by Gary Paulsen
“Amos, I may be onto something big. Help me down.”
“Get up, Amos. We’re going to be late for school.”
“I can’t. I’m sick.”
“Quit fooling around. We’ve got work to do.”
“I’m too sick. I was fine when I went to bed. But then I started thinking about school and all the ways Slasher could rearrange my body, and I started throwing up. Big chunks. My mom heard me. She said I don’t have to go. So I’m not going.”
“But Amos, I told you about finding the silver bead and the piece of paper. Don’t you want to put a stop to this guy once and for all?”
Amos sat up. “If you’re right—and you rarely are—I have even more reason to stay in this bed.”
He plopped back down on the pillows.
“I need your help, Amos. If Slasher and his gang are the stereo thieves, it’s our civic duty to put them out of business.”
“Why don’t you call the cops? This is their line of work, not ours.”
Dunc sighed. “I’ve explained all that to you. We know the silver bead came off of Slasher’s jacket. And we know that green slip of paper is a tally sheet for the stereos. But the cops only have our word for it. We’ve got to get some solid evidence to tie the gang to the crime.”
Amos pulled the covers up to his chin. “If you want to play boy detective, go right ahead. But I’m sick. I may be sick for a few days. Weeks. Maybe years. You can never tell about these things.”
Dunc waited a few minutes. He hated to do it. But he knew it was the only way. He started walking toward the door.
“Okay, Amos. I understand. No hard feelings. I was sure you’d want the reputation, though. Because of Melissa and all.”
Amos moved toward the end of the bed. “Reputation?”
“Sure. When we get through, it’ll be all over school how you got the best of Slasher Davis. I mean, it would have been all over school.”
Amos swung his legs over the side of the bed. “I suppose anybody who got the best of Slasher would be a kind of hero, wouldn’t he?”
“I suppose.”
“And Melissa would probably hear about it, wouldn’t she?”
“Probably.”
Amos started to get dressed. “Like I always say, no guts—no glory.”
He tied his shoes and hurried past Dunc. “Come on. What are you waiting for?”
“Amos?”
“What? What’s the matter?”
“Before you go for the glory, don’t you think you’d better put your pants on?”
“All things considered, aren’t you glad you went to school today?”
Amos snorted. “My head is covered with noogie bumps. My life has been threatened. And you think I should be glad? I should have stayed right here in my room, that’s what I should have done.”
“Don’t let Slasher’s little threat worry you.”
“Little? He said if I don’t have his homework tomorrow, he’s going to cut me up in small pieces and flush me. I don’t consider that a little threat.”
Dunc leaned against the wall. “After we get through, he won’t be around to threaten anybody. You’re sure it was tonight?”
“Spit told Crusher they were going shopping in the mall parking lot tonight. Shouldn’t we call the cops now?”
“Not just yet. Tonight, after they go for another stereo, we’ll follow them. When we find out who the buyer is, then we’ll call the police.” Dunc looked at his watch. “We’d better get going. We don’t know what time they’re coming. We need to find a good place to hide.”
They made good time getting to the mall. The parking lot was about half full. There would be cars parked there until midnight, when the last movie ended.
They looked around for a hiding place. Everything was out in the open.
Almost everything.
“You call this a good hiding place?” Amos shook his head. “A Dumpster. Have you noticed that we spend a major portion of our time with garbage? Doesn’t that seem strange to you?”
Dunc looked over the side. “It’s clean. And you can watch the whole parking lot from here.”
“What do you mean, I can watch? Where are you going to be?”
“I’m going to cruise up and down on my bike. I might be able to spot them when they first pull into the parking lot.”
Amos folded his arms. “Why do I have to hide in the garbage while you ride around in the open?”
“If they see you, they might get suspicious. If they see me, they’ll think I’m just another kid on the way to the mall.”
Amos climbed into the Dumpster. “Somehow I knew you’d have it covered.”
Dunc pulled away. “Whistle—I mean, call if you need me.”
The Dumpster was fairly empty. A few boxes and plastic bags were piled in one corner. Amos stood in another corner and watched the parking lot.
He watched cars and people until he thought his eyes would pop out. He had been watching for over two hours, and the gang still hadn’t shown up.
The door of the Dumpster rattled. Someone was opening it. Amos crouched in the corner. A man wearing a white apron tossed in some pizza boxes. He barely missed Amos. Then he threw in a big plastic sack full of old spaghetti and salad.
This time he didn’t miss.
Amos pulled a lettuce leaf off his head. Some of the spaghetti stuck in his hair.
“This is it. I’ve had enough.”
He started climbing out when Dunc rode up.
“What happened to you?”
“Don’t ask.”
Dunc helped him down. “I’ve spotted them. Slasher is in that blue car on the fifth row. Get ready.”
They watched the gang spread out to look for security guards. Slasher was fast. He was in and out in three minutes. The gang met him by the stop sign with his bike. They took off down the street.
Dunc started after them. “Come on, Amos.”
They followed at a distance. The first stop was a pawnshop called Fast Eddie’s. Slasher was only inside for a few minutes. Apparently Fast Eddie didn’t need any stolen car stereos today. Slasher stuffed it under his jacket and rode off.
The gang took off again. This time they headed for the waterfront. They rode straight to the old store without stopping. Slasher kicked the door open and walked in.
Dunc pulled over a few blocks from the store. “We’ll go around back. It might be possible for us to hear something from the window.”
“Haven’t we got enough to call the police? We could go on home and let them take care of it from here,” Amos argued.
Dunc chewed his lip. “We could do that. But we’re already here. It won’t hurt to listen. Just a couple of minutes, then we’re gone. I promise.”
They hid their bikes in the bushes and quietly inched up to the window. Amos boosted Dunc up.
He could see the gang sitting in the circle. They were discussing their next move.
Apparently Fast Eddie bought from them once in a while, but most of the time it was another man—an important businessman who sold car stereos and electronics in a fancy store uptown.
Dunc memorized the information. He was ready to go. He started to step down.
An alley cat had been eyeing Amos. She could smell the spaghetti on his clothes. First she rubbed up against his leg. Then she jumped up onto his shoulder and licked his face.
Amos let go of Dunc, which left him hanging from the window ledge. The cat started yowling and dug her claws into Amos’s back. He was turning circles trying to reach her.
Someone jerked the cat off.
“Look what we have here, boys! A couple of peeping geeks.”
Slasher pushed Amos toward the door. “Get the Brain!” he barked over his shoulder.
Dunc dropped to the ground and followed Amos inside the building.
Slasher took out his switchblade and clicked it open. He pointed it at the couch. “Have a seat, geeks.”
Amos looked at Dunc.
Slasher pointed the knife
at Amos. “What are you doing down here, Barf Bag?”
“That’s Dirt Bag,” Amos corrected. “Would you believe we were out for a late-night bike ride, and of all places we ended up here?”
Spit, the short one with his name shaved in his hair, stepped over. “Like, that’s a major coincidence, man.”
Slasher shook his head. “Shut up, stupid. Anybody with half a brain can see they’re down here spying on us.”
Amos leaned over and whispered in Dunc’s ear, “That leaves him out.”
Spit’s shoulders drooped. He put his head down and stepped back.
Slasher started cleaning his fingernails with the switchblade. “We can’t have you geeks talking to the cops now, can we? What are we gonna do with you? Anybody got any ideas?”
The front door flew open.
“We may have a few.”
It was the two Mafia guys from across the street. “You punks get up against the wall and spread ’em. You have the right to remain silent ….”
Dunc was reading the newspaper in his room. “ ‘Car stereo burglars nabbed by police. Ring busted wide open. Prominent businessman in custody.’ ”
“It figures they wouldn’t mention us,” Amos said.
“I guess they already had Slasher and his gang under surveillance. They probably thought we were just in the way.”
Amos picked up the newspaper. “They wouldn’t have gotten the main buyer if it hadn’t been for us.”
“That’s true. But if those two undercover cops hadn’t been there last night, we might have been in serious trouble. And there is one other consolation.”
Amos yawned. “What’s that?”
“Slasher won’t be bothering you anymore.”
“That part’s good. But I was hoping Melissa would hear about it and fall at my feet in hero worship. Then we’d get married sometime next week and live happily ever after.”
“I’m sorry things didn’t work out for you, Amos.”
“Oh, well. At least this whole thing hasn’t been a total loss.”
Dunc looked surprised. “Why, Amos. I’m proud of you. I thought you’d really be upset about not getting your name in the paper and all. I think you’re taking a very mature outlook on this.”
Amos put his hands behind his head. “Yeah, that’s me. I’m a mature sort of guy. Besides, I still have Amy’s diary. She’s promised to do all my chores for the next year if I’ll give it back. I’m still thinking about it. I think I’ll let her beg and grovel at my feet for a while.”
Dunc grinned. “A real mature guy …”
Be sure to join Dunc and Amos in these other Culpepper Adventures:
The Case of the Dirty Bird
When Dunc Culpepper and his best friend, Amos, first see the parrot in a pet store, they’re not impressed—it’s smelly, scruffy, and missing half its feathers. They’re only slightly impressed when they learn that the parrot speaks four languages, has outlived ten of its owners, and is probably 150 years old. But when the bird starts mouthing off about buried treasure, Dunc and Amos get pretty excited—let the amateur sleuthing begin!
Dunc’s Doll
Dunc and his accident-prone friend Amos are up to their old sleuthing habits once again. This time they’re after a band of doll thieves! When a doll that once belonged to Charles Dickens’s daughter is stolen from an exhibition at the local mall, the two boys put on their detective gear and do some serious snooping. Will a vicious watchdog keep them from retrieving the valuable missing doll?
Culpepper’s Cannon
Dunc and Amos are researching the Civil War cannon that stands in the town square when they find a note inside telling them about a time portal. Entering it through the dressing room of La Petite, a women’s clothing store, the boys find themselves in downtown Chatham on March 8, 1862—the day before the historic clash between the Monitor and the Merrimac. But the Confederate soldiers they meet mistake them for Yankee spies. Will they make it back to the future in one piece?
Dunc Gets Tweaked
Dunc and Amos meet up with a new buddy named Lash when they enter the radical world of skateboard competition. When somebody “cops”—steals—Lash’s prototype skateboard, the boys are determined to get it back. After all, Lash is about to shoot for a totally rad world’s record! Along the way they learn a major lesson: Never kiss a monkey!
Dunc’s Halloween
Dunc and Amos are planning the best route to get the most candy on Halloween. But their plans change when Amos is slightly bitten by a werewolf. He begins scratching himself and chasing UPS trucks—he’s become a werepuppy!
Dunc Breaks the Record
Dunc and Amos have a small problem when they try hang gliding—they crash in the wilderness. Luckily, Amos has read a book about a boy who survived in the wilderness for fifty-four days. Too bad Amos doesn’t have a hatchet. Things go from bad to worse when a wild man holds the boys captive. Can anything save them now?
Dunc and the Flaming Ghost
Dunc’s not afraid of ghosts, although Amos is sure that the old Rambridge house is haunted by the ghost of Blackbeard the Pirate. Then the best friends meet Eddie, a meek man who claims to be impersonating Blackboard’s ghost in order to live in the house in peace. But if that’s true, why are flames shooting from his mouth?
Amos Gets Famous
Deciphering a code they find in a library book, Amos and Dunc stumble onto a burglary ring. The burglars’ next target is the home of Melissa, the girl of Amos’s dreams (who doesn’t even know that he’s alive). Amos longs to be a hero to Melissa, so nothing will stop him from solving this case—not even a mind-boggling collision with a jock, a chimpanzee, and a toilet.
Dunc and Amos Hit the Big Top
In order to impress Melissa, Amos decides to perform on the trapeze at the visiting circus. Look out below! But before Dunc can talk him out of his plan, the two stumble across a mystery behind the scenes at the circus. Now Amos is in double trouble. What’s really going on under the big top?
Dunc’s Dump
Camouflaged as piles of rotting trash, Dunc and Amos are sneaking around the town dump. Dunc wants to find out who is polluting the garbage at the dump with hazardous and toxic waste. Amos just wants to impress Melissa. Can either of them succeed?
Dunc and the Scam Artists
Dunc and Amos are at it again. Some older residents of their town have been bilked by con artists, and the two boys want to look into these crimes. They meet elderly Betsy Dell, whose nasty nephew Frank gives the boys the creeps. Then they notice some soft dirt in Ms. Dell’s shed, and a shovel. Does Frank have something horrible in store for Dunc and Amos?
Dunc and Amos and the Red Tattoos
Dunc and Amos head for camp and face two weeks of fresh air—along with regulations, demerits, KP, and inedible food. But where these two best friends go, trouble follows. They overhear a threat against the camp director, and discover that camp funds have been stolen. Do these crimes have anything to do with the tattoo of the exotic red flower that some of the camp staff have on their arms?
Dunc’s Undercover Christmas
It’s Christmastime! and Dunc, Amos, and Amos’s cousin T.J. hit the mall for some serious shopping. But when the seasonal magic is threatened by some disappearing presents, and Santa Claus himself is a prime suspect, the boys put their celebration on hold and go undercover in perfect Christmas disguises! Can the sleuthing trio protect Santa’s threatened reputation and catch the impostor before he strikes again?
The Wild Culpepper Cruise
When Amos wins a “Why I Love My Dog” contest, he and Dunc are off on the Caribbean cruise of their dreams! But there’s something downright fishy about Amos’s suitcase, and before they know it, the two best friends wind up with more high-seas adventure than they bargained for. Can Dunc and Amos figure out who’s out to get them and salvage what’s left of their vacation?
Dunc and the Haunted Castle
When Dunc and Amos are invited to spend a week in Scotland,
Dunc can already hear the bagpipes a-blowin’. But when the boys spend their first night in an ancient castle, it isn’t bagpipes they hear. It’s moans! Dunc hears groaning coming from inside his bedroom walls. Amos notices the eyes of a painting follow him across the room! Could the castle really be haunted? Local legend has it that the castle’s former lord wanders the ramparts at night in search of his head! Team up with Dunc and Amos as they go ghostbusting in the Scottish Highlands!
Cowpokes and Desperadoes
Git along, little dogies! Dunc and Amos are bound for Uncle Woody Culpepper’s Santa Fe cattle ranch for a week of fun. But when they overhear a couple of cowpokes plotting to do Uncle Woody in, the two sleuths are back on the trail of some serious action! Who’s been making off with all the prize cattle? Can Dunc and Amos stop the rustlers in time to save the ranch?
Prince Amos
When their fifth-grade class spends a weekend interning at the state capital, Dunc and Amos find themselves face-to-face with Amos’s walking double—Prince Gustav, Crown Prince of Moldavia! His Royal Highness is desperate to uncover a traitor in his ranks. And when he asks Amos to switch places with him, Dunc holds his breath to see what will happen next. Can Amos pull off the impersonation of a lifetime?
Coach Amos
Amos and Dunc have their hands full when their school principal asks them to coach a local T-ball team. For one thing, nobody on the team even knows first base from left field, and the season opener is coming right up. And then there’s that sinister-looking gangster driving by in his long black limo and making threats. Can Dunc and Amos fend off screaming tots, nervous mothers, and the mob, and be there when the ump yells “Play ball”?
