Villanova was beautiful, especially in the fall. The old buildings spoke of a history, and the cathedral on campus was nothing short of artwork itself. The trees and the dorms and the mums all completed the picture perfectly. I passed the statue of Mother Mary and smiled, huddling into my oversize hoodie a little more.
Winter was coming.
As I pushed through the doors that led me to food, my stomach rumbled. Last night’s pizza had hit the spot, but I’d worked most of it off with my nerves. Being with Chase when he wasn’t acting like a complete ass had been…weird. It was hard enough not wanting him when he was being a prick, but when he was talking to me like I was a human with real feelings, it was next to impossible. I didn’t know what it was about him that drew me in. Was it his utter inability to be kind? Was it the way he always laughed off anything nice about himself? Or maybe it was because, deep down, I suspected it was all an act, and he wasn’t nearly so bad as he liked to make me believe.
A girl like me would never survive against a guy like him, and his father would be all too happy to remind me of that fact yet again if I was stupid enough to forget it. Chase would eat me up. Swallow me whole. Leave me for a more suitable version of myself. And yet, I still ached to kiss him anyway, just to see how it would feel.
How pathetic was that?
“Thank you,” I said to the girl behind the register after I swiped my card.
She smiled at me. “Have a nice day.”
“You, too.”
Gripping my tray, I headed for my favorite seat by the window…only to come up short because it had already been claimed. By him. I hadn’t seen Rick in almost a year. I hesitated, not sure what to do. He hadn’t noticed me, so I could turn around and head for the other side of the cafeteria—
He lifted his head and spotted me. Crap.
When he saw me, he frowned and looked almost as unhappy as me. Almost. “Taylor, is that you?”
No. I’m just a hologram. “Hey…Rick. How’s it going?”
Rick had been my one attempt at a real boyfriend. We’d been okay for a while, but then he’d kept trying to pressure me into more than I was ready for, and I’d pushed back, digging in my heels to maintain control. He hadn’t liked that, so he dumped me. I hadn’t seen him since. To be honest, I didn’t even know he went here.
I wished he didn’t.
This campus was big, but it wasn’t big enough to avoid people you didn’t want to see—and I didn’t want to see him. At all. Forcing a smile, I adjusted my grip on my tray. “Hey. How’s it going?”
“Good.” He stood, wiping his hands on his jeans. “You…go here?”
He couldn’t hide his surprise.
Of course, he knew well enough how little money I had, and how much this school cost. He was rich—not as rich as Chase, but still up there—and I’d tried to ignore the fact that the two of us made no sense together, because I’d liked him a lot.
I had thought he liked me, too.
Guess I was wrong.
The first thing he’d said to me when we broke up was that I wasn’t in his class, and it never would have worked between us. It had hurt more than him breaking it off because I wouldn’t let him get his hand down my pants when he asked.
One thing I could control.
The other I couldn’t.
“Yeah.” I took a step closer. “I didn’t know you did, either.”
He nodded. “Dad went here, too, so…”
Of course, he did.
He hesitated then gestured to the empty spot at his table. “Do you want to sit with me? I’m almost done, but we can catch up.”
“No, no thanks,” I said in a rush. “I’m, uh, meeting someone.”
He cocked his head. “Who?”
“A friend.” I glanced around the room, desperate for a familiar face, but most of the tables seemed empty…until I spotted a guy sitting in the corner, out of view, playing on his phone. I wasn’t sure whether to cry or laugh, because as far as escapes went, this wasn’t much better than the current guy I was stuck talking to. “Him. Over there.”
He followed the way I tipped my head, and his eyes widened comically. “Chase Maxwell?”
“Yeah.” I tried to ignore the small surge of satisfaction I had at shocking him. I could see it written across his face in bold letters. Who could believe that Chase Maxwell knew who a girl like me was? “It was nice seeing you,” I lied.
He cleared his throat. “Yeah. You, too.”
I headed off toward Chase, and I could feel Rick’s eyes boring into my back the whole way. He was probably watching to see if I’d made it up. Part of me wished I had, because I wasn’t awake enough or prepared enough to deal with Chase after last night.
Ready or not, here I come.
He must have sensed my approach, because he looked up from his phone and caught me halfway there. He frowned, giving me a once-over. He wore a pair of sweats, a hoodie like me, and a baseball hat. It was as dressed down as I’d ever seen him, despite the name brand quality of the clothing he wore.
My heart pounded as I headed toward him, not sure if he was in a good mood or not. If the truce was over and he wanted to be alone, he would make that very clear.
And Rick would think I lied.
“You’re up early,” he stated, moving his tray out of the way so half the table was cleared.
Well, guess that was an invitation. Looked like I wouldn’t be making a fool out of myself in front of Rick today. “So are you.”
“I’m always up early on Saturdays.”
I set my tray down and sat. I risked a glance at Rick, who was watching me, just as I’d thought. The second he saw me notice, he sat back down, his back to us both.
“Who is he?” Chase asked, his tone a little hard.
“Huh?”
“That guy you were talking to.” He crossed his arms. God, he looked hot in a baseball hat. It had the Villanova V on it. I wanted one, but I hadn’t saved up enough cash yet. Chase had, like, ten in his room. “Who is he?”
“An ex.” I picked up my spoon. “I had no idea he went here.”
He checked him out, his frown deepening. “He looks like a douche.”
“He is,” I agreed, sliding my spoon into my fruit bowl.
“Then why’d you date him?”
I played with the blueberry on top of a strawberry. “I guess I hoped I was wrong about him.”
He snorted. “Let me tell you a little secret about guys. Whenever we look like a dick and act like a dick? Guess what? We’re a dick.”
I laughed. Like, legit laughed. “I’ll try to keep that in mind.”
He said nothing, just took a bite of his oatmeal.
I did the same.
After a few minutes of companionable silence, I broke it. “Why are you always up early on Saturdays?”
“I have a thing I do.”
I pursed my lips. “What thing?”
He shifted a little in his seat, as if he didn’t want to answer. “Why are you always up on Saturdays?”
“I like to walk on the campus when it’s quiet,” I admitted. “Everyone else is asleep, and it’s so pretty, and I know how lucky I am to be here at all, so I don’t want to take a second of it for granted. So, every Saturday morning, I wake up early to remind myself of how lucky I am…” I broke off, my cheeks heating. “That sounds lame, doesn’t it?”
He swallowed. “It’s not lame at all.”
“I guess not,” I muttered, toying with my food.
We fell into silence again.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
He set his spoon down, flexing his jaw.
Clearly, I’d overstepped my boundaries. I wasn’t his friend. He didn’t like me. He tolerated me so he could get good grades, and that was it. “Never mind—”
He stood, checking his phone. “Come on.”
I blinked up at him. “Huh?”
“I said”—he held a hand out to me—“come on.”
I didn’t move
, despite his extended hand to help. “Where are we going?”
“You want to know why I’m up early every Saturday?”
I nodded.
“Then come on.”
Swallowing, I slid my hand into his, letting him pull me to my feet. As soon as I was up, he let go, as if he couldn’t wait to break the contact. We both grabbed our trays, and we got rid of our trash then made our way outside.
We passed Rick, who still openly stared, and Chase smirked. Without warning, without hesitation, he put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close, kissing my temple. I barely contained my gasp, and the second we were out of sight he let go of me.
“What the hell was that?” I asked, my voice strained.
I could still feel his lips burning a hole in my skin.
He shrugged. “I thought he should know you weren’t available anymore so he didn’t get any ideas.”
But I was. Just not to him.
Chapter Six
Chase
I shouldn’t have brought her here.
What I did on Saturdays was my business and mine alone, and yet all it had taken was her batting her bright blue eyes my way and a confession on how lucky she was because of my father, and I’d been willing to take the one thing that I had for myself and expose it to someone else. Doing this was all me. I did it because I enjoyed it.
I didn’t need someone judging me for it.
Pulling up to the Radnor High School parking lot, I parked and let out a breath. The familiar maroon and white uniforms washed across the football field, and children from eleven to thirteen warmed up in preparation for the game. We were playing Springfield today, and stakes were high. Last time we’d been up against them, we lost by three points. We wouldn’t make that mistake again.
The team that I coached was waiting for me in a huddle, probably pumping each other up like I’d taught them. One of the moms walked by, spotted me, and waved.
Smiling, I returned the greeting.
“What are we doing here?” Taylor asked slowly, staring at the field. “Do you come here to watch the games? To watch kids play?”
“Something like that.” I pulled my whistle out of my cup holder and turned toward her. “If you don’t want to stay, I can call you an Uber.”
She licked her lips, undoing her belt. “I’ll stay.”
This was stupid. I never should have invited her along. This was my thing. My escape from being a monster. No one else’s. Why the hell would she want to watch me coach a bunch of kids in a game I could no longer play? “Seriously, you can go—”
“Chase?” she broke in, placing her hand on my thigh.
I stiffened beneath her touch. “Yeah?”
“I would love to stay.”
Nodding, I opened the door. “Then let’s go.”
She got out, too, and came around the front, smoothing her hair.
Smirking, I touched a piece of it. I loved her hair. It was so bright, soft, and long. The bounce was fun to play with. I tugged on a piece, watching it pop right back into place. “Your hair looks fine, relax.”
“No, it doesn’t.” Flushing, she stopped touching it. “I should have brushed it this morning. The wind blew it all over the place—”
Taking my hat off my head, I plopped it down on hers. “There. All better, no one can see.”
She bit down on her lip. Jealousy over a pair of teeth hit me hard. “You don’t have to give me your hat.”
“I don’t mind.” I held my hand out to her for the second time that day. “Come on.”
This time, she didn’t hesitate. She just slid her hand inside mine, and something between us changed. Bringing her here, showing her this piece of myself, did that.
I couldn’t ignore that I’d chosen her for a reason.
Despite my best efforts to keep my distance, to not give a damn about her, she’d wormed into my life and I couldn’t shake her. I might not want her there, and she might not actually want to be there, either, but it was what it was.
She was in my life.
And I was in hers.
That didn’t mean I was going to fall in love with her, or beg her to be mine, but I didn’t necessarily have to be an asshole to her, either, right? Couldn’t we just be…
Friends?
“So, what, you just sit and watch games all day?”
I swallowed. “Actually, I coach.”
“What?” she exclaimed.
“Yeah. I coach B-team football at Radnor.” I stole a glance at her, tightening my grip on her hand. “We’re undefeated so far this season.”
She nodded, checking out the football field. “Which team is yours?”
“Maroon and white.”
Her steps matched mine perfectly as we climbed down the hill next to the field. “How old are they?”
“Fourth through sixth grade.”
She smiled. “Are those little cheerleaders?”
“Yeah, they compete and stuff.”
“That’s so cute,” she said, her voice sincere.
I didn’t say anything. Showing her all this, telling her my secret, was opening myself up to scrutiny and vulnerability. It wasn’t easy, and I didn’t particularly like it. My stomach churned, and I was seconds from calling her an Uber and telling her to fuck off. Guess I was more of an asshole than I thought, because that would be easier than this.
“They’re all so cute.”
I flexed my jaw. “The kids are all cool.”
“And the parents…?”
“I’ve had no problems. I had to do a pretty extensive background check, and I had to prove I wasn’t convicted of any crimes. I didn’t race him that night. I was trying to stop him. He shouldn’t have been driving…” I broke off, feeling like a fucking fool. I stopped walking and dropped her hand. What the hell was I doing? Did I really think we could be friends? That this thing between us could be more than a paid arrangement, with my father the monkey in the middle? “This was stupid. You should go.”
“I’m not going. And Chase?” She touched my inner arm. “I believe you.”
I ran my hand down my face. “Taylor—”
“I know how hard it was for you to bring me here,” she said. “It’s easier to push me away, right?”
How did she know that?
“Taking a step in letting me in, that was huge, and scary, but don’t let it stop you. I told you I’m here to help you with school and anything else you need. You’ve been shutting people out for way too long. It’s time to let someone in.”
I gritted my teeth. “And you’re the person I should let in?”
“I am.” She touched my bicep. It was an innocent touch. Barely there. Yet it shook me in ways that all the name-calling in the world never had. “You can trust me, Chase. I swear.”
I wanted to. That was the fucked-up part. Even though she was here because my father paid her to be, I wanted to believe that there was more to it than that.
That she actually cared.
“Coach Chase?” a familiar voice said from behind me.
I tore my attention off the girl trying to kill me, and focused on my quarterback. “Yeah?”
“Can you show me that play we went over one more time?” He side-eyed Taylor, then tugged on his glove. “I don’t want to mess it up.”
“Sure, Mikey.” I clapped him on the back and pointed to the bench where I’d be sitting. “You can sit behind that bench, Taylor. We’ll be over there.”
She smiled. “Good luck.”
“Thanks,” I muttered, leading Mikey away.
“Is she your girlfriend?” he immediately asked as I led him toward the bench.
“No.” I rubbed the back of my neck. “She’s just my…my…” Friend? Tutor? Employee? Shit if I knew.
“She’s pretty.”
I thumped him on the back. “She’s too old for you.”
“You never know,” he said, grinning. “She might like younger guys.”
Shaking my head, I refused to feel jealous of a
kid who was braver than me when it came to Taylor. “Let’s go over that play, okay?”
Chapter Seven
Taylor
Monday morning, I covered a yawn as I entered our early morning class. I’d been up late last night working on my paper alone in my room. I managed to grab a power nap before my alarm went off at seven. I pushed my glasses up on my nose as I made my way to my usual spot, yawning again.
Chase wasn’t in his place yet. I hadn’t seen him since Saturday afternoon. After his game finished, he’d been in high spirits, since his team won. We’d gone out to eat, and he had insisted on paying for my food. He’d gone on and on about every play that had worked, and those that hadn’t, and his mood had stayed high all afternoon…
Until it hadn’t.
I still didn’t know what triggered his abrupt change, but one second we’d been laughing and talking about his quarterback, and the next he’d been quiet and sullen.
Maybe I said something wrong? Did something?
He’d avoided me ever since. Even when I texted him about studying last night, he blew me off and told me it was all under control.
“Hey.” A guy I vaguely recognized stepped in front of me. He had brown hair and bright blue eyes. But why did I know him…? Ah yes. He was in two of my classes. Cute enough, I supposed, if you liked that boy-next-door look. “Taylor, right?”
I blinked at him and smoothed my hair. I’d skipped makeup and, you know, a brush this morning, so I probably looked horrible. “Uh, yeah. Hi…um…?”
“Ryan.” He grinned. “How’s it going?”
“Good.” I looked over my shoulder, not really listening. Where was Chase? “You?”
“Better now that you’re here.”
Okay. That got my attention. “Why?”
“You’re pretty and talking to me.” He tilted his head to the side. “Isn’t that a good enough reason?”
I snorted. This guy was too much. It was too early for some guy to be testing out corny pickup lines on me. “You don’t even know me.”
The Backup Plan (Back in the Game) Page 6
