The scruff of his jaw scratched my neck as he spoke. “I’m going to hurt you now, Lo. Is that what you want?” he growled, his hard length pressing roughly against my back.
A mixture of fear and adrenaline coursed through me as the opening of my sex clenched in anticipation. I nodded slowly, and he pushed my face down into the blanket forcing my thighs apart with his. I braced myself for him, and his first thrust sent me reeling. Pain seared into me, and I screamed as he slammed into me relentlessly. My nipples, already sensitive from his mouth, throbbed from the friction of the blanket beneath me. I bit my lip, and my mind went blank as the pain began to subside and somewhere outside myself I heard my own voice screaming out.
“Yes! Fuck yes! Fuck me harder!” I slammed against him thrust for thrust as the orgasm rocked my body and squeezed around his cock until I felt him spasm, filling me completely with spurts of his warm soothing fluid.
His heart was pounding in his chest when he lifted me back against him. His arms circled my stomach, and he rubbed his face in my hair. When I tried to move he held me tight.
“Tell me now that we weren’t meant to be together.”
My voice was barely a whisper. “Parker, I...” I couldn’t deny it. The emotions, the pleasure that he gave me…it was overwhelming. Every part of me wanted him, wanted everything about him. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I had to squeeze them shut tightly before they spilled over and opened the flood gates that I fought so hard to keep closed.
“Shh, you don’t have to say anything. I already know the answer. I’m the right man for you, Lo. I always have been. I know you don’t see it now, but you will soon enough.”
Ten
REVELATIONS
“Lo, what in the hell are you doing out here?” The sound of Jake’s voice jarred me awake, and I peeled my face from the patio chair to blink up at him and absorb my surroundings. It was sunrise.
“I don’t know. I must have fell asleep,” I stuttered looking around, “I had some wine and…”
He ran his hand through his hair then gripped the railing of the balcony as he looked out at the beach with his lips pressed together in a thin white line. What the hell was HE doing out here?
I scrambled to gather my thoughts. Damn it, Lo! How could you fall asleep with the scent of Parker all over you? Panic set in as I began to recall what happened just a few hours before. Parker walked me to my suite. I remembered feeling emotionally and physically exhausted and sitting in the chair on the balcony for a minute listening to the sound of the waves and…
I breathed a sigh of relief when Jake turned and walked into my suite closing the door behind him. Grateful to have a moment to gather my thoughts, I closed my eyes as I sank back into the chair. Jake was never one for conflict, and right now I was thankful, but lately when I needed him most he would just shut down. At times his silence hurt worse than any words he could possibly say.
A confusing mixture of guilt and anger swept over me as I thought about how we’d grown apart. I tried to justify things in my mind—financial stress, our demanding jobs, but things between us had been tense for almost a year now. The more I focused on The Grand, the more distant Jake became. He spent more time at work, even taking jobs out-of-town. I’d grown bitter over his lack of support, and sometimes my moods switched between loving him and hating him in a matter of days. There were times I wondered why we were even considering marriage anymore, and after last night I was questioning it more than ever.
The thought made me panic. Jake and The Grand were the only two things I could count on in my life, besides Nina. Jake was there for me when my father remarried, and the day I got the shattering news that he had a heart attack at work. He was by my side through the funeral and all the days after when I could barely manage to drag myself out of bed. We loved each other, and back then I was sure he was the man I wanted to marry someday. So why did it suddenly feel like everything was changing?
Maybe we were just going through a rough spell. All couples go through them at one point or another. And what happened with Parker…as much as I wanted to call it a mistake I couldn’t. It was closure. Nothing more nothing less. I needed to close the door on his chapter in my life in order to move on, and in a few short hours Parker would be hundreds of miles away, and everything would be back to normal.
I tried to convince myself, but deep inside I had a nagging feeling that somehow things would never be the same. Our relationship had been unraveling slowly, long before seeing Parker again, so why was it so hard to admit? Could my fear of being alone be keeping me from facing the truth? Maybe Jake and I no longer wanted the same things.
I blinked back tears as the red warmth of the sun shined through my eyelids. The thought of facing Jake made my head pound harder, and my entire body throbbed like I had been run over by a truck. It would take every bit of energy to peel myself from the chair. And then what? Should I confess and beg for forgiveness? My heart pounded until adrenaline finally forced me to my feet. I didn’t know what to say, but there was one thing I was sure of. I wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible.
I froze the moment I slid the door open, and my breath hitched at the sight of him leaned over the counter with his head in his hands, waiting.
“Lo, what the hell is wrong with you? You’ve been drinking too much, hardly sleeping. I don’t even remember the last time we had sex…” his voice trailed off. Sex! Ugh! Why did he have to bring that up?
Thankful he didn’t push for details about last night, I quickly followed his lead. “I know,” I replied, trying to keep my voice from betraying my anxiety level, “I’m working on it, Jake. I’m trying some new ideas, and things are starting to turn around. Once I get The Grandview back on track we can focus on us again. You’ll see.”
He gave me a look as if to say ‘I don’t believe you’ then hesitated like he was struggling to hold back the rest of his thoughts. I stood crossing my arms in a silent shield that willed him to keep his distance, then breathed a sigh of relief when he turned toward the door without looking back.
“I came home to grab some clean clothes. Looks like I’ll be staying on the job until sometime next week.” Holding the door halfway open his back still to me he paused. “But whatever is going on between us can’t wait that long. We need to talk tonight, Lauren. I’ll call you around nine.”
Did he just call me ‘Lauren’? Oh, he must be really mad.
I wanted to say something, anything to relieve the tension between us, but I hesitated too long, and the door was closed behind him before I could find the words.
I shuffled to the bathroom of the little suite I called home since Evelyn came along. Thankful it was Sunday morning and most of the guests would be checking out by the time I was ready to go downstairs, I took my time knowing I could get to my office relatively unnoticed.
I was completely exhausted as I stepped into the shower and felt the tension instantly begin to melt. Some of my best thinking was done in the shower, and I needed a game plan now more than ever. I wasn’t about to let The Grand lose her newly found momentum, and as much as I wanted to avoid it, I needed to resolve things with Jake.
I lost my head this weekend. No, I completely lost my fucking mind. With The Grand hanging in the balance and my relationship with Jake already strained, seeing Parker again was enough to send me over the edge. But that was over now, and I had to leave it in the past with all the other memories of him. Whatever happened, whatever I felt, couldn’t be real. The chemistry was undeniable, explosive, but I didn’t know if I could ever fully trust Parker. Auras. Nina was right. Jake was my real, but I shut him out. I shut him out then betrayed him. Why? Because while I was trying to hold on to the only life I’d ever known, I neglected the only person I imagined sharing it with. My life was here at The Grandview, and living it without Jake was... my stomach clenched at the thought.
Jake was right, too. I had become distant, drinking more than usual, working late. The breakdown in our relationship was mo
stly on me. Why did I let it get this far? I had to make things right. Starting with the phone call tonight.
My head throbbed with dread, but I had to change things, and I would. Cutting down on the drinking would be easy, but using my time more productively so my nights could be free to spend with him might be a problem. I’d thought about hiring an assistant for some time, but with money so tight it wasn’t an option right now. Maybe I could check with the local college about the possibility of offering an unpaid internship.
As long as Jake never found out about this weekend we still had a chance. How could I be so stupid? I needed him. I needed him to love me, and to be invested in the future of The Grandview again. I desperately needed the loving compassionate man he used to be. The one who held me when I cried, picked me flowers on the side of the road and serenaded me with every song on the radio when we took our long Sunday drives up the coast. Did he still love me, or had things between us changed that much? An unnerving thought entered my mind. If I loved him then how could I have shared myself with Parker without a second thought?
I couldn’t let myself go down that road. Not now. I had to stay focused on the present and the things that were real. Parker was unfinished business until last night. Now it was time to move on. Besides, I was sure he’d have no trouble doing just that. He probably had a list of woman who’d be more than happy to keep his bed warm every night. A wave of nausea swept over me. I’m not jealous! I screamed at myself. Parker Blackwell could do whatever he damn well pleased. I was just thankful he’d be doing it far away in Las Vegas.
My throbbing head reminded me I needed coffee and a plan. I knew how I would deal with Jake, now I had to put some plans in motion for The Grand. I would ask Nina to call a staff meeting for tomorrow morning. We had to keep every penny from rolling out the door, and I would need help to determine where we could make some cuts.
Now where was my cell phone? Looking around I spotted it blinking on the nightstand. It was a missed call from Barry Stanton, dad’s attorney and old family friend. My knees felt weak as I sat on the bed to listen. Hearing from Barry on a Sunday couldn’t be good.
“Lauren, this is Barry. I know it’s Sunday, but could you come down to my office this afternoon to discuss the situation with The Grandview? Evelyn’s attorney called to give me a heads up...” he paused, “She wants to sell her shares, and you’ll have 90 days to come up with the money. The clock starts ticking tomorrow. I hope to see you around 2:00.”
I was reeling. I felt like I’d been punched in the gut, and everything inside me was being abruptly ejected. Dropping the phone on the bed I ran to the bathroom and barely made it in the door when the liquid contents of my stomach discharged, splattering explosively across the tile. Dropping to my knees, I braced myself against the toilet until the violent contractions stopped, and tears stung my eyes as I slumped there unable to move. One thought kept going through my mind. That greedy fucking bitch!
Things were never the same since the day she slithered into our lives. I hated her, and I never forgave my dad for marrying her. She closed in on him like a wounded animal, while half of him wanted to run away, the other half was in desperate need of care, and he fell prey to her devious tactics. Until then I had everything, an amazing family, The Grandview, Jake. Now my parents were gone, my relationship with Jake was rocky, and the family business that I loved my entire life could be ripped away. I didn’t have time to feel sorry for myself. I had to think fast. I had to see Nina right away.
Eleven
THE PIMP WORE PRADA
Ten minutes later I pulled myself together and was clicking down the hall in my black sling-back pumps. I did the best I could to thank a few departing guests as I made my way to the kitchen aware that my gurgling stomach could unleash again at any moment. Waves of nausea rippled through me as I followed the invisible trail of aromas through the swinging doors.
The smell, especially in the morning, was usually one of my favorite things about The Grand. Everything about her felt like home. Everything. Morning sunlight filled her to the brim bouncing across the maple floors. On summer nights flames from the bonfire danced and reflected across tinkling glasses filled with summer’s most intoxicating concoctions. There was live music and laughter, and smiling guests danced, sang and enjoyed to excess. In these walls lived an unmistakable feeling that everything was right in the world. Until now.
In the kitchen the full force of sausage, eggs and bacon filled the air and I fought to keep my composure as I scanned the room for Nina, but even in this state of despair I felt lucky. I had lived my whole life on vacation. People who came to The Grandview were only visiting for a short time. I got to see them at their happiest, full of kindness, enjoying the finest food, wine, the white sandy beaches and the most luxurious cotton sheets. All the while cameras were clicking capturing each joyous scene. Until now it never occurred to me that there was anything other than life at The Grandview. Being on vacation every day was the only life I’d ever known, and I wasn’t about to let anyone change that. Not Evelyn. Not anyone.
Things were bustling in the kitchen. Nina walked in just as I was about to give up, and she noticed immediately that something was desperately wrong.
She smiled thinly. “Hey, you okay?”
“No. I need to talk to you in my office,” I whispered. “I’ll grab you a coffee.”
As Nina filled a plate I grabbed a mug and stirred in two creams and two sugars, exactly how she liked it.
Moments later, I sat behind my desk with my head in my hands waiting for her. “Shut the door,” I told her as she walked in already enjoying her breakfast. “Barry called this morning, and I have good news and bad news.”
“Bad news first,” she mumbled, covering her stuffed mouth as she spoke.
“Nina, this can’t leave my office. You have to pinky swear.”
“Are you fucking serious, Lo? Just tell me the bad news already.”
“Not until you pinky swear.” I understood why she was annoyed with my antics. So much was hanging in the balance, and here I was asking her to do something we did when we were about to confess which boy we were in love with each summer, but it didn’t matter. Something about the gesture made me feel reassured, like when Parker forced me to do it. I stuck out my pinky to show her I meant business.
Relenting, she rolled her eyes and wrapped her pinky finger around mine. “There. Now please this is obviously serious. You look like hell.”
I scowled at her sarcastically. “Yes, it’s very serious. That’s why you had to pinky swear. What I’m about to tell you is crazy serious. It’s so serious that I’m at a loss for what to do, and you know that doesn’t happen to me very often.”
“Fuck! Just say it already!”
“The Grandview is in trouble, Nina. Profits are down, and I found out this morning that my lovely business partner wants to sell her share. I have 90 days to come up with the money or it will go on the market.”
Nina dropped her fork to her plate. She was silent, but the look on her face said it all. That’s right, Nina. Connect the dots. The huge mansion on the lake, the new forty foot boat docked at the marina, the Cadillac parked in the driveway. Evelyn had burned through all of dad’s money, and now she wanted to cash in on the one thing she had left.
I waited for the enormity of my news to sink in. The color drained from her face. She cleared her throat and finally replied, “And there’s good news?”
“Yes, the good news is that I only need to come up with twenty-five percent to pay her off, and with tourism and property values down I’m hoping it’ll be a number I can manage.”
“What the fuck was your dad thinking leaving her ownership in The Grandview? What are you going to do Lo? That fucking bitch! I knew she was evil from the get go!”
Ah, organic girl at her best. Funny how such foul language could spew from my petite little peace-loving, save-the-world best friend. God I loved her!
Her anger told me she was ready to go to battle, bu
t what she did next confirmed it. Some people roll up their sleeves when they’re ready to take care of business. Not Nina. The moment she set her glasses on my desk and gathered her hair in a bun at the back of her neck, I knew she was totally onboard.
“Yes, she’s evil. This feels like the final blow, Nina. It will be final, too if I don’t figure out a way to come up with the money.”
“What do you mean come up with the money, Lo? Even at 25%, how could you possibly come up with that much in three months? Do you have some secret life I don’t know about? Don’t tell me you’re auditioning for the next episode of Locked up Abroad or something?”
“This is clearly why we’ve been best friends for so long, Nina. Even when the chips are down your sense of humor doesn’t miss a beat.”
“Seriously, Lo. We need to do something about your chakras!” Her eyes narrowed as she waited for my response.
“I don’t know yet, but I’m working on it. The chakras will have to wait for now. In the meantime I need you to call a staff meeting for tomorrow morning. All the department heads should be there, kitchen manager, entertainment manager, housekeeping manager, everyone. I need to tell them myself and let them know that I will find the money no matter what it takes. I’m going to see Barry right now.”
We were both thinking the same thing, but it was Nina who said it out loud. “Lo, I hate to say this but three months may not be long enough. There’s a chance you…”
“I know what you’re thinking, Nina, but losing this place isn’t an option. I’ll sell my fucking soul to the devil before I’ll see my parents dream sold to the highest bidder.”
Just Fall (The Fall Series) Page 8
