“I’m leaving,” I told them, opening the back door.
“Don’t be late,” Mom called after me. “You still need to pack.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I muttered to myself as I slammed the door and practically sprinted to my car.
The sun was going down as I drove through town and parked at the library. It was in the middle of town, and anyone coming from the police station would have to drive by it. I parked right on the street out front and walked in, waving at the librarian as I went straight to the back where I’d always studied in high school.
It was quiet back there, away from everything and everyone. Other than the librarian and a few people using the computers up front, there wasn’t anyone else in the building, though. School was out as of that afternoon, and I was the only person in the county trying to read my course work for the next semester. Not that I needed to, now that I’d applied to Trinity. I would have to buy all new books for my scheduled classes come fall.
But my parents didn’t know that yet. No one did, and I wasn’t going to say anything about it until I had everything sorted and settled. Once I had my admittance confirmed, my courses scheduled, and my books bought, no one could argue with me if they didn’t like it.
Like Dad.
He couldn’t wait for the fall so I would be back in Oregon, he’d said that morning after Ben left the shop. My father wanted me as far away from the sheriff as possible.
And yet there I was, waiting for the man to see my car out front and come find me.
I had no damn willpower where Ben was concerned, apparently. I knew if Dad found out about this, he would do something reckless, and I was aware I was putting Ben’s life in jeopardy after the not-so-veiled threat Dad had made the night before.
Yet I couldn’t stay away when Ben had asked me to meet him tonight.
Fuck.
I’d only know the guy a few days, and I was already in so far over my head, I didn’t know which way was up. I was becoming a traitor to my family.
To my mom.
Maybe I needed to stay in New York a few extra days after all. Just until I was over whatever spell I’d allowed myself to fall under where Ben was concerned. It would be better for both of us, but especially for him.
Definitely safer.
“When I said meet me later, this was not what I had in mind,” Ben’s deep voice murmured from right behind me.
I jumped with surprise. I’d been so lost in my head, thinking about keeping him safe, I hadn’t heard or even sensed him.
“Easy,” he breathed at my ear, his mouth touching my neck, making me gasp and arch into the graze of his lips against my flesh. His stubble felt so damn good against my skin. Goose bumps popped up where he caressed, making me shiver deliciously, and I was grateful there were no cameras in this part of the library. “God, you taste so good, beautiful.”
I lowered my lashes, savoring this stolen moment, and tears burned my eyes because I knew it was the last time I could allow this to happen. This meetup was to tell him I couldn’t see him anymore—and really mean it this time.
I couldn’t—wouldn’t—let anything happen to Mom. And this relationship, or whatever the hell it was, would put her freedom in jeopardy. Maybe he wouldn’t betray me. But Royce Campbell would be itching to get whatever dirt he could on any member of my family, and I had plenty on my mom. The thought of betraying her, even by accident, made me feel physically ill.
“B-Ben,” I started, but he traced a line with his lips to my jaw, and I couldn’t stop myself from turning my head and meeting his kiss.
The Earth’s rotation seemed to slow down, and I kissed him back hungrily, my hands thrusting into his hair to hold on as we devoured each other with our mouths. I was stupid—this was stupid—but I just needed one more taste.
“Let’s get out of here,” Ben rasped when he lifted his head sometime later. “We’ll go to my place.”
I was on my feet before reality hit, and I stopped cold. If my dad found out about any of this, it really was going to be all over. If Mom found out, she would be so disappointed in me. And if I was honest, that bothered me more than what Dad would possibly do. Squaring my shoulders, I locked my knees and refused to give in, no matter how good his kisses were.
“I’m leaving in the morning,” I told him in a voice that wasn’t nearly as strong as I needed it to be, but the words alone were enough to have him jerking around to face me.
“Leaving for where?” he demanded, his jaw tense. “When will you be back?”
“I’m going to New York first thing in the morning. I…don’t know when I’ll be back.” The longer I stayed, the better at this point, I figured. As long as I was home by the time Mom started whatever treatment her doctor wanted her to have.
“What’s in New York?” he growled, jealousy coming off him in waves just as it had earlier that day when Higgins had been screwing around at the shop. The look in his eyes alone had made me worried for Higgins’s life at the time, and I’d pushed him out the door to avoid bloodshed.
“I’m accompanying two of my cousins. They spend every summer with their mom’s family. She can’t go and asked me.” Relief relaxed his face, and he reached for me again. “But I’m going to stay for a while to clear my head.” He opened his mouth, probably to argue with me, but I covered it with my hand. “You haven’t been listening to me, Ben. Not once. We. Can. Not. Be. Together.”
Covering my hand, he pressed my palm closer to his lips, kissing it tenderly before pulling it away. “Give me one good reason why we can’t, Lexa.”
“Because you’re the sheriff, and my family are not exactly law-abiding citizens. The DA is out for blood where they are concerned, and you work directly with him.” I closed my eyes, remembering all the hurtful things Dad had said about Ben using me.
At the time, I’d started to believe it, but I just couldn’t completely convince myself. Ben had no clue who I was that first night. We had too strong of a connection for whatever was going on with us to be about him using me.
But I couldn’t be selfish any longer.
Mom had my complete loyalty, and Dad wasn’t kidding about taking care of Ben himself. He would, and it would break what was left of my soul.
“Don’t worry about Royce Campbell,” Ben grumbled now. “I’m going to take care of him and prove to your father I care about you.”
“Ben.” I blew out a frustrated sigh. “Don’t go stirring up more trouble for yourself. Campbell is a slimy bastard. Whatever you have planned is going to blow up in your face. Please,” I begged, not so proud that I couldn’t plead for his safety. “I’m not worth any of this. Just forget about me. I don’t want to see you lose your job or something worse.”
He wrapped his arms around my waist, locking me against him as his intense gaze met mine. “You are worth more than anything. Don’t you ever say that to me again. You know what? Don’t ever say that again, period. I’m a grown man, baby. I can take care of myself, so stop worrying about me with Campbell and your dad. I’ll take them all on if that means I can be with you.”
I really liked the sound of that, but even if he could deal with Campbell, he couldn’t deal with Bash Reid. No one but my mom could, and I wasn’t going to drag her into the middle of this shit when she was sick.
Pushing back against his hold, I stepped away from him. Already, I felt the loss of his warmth, the scent of his cologne filling my nose, the spark that zinged through my skin and blood just from being close to him. My choice was made.
Family would always come first for me.
“Bye, Ben,” I whispered, fighting the burn of tears all over again.
Chapter 7
Lexa
Sleep was elusive all night, and trying to get any type of rest on the plane just wasn’t possible with the way Garret was constantly causing some kind of trouble.
Somehow, he stole a knife from one of the guard’s leg holsters and tried to carve his name into the t
able at the back of the jet before any of us realized. After that, we were all wide awake, and I was ready to toss my cousin out the door without a parachute. Now I understood why Aunt Flick looked a little haggard throughout the school year, but during the summer, she was more well rested and had a little pep to her step. She needed weeks away from her son just as much as Nova needed her time in New York with her favorite person.
We were met right on the tarmac of the airport by a limo and six huge black SUVs, all of them loaded with bodyguards. I gripped Garret’s wrist in my hand as we walked down the stairs, while Nova bounced down and straight into the handsome boy’s arms at the bottom.
“Ryan!” she screamed as he twirled her around and around, making her giggle happily.
Standing by the car, Anya Vitucci smiled lovingly at her son and his best friend, a toddler at her feet holding her hand. The little girl was jumping up and down, talking a mile a minute, while her mother only nodded in response to whatever her daughter was chattering on about.
“You can let me go now, Lexa,” Garret grumbled, but I only tightened my hold on him.
“Yeah, that’s not going to happen. Your dad said if I let you out of my sight before Ciro Donati took over your care, you were likely to run off and hide in the city.” Which I didn’t doubt for a single second. If I had handcuffs, I would have already slapped one on his wrist and attached the other to my own for a little extra security.
Anya laughed when I got to the bottom of the stairs and Garret struggled against my hold once again. “Well, I see trouble has arrived.”
He turned beet red, but shrugged. “I just wanna have fun,” he complained. “Nothing wrong with that.”
“No,” she agreed with a smirk that made her blue eyes sparkle. “Not a single thing wrong with that, kiddo. Unless you start endangering your life or others. Now, get your smart ass in the limo before I show you what they would do to kids in Russia who ‘just wanna have fun.’”
I could have fallen on my knees in gratitude for the woman with how fast Garret straightened up and did exactly as he was told with just one dark look from her. She gave me a quick, one-armed hug while her daughter danced around our feet. “Good to see you, myshka,” she murmured before stepping back. She was so small, I felt more like a giant than normal as I stood over her. Yet at the same time, something about her made me feel tiny.
“Myshka,” the toddler echoed, holding up her arms and grunting, wanting to be held. “Myshka!”
Bending, I lifted Samara into my arms. Her eyes, so like her mother’s, were filled with a happiness only the purely innocent held as she hugged me trustingly. “Pweety,” she said with a sigh as she snuggled into my arms and promptly fell asleep.
I was so surprised she’d fallen asleep that fast, it scared me, and I looked at Anya for guidance.
Grinning, she shook her dark head. “Don’t worry. The little devil can fall asleep in the blink of an eye. First time it happened, her father thought he’d broken her and freaked out.”
Having met Cristiano Vitucci on a few occasions, I found the idea of him freaking out over anything kind of ludicrous. Yet I’d seen how much he loved his wife and son; I could only imagine his precious baby daughter had him tied in knots.
Still grinning, Anya turned to her son. “Ryan, time to go. Nova is probably tired after that long flight.”
“I’m not,” Nova assured her as she skipped over to the older woman and embraced her. “I missed you too, Anya. Did you miss me?”
“So much. But not nearly as much as Ryan, I’m sure.”
“No one misses me as much as Ryan,” Nova assured her with so much confidence in her voice, I couldn’t help but smile.
But the truth was, I doubted even her parents would miss her during the time she was away as much as Ryan missed her throughout the rest of the year. Whatever bond those two had, it was a strong one. Yet I worried about how painful it would be for the little cousin I’d always considered a baby sister if that bond were ever broken.
--
Even though it was my first trip to New York, everyone treated me like I was just as much a part of their family as Garret and Nova were. From Aunt Flick’s cousin, Ciro, all the way to Adrian Volkov, Anya’s older brother.
“You’ve been the talk of the morning,” Theo, Adrian’s son and perhaps my closest friend, confessed as we sat in some posh restaurant his family owned in the middle of the city.
I toyed with my water glass, avoiding his direct gaze. “I can only imagine.”
He laughed heartily, his slightly shaggy hair falling across his forehead, his dark eyes alight with mirth. Theo was a seriously good-looking guy, but he still had a boyishness about him that reminded me of my brother, officially making it impossible for me to feel anything even remotely approaching attraction. That didn’t mean the female population didn’t chase after him like they were all in heat, though. Even right then, he was getting looks from the women at other tables near our own. “So, it’s true, then. You’re fucking around with the sheriff back in Cali.”
“I’m not fucking him,” I snapped. “I didn’t let it get that far, and I won’t. Family means everything to me… Scratch that. Fuck the rest of my family. My mom means everything to me. I would sell my soul to make sure that she’s safe, that nothing touches her.”
He gave me a look that had the anger in me drying up. Damn it, he knew me so well; I couldn’t hide anything from him. Theo and I had bonded from the first time we met. We were both adopted by the women we loved more than life. Our moms meant everything to us, and we would do anything for them.
“Okay, okay. Take it easy. I know you don’t mean that. You don’t have to prove your family loyalty to me, sweetheart. You’re just pissed at your dad for taking all his frustration out on you. He loves you, Lexa. You two have never been at odds before, and the only reason he’s so off the walls right now is because your mom is sick. Once things have calmed down, he’ll lighten up.”
Guilt hit me, but I pushed it down. I’d told Theo all about Mom’s cancer, knowing he would never tell a soul. When his own mom needed a kidney transplant years ago, he’d confided in me, and that was when our bond was really solidified. I’d never told anyone anything he’d confessed to me back then, and I never would. Just as I knew anything I told him, he would take to the grave.
That wasn’t why I felt guilty, though. I’d told him, but I hadn’t mentioned a word of Mom’s illness to Ben, when I’d ached to unload it all on his shoulders. I felt like I was betraying him in some way, telling all my worries to anyone but him, which was beyond crazy.
“I’m pissed, but not so much at him as I am at myself,” I admitted. “I knew I was being reckless when this whole thing started with Ben. People from my world don’t date people from his.”
“You make it sound like you are some poor white trash from the wrong side of the tracks. Your parents are loaded, girl.”
That had me rolling my eyes. “No, they’re comfortable, but they aren’t millionaires or anything. Not like your family, Theo. We all still have to work for our paychecks.”
“As does the sheriff, I’m assuming,” Theo pointed out. “Stop putting yourself down.”
“I wasn’t,” I lied.
“Bullshit.”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying. Why are we friends again?” But a ghost of a smile teased at my lips, and he winked at me as he picked up a fork and knife, cutting into the steak the waiter had just placed in front of him.
Once the waiter was gone and I sat there glaring at the salmon on my own plate, Theo cleared his throat. “I should warn you. Everyone is determined to set the two of us up.”
“I figured as much. Aunt Flick and Mom were both hinting at it last night, encouraging me to stay a few extra days.” I’d packed enough clothes to stay for at least a week, hoping that was enough time to clear my head before I went home to help Mom once she started her cancer treatments.
“And you’re okay with th
at?” He sounded skeptical enough for me to lift my gaze from my food to find him frowning.
“You and I both know we are only ever going to be friends. Let them have their fantasies about us becoming a couple and then getting married and having all those grandbabies my dad says he never wants but secretly craves.”
His lips twitched with humor once again. “I’d marry you in a heartbeat if my emotions weren’t already involved elsewhere.”
I snorted out a laugh. “I don’t think it would work out, Theo. I’m just not your type. This friendship would go down the drain if we had to spend more than a few days together every few years. We’re better as long-distance besties who text so we can bitch about our lives to each other.”
“I agree.” Leaning forward, he got a sly look in his dark eyes that had my own narrowing on him. “But the parents don’t need to know that, do they?”
Picking up my knife, I pointed it at him. “Stop it right there, Volkov. Don’t think one more thing, or you’ll find yourself without a tongue. I won’t play those kinds of mind games with my mom.”
Roaring with laughter, he grabbed the knife from my hand before I could even blink and turned it so it was now pointing in my direction. “Okay, okay. We won’t pretend to date to appease my own mother. I just thought maybe if your sheriff thought you were otherwise engaged, he would back off.”
I opened my mouth to tell him no again, but I quickly closed it. I didn’t like lying to anyone, especially my mom, but it wasn’t the worst idea to have as a backup plan if I got home and Ben didn’t keep his distance.
“I’ll think about it,” I told him after a moment.
“It’s an open invitation,” he vowed. “Anytime you need me to step in and help out, I’ll be the dashing fiancé who rides to the rescue.”
“Noted,” I muttered and finally took a bite of my dinner. As I chewed, I stewed it over before releasing a heavy sigh. “Theo?”
“Yeah, sweets?”
“Thanks.”
Salvation Page 5
