“Seriously, you should come. It’ll be fun, informal. If you’re not doing anything. My way of making it up to you for forcing you to stay late,” Jack said as he slipped his jacket on. I watched the way his hands rose up to tighten his purple tie. My throat had suddenly gone very dry, it was like I couldn’t breathe anymore.
My brain was telling me to stop. To just turn around and walk out of that door and not look back; but my feet were refusing to move. I had no reason to accept this invitation. I needed to put some distance between us. The last thing I needed was to spend any more time with Jack than necessary.
He was watching me with eager eyes, smiling and waiting for my answer.
“I really shouldn’t,” I replied in a weak, squeaky voice.
Jack laughed before he walked around the desk to me. “C’mon, Louise. I dare ya,” he said with a laugh in his voice which made me blush. He was proving to be a bad influence on me, but I could hardly resist it. Everything he said sounded delicious, like a treat. I had spent all my life following rules, living by a code that Father had set out for me. Going out for drinks with Jack and his friends would be in complete violation of that code, but I was feeling adventurous.
“Okay,” I squeaked and Jack smiled widely before he led the way to the door.
“Fair warning: any stories the boys tell you about me are all lies,” he said with a laugh and held the door open for me.
I rolled my eyes as I walked out and he followed. With every step I took beside Jack, a feeling was rising up inside me — one that told me I was losing complete control.
Chapter 14 - Jack
Was it just me or did Louise look like she was actually having fun? Who would have thought — Louise Downing, sitting at the bar with a bunch of Brooklyn boys and laughing at every nonsensical joke the guys made. She had her hair down, her blue eyes were shining, and she was sitting on a high barstool with her legs crossed. She had her usual martini glass in her hand, and it was her third one.
My friends Marty, Gus, and Liam were telling her about the time that we stole poor Mrs. Henley’s flower pots and how she had chased us down the street with a flyswatter in her hand.
Louise was laughing till she snorted while Gus described the scene to her, doing an slo-mo swatting motion with his hands. “Did she eventually catch up with you guys?” Louise asked, holding her as if in pain from all the laughing.
“No, she didn’t. She was nearly seventy,” Liam replied, throwing back the remainder of his beer.
“But we returned the pots to her porch the next day, and she pretended like she hadn’t even noticed,” Marty exclaimed and Louise bit down on her lip as she smiled.
I was standing between them amongst the barstools, and I had noticed the way she had stolen a few glances at me through the night. I didn’t think she would actually agree to come here. This bar, my friends . . . None of this seemed to be her scene.
It was the first time that I was seeing Louise in such a relaxed atmosphere, and it gave me a different perspective of her. This was the woman who I had always assumed to be too prudish to invite me to her apartment, but she had surprised me by doing just that. She had always seemed too stuck up to enjoy herself in the company of guys like Marty, Gus and Liam. But this was not an act; Louise was truly enjoying herself. She was just full of surprises, and if I didn’t want her enough already, now I wanted her even more.
I clapped my hands together to divert the attention to me again.
“Well, boys, looks like it might be a little too late to order another round of drinks,” I declared.
“It’s only midnight. What are you talking about, Jay?” Gus exclaimed.
“We haven’t even started our round of darts yet!” Liam added.
“I wouldn’t mind another martini,” Louise said in a softer voice, and our eyes met. She had a smile on her face. It was like she was egging me on to stay.
“Right! What was I thinking? We haven’t even played darts yet,” I said and Louise jumped off the stool and followed the others to the corner of the bar where the board was set up.
Liam stayed behind to order some more drinks while the rest of them started a round. Louise admitted that she had never played darts before. She was laughing as Marty decided to show her. I watched Marty position himself behind her. He threw his arms around her to help her hold her hand in position.
I could feel pangs of jealousy creep up on me. I gritted my teeth and clenched my fists as I watched them standing close together. Louise’s delicious butt grazed against Marty’s thighs and I cleared my throat loudly. Neither of them seemed to notice.
Louise threw her first dart in the air and it missed the board altogether. The two of them burst into laughter just as Liam brought a tray with all our drinks.
“She’s rad!” he said to me, trying to make himself heard over the loud music in the bar.
“You still say that?” I turned to him and plucked my beer off the tray.
“What? Rad? Of course, I do!” he laughed and we clinked our bottles together.
“Anyway, the point is that she is amazing. I can’t believe you work with her,” Liam commented and I followed his eyes to where Louise was standing. This time, it was Gus who was trying to show her how to throw darts the correct way. The three of them were drunk and laughing loudly while Liam and I watched them.
“Yeah, I can’t believe it either. We’ve been in the same company for nearly eight years together,” I told my best friend, who looked at me with his brows crossed.
“And you haven’t banged her yet?” he remarked with a smirk. I gulped down some of the beer in response.
“She’s a colleague, man,” I said, but I didn’t deliver those words too convincingly. Liam raised his eyebrows disbelievingly at me and shook his head.
“You fucking like her, don’t you?” he asked and I jerked my head away from him.
What was that supposed to mean?
Louise’s shrill laugh rang out near us as she attempted throwing another dart, which narrowly missed the bull’s eye this time.
“It’s true . . . You like her,” Liam continued and I shook my head.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, man. Just shut the fuck up,” I growled and Liam thudded my back violently.
“It’s fine, Jay. You don’t have to tell me. I can see it on your face. It’s written all over. You like this woman enough to not bang her in the past eight years,” he said, and with those words, he walked away from me and joined the others.
I watched them talking and laughing as they tried to drunkenly play darts. Louise threw me a look over her shoulder, and even her eyes were smiling. I was happy to see her having a good time, to see her enjoying herself . . . but Liam’s words had taken a hold of me.
What if it was true? That nothing had happened between Louise and me in the past eight years because I liked her, I had feelings for her, and I was too afraid to find out what those feelings would lead to?
It was too late now. I had already experienced what it was like to be between her knees, and now I was a goner.
Chapter 15 - Louise
This was probably one of the most surreal nights of my life, and I couldn’t believe that it was coming to an end. Jack had pointed out to the rest of the group that it was nearly two in the morning and we all had work the next day. That broke up the party really quickly, and here I was, standing outside a bar with four men I would never have imagined I could get along with.
Liam and I exchanged quick hugs, while Marty and Gus gave me hugs that lasted a little longer than necessary.
“C’mon, guys. Break it up already.” Jack peeled Marty away from me and we all laughed – except Jack, who seemed to be very concerned about the time.
We were all drunk and we’d had a good time, and I wasn’t too bothered by the fact that Gus and Marty had flirted with me all night. Jack’s jealousy was written all over his face, and it gave me a little kick. Despite how normal our meeting in his office had been, it fel
t good knowing that other men’s attention towards me was capable of making him feel jealous.
The others eventually took their leave — or, rather, Jack pushed them away. After which, it was just him and me.
“I don’t think you should be driving in this state!” I exclaimed with a giggle once the others were gone.
Jack looked devastatingly handsome with his loosened tie and his hands tucked into the pockets of his tailored pants. His hair was uncharacteristically ruffled by this time of the night, and the dark strands of hair that fell over his eyes added a boyish charm to his handsome face.
I’d had three martinis too many, and I was definitely not sober anymore.
“I’ll walk you home,” Jack said, and he started walking ahead of me without waiting for me to follow.
“Wait up!” I said and burst out laughing for no reason. Even though I was aware of how much of a complete fool I was making of myself, I had no control over my behavior anymore. The alcohol had completely taken over me.
“I have a meeting at nine in the morning and I hope to be awake for it,” Jack shouted without waiting for me or looking over his shoulder at me.
I could sense that he was distressed about something, and I tried to keep a handle on myself as I followed him.
I had never met more carefree or funny people than Jack’s friends before. Men like them had always been out of my reach till now. They just didn’t belong to my family’s social circle, and now I could see that I had really missed out. I had more fun tonight with Jack’s friends than I could ever hope to have with any of my own friends, and I wanted to thank him for inviting me. But Jack kept walking far ahead of me. He wasn’t even turning around to see if I was keeping up with him.
“Jack! Hey, Jay!” I shouted at him and covered my mouth as little giggles escaped my lips.
Jack stopped when he heard me use his childhood nickname and then turned slowly to look at me. “Maybe you shouldn’t call me that,” he said, and I heard a change in his tone of voice. One that I had never heard before.
My laughter died pretty quickly as I came to a stop beside him.
“What?” I asked, hoping that I would be able to stand still for a few moments. I desperately wanted to get out of my heels.
“Jay. I don’t think you should be calling me that,” he said in that same deep, firm voice. There was a hint of anger in it that I didn’t understand.
I was still drunk, though, and even though I could detect a change in his behavior, I couldn’t control the loss of control my mind felt under the influence of so many martinis. “Why? Are you embarrassed by your nickname?” I asked and burst into another volley of giggles again.
Jack blinked at me. His handsome face looked dark and narrow as he stared into my eyes. “No, Louise, I am not embarrassed by it . . . I’m your boss and I don’t think it would be appropriate for you to have a nickname for me,” he growled.
My throat had suddenly gone very dry and I gulped. I didn’t know what I had done wrong or why his mood had changed so drastically and suddenly. “You’re the one who invited me to this thing!” I blurted, and Jack clenched his jaws and nodded his head.
“Yes, I am aware of that,” he replied gruffly and I shook my head.
“And you’ve spent the whole night barely even talking to your friends. You made me feel like you didn’t even want me there!” I shouted at him and Jack drew in a deep breath.
“That didn’t stop you from getting real close to my friends, though, did it?” he replied smoothly and mouth fell open. I couldn’t believe what he was saying to me. Was he accusing me of flirting with his friends? The very ones he had introduced me to?
“Fuck you, Jack Gowler,” I snarled. Whipping around from him, I ran across the road to the other side and kept running in the direction of my apartment building. I could sense that he wasn’t following me, and I was glad he didn’t because I knew that I could break into tears at any moment. I ran as fast as I could in my faintly drunken state to my apartment, and once I was safely inside, I sat down on the floor and allowed myself to sob softly.
I couldn’t understand what was happening to me. The man who I thought I didn’t even like was driving me crazy, and all because the truth was that I was falling for him.
Chapter 16 - Jack
I woke up the next day with a dull, aching throb at the back of my head. When I checked the clock on my bedside table, I saw that it was ten already, which meant that I’d missed the morning conference call.
This had never happened to me before. No matter how late the night got or how much I had to drink, I was always on time for work and fully capable of getting the job done. Last night, however . . . Last night had been different. After Louise ran from me, I didn’t feel like the same man anymore.
Cursing loudly, I sat up in bed. I wasn’t even drunk the previous night. I had barely had anything to drink . . . And yet, this headache wouldn’t go away.
I couldn’t get Louise’s words out of my head. Fuck you, Jack Gowler, she had said. And she had every right to throw those words at me. I had treated her with disrespect. I was the one who had invited her to a night out with my friends, and then I’d spent the entire time sulking in the background. Even though I wanted to be glad that she was having fun, I couldn’t stop being jealous.
I couldn’t stop watching her every move from the corner of my eyes and wishing that it was me she was standing close to and not Gus. That it was my shoulder she was touching casually and not Marty’s. I couldn’t blame my friends either. I had made it very clear to them that Louise and I weren’t sleeping together. I’d pretended like I wasn’t even interested in her . . . So, technically, she was fair game. It wasn’t their fault that she was beautiful and intelligent and had a great sense of humor. If I’d told them that I wanted her, that I was falling for her, they would have kept their distance from her.
I kicked my bathroom door open just so that I could feel some pain. I brushed and shaved and showered and changed. I was going through all the usual motions of my morning routine, but I felt lifeless. I couldn’t stop thinking that all my chances with Louise were now destroyed. I was rude to her when she was having a good time, and now she would never look at me the same way as she had in her apartment that night.
I ran a hand through my hair as I stood in the middle of my bedroom. I couldn’t decide which tie to wear or which cufflinks to put on. I was dreading seeing her again in the office. I wasn’t sure how my body would react to her presence, but I couldn’t stay home today. I had meetings to get through and the Medusa deal to work on.
Feeling like shit, I drove to the office. My eyes darted around the place as I crossed the lobby to the elevator, hoping that I wouldn’t bump into Louise. I felt like I needed some space from her. Things had spun out of control too quickly for comfort.
I rode the elevator in silence and alone and when the doors pinged open, Louise was on the other side. She had files under her arm. Her face changed the moment she saw me.
Without a word, I stepped out of the elevator and she stepped in. I got a whiff of her perfume as she passed by me and I couldn’t stop myself from turning to look at her.
The doors were closing, and my eyes scanned her face. She was staring right at me, her blue eyes small and deep. Her cheeks were flushed to a bright red, matching the color of her firetruck red lipstick. She was wearing a pair of dark formal pants and a sleeveless fawn-colored blouse. I watched as her breasts rose and fell. I could sense that she was breathing hard, trying to keep her growing anger in check. She was still mad at me, and she had every right to be. As the doors closed and she disappeared out of my sight, I saw her look away from me and at her watch. Like she wasn’t even interested in looking at me anymore.
I’m sorry. The words rose up in my throat too late. The doors shut and the elevator was zooming down. I remained standing in front of the doors, staring blankly at the spot where Louise was standing just moments ago. I knew I should have apologized. I should have explained wh
y I’d acted the way I did the previous night.
She needed to know that I was nothing more than a jealous fool – that my friend’s insightful observations had struck a chord in me. It had taken me eight years and one fleeting night in her apartment for me to realize what I should have known all along: that I was in love with Louise Downing. It was more than just an animalistic desire for her perfect, petite body. I was in love with the woman and I just didn’t know it.
Turning from the elevator, I walked towards my office.
I needed to figure out how to tell her how I felt. She needed to know that I would never be happy – that I couldn’t continue to work in this office, hold this position, see her every day — unless she was mine.
“Mr. Gowler.” My secretary stood up from her chair as I approached her desk beside my office.
“Morning,” I mumbled, still lost in thought.
“Roger Tracker from Medusa is in your office, sir. He insisted on waiting for you there. He said that he has something important he needs to discuss,” she told me.
Chapter 17 - Louise
Once the elevator doors closed, I felt like I could finally breathe again. Seeing Jack in that moment had made me freeze up. I couldn’t look away, I couldn’t say anything. I felt weak and spineless — not something I was used to feeling.
I wasn’t sure what had happened to me the previous night, why I had broken down crying like that. I blamed the alcohol. Being drunk had made me act in a stupid way. Never in my life had I cried over a guy before, so why was I starting now? And because of Jack Gowler, of all people.
Till a few days ago, I hadn’t even considered myself attracted to him. I’d thought that he was nothing more than a show-off who also happened to be good looking. Now, ever since that night in my apartment when I’d made the mistake of inviting him upstairs, I couldn’t get him out of my mind. How did he know exactly what to do with my body to make me come so quickly? Why couldn’t I stop imagining what his cock would feel like inside me? I felt like I was going insane just thinking about him.
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