My head starts to ache again, and I lean forward, planting my elbows on my knees. I feel dizzy. When Leafy comes back inside with a box in her hands, my nose starts bleeding again, too.
“Fuck,” I say.
“I’ve got this,” she says. She throws everything into the sink and rummages through whatever it is. In her hand she holds a bottle filled with liquid and for a second I cringe, thinking she’s gonna sedate me with a syringe or something. I hate those things. Fortunately, she just dabs a wad of cotton on the bottle until it’s soaked.
“This’ll hurt. A lot.” The words aren’t even out yet before the cotton has already been shoved against the lacerations on my face. It’s burning into my skin.
“Fuck! Jesus Christ!” I hiss. “What are you doing?”
It hurts so goddamn much I slam my fist into the wall to relieve myself from the pain.
She jolts up, startled. “Cleaning your wounds with alcohol.”
Take it off, take it off, take it off. TAKE IT FUCKING OFF ME!
I want to scream in her face, but I don’t, because I don’t want to scare her any more than I already have. She’s the only one who can fix me up right now. So I shut my mouth and bite down hard.
When she finally stops prodding at me I breathe out. I frown when she starts wrapping a bandage around my head.
“Do I have to wear this?” I say after a while. She’s spinning it around my head, covering up my wound. I’m staring straight at her tits, which are swaying from side to side as she works. Hot damn. I could just reach up and squeeze them, but that would be fucking rude. I’d like to, though. It’d be a nice way to lessen the pain.
“Yes. You’ve got a big gash on your forehead. Doesn’t look pretty. It needs to heal.”
Seriously? I’m gonna have to walk around with this around my head all day? I groan in frustration. Wearing bandages isn’t something the gang would likely approve of.
“How are your knuckles?” she asks.
I glance briefly at them. Stretching my fingers already hurts too much, so I refrain from using them. She doesn’t need to know. I don’t want to make her worry. “Fine.”
I let my head rest against the wall, feeling tired. All I want is to find the nearest bed and sleep for two or three days. She fiddles with my fingers, coaxing me to open them, so I do. Her touch is gentle, soft, and hesitant, as if she’s still afraid I might lash out at her. I hate knowing she feels this way about me. I did this on purpose to make sure she didn’t get hurt, and it was all for nothing. She still got hurt in the end.
She lets go of my hands after doing a thorough inspection and cleaning. “Thanks,” I say. I appreciate what she’s doing for me. She stuck with me, and now she’s even mending my wounds. I’m not sure I deserve all her help. I look her in the eye, feeling grateful and guilty at the same time. It’s only then that I realize she’s still missing her glasses. I picked them up from the pavement right after the fight.
“Where are your glasses?” I ask, teasing her. She doesn’t know I have them. It’s a stupid way to repay her kindness, but I’m trying to lighten the mood here.
Her eyes drift off to the floor. “I lost them during the fight …”
I can’t stop the laughter from spilling out. I’m awful at keeping secrets. Damn, laughing is hard when your ribs are bruised, though. “Too bad. You looked cuter with them.”
Her jaw drops, and she seems taken aback by my comment. Judging from her flushing cheeks she probably doesn’t hear that a lot. When she giggles, it sounds so cute I just want to smother her with kisses. I wonder what’s so funny.
“What?” I say, leaning forward. She stops immediately, gazing back at me, tensing up. I’m getting closer and closer, taunting her, pushing her to her limit. I like seeing her uncomfortable. It makes me want to do things to her she can’t even imagine.
“What’s so funny?” I say, because I still don’t get why she was giggling a second ago. “You think I’m making a joke?” I’m not. She’s hot; so fucking hot I want to slide my tongue all over her.
Her cheeks turn an ever brighter shade of red, and I’m so fucking turned on by it I just want to grab her, pin her to the wall and take her right here, right now to show her I’m not playing around.
She clears her throat. “No. You’re just the first to say that.”
Is that it, huh? She can’t believe I’m really into her? Figures.
I lean back again. “Well it’s the truth.”
She sighs, her eyes drifting off to the door. She looks embarrassed. “Others don’t seem to think so.”
Why does she let herself feel down about what other people think? Like it matters.
“You shouldn’t care so much about what others think,” I say. “What you think is what matters.”
I don’t want her to feel bad anymore, so I decide to cheer her up by giving her back her glasses.
As I take them out, she says, “Oh my God, you found them! Thank you so much.”
There’s a huge smile on her face, and it’s making me smile too. She always has that effect on me. “Don’t mention it. Least I could do for you now that you’ve nursed me back to health.”
Moving to give her the glasses back makes me groan from the pain in my chest. “Damn … I feel like shit,” I say, chuckling. It’s true, although I hate to admit it. I’m hoping a good night’s sleep will fix me up in no time.
“You look the part,” she says.
How nice, a compliment. Well, I’m too tired to care. “I just want to crash on my bed and sleep through the day tomorrow.”
I stand up, but can’t even walk normally. I’m holding onto the wall, while she puts her arm around me and helps me walk out. Makes me feel like a helpless old sucker. Damn, since when did I get old?
The moment I see my bed it’s like it’s luring me in, whispering my name. I just let myself fall down and sink into the pillow. I don’t even mind Leafy still being here, watching me. I’m already drifting off into a deep sleep when she suddenly speaks up again.
“Thanks. For coming to my rescue.”
“I would do it again,” I mutter. I’m only partially awake, but I manage to smile lazily.
“Well … goodnight,” she says, and I think she leaves.
I don’t remember anything after that.
All I remember is her gentle voice lulling me into a deep sleep.
Chapter 14
Letting It all Out
The next day…
“You look like shit, dude,” Jaret says, handing me some coffee.
“Thanks. For the coffee, I mean.”
“What happened? I thought you had a trade, not a beating?”
I snort. “They deserved the beating, not me.”
“Well, then why did you get your ass whooped?” He laughs, but it’s not funny. Not even a little.
“I didn’t get my ass whooped!” I frown. “I fucking kicked those shits in the nuts! Fucking asswipes.”
“Okay … Sounds like the trade didn’t go well, then.”
“Fuck the trade! Fuck them all.”
“You know the gang’s not gonna take disobedience, right?”
I scowl at him, and he raises an eyebrow. “Whatever, dude,” he says. “I’m just trying to help.”
He gets up and puts his cup of coffee on a table. “You can’t beat up clients, Hunter. It’s not good for the business.”
“They were going to fucking rape her! Of course I stepped in.”
“Who?”
I swallow. Of course, Jaret doesn’t know about her. I hadn’t thought about that yet. I’d wanted to keep her for my own. Sort of as a little secret I could cherish. But I guess the cat’s out of the bag now.
“This girl …” I say, sighing.
He chuckles. “You’re letting yourself get beaten over a girl?”
I get up and start pacing around. “They were asking for it. Those guys were no good anyway. I’ll make it up to the gang. Don’t worry about it.”
“Right …”
he says, grabbing his books. “Well … I just wanna say, be careful. I told your brother I’d look out for you.”
“I know,” I say. “I just want to reach the top as fast as possible without breaking so many goddamn laws.”
Jaret chuckles, taking a last sip from his coffee. “That ain’t gonna happen, kid. You knew the deal when you joined.”
“Yes, I know,” I grumble. I mull it over a bit, biting my lip. If I want to get closer to the leader, I need someone to take me there, someone who’s already been in the gang for a long time. Someone they trust. Someone like Jaret.
“Jaret?”
“Hmm?”
“Can I trust you?”
His brows furrow. “Yeah, but that depends on what you’re asking.”
“Will you help me get my brother out of jail?”
He takes in a sharp breath, holding it. “I’m not sure I should say yes, considering the things you’re willing to put yourself through. I don’t want to risk my position in Alpha Psi.”
“I know. Your loyalty lies with them too. But doesn’t it also lie with my brother?” I say, raising an eyebrow.
He looks down at the ground, fiddling with a pen he was supposed to put in his bag. “I guess …”
“I mean, you do owe him your life, if you remember.”
“Oh, I remember all right,” he says, scratching his head. I know this isn’t a conversation he wants to have right now, and I feel bad for bringing it up, but it’s the only way to get him to help me.
“I can’t do this without you,” I say.
Jaret lets out a huge sigh. “All right. I’ll help you.”
I get up, smile, and walk over to him to give him a bro-shake, “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”
“But I won’t betray the gang,” he says, lowering his head. “I don’t want to get in trouble, so I want this to stay under the radar, got that? I’m not letting you pull me down with you.”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it.”
“Good.” He slaps me on the shoulder. “I have to get to class. See ya later.”
Jaret leaves me to myself, and I stare at the cup of coffee in my hand, turning colder with every passing second. Being alone isn’t one of the things I enjoy. It scares me, the silence around me, because it makes room for bad thoughts. Memories of yesterday swirl through my mind, and I get sick just thinking about what those guys were trying to do to Leafy. I haven’t seen her since last night, and I wonder if she’s okay. I want to check up on her, I just don’t know if she wants me to.
Part of me wants to be a better person, to be what people expect me to be. Go to classes, study hard, walk down the right path. It’s just so hard to do that and get my brother out. I need him.
But I want to stay in college too, and the way it’s going now will get me kicked off campus in no time. I really have to learn to do both. Learn to study harder, read faster. Make myself remember things.
I can’t do it alone, though. And I think Leafy might be the perfect teacher. She could help me learn to remember. If she’s not too scared to be around me, that is. She’s so insecure sometimes. I wonder if I can do something about that.
Maybe I can train her, help her fight, so she can defend herself. That would work. It’s just like a trade, only this time it’s on the good side of the law.
I decide to take a chance and just go for it. I want to help her get over her fear, and for her to feel safe, and she can help me succeed. It’s the perfect match.
I get up and walk to her room. She’s just about to close her door, so I jam my foot in the gap. “Got a minute?”
Her head lifts and when her endless blue eyes meet mine I’m at a loss for words. A cute, shy smile is plastered to her face, and it makes me want to lean in and kiss her. Her beauty amazes me every fucking time.
She opens the door quickly, and it slams into the wall. Is she that excited to see me? I laugh.
“Hey,” she says with a soft, sweet voice that sends shivers down my spine and makes my cock throb.
“Hey yourself.” I’m trying to look tough by grabbing the door, casually leaning backwards, but I know I still look like a mess. I’m hoping my ego can hide the cuts on my lips and maybe my smile will make her forget that awful-looking bandage wrapped around my head. Although, she did put it on me. Hmm … I wouldn’t say no to that. Oh, damn, here I go again with my sexual innuendos.
She clears her throat. “What’s up?”
I can’t just barge in here and tell her what’s up. Cutting straight to the point might be a little insensitive, but I don’t know how else to say it either.
“Hmmm, nothing. Just thought I’d come visit,” I say. Oh, fuck me, did I really have to say it like that?
She laughs, and that makes me feel even worse. “For no reason?”
No, it’s not, but I don’t know what to tell her either. I don’t want her to think I’m using her, because that’s not my intention.
“Yeah?” I say. “Why? Can’t I come visit the girl who patched me up?” There, now I don’t look like a blabbering lunatic.
“That’s not it, I just …” she stammers. Her eyebrows draw together in confusion as she looks away. It looks like something is bothering her, a lot. I wonder what’s wrong. Maybe it’s me that’s bothering her.
I step forward, and she inches back. I knew it. Still afraid of me. Damn it. It’s all my doing, and I know exactly why. I just can’t deal with it. Not anymore. I’ve gotten too close to her. “You want me to leave?”
I’m asking, but I’ll only accept a ‘no.’ In her eyes I see anguish, trouble, and something tells me that it wasn’t caused by me. She’s in need of help.
“No, no, no,” she stammers, raising her hands like she wants to make peace with me. I’m not here for that. She doesn’t even realize how conflicted and despaired she looks. How much her feelings flow out of her like a leaking faucet. I don’t have to ask to know there’s something wrong.
She keeps walking backwards, and I keep prowling forward, intent on making her spill what’s on her mind. I’m dying to know what she’s thinking right now. Probably that she’s afraid of me. The left corner of my lip lifts up into a lazy smile. “I think you do. You just don’t want to say it. You’re scared of me.”
She sucks in her lip, her breath catching in her throat when I place my hand on the wall beside her. I’ve got her trapped underneath me, and it’s making my cock twitch in excitement. I’m fiercely protective of her, although I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I see my own future in her eyes. As if she can save me from my own life.
But she’s shivering, her eyes begging me not to hurt her. It’s painful to see her look at me like that. Like I’d ever hurt her. She’s scared of something that’s not even real.
“That’s it, right?” I say, my voice deepening as lust builds inside me. My horny mind is lost in a fantasy. I want to lock my mouth on hers, grind my cock against her hips, make her feel how much I want her.
I laugh because of the stupidity of it all. We’re both fighting our attraction to each other, neither of us willing to admit there’s something special going on between us. I know exactly what she’s afraid of. She’s afraid to give in to temptation, and it’s so fucking hot, I can’t stand it.
“Even if you told me, I still wouldn’t leave. I always go against the rules.” I close my eyes, my lashes brushing her cheeks as I whisper her ultimate desire. “That’s why you want me.”
I step back, giving her the air she so desperately seems to need. She’s gasping, her breath ragged and uncontrolled, like she just ran a marathon. As she catches her breath, I watch her face, her emotions clearly readable. Her mood shifts from shock, to annoyance, to anger. It’s funny to watch the confusing mess that is inside her. I could unravel all the feelings she’s tucked deep inside her. If only she’d ask.
Her eyebrows draw together and she scowls. “Stop being such a jerk!”
The look on her face makes me laugh. “Me? A jerk? Never.” She’s right, but why wo
uld I admit that? But I like teasing her, and I’m not sorry for it. It’s what makes her so fun to be around.
She groans, but it sounds more like half a scream, and then she picks up a pillow from her bed and throws it at me. I laugh. It’s such a soft throw, I can catch it easily, and it only seems to infuriate her more. Her face is glowing red hot from rage, and I kind of like the sight of it. I’m disturbed, I know. I just like my girls feisty.
“Stop laughing!”
“I can’t. You’re too funny when you’re mad at me.”
“Goddammit, I hate that.”
No, she doesn’t. She’s just telling herself that. It’s not all that’s on her mind.
“Hate what? That I show you the truth about yourself? That you secretly enjoy breaking the rules and don’t want to admit it?”
She closes her mouth, her nostrils flaring. I throw the pillow aside.
I’m trying to see if she’ll finally break out of her shell. I know something’s bothering her and she keeps it buried so deep inside it’s eating her up. I don’t like seeing it, and I want to find out the truth.
So I taunt her some more.
“Stop being such a snoot and open your eyes. You saw what happened yesterday. That’s the real world. You can’t hide behind your innocence forever.”
For a second she winces, and in that moment of disgust I know I’ve hit the spot. It’s yesterday that’s bothering her. The guys tried to rape her, and she never got a chance to let it out. I feel sorry for her, and it pains me to draw her out even further, but I have to. She needs to let it all out.
“You can’t shut it out. You have to deal with what happened. Face it head on. It’s the only way to stop it from happening again,” I say, this time a little less crudely.
“And you think I can face it head on?” she yells, folding her arms, her breath sounding like that of a dragon breathing fire. “How can you say that? You make it sound so easy. Like I should just get over it. I was almost raped last night!”
Hearing those words is so painful, I can barely keep my mouth shut. I want to scream with her. And then I want to find those guys and tear off their limbs one by one.
Fury (New Adult Romance) - #1.5 Fierce Series Page 11
