After a short walk, I finally stop in front of the kitchen door. I suck in a deep breath and encourage myself. I can do this. Perhaps the kitchen is deserted anyway and I’m stressing for nothing. I cautiously move inside.
Startled, I pull to a stop. Elaine is standing in front of me with a pleased grin on her face. She says, “I thought I heard you. Come and eat, there’s plenty.” How she knew I was coming is beyond me. I’ll dwell on that detail later; for now, I’ll grab some food and get out of here. Without another word, she turns to a metal box and rummages around inside.
Before I can voice the question in my head, Elaine speaks up. “You haven’t seen this before storage unit before, right?” What makes her think that? Why is she so sharp? At my brisk shake of my head she becomes thoughtful. “Well, it’s a storage unit for food, meats and dairy. It’s got electricity running though it so it keeps the food cold inside, and helps them last longer. It’s called a refrigerator.”
She opens the door wide and steps back to let me see inside. It has four shelving units with two small drawers on the bottom. How interesting. How does a metal box produces cold air? We had electricity in my village, but it was reserved for the Elders and families in the center rings of town. Even then, the electricity was for practical things like light and simple machinery. Never for a box like this… this refrigerator. The mechanics behind this box baffles me.
I take a cursory glance around the kitchen and find a wraparound counter with a small sink extending along the wall to the right and back. The trash compartment sits in the corner between the counter and refrigerator to the right. A small table and two chairs sit in the corner on the other wall by the door. An open doorframe stands next to the refrigerator and opens up into a large dinning space.
I stand back and wait for Elaine to finish whatever she was doing. Ideally, she’ll grab what she came for and leave. I could then make a quick grab for some food and head back to my alcove. Just my luck though; it doesn’t look as though Elaine plans on leaving anytime soon. Instead she simply moved to one side of the counter and leaned against it.
Her happy expression had soured into sadness. Part of me is tempted to ask, but the larger part of me doesn’t care. What business is it of mine that she’s unhappy? Besides, it’s not like she’ll tell me. I’ve dealt with enough shit in my life to know that in most cases it’s better to just not ask. If they wanted you to know, you’d know.
I ignore her stare and eye the food she laid on the counter instead. I flinch as an alpoh flies at me. The large purple fruit drops to the floor with a thud. I glance up at Elaine sharply, only to find her face apologetic. It’s so unexpected, I’m taken aback. It’s not like it hurt me or anything. She mutters out a small and meek “sorry” before looking down.
Uncomfortable and unsure of what to say, I change the subject. “Can I grab anything I want?”
She turns around and smiles brightly. This girl’s mood changes so quickly it’s giving me whiplash. You’d think I’d just sold her a village or something. I watch her nervously. She looks like she wishes to move closer when she takes a small step in my direction. I will my expression to be as harsh and unyielding to deter her.
Elaine merely places her hands behind her back. “Of course. I pulled out a bit of everything for you. I’m not sure what you like, but I figured this was a start. Help yourself. I’ll also keep you company while you eat. Ask me anything you want.”
That’s what I was afraid of. Unsure of what to say to combat that, I settle for keeping quiet. The sooner I grab something to eat, the sooner I can leave. I move forward and notice Elaine taking a seat at the table.
Ignoring her, I slowly pursue my choices. It’s been so long since I had the luxury of choosing; I take my time. I make sure to look over everything before settling on a plate of treli, a grilled dish with starches and vegetables, along with berka meat. This meal reminds me so much of home that I hesitated choosing it. Tears well up to my eyes but I will them back. I refuse to show any weakness while an Other is here.
With my plate filled, I pull out the chair opposite Elaine, scooting it as far back as possible without being obvious. She sits there with a simple glass of water, looking so pleased. Opting to ignore her presence, I reach for the fork. I stare at the plate in front of me, contemplating my next move. Is the food poisoned? Does it have needles in it? I don’t know if it’s entirely safe to eat, but I want it to be. After what feels like an eternity of staring and drooling, a movement across the table draws my attention.
Elaine reaches forward as I jerk back. Her hands close around another fork and she loads it with food from my plate and I’m tempted to growl. No one touches my food, ever. It’s mine and only mine, I don’t do well with sharing. Before I can snarl out an angry retort, realization dawns as I watch her. Her hand freezes right before her mouth. Once my attention rests solely on her, she brings the food the rest of the way to her mouth. Once she swallows the bite, she places the empty fork down. She smiles gently, gesturing to my plate. Still, I don’t move.
Elaine moves to the refrigerator once more. She fills a glass with water and takes a small sip. She places the glass next to me, then gestures to my plate again.
I can’t take it anymore. I shovel in a mouthful of food. After the first bite, I pause and wait. Not feeling any different, I pile the rest into my mouth, hardly pausing to breath. In no time, my plate is clean and Elaine replaces it with another helping. I glance up in surprise, and she looks amused. I demolish the second plate as well, then gingerly lean back and place a hand on my swollen tummy. It’s full for the first time in a very long time.
I’m so glad it wasn’t poisoned. That would have been cruel, even for the Others. You shouldn’t tease someone with food only to brutally take that option away. I silently thank the Gods.
I still can’t believe she tested it for me first. How had she known that’s why I hesitated? It could have been any number of things. Perhaps it was simply a luckily guess, but my gut tells me otherwise. Another detail to push aside. I mumble out a quick “thank you.” Her smile nearly breaks her face, it’s that wide. She looks so ridiculously happy, and it makes me feel like shit for being an ass before.
She takes my thanks as an opportunity to make small talk. “You ate so fast! I don’t even think you were breathing at one point. From the looks of it, I’d say you enjoyed it though?”
I mumble out a clipped yes before glancing away.
“That’s great. The kitchen is always stocked with food. Please help yourself whenever you’re hungry.” She continues, her word rushed. She probably thinks I’m going to run away. “If you want a specific meal, just ask Lenny. He’s the cook around here and he’s amazing. Whatever you want, he can make. You’ll like it here, you’ll see. We are all kind people here, Alanna, and my room is just three doors down from yours so we can talk whenever you need to. There’s….” she trails off as I stand and clear my dishes.
She quickly rushes over and takes them from me. I flinch slightly at the close contact. She either didn’t see or chooses to ignore it, but either way, I’m grateful. Despite my feelings about the Others here, she was kind when she didn’t have to be, even after my attitude towards her.
She quietly says, “I’ll take care of this stuff. You can go take a look around or meet some of the other talnarins here.”
I manage another small ‘thanks’ before leaving. I end up back in the room and, thankfully, managed to avoid contact with anyone on the way. I lock the door and sit down with my back to the door, bow still in hand.
Chapter 16
It’s been three days since I arrived. Thankfully, I only dreamt that one time and haven’t had any more mishaps with my memories since. I’ve mostly sat around, staying out of sight for the three days, and constantly keeping an eye out for any issues–or any talnarins. I’m more at ease at Craforian than I was before, but not enough that I want to continue to remain vulnerable and weak.
I’ve wasted
enough time. It’s time to talk to Abel about starting my training. I need to learn control sooner rather than later because who knows when something might happen. I need to be prepared.
I make my way to Abel’s office in the main building. When I raise my hand to knock, the door is thrown open. I take a few startled steps back and crouch into a defensive stance. Standing in the doorway is a talnarin in black clothes. The shirt is tight fitted, but the pants are baggy with various pockets. It’s very similar to the Others I saw in the forest all those months ago. Perhaps he patrols the area or is some sort of guard. He glances impassively at me before disappearing out of sight. That’s when I catch sight of his eyes. They’re vibrant yellow, nearly the color of the sun.
Once I’m certain he’s gone, I straighten and move back to the door. From inside, Abel commands me to enter. My anxiety surfaces, but I move inside the office.
Abel looks up from his desk and smiles. “Hello Alanna. What can I do for you?” Are you finding yourself settled in well?”
“I’m settled enough. I want to begin training.” My sentences are short and clipped. I cringe at my attitude—it’s ruder than I intend—but I refuse to be meek like the last time I was in Abel’s office. I watch him closely for any sign that I’ve overstepped a boundary. He appears completely unfazed. If anything, I’d say he looks slightly amused.
“Wonderful. As for your training, we can begin now, if you would like.” He looks at me expectantly. With my nod as confirmation, he stands. Once he’s around the desk, I follow him out the door, keeping myself at safe distance.
We come to a stop in front of the training arena where three people are currently practicing. At our arrival—whether it’s due to Abel’s presence or mine, I can’t tell—they’ve all stopped to stare at our entrance.
Utter silence. It’s unnerving and intimidating, and the attention making me slightly nauseous. Abel gestures to a male in the far corner of the arena. He jogs over and politely addresses the leader.
“Greetings Abel, what can I do for you?” His voice is deep, almost monotone, and his expression is devoid of any emotion. It’s strangely compelling, along with the strange smell of burning wood that I assume comes from him. The tight shirt he wears accents his muscles and abs. He’s at least a foot taller than me, which seems to be a trend with these Others. His hair is dirty blond and cut close to his head. This male has burnt orange eyes and a sharp chin. The same feeling I get looking at other talnarins emerges the longer I stare at this male. That feeling that there’s this other presence within the talnarins that makes them much older than they appear.
He catches me staring and I feel my face heat. I strive for nonchalance, but I’m pretty sure I fall short. Luckily, Abel greets back in the ever-present polite tone, drawing the male’s attention. “Hello Erik, this is Alanna. She is the new fire user we spoke of a few days ago. She has expressed her desire to begin her training today.”
“Very well.” Erik’s eyes shift my way. “It’s nice to meet you. Before we start, I need to know what you know. I need to know what you don’t know, too.”
Should I tell them I know nothing, or should I try to lie my way through it? The problem with that is I don’t know enough to lie myself through anything at this point. I shift uncomfortably. What will happen if I tell them the truth?
I decide to go out on a limb, “Well, I know I can set things on fire. Sometimes. And all of you have colored eyes. Not to mention the ears. There’s…” I trail off as I catch the strange look that Abel and Erik exchange. I clamp my mouth shut and internally berate myself. How could I have been so stupid. Think before you speak Alanna. Shit. I might as well have just claimed I was human once. To refer to Them as Them and not us was what stupid. A dumb mistake. Shit what now? How do I fix this?
Before I have a chance to blubber out an explanation and save myself, Abel says, “We will start from the beginning then. You will split your time between training and lessons. Erik’s brother, Benjamin, will aid you with your studies. I’ll send someone for him while you two get started.” Abel walks off to the side where the two other talnarins stand and quietly converses with them. In a matter of seconds, the two talnarins walks out of the arena.
Erik draws my attention and directs me to stand opposite of him. The floor is covered in sand, and I can only assume it’s because it absorbs blood better. That thought isn’t very comforting.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Abel take up a position against the wall near the large open doorway. I shift my eyes back to Erik as he begins speaking. “Have you ever called your power to you intentionally before?” I shake my head in response. “Summoning the energy can be taxing in the beginning. It will leave you exhausted and weak. It will take an impressive amount of control to call it forth and wield it without wringing you dry.” He rubs his hand down his head. “Aside from the energy manipulation, we will also train your physical body. I’ll run through a series of exercises I want you to do each day. This is going to help with your endurance and control. It also won’t hurt to start running in the mornings, but you can work up to that if it’s too much.” He shrugs nonchalantly.
“To start, we are simply going to practice drawing the energy forth to see where you stand with control. However, until you gain better control, I ask that you don’t practice alone. For your safety and the safety of those around you, only draw it forth when Abel, Benjamin, or I are with you, alright?”
I nod my consent, it’s not like I had planned to call it up on my own anyway. It terrifies me. These powers are a curse.
“Good. Once you gain enough control, we will move onto actually harnessing the flames. Once that’s successful, we’ll go a step further. The idea is to steadily increase the pace of the training until you can wield it your powers as wish. There is no rush. We go at your pace. Just remember, it’s about control and patience. Let’s start.” He holds his hand out, palm up.
I startle as burnt orange flames suddenly materialize in his palm. It’s a small flame, barely covering the width of his hand. All remaining doubts I have that this was all a dream, that these powers don’t actually exist, vanish. Seeing it in person is too much to ignore. It still seems surreal, flame sprouting from someone’s hands. Never had I thought that my life would take a turn like this. This wasn’t supposed to be my reality. This wasn’t supposed to be my future. And yet here I am, learning to control a power I don’t want. A power I despise because of what it reminds me of, because of what it means.
Yet, as much as I hate it, this isn’t the time to dwell on it. I’m here to learn control. I need control if I ever plan to destroy Him for good. And I won’t be able to control the flames with these thoughts overtaking my mind right now. I take a deep breath and will myself to calm down.
As I continue to stare at the flames, I notice another person has entered the arena. He had moved towards Abel the instant he arrived. Just as I’m about to turn and look, Erik calls me to attention, “Alanna, you need to focus. Imitate what I did, try to draw the flame onto your palm like this. Pull from your core and will the heat through your body. Think small and controlled now. Visualize what you want to see in your hand and will it to existence. Feel the slow buildup in your core but don’t pull all at once. Allow it access to your palm but show it the way in your mind.”
I close my eyes, considering what he said. He wants me to call on the heat inside. He wants to me to access the raging flames inside me? Why? Those can’t be controlled. It’s too angry, it’s too violent. I can’t draw from there, it would spiral out of control in no time. Maybe I don’t have to draw from this so-called core. Perhaps I can draw from somewhere else, a place not as powerful or dangerous.
I think of simple heat and flames and I will it to form in my palm. I repeat this process twice more before I open my eyes and look at my empty palm. I glare at the offending limp and scream inside my head for the fire to form. Clamping my mouth closed, I squeeze my hand into a fist. There’s no way I can give u
p now, I just started. I can do this. I won’t let myself fail. I tentatively stretch my will inside me, searching for the heat in my center.
Like an old friend, it slowly uncurls in my stomach to say hello. As it stretches, a moment of panic hits and in seconds, the feeling fades. It’s almost as if it was never there in the first place, that I imagined it all. I tentatively look at Erik, uncertain of what his reaction will be.
His eyes are zeroed in on my now open palm. Did he notice something different about me? Does he know that I’m not really a Talnarin? Why is he staring? I did something wrong, didn’t I? I messed up somehow, I just know it. This is it, they’ll kill me now.
I’m shaken from my internal panic at his approach. I watch cautiously as places his palm above mine. He leaves just enough room so that his hand doesn’t make contact with my skin. He looks down on me and commands, “Try again. This time focus on the energy and just familiarize yourself with it. It’s alive inside you, it has a will of its own. You need to understand your energy like you understand yourself. The two of you need to be in tune with each other. Your wills need to be one. Don’t focus on drawing from it yet. You need to communicate with it first. It won’t respond the way you want until you attempt to understand it.”
I nearly scoff out loud. How ridiculous this all sounds, getting to know “it.” I’ve always sort of referred to the fire as its own entity for the sake of my sanity. I just never knew that “it” was a living thing taking refuge inside me. I don’t want to get to know it. This power is dangerous and out of control. I don’t want to know it. But unfortunately, I might have to.
Chapter 17
After lunch, very sweaty and weary, I make my way to the library where Benjamin said he’d be waiting. Benjamin looks similar to Erik except for the eyes, hair, and body structure. Where Erik is bulky, Benjamin is leaner and less sturdy looking. Benjamin also has blood red eyes and blond hair reaching his shoulders. Still, the relation between them is evident and it’s the first time I’ve seen twin talnarins. Ironically, their scents are nearly identical as well. Benjamin smells woodsier.
Fractured Past (A Talnarin Novel Book 1) Page 9
