“See?! Alex understands,” Michelle said.
“What do I understand?”
“Come on, you never heard your parents doing it?” she asked Alex.
“No!” Alex shuddered.
Cassidy noticed Dylan approaching from behind Alex.
Alex looked directly at Michelle. “No one should hear their parents having sex—ever. There’s not enough therapy or alcohol for that.”
“Good to know I won’t need to go broke on shrinks and beer,” Dylan chimed.
Alex’s jaw dropped.
Cassidy burst out laughing.
“Just kidding, Alex,” Dylan tried to let her off the hook.
“No, he’s not,” Michelle said. “Look at his face! See? It’s traumatizing.”
Dylan laughed.
“Did you need something, honey?” Cassidy asked her son.
“Apparently, I need therapy since Alex won’t let me have a beer.”
“Stop talking,” Alex said. “Please.”
The group fell into a fit of laughter at Alex’s horrified expression. Despite her best effort, Alex joined them.
***
“This place gets crazier every year,” Maureen said with a chuckle.
“Sure does,” Pearl agreed. Candace and Jameson’s family went far beyond biology. The deep bonds of friendship and love allowed it to grow beyond traditional definition. “Good thing Candy will have a bigger yard soon.” She detected the worry in Maureen’s eyes. It had been a difficult week for Jameson. As a mother, Pearl understood Maureen’s concerns. Pearl worried about Candace the same way. She was confident in one outcome—their family would stick together even if heaven itself fell. “Don’t worry about them,” Pearl said. “The thing about this family is the crazy is what keeps us sane.”
Maureen’s eyes fell on Jameson. Jameson was holding Candace close. Cooper was climbing into Candace’s lap. She heard Michelle yell at Jonah in the distance and the laughter that followed. She smiled. “Truer words,” she said. Truer words.
FRIDAY
“I can’t believe we haven’t caught a thing.”
Jameson grabbed a beer from the cooler. “Should’ve gone down to the river instead.”
Jonah set his fishing pole aside. “So, you’re kidless for a couple of days, huh?”
Jameson shrugged.
“Uh-oh, not happy about that?” Jonah guessed.
“You mean Coop being away for a couple of days?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m not unhappy about it.”
Jonah nodded.
“Jonah? Want to tell me what’s going on?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’d like to think I know you pretty well. What’s up?”
Jonah had been mulling over Pearl’s advice for days. He still wasn’t sure what to say to Jameson. “Nothing is up.”
“Right. Did I do something to upset you?”
“No,” Jonah answered quickly. “Why would you say that?”
“Maybe because you asked me to go fishing but you’ve barely spoken two sentences since we got here.” Jameson handed Jonah a beer. “Maybe that’ll help.”
“I’m not upset, JD. I guess I feel bad about asking you to spend the day fishing.”
“Why?”
“Coop for one thing.”
“What does Cooper have to do with you and me going fishing?” Jameson wondered.
Jonah made no reply.
Jameson rubbed her eyes and groaned. JD, you idiot. How did you not see this? “Jonah.”
“You’ve got so much going on. Coop’s little. The last thing you need is my shit,” Jonah said.
“I must’ve missed something. When were you giving me shit?”
“You know what I mean.”
“No, I don’t.” Jameson sighed. “You think because your mom and I have Cooper that I don’t have time for you?”
“That’s not it.”
“Yeah, I think it is.”
“No. You’ve got a million things going on.”
“Yeah? So do you. None of those things are more important than you are—not to me.”
Jonah picked up a stick and started drawing in the dirt.
“I’m sorry, Jonah.”
“For what?”
“For being so preoccupied lately. If you want to know the truth, I don’t want to bother you.”
“Bother me?”
“You’re running the firm. You’ve got two little ones and you have all the bullshit Laura’s father has dropped in your life. I figured if you had time or you needed me, you’d let me know.”
“About that.”
“What?” Jameson asked.
“Did Laura’s dad have anything to do with what happened the day of Mom’s speech?”
Jameson shook her head. “I don’t know. It’s not important, though.”
“Bullshit, it isn’t.”
“Jonah.”
“What? Screw that, JD. First, he comes at Mom, then Laura, then he goes after Coop—now, you? I don’t give a shit if he is her father. I hate that guy. I mean that. I hate him.”
“He’s not exactly my favorite person either.”
Jonah bristled. “And, that asshole Tyler? I wish I’d been with Toby when he ran into him.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“I’m okay, Jonah.”
“It’s bullshit—all of it. You don’t get it.”
“What don’t I get?”
“It’s like I told you before, I can’t do anything.”
“I’d say you’re doing a lot,” Jameson replied. “The firm is thriving. Laura loves you. The kids are happy. What do you need to do?”
Jonah shook his head.
“Jonah?”
“What if I fuck it all up?”
“Which ‘it’ do you mean?”
“Any of it—all of it. The only reason the firm is doing so well is that people still see it as yours.”
“That’s not true.”
“Yes, it is. You built it. What if I ruin it?”
“That’s not going to happen,” Jameson said. “I don’t want to hear it. You and Mel were handling almost all of it well before I stepped aside. Where is this coming from?”
Jonah let out an exasperated sigh. “I have no idea what I’m doing.”
“With?”
“JD… What if I…”
“What if you what?”
“What if I end up like him?”
“Who?”
“What if I end up like my father?”
“Your dad isn’t such a bad guy.”
“No, but he wasn’t such a great father either.”
“He loves you, Jonah.”
“You sound like Mom.”
“Your mother doesn’t lie.”
“I barely saw him. I still barely see him.” Jonah twirled the stick in his hands. “Shit. How am I supposed to be someone’s dad when I feel like a little kid half the time?”
Jameson’s expression softened. “Welcome to the club.”
Jonah looked up.
“Oh, you think you’re the only one? I hate to break it to you; you’re not. Your mom still runs to Pearl. You don’t think I’ve cried on my mother’s shoulder or bitched to my dad about things? Jonah, if there is one thing being with your mom has taught me it’s that none of us ever really grow up. At least, not when it comes to wanting to run to our parents. That doesn’t change when you have kids.”
“Maybe not.”
“Come on, what’s really bothering you?”
“Pearl thinks I’m jealous of Cooper.”
Jameson nodded. “Are you?”
“Maybe. I just wonder what it would have been like to have them both around—to have you both around.”
Jameson smiled. “Thanks for saying that.”
“You’re thanking me? For being an asshole?”
“You’re not an asshole. I get it. Not in the same way, but I think I understand. I was lucky. My parents were bot
h there for me. It’s not like things were always perfect, but they were always there for all of us. So, I don’t know what that’s like—having an absentee parent. I do know what it’s like to feel you missed something with someone you love.”
Jonah was curious.
“I missed this huge chunk of all your lives. Sometimes, that’s hard,” she said. “Your mom feels that too. She wonders what life would have been like if her mother had been different.”
“She had Grandma Pearl.”
“She did, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t miss her mother. It’s like Laura being close to your mom. That doesn’t replace Mary or her father, no matter how much she dislikes what he does.”
“I know.”
“It’s true for Cooper too. Cooper loves us. We didn’t replace his mother. It’s a new relationship. Someday, he will have this conversation with someone—what would his life have been like had she been different? It doesn’t mean he doesn’t love us. It’s just human.”
“I guess I just miss this,” Jonah said.
“Fishing?” Jameson teased.
“Hanging out.”
“Me too. You can always come to me, Jonah—me or your mom. It doesn’t matter how old you are or what is going on in our lives. And, before you say anything, that won’t change if your mom gets elected. That won’t ever change.”
Jonah nodded. “Can I ask you something else?”
“Shoot.”
“Do you ever wish you and Mom… I mean, that you could have had us together?”
“All the time.”
***
“I’m glad Jonah is spending the day with JD,” Laura told Candace.
“Me too.”
“He doesn’t say much, but I can tell he misses her.”
“She misses him too. What about you? How are you doing?” Candace asked.
“Better than I think anyone believes.”
Candace nodded.
“I can’t let my father have that control over me anymore. I’ll never understand him. It’s funny. I think I’ve just started to accept that you can love someone you don’t like very much.”
Candace was impressed by her daughter-in-law’s wisdom. Love didn’t come with conditions. Relationships did. That was a reality in life that Candace knew few people ever fully grasped. No matter how much you loved someone, sometimes you had to let them go. Sometimes, a person you loved was not someone who made your life better. Those were some of the most painful moments in life.
“That’s true,” Candace said.
“I don’t know how to explain it,” Laura said. “If my father wasn’t who he is, I probably wouldn’t know Jonah. My life would be totally different. Don’t get me wrong, there are parts of my life I could do without. But I love my family. I would never change that.”
“Believe me, I understand.” Candace giggled when Sophie pushed away her bottle. “This family has certainly grown.”
“Good thing the White House has so many bedrooms,” Laura said.
Candace laughed. “They’ll be lucky if it stays white if we make it there.”
“Do you hope that you do?”
Candace kissed the baby’s head. “The truth?”
“Yeah.”
“Most of the time, I do.”
“And, the rest of the time?”
Candace placed Sophie on her shoulder. “Part of me wonders why I can’t be content with this.”
“Burping babies?”
“Being Nana,” Candace replied.
“You’ll still be Nana when you’re president.”
“True, but that won’t be the role that occupies most of my time.”
“I don’t think it’s the amount of time you spend with them that matters,” Laura said. “You’re always Nana. Just like JD is always Jay Jay. I guess I shouldn’t speak for anyone else, but I think we all know you’re there for us when we need you.”
“We are. Sometimes, I wonder if you feel you have to ask.”
“Ask?”
“For us to be there. For me to be there.”
“I don’t think that would be any different if you retired altogether,” Laura said.
“No?”
“No, I don’t. I mean, it’s not unlike having JJ and Sophie.”
Candace was curious. “How so?”
“The other day, JJ told me that Sophie needs us more. I understood what he meant. I had to explain to him that Sophie needs us differently, not more. I think that’s just the way life is. You have a lot of people who look to you,” Laura said. “But that’s part of the reason they do look to you. We all get that.”
Candace moved Sophie to her lap. Sophie smiled and giggled at her Nana.
“See? Sophie agrees. Can I tell you something?” Laura asked cautiously.
“You can tell me anything.”
“You really do need to give yourself a break, Mom. Sometimes, Jonah and Shell? They don’t see how much of a toll everything takes on you. Marianne and JD do. I see it too. It’s not the campaign. It’s because you feel guilty about running it. Don’t. We do need you. That doesn’t mean other people don’t need you too. They just need you differently.”
Candace had thought when Laura arrived that their visit would center around Laura’s life. She wasn’t surprised. She’d been impressed by Laura’s intelligence and thoughtfulness the moment Jonah introduced them. “You know,” she said. “Jonah is lucky to have you as his partner.”
“I don’t know. I’m glad that things worked out for us, though.”
“Mm. Do you still think about pursuing the political arena?”
“Someday,” Laura said. “I’d like to think I could make a difference.”
“I’ve no doubt,” Candace said. “When you’re ready, you let me know.”
“I don’t expect you to…”
“I’m not saying that because you’re my daughter-in-law or because I love you. You have a lot to offer, Laura. I’ve always known that.”
“I think you might be biased.”
“I’m definitely biased. That doesn’t make it any less true. You let me know when you have some idea what you might like to do—whenever that might be.”
“Do you really think I could do it?”
“I don’t think so. I know so.” Candace smiled. “How do you feel about leftover Chinese food?”
“Love it, so does JJ. All he ever asks for is chicken fingers and fortune cookies.”
Candace looked at Sophie. “We’ll break you in soon enough,” she promised. “Let’s go find your big brother and raid Nana’s refrigerator. What do you think?”
Sophie giggled.
“No doubt who she’s related to,” Laura said.
“I keep telling Jameson it’s biological. She doesn’t believe me.”
“I’ll make sure to let her know it’s been passed down—strengthen the argument.”
Candace laughed. You will do well one day, Laura. You will do well.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
August 18th
“The polls have narrowed, Candace.”
“And?”
“You can’t ignore this story about Jameson any longer.”
Candace glared at Glenn.
“You can be as pissed at me as you want. It’s not going away.”
“It’s a load of crap.”
“And?”
“I’m not subjecting Jameson to that.”
“Subjecting me to what?” Jameson walked into the room.
Candace bit her lip to suppress her rising frustration.
“Well?” Jameson urged.
“It’s nothing,” Candace said.
Jameson looked at Glenn. His expression was a dead giveaway.
“Would you excuse us, Glenn?” Jameson requested privacy.
Glenn picked up a few files and headed toward the door.
“Close the door,” Jameson told him. “Feel like telling me what that was all about?”
“No.”
“Why would that be?”
/>
“Jameson, let it be.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Jameson.”
“Don’t do that. We’ve been down this road before. You don’t get to make decisions about what’s best for me without my input.”
“This is different.”
Jameson sat down on the coffee table that faced the sofa Candace occupied. She had a guess what Glenn and Candace’s discussion pertained to. “I do read the paper and watch the news,” Jameson said.
Candace shook her head.
“It’s time,” Jameson said. “It’s not going away.”
“No.”
“You don’t get to make this decision.”
“It’s my campaign.”
“It’s my life and my reputation.”
“Jameson, this is not something you need to talk to anyone about.”
“I think we’re beyond that now. Look, we both knew that our relationship would factor into this election. We knew they were going to come at us.”
“This is not the same,” Candace argued.
“Yes, it is. The Russia story hasn’t gained them any ground. Hammering me has.”
“You have nothing to defend.”
“No, I don’t. I’m not going to defend myself. Glenn wants me to do an interview—one on one with this on the table,” Jameson said.
“How did you know…”
“I have ears, Candace.”
Candace threw her head back. “I can’t ask you to do this.”
“You didn’t.”
“Glenn asking is the same thing.”
“I’m offering,” Jameson said.
“I don’t like it.”
“I don’t like it either. I need to do this.”
“Why?” Candace asked. “For my campaign or for you?”
“Both.”
Candace sighed and covered her face.
Jameson took Candace’s hands and pulled them from her eyes. “Hey, we are in this together. Okay? It’s okay.”
“It’s not even a little bit okay.”
Jameson moved to the sofa and pulled Candace into her arms. “It is. You have to stop thinking I’m made of glass.”
“I don’t think that.”
“Maybe not. You can’t make decisions that affect me like this without talking to me. That’s not fair.”
“I feel responsible.”
“For Wolfe’s people being assholes or for Jed Tyler?”
“You know what I mean,” Candace said.
Election Day (By Design Book 10) Page 21
