“That sounds impossible. I didn’t even know about this world until a couple of months ago.”
“You’re strong, Mara. And smart. You’ll figure it out.”
My brows knitted together. “Why are you talking like you won’t be with me?”
“I can’t predict the future, but I want you to be prepared to run on your own if it comes to it.”
My stomach knotted with queasiness at the idea, but I didn’t voice my concerns because I knew Theo would shut them down.
“Okay, then. What should we cover first?”
He stood. “I had you try the candle thing for something bigger so let’s work on that.”
I stood too and he moved so a good ten feet separated us.
“I want you to think about the fire again, but instead of lighting the candle I want you to think about it in your hand.”
“Um …” I hesitated. “Won’t that burn my hand?”
He chuckled. “Not yours since you conjured it, but when you throw it at me it will burn me if I don’t block it quick enough.”
“Oh, great.”
I took a breath and closed my eyes, holding my hands up in front of me.
I envisioned a bright burning orange flame licking my hands. The fire caressed them and flickered in the light.
When I opened my eyes, I gasped and my eyes shot across to Theo who smiled widely with pride.
“Now throw it at me.”
I took a throwing stance and launched it at him.
He brought his hands up and blocked it with a gust of air. My flames vanished in a puff of smoke.
“Again.”
He made me practice until I was drenched in sweat and then had me move on to conjuring water in a cup before again having it appear in my hands to use as a weapon.
“I once heard of an enchanter who was drowned by an Iniquitous,” he explained as I closed my eyes to concentrate.
“That sounds … pleasant.”
I opened my eyes and found the water swirling around my hands like many orbs of waves.
Theo was distracted at the moment so I threw one at him and it pushed him back about three feet with the force and drenched him from head to toe.
I fell over, clutching my stomach as laughter choked me.
“You look like a drowned rat,” I chortled.
“You’re going to pay for that,” he growled.
A second later, I yelped when fire stung my ass.
“That was not nice,” I scolded, gathering myself.
“Well, neither were you.” He peeled his wet shirt off and rung it out. “We’re done for the day.”
“Maybe I don’t want to be done,” I challenged.
He stalked toward me and I had to keep backing up until one of the bookcases bumped into me. He towered above me, his hair dripping with water.
He skimmed a finger down my cheek. “Why do you defy me?”
I swallowed thickly. “B-Because it’s fun.”
“I can think of many, many other things that would be more fun.”
My heart stuttered.
His eyes flicked down to my lips and he groaned. “You are my greatest fight and my longest battle.”
Before I could process what his words meant, his lips stole my breath.
He cupped my cheek in one hand and angled my head back. His lips devoured mine, that was the only way to describe it. He nibbled at my bottom lip and then his tongue gently nudged mine.
I felt like I was burning up from the inside out. He was going to kill me, I was sure of it.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, pushing my body into his. He was hard where I was soft, but somehow, we still fit together.
My heart ached, though, knowing this wasn’t real.
All we were, all we could be, were stolen kisses, glances, and wishes for something more. But I was selfish enough to take all he’d give me while he was giving it. This feeling, this thing between us, was worth the pain.
My hands moved down his smooth chest, tracing the contours of his muscles.
He bit my bottom lip and I gasped. He sucked at it and then kissed me with more force, completely dominating, and I let him. He grabbed my legs and picked me up, pushing into my hips with his. My back pressed painfully into the bookcase behind me but I couldn’t bring myself to care.
My hands moved to his cheeks, the scruff there harsh beneath my palms.
I didn’t know how long we kissed for, but when we broke apart we were both out of breath and our eyes were glazed over.
“I hate wanting what I can’t have,” he confessed.
I brushed my fingers through his hair. “You can have me. I’m yours.”
He shook his head sadly. “No. No, I can’t.”
Chapter 24
THERE HAS TO BE A foot of snow out there,” I commented, looking out the French doors that opened onto the balcony.
Big, fat snowflakes fell heavily from the sky coating the ground in a fuzzy looking blanket. I itched to go outside and play in the snow, but we weren’t allowed out, and the only outdoor area Theo could sneak me into was the garden, which was currently protected from the weather with a shield so it was green all winter.
“I wish I could go out there,” I mused.
“Ew, why?” Theo asked, picking under his nails with his dagger. He must’ve been bored or maybe trying to distract himself, because if he was like me all I could think about was how good it felt when we kissed. “It’s cold, and wet, and disgusting.”
“Have you ever built a snowman?” I asked him.
“No.”
I gasped and swiveled away from the window. “Are you even human?”
“Um … no. I’m an enchanter.”
I leveled him with a glare. “Yeah, but you’re still human. Building a snowman is like a rite of passage or something.”
He sighed and tucked his dagger back into his jeans. “Never done it.”
I shook my head. “One day, you and I are building a snowman.”
He chuckled. “Whatever you say.”
“When’s your birthday?” I asked him.
He snorted. “What made you ask me that?”
I shrugged. “I realized I didn’t know when it was. You knew when mine was, it only seems fair I know yours.”
“December twenty-sixth,” he replied with a grumpy sigh.
“That’s two weeks from now,” I remarked.
“I know.”
“You don’t sound very happy about it.”
“I don’t much like my birthday.” He turned away, staring at the wall.
“Why?” I ventured.
He looked back at me with a resigned expression. “Any time something bad happens it’s always on my birthday.”
A pounding on my door had us both turning. Theo jumped up at the ready.
“Let me in,” demanded Adelaide.
Theo cursed under his breath and opened the door.
“Have I told you you’re a major pain in my ass?” he growled at his sister.
She smiled beatifically up at him. “Only once this week.”
She flopped down on my bed with her laptop and opened it up. “Get your cute butt over here, Mara. We need to pick out dresses for the masked ball.”
“Masked ball?”
“They have one every year on Christmas,” she explained. “It’s so much fun. Enchanters from the nearby cities come.”
“Is that safe with what happened in New York?”
She shrugged. “They might not let outsiders in this year or they might just heighten security. I don’t really know the details, nor do I give a flying fuck. All I care about is getting a smoking hot dress that makes Finn cum in his pants when he sees me.”
“La-la-la. I did not hear you say that.” Theo glared at his sister with his hands slapped over his ears.
She rolled her eyes. “Hide in the bathroom if you’re that sensitive. Now come on.” She patted the space beside her on my bed.
I lay down on my stomach and she brought
up a website with the most beautiful dresses.
“I could slay that one.” She pointed to a jade-green dress with a thigh-high slit.
“No way. Nope. Not happening,” Theo growled over our shoulders.
She turned to glare at him. “Go away.”
“That color would be pretty on you.” I pointed to a deep-plum-red dress. It was beautiful but a lot less revealing.
“It’s pretty,” she agreed and kept scrolling. “Ooh, I like this one but I’m way too pale for it.” She was referring to a minty-green, long, chiffon skirt with a matching halter-top. “This one would be pretty on you.” She stopped at deep purple ombre dress.
I wrinkled my nose. “It’s pretty but not my style. How do we get these anyway? I thought this place was protected from humans?”
Adelaide looked at me like and shook her head. “We have our own delivery system. Anything you order comes through that. It’s also inspected before it’s brought to the manor, because … well, bad people ruin all the fun.”
She turned back to the computer and continued to scroll. “I have found my dress,” she sing-songed, and clicked on a cobalt-blue, mermaid-style gown. It was fitted, and I knew it would be stunning on her with her curvy figure. “I am so going to drop jaws.” She clicked her size and added it to the cart. “Now we need to find yours.” She pushed her laptop over to me. “You look. I have to go pee.” She hopped off my bed and scurried into the bathroom.
“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to,” Theo told me.
I shook my head. “It sounds fun.”
He sighed and cracked a smile. “You only want to see me in a tux, don’t you, doll face?”
My cheeks colored. If I was as affected by Theo as is, I’d probably drop my panties in a heartbeat if I saw him in a tuxedo.
“It’s actually kind of fun. The food’s good.” He shrugged and scratched Nigel behind his ears.
I laughed. “The food’s always good here.”
“True,” he agreed. “I hate the socializing part, though.”
I snorted. “You hate socializing? Well, I’m downright shocked.”
He chuckled. “There’s no need for your sarcasm.”
“Is it truly sarcasm when it’s fact?” I countered.
“I guess not.” He sobered and took a breath. “At least this year I’ll have you as my date.” He paled when he realized what he said. “Not that we’re dating, or even can date, but as your protector, I’ll escort you.”
“Don’t worry,” I began, my voice hard and resigned, “I know you didn’t mean it as a real date.”
He winced. “Mara—”
“It’s okay. I get it, I really do. You don’t need to explain.”
His jaw clenched but the bathroom door opened. Adelaide saw us and stopped in the doorway. “Uh … I’m not interrupting something, am I?”
“No, not at all.” Theo strode back over to the door to my room and sat down on the floor.
Adelaide looked at me skeptically as she took her place beside me.
I scrolled through the website clicking on dresses here and there. There were plenty of pretty dresses, beautiful ones, but none of them felt like me.
“Ugh, I don’t like any of these,” I groaned.
“You’re too picky,” Adelaide scolded. “Here, give it to me.”
She sat up and took her laptop back. She hid the screen from me as she scrolled through the pages.
“A-ha,” she finally cried. “This is the dress. I know it. But please, keep your mind blank so you don’t hate it right off the bat. It’s perfect.”
She slowly and gently placed the laptop in front of me. I gasped. She was right. It was perfect.
The dress was a silvery-gray color with flowered detailing on the top and part of the bottom. It was flowy and soft, not showy at all, and perfectly me.
“You like it? You do, right?”
“It’s beautiful.”
She smiled and clapped her hands excitedly. “I knew it was perfect. Now we just need masks.”
A couple of minutes later she’d selected a peacock mask for herself and a plain silver lace one for me. She placed the order for our stuff and closed her laptop. I had no idea how it got delivered, maybe by magical little fairies flying the stuff through the air, or maybe for all I knew it was an enchanted website and everything appeared in Victor’s office the moment it was ordered so he could inspect it.
“So, what’s with the enchanters and masks?” I asked.
“Nothing, really. We’re not allowed to wear costumes for Halloween, so we wear masks instead. The ball is a masked ball, because why not? The mystery of the masks covering your face makes it fun. It’s been tradition since like … forever. So, why mess with tradition? By the way, how are things with you and Winston?”
I shrugged, and it didn’t escape my notice that Theo perked up to listen at the change in conversation.
“We haven’t talked much,” I admitted. “The last time I was really with him was the day the alarm went off and he took us to his room. I don’t really know what to say to him and I can’t blame him for steering clear.”
Adelaide sighed. “You should at least try to talk to him. He deserves it.”
I knew she was right, but it still made me feel sick. I wasn’t the best at this kind of thing.
I rolled over onto my back and she quickly swiped her laptop out of the way so I didn’t kill it.
“I promise I’ll try to make the effort to speak with him.”
“A bit of advice, Mara, maybe don’t be quite so formal with him.”
I snorted. “Noted.”
“I think Churchill should stop being such a pussy. He must be blind and an idiot if he couldn’t see Mara wasn’t into him,” Theo spoke up.
Adelaide rolled her eyes. “Only you’d say that because you’re hopelessly in love with her and she loves you too.” She grabbed her laptop and slid off my bed. “Ta-ta for now,” she called sarcastically and slipped out of my room.
Theo sighed. “I’m burning her Christmas present.”
“You already bought her a present? What’d you get her?”
“A cat,” he replied with a smirk and I knew he was lying.
“It probably wouldn’t be a good idea to burn a cat.”
“S’pose not,” he agreed with a shrug.
I returned to my position by the window looking at. “I miss it,” I whispered.
“What?” he asked and stood, coming to stand beside me to peer outside.
“The air, the feel of the sun on my skin. I hate that we can’t go out there. I feel trapped.”
He frowned. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
He shrugged and shoved his hands in the pockets of his pants. “For messing up your whole life. Things were normal for you … good, great I guess … but then everything changed and I had to come. I had to take you away and I’m sorry. I wish things could be simpler for you.”
“It’s not your fault.”
He sighed. “I know, but sometimes it feels like it.”
“I was born an enchanter. I might not have known it, but that’s who I was—who I am. You can’t change that. It’s your job to keep me safe and you’ve done it. I’m lucky to have you.”
He swallowed, his gray eyes meeting mine. They were an infinite sea of pain and sadness. “I couldn’t keep them safe, but I won’t make that mistake with you.”
“You’re talking about your parents?”
He nodded. “Yeah.”
“You were a boy,” I breathed. “It wasn’t your job to save them—but you did save your sister. You protected her long before you had to protect me. You kept her alive and safe. Focus on that.”
“It still hurts, though,” he admitted. “Knowing my actions caused their death.”
“You were a boy,” I reminded him again. “You trusted them to tell them about me, and when they figured out what you were they had to trust others to protect you. Someone along the way compromised som
ething, or leaked it on purpose, that’s not your fault Theo. It’s not. It’s on them—whoever gave up an innocent family.”
“You’re right,” he whispered. “But it doesn’t hurt any less.”
“It’s okay to hurt. It’s okay to miss them. I … I still miss my dad. I always will. And I hate—hate—that he died because of me, but I can’t change it. What I can do is refuse to give up and fight like hell to punish the man who did this.”
Theo stared at me. “Wow,” he murmured.
“What?” I blinked, taken aback.
“You amaze me more and more every day. You’re a force to be reckoned with. A mighty and vibrant storm they’ll never see coming. You’ll slay them all and I can’t wait to see them lay dead at your feet, finally defeated.”
“You think I can do it? Take them on and win?”
He smiled, the barest twitch of his lips. “I know you can. I’ve always known.”
Chapter 25
I FINISHED UP WITH MY lessons for the day, grabbed a snack, and ditched Theo while he was taking a shower. He’d kill me for leaving and I’m sure he’d reprimand me thoroughly, but it was time I stopped being a baby and talked to Winston. I needed to explain to him how I never meant to use him and I truly did care for him, but not in the way he wanted.
I meandered down the hallway, finding my way easily to his room. When I first arrived, I thought I’d never learn my way around this place, but after a while it all made sense. I stopped in front of his door and took a moment to gather myself. I took a deep breath and knocked.
The door opened slowly, and he sighed when he saw it was me. Opening the door wider, he leaned in the doorway and crossed his arms over his chest. “Mara, to what do I owe this pleasure?”
“C-Can I come in?”
He hesitated and after a second of thought moved aside to let me in. I wrung my hands together, feeling nervous and awkward being here. He closed the door and turned to face me. He wasn’t going to start this conversation, that much was obvious.
“Hi,” I blurted awkwardly.
“’Ello.” He cracked a smile.
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “I wanted to apologize. I want you to know it was never my intention to hurt you. I like you, Winston, a lot, but as a friend. I tried to feel something more, I wanted to, but I didn’t. You’re a great guy and you deserve so much better than me. My heart belongs to someone else even though I never meant to give it away. It’s just … his.” I took a breath and wetted my lips. “But I’m sorry, truly sorry for hurting you.”
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