, even though his hard-on was fighting him about it, he took her hands from around his neck and pulled her off him.
A few minutes later Jessi had another shot of tequila in her hand.
“Take it easy. You’re drinking too much.”
She rolled her eyes at him.
“I’m serious.”
“Stop worrying about me, baby. I’m fine. I’m just having a good time.”
He didn’t know what else to do. He didn’t want to make a scene and sound like a controlling husband, but he didn’t want her to get sick.
Angel patted his leg. “I’ll take care of it.” He walked up behind Jessi, and put his arms around her waist. “What do you got there, sweetheart?”
She leaned into him “A shot of tequila. Do you want one?”
“No. I want you to put it down.”
“Did Tommy send you over here?”
“Just give me the shot. No more, sweetie.”
She shook her head. It became a game of cat and mouse. Jessi dangled the shot glass in front of Angel, and she pulled it away just when he was about to grab it.
“You leave me no choice but to play dirty.” He grabbed her by the hips and pulled her close to him. He rubbed his body against hers, and gave her a deep, penetrating kiss. You could see Jessi melt into him. While Angel was still kissing her, he took the shot glass out of her hand and ran away with it.
Jessi threw her head back and laughed. She stomped her foot and shook her fist in the air. “You’re nothing but a fuckin’ tease, Angel Garcia!”
Angel won the game and put prize on the bar in front of Brian. “She’s cut off. No more shots for her.”
Tommy sighed with relief. “Thank you.” He only meant to give Angel a closed mouth kiss, but watching Angel kiss Jessi excited him, and he ended up giving Angel a long, wet kiss. The fans were getting quite the show tonight.
Brian was staring at them. “Holy fuckin’ shit.” He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I can’t believe what I’m seeing here tonight. Not only are you a rock star, but you’re gay. You let this guy stick his tongue down your wife’s throat, and then you thanked him. What the fuck else is going to happen tonight? Man, you really changed from the last time I saw you.”
Tommy knew Brian would be shocked. But he really didn’t change. He was still the same person, only now he was no longer a slave to his inhibitions, bound by the fears of rejection. He was finally free.
The show left Jessi too excited to sleep. She wanted to take in the glory of tonight’s success. Tommy and Angel were exhausted and already dropped off, so she was left staring at the ceiling, unable to think about anything except the energy of the crowd.
She still heard the cheers and the applause of the audience in her head. She didn’t want the night to end and wished Tommy and Angel were awake, but they needed sleep. They were all heading out on the tour bus in three days for the next show.
She didn’t realize she fell asleep until she suddenly woke, shaking and scared. She didn’t remember the nightmare that made her heart pulsate between her ears, but it left her frightened and anxious. She reached for Tommy to comfort her trembling body, but her hand fell on his empty pillow. She stretched her arm further and accidentally touched Angel’s cheek.
His eyes fluttered open.
“Where’s Tommy?”
Angel was groggy and his voice was mumbled. “Downstairs . . . working on a riff or something.”
She tugged on his shirt. “I had a bad dream.”
He never opened his eyes, but he extended his arm in her direction and invited her into his embrace. She snuggled up to his shoulder and his strong arm pulled her into his chest. His arms were longer than Tommy’s and it enveloped her in a protective semi-circle. Her fear quickly abated under Angel’s comforting touch. She heard his breathing deepen as slumber fell upon him, but his arm still hugged her tightly. She watched Angel’s broad chest rise and fall in the shadows that filtered in from the full moon. She slid her hand across his torso and lightly caressed his chest fingering one of his dark pink nipples. She watched his face for a reaction, but sleep obviously had Angel under its realm.
She ran her hand around his neck and pressed her body against his. The soft mound between her legs thumped at the closeness of their bodies. She reached up and kissed Angel’s sleeping lips. He surprised her by returning her kiss. She o
pened her mouth slightly and his tongue found its way inside. She held his cheek in place so he didn’t turn away, while reveling in his arms. It was just the two of them, sharing a kiss. She imagined they were lovers and their kiss was a prelude to their love making. Her hand moved to Angel’s chest and she fondled one of his nipples again. He smiled under their kiss.
Her mind was reeling. She wanted him. Maybe this was the incentive Angel needed to sleep with her. He continued to kiss her and she dared to move her hand lower, but hesitated. Tommy was missing and his absence left her with a huge wad of guilt. She didn’t want to sleep with Angel behind Tommy’s back. It was wrong without Tommy, but she had no control over the hand that slid down Angel’s taught abs. She cupped the bulge in his shorts and its softness disappointed her. He broke away from her kiss.
“Do you want to get Tommy, or should I?”
“I’ll get him.” As she padded her way down the stairs, she reminded herself that she needed to stop thinking about Angel in a sexual context. Their love life was complicated enough.
Chapter Forty-One
The tour bus was small and cramped and stuffy. It was understated and lackluster, but it was still a thrill to be touring. They already played shows in New Jersey, Maryland and Pennsylvania. Each show was a new experience and offered the opportunity to meet new fans.
Marissa rarely stepped foot on the tour bus. The label sent her from venue to venue in a private limo and she stayed at modest hotels. So, her arrival on the bus triggered everyone’s attention. They immediately quieted down and exchanged worried glances as soon as they saw her graceful figure making its way down the corridor of the tour bus.
“Good morning, everyone. I have a message from Mr. Ableman. He’s here, at our Connecticut office and he called an emergency meeting. We need to get there right away.”
The Prince of Punk Rock Page 25
