by Lara Deloza
Dedication
For Wendy, my sister from another mister,
who gives me the courage to keep typing.
Contents
Dedication
One: Alexandra
Two: Alexandra
Three: Sam
Four: Alexandra
Five: Sam
Six: Alexandra
Seven: Alexandra
Eight: Sloane
Nine: Alexandra
Ten: Sloane
Eleven: Alexandra
Twelve: Sam
Thirteen: Alexandra
Fourteen: Sam
Fifteen: Alexandra
Sixteen: Sloane
Seventeen: Alexandra
Eighteen: Alexandra
Nineteen: Alexandra
Twenty: Sam
Twenty-One: Sloane
Twenty-Two: Ivy
Twenty-Three: Alexandra
Twenty-Four: Sam
Twenty-Five: Sloane
Twenty-Six: Ivy
Twenty-Seven: Alexandra
Twenty-Eight: Sloane
Twenty-Nine: Sam
Thirty: Alexandra
Thirty-One: Sloane
Thirty-Two: Ivy
Thirty-Three: Alexandra
Thirty-Four: Sloane
Thirty-Five: Ivy
Thirty-Six: Sam
Thirty-Seven: Alexandra
Thirty-Eight: Ivy
Thirty-Nine: Sam
Forty: Sloane
Forty-One: Sam
Forty-Two: Alexandra
Forty-Three: Sam
Forty-Four: Sloane
Forty-Five: Ivy
Forty-Six: Sloane
Forty-Seven: Sam
Forty-Eight: Sloane
Forty-Nine: Sam
Fifty: Alexandra
Fifty-One: Ivy
Fifty-Two: Sloane
Fifty-Three: Alexandra
Fifty-Four: Alexandra
Fifty-Five: Alexandra
Fifty-Six: Alexandra
Acknowledgments
Back Ad
About the Author
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
ONE
Alexandra
Some girls are born to wear a baseball cap without an ounce of irony. Think of those long-legged, gamine creatures whose tans are never fake-baked, whose shoulders are broader than those of their boyfriends, and who tend to have a pair of blindingly white sneakers they save for “dress up.”
Some girls are born to wear a beret, or its sloppy cousin the beanie. Universal symbols that scream “I’m a bohemian—no, really, I am!” These are the girls who believe they belong in the spotlight, only to end up in someone else’s shadow every single time.
Some girls are born wanting so desperately to blend in that they spend hours trying to coax their locks into one of those messy-bun-and-elastic-headband combos that are so on-trend. Only these girls a) look like every third person and b) are not fooling anyone because the amount of effort they exert in trying to look effortless is obvious.
And I won’t even talk about those girls hiding behind thick bangs, dyed black and ironed straight. As if a curtain of hair could mask the pain and self-loathing that run so deep, they’ve turned parts of their bodies into lines of scar tissue.
You may wonder why I have such strong opinions about such seemingly trivial things.
It’s because I have to. It’s my job to size people up. To see what’s hiding beneath the surface—and then use that to my advantage.
You see, I am not like any of those girls.
No, I was born to wear a crown.
TWO
Alexandra
I spend fifth period the way I always spend fifth period: stuck in a mint-green box of a cafeteria, besieged by an army of clichés.
Samantha and I are seated at our usual table, one of only three rounds in the entire room.
There are enough chairs to accommodate eight people, but I’ve opted not to invite anyone to join us today, not even Matt.
This is because Sam and I have serious work. On Monday, the students of Spencer High will nominate candidates for this year’s Homecoming court. Principal Frick will post the official ballot by the end of the day, and once she does, the campaigning is on. I, of course, am a shoo-in; I’ve served as class princess every year since I was a freshman. But this year’s different.
This year, I’m going to be queen.
I wiggle my fingers in Matt’s direction and offer up an appropriately coy-yet-demure smile. My boyfriend grins and, despite being sandwiched between a six-foot-four-inch running back and three-hundred-pound wide receiver, Matt blows me a bona fide kiss. His teammates don’t even give him shit about it, because both of them have wanted to bone me for years. I cast my eyes downward, deepen my smile, and coax my cheeks to flush pink. Matt can’t take his eyes off me. But neither can Sam, for that matter.
Yes, I am the future Homecoming Queen of Spencer High, and my underwear model–hot boyfriend is both quarterback and captain of our nationally ranked football team. Together, we’re not only high school royalty, we’re the stuff of legends.
Does this make me a cliché, too?
Maybe. But clichés are the currency of the world. At the end of the day, I’m the one other girls aspire to be, the one every straight boy—and at least one not-so-straight girl—dreams of being with.
I look up and catch Sam frowning in Matt’s direction. Her new distaste for him aggravates me. She’s been like this since junior prom—the night I granted Matt full passage to my promised land. As though the first eight months of our relationship didn’t matter to her, or at least didn’t matter as much. Sealing it with sex? That apparently mattered.
I thought she understood. But perhaps I shouldn’t have given her so much credit.
“Hey,” I say softly, snaking my hand over to Sam’s to give it a little squeeze. “You okay?”
Her head whips back to my direction and she pulls her hand away. “Yes. Of course. Why?”
“No reason.”
Sam sighs and opens her pink plaid notebook to a fresh page. “We only have four days left,” she says. “It’s going to be tight.”
“Three,” I correct.
“Oh, right,” she says. “Today’s Thursday.”
I nod. “Natalie Night.”
“Three days,” she affirms. “Very tight.”
Homecoming is a big deal at Spencer High, and winning queen has been a part of the plan for as long as I can remember. There was a story published in the local paper—this was years ago—claiming that every Miss Indiana for the past three decades was a former Homecoming Queen. It’s not true. There’s no documentation anywhere that proves this. But for whatever reason, the story stuck with my mother. Winning Homecoming Queen is No. 13 on her quite literal (not to mention ridiculously long) list of things I need to do in order to one day become Miss America.
I know there are other ways to get out of this small town. With my grades, extracurriculars, and standardized test scores, I could get a scholarship to just about anywhere in the country. But I don’t want something as mundane as college to be what carries me away from Spencer. I was born for bigger things.
Natalie grew up thinking she was born for bigger things, too. But despite her movie-star good looks and hip-switching famous gait, the highest she ever got was second runner-up in Miss Indiana. I already know that I am better than her, but it doesn’t stop me from wanting the crowns to prove it.
Sam starts making a list of prime locations to hang my campaign posters so that we’ll know how many to make. She’s got this covered, so while she talks herself through the process, I tune out and survey the room. Our back corner table offers the best possible vantage point. From this angle I
can see Sloane Fahey sipping on a diet pop and staring lustily in my boyfriend’s direction—as if freckle-faced gingers posed any kind of a threat. Across the aisle from her, poor Ivy Proctor lunches alone, surrounded by a force field of empty chairs. She does an admirable job of acting like she doesn’t care that her only companion is a library book.
Then there’s Taylor Flynn, the chubby junior who’s spent the last two years pretending that she and the ratchet bunch of misfits that make up Spencer High’s a cappella group are, in fact, cool—a delusion perpetuated by pop culture portrayals of show choir. She pops up from her table, wiping tears from her mascara-streaked eyes, and makes a beeline for the door.
“Taylor!” I call out as she passes by. “What’s wrong?”
Taylor stops dead in her tracks. Slowly, she turns to face me.
“Nothing, Alexandra,” she says. “I’m fine.”
“Are you?” I ask, knitting my eyebrows, feigning concern. “You don’t look fine.”
She swallows hard, then says, “Mr. Willis just told the Spattertones that our fall concert’s been canceled. Something about a budgeting snafu. You know how Frick is.”
“Oh, no. That’s awful.”
She nods vigorously in agreement, then bursts into a fresh round of tears. “I had three solos!” she practically wails, little lobes of back fat jiggling with each sob. “And Gramma already booked her flight from South Dakota. She’s going to be so disappointed!”
It’s hard not to feel sorry for Taylor. I mean, I wasn’t trying to ruin her life when I got Sam to convince her mother, the head of Spencer’s Parent Teacher Organization, that the Spattertones concert was scheduled too close to our fall musical. Nor was Taylor an intentional target when I whipped Mrs. Mays, the World’s Most Dramatic Drama Club Coordinator, into a frenzy over the idea that Evita would suffer if the audience was diverted by the promise of quirky covers of their favorite pop songs.
But this is my senior year, and so help me God, I will be Eva Perón in front of a sold-out house. Taylor’s just an unfortunate—but necessary—casualty.
“You know,” I say, “you could join the chorus of Evita. Then your grandmother would still be able to see you perform. It wouldn’t give you three solos, but—”
“It’s something,” she finishes for me. “Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea.”
“Of course, I’ll put in a good word with Mrs. Mays for you.” I wink. “You know how she adores me.”
“Thank you, Alexandra.” Taylor is finally breathing steadily again. “You’re so . . . kind.”
She says this last word like she’s surprised by it. Not an entirely unexpected reaction.
For the record, there are precious few people in this school I genuinely like. And there are even fewer who genuinely like me, although nearly all of them, if asked, would say they did.
This is because the majority of my classmates know that I am someone they’re supposed to like. I have the ear of every teacher, coach, and administrator here. I make things happen at this school. I am someone they want on their side.
Taylor sniffs back the last of her tears. “I’m going to go talk to her right now. Thank you, Alexandra. Seriously—thank you.” She flashes me a grateful smile.
Taylor lumbers away on what I’m certain will prove a fruitless mission. Mays has had her show blocked and choreographed since before school started. No way will she want to work in extra cast members now. But my “willingness to help”? It throws Taylor off my scent.
“One goal accomplished,” Sam says in a low voice. “Now can we please focus? We’ve got a campaign to win.”
THREE
Sam
By the time the bell rings, our list is fairly complete. And it is long.
In addition to creating and distributing campaign posters, there are several events for which we’ll need to prepare. The nominations go live about a month before the Homecoming dance, which is where the voting takes place. In between there’s the pep rally assembly, where each of the candidates is interviewed onstage, and the Homecoming game itself, where the candidates make short, unscripted speeches during halftime, on a prompt pulled randomly from a box.
The Q&As aren’t where queens are made, though. That all happens outside of the spotlight. Casual conversations in homeroom. Circulating the tables at lunch. Sucking up to the right people during after-school activities. Harnessing the power of social media.
“Looks like we have our work cut out for us,” Lexi says, and by “we” I know she means “you,” because—let’s face it—I’m the one who will be doing 90 percent of the work for her Homecoming Queen campaign. Just like I’m the one who’ll be writing her paper on A Streetcar Named Desire for AP English tonight, while she’s off logging time with Natalie.
Matt insists on walking us to class every day, even though his next one is in the exact opposite direction. Then he lingers so long that he literally has to run the length of the school if he wants to make it to World History before the final bell.
The halls are fairly wide, but so are Matt’s shoulders. I imagine he has to take out a few people on his way.
He suctions himself to Lexi’s side, wrapping one heavily muscled arm around her and hoisting her Marc by Marc Jacobs backpack onto the other. Together, and despite Lexi’s slender frame, the two of them take up a lot of space—so much so that I always end up trailing a few steps behind.
Everyone’s so busy waving at Lexi and fist-bumping Matt that no one ever notices me. They’re like Power Couple Camo.
But it’s fine. I can see more from here. And there is so much to see.
Matt’s on the shorter side for a QB, only about five foot ten, but what he lacks in height he makes up for in genetically perfect everything else. Dark caramel hair he keeps military-neat for football, then grows out in the off-season. Big brown eyes framed by lashes almost as long as Lexi’s. A pouty poem of a mouth that always seems to be smiling, even when it’s not.
Just Google “Channing Tatum high school pictures” and you’ll get a pretty decent idea of what I’m talking about.
And then there’s Lexi. Lexi, whose legs go on for days, despite the fact that she barely clocks in at five foot six. Whose long, raven mane flows down her back like shiny black water. Whose sapphire eyes look photoshopped even when she’s standing a foot in front of you. Whose lollipop pink lips are plump and perfect even when they’re naked, without so much as a hint of gloss.
They taste pretty sweet, those lips.
When we reach Mr. Banerjee’s class, Matt and Lexi assume their standard position—Lexi leaning against the wall, Matt leaning into Lexi. I duck around them and head inside. I’ve seen that show too many times to need another encore. Here’s how it goes: things will be whispered, giggles will be exchanged, and if there are no teachers in the hallway, spit will be swapped. It happens, exactly this way, every. Single. Day.
What doesn’t happen every single day is a New Girl sighting. So I’m beyond surprised to see Mr. Banerjee deep in thoughtful conversation with a pint-sized prepster who does not look at all familiar. She has chin-length, strawberry-blond hair and two dimples punctuating the sides of her smile.
They’re too far away for me to read their lips, and I don’t want to get caught staring, so I pull out my copy of Streetcar and pretend to read, sneaking glances whenever I can.
Lexi slides into the desk next to me. “Who the hell is that?” she whispers.
I shrug. “Never seen her before.”
“Is she wearing a skort?”
I stifle a snicker. “Yeah, I think so.”
Lexi never loses her sunny smile, but her eyes have darkened. She doesn’t like surprises, and we’ve somehow made it all the way to sixth period without hearing a single word about this particular New Girl. That’s on me. Lexi’s made it very clear; it’s my job to keep an ear to the ground at all times. With a mom in the PTO, that’s usually pretty easy.
I start to whisper an apology when Lexi lifts her hand to silence me. “
She’s cute,” she says mildly.
“I guess.” I shrug. “If you like that sort of thing.”
She turns to me, the corners of her lips quirking upward. “Not your type?”
I blink, not sure I want to respond. The bell rings then, ending the uncomfortable exchange.
Mr. Banerjee and the New Girl move to the middle of the room. “Class, I’d like you to meet Erin Hewett. She is a new senior and comes to us by way of San Diego, California. Erin, please introduce yourself.”
Erin’s cheeks pinken just a smidge. Despite what I said to Lexi, I do think she’s kind of adorable, skort and all.
“Hi, everyone,” Erin says with a little wave. “I, um, just moved here, like Mr. B. said. My mom’s family is from Indiana, though, so I used to visit lots when I was younger. Um, I was supposed to start the school year here, but there were some real estate . . . issues? Anyway, I’m happy to be here now. Oh, and I might be cheering for the Spartans! I’m, um, a tumbler.”
There’s something totally disarming about the way Erin delivers this monologue, and it’s immediately apparent that more than one boy takes notice.
Lexi raises her hand, and Mr. Banerjee calls on her. “I just wanted to say welcome. I’m Alexandra, and if there’s anything you need, I want to personally offer my assistance.”
“That’s really sweet,” Erin says. “Thank you, Alex.”
I flinch. Lexi hates it when people call her that. “Do I look like a boy?” she’s apt to snark, as soon as they’re out of earshot. Of course, she’s the one who got everyone to call me Sam back in second grade.
“Alexandra,” Lexi corrects in a friendly tone, never once breaking character.
“Alexandra,” Erin repeats. “Gotcha.”
There’s something almost dismissive in the way she does this. Just a whiff of condescension, but I can tell it’s there, and, if that diamond edge in her eyes can be believed, so can Lexi.
Erin takes a seat in the middle of the room. Lexi and I exchange glances. I can tell she’s thinking the same thing:
We are going to need to keep our eyes on this one.
FOUR
