Mercy F*uck

by K. S. Adkins

  “Why did you say it?”

  “For the same reason I came to the bar every single one of your shifts, fixed your Jeep, made you go to frat parties and bought the Impala.” At my confused look, he smiles and whispered, “To keep the sharks away, Drew. To protect my girl, keep her for myself until she was ready for me.”

  “I didn’t want them,” I say pitifully.

  “You think any motherfucker with a working dick on campus gave a fuck about that? You were a fantasy and every guy I knew wanted a piece of you. So yes, I said it. I was twenty-one and just took your virginity. I make it out to be the best night of my life and guess what happens? I find myself with competition and I wasn’t letting that happen. Couldn’t risk it.” Back the fucking truck up!

  “You expect me to believe you were protecting me?”

  “Did then, am now.”

  “Stop with the caveman speak and explain what that even means!”

  “Someone is gunning for you, possibly me, maybe even both of us. I wasn’t followed here, I made sure of it. So whoever that was knows you, your routine. Until we figure it out, I’m not leaving your side. Which is good because it gives us time to work out your issues.”

  “You can’t be serious,” I wheeze like a life-long smoker.

  “Oh, I’m serious,” he smiles like he’d won. “Bestie.”

  “Hell no,” I argue lamely.

  “It’ll be like old times,” he grinned while running his hands up and down my arms.

  “I’m serious, Axle, no. We aren’t kids anymore. You have a job; I have a job –”

  As if I was talking to myself he cuts me off. “I have my work cut out for me. Luckily, I don’t shy away from hard labor. Though by accident, I cemented this hate in you,” he says stroking my cheek. “Alls I gotta do is break the foundation. Get you to forgive me because it’s forgivable and we both know it.”

  “Shut up,” I warn him.

  “There’s love for me underneath, Drew, you buried it but I’m determined to dig it up.”

  “God dammit,” I snap trying to break his hold. “Stop talking!”

  “I’ll keep it safe this time,” he whispered and I felt the sincerity. “I haven’t changed. I’m still the guy who wants to invest in you. Shit, I was all in before we even had sex. I know the difference between lust and love. Lust is fleeting, love is you. You left before I could show you that guy, Drew. You shouldn’t have left.”

  Crying freely, I try pulling away; only he won’t let me. Pinning my arms behind my back he kisses me once and then slays me with his words. “You weren’t a mercy fuck, I was. You could have had anyone, hell, they were lined up. But you chose me. You chose me, God dammit.”

  I did choose him. Even if I could do it all over again knowing the outcome would still be the same the next morning, I’d choose him all over again. The night I spent with him was everything. It was the morning after that I can’t seem to get beyond. Weighing his words, I take a risk by asking him, “How do we get back to being friends?”

  “I don’t want a friend. I want those fucking years back.”

  “You’re asking a lot of me. How do I just let go of nine years of hate?”

  “Not hate, hurt.”

  This was true but, “I don’t know where to start,” I say honestly.

  “You can stop fucking the Lions’ offense, that’s a start.”

  And with that, I nutted him.

  Again.

  Mike was on his knees gasping for air when my fist connected to the back of his head. “I fucking told you,” I grunted when I realized I’d busted my hand. “Don’t look at her.”

  “I didn’t look!”

  “You not only looked,” I roared kicking him in the gut. “But you ran your fucking mouth too.”

  “I didn’t say shit that wasn’t true!”

  “You came to my fucking place running your mouth and ruined the moment, asshole. Because of you showing up, I left her in bed alone and came back to her leaving.”

  “The hell does that have to do with me, Axle?”

  Great fucking question and the answer was nothing, but I needed someone to take it out on. My girl took off, as in…gone. “You’re beating my ass over a mercy fuck?”

  “She is not a mercy fuck,” I vowed. “She’s mine.”

  Then I put him out of his misery.

  But it didn’t cure my own.

  After taking another blow to the nuts last night, it was clear Drew was fully committed to hating me now.

  Or, if given a get out of jail free card; manslaughter.

  The small amount of headway I made by setting the record straight was ruined by letting my jealousy show.

  I also made a mental note to always watch what her right knee was doing because, fuck.

  Refusing to let a setback get in my way, I came to the bar when her shift started and I haven’t left. Since she isn’t speaking to me, I decided to introduce myself to her staff. None of them know what to do with me yet so I decided to make it clear I wasn’t leaving, by finding a wall to occupy. Right away I realized Tiny was, hands down, the world's worst bouncer.

  The guy was a monster. I didn’t get it. What a waste…

  Luis, the bar back, doesn’t say much but nods his answers instead. The guy I liked least was Fudge, her lone head of security and all around grumpy asshole. He wasn’t a big guy but he was cagey as fuck, which was almost worse.

  Shane was the man-boy I’d seen and Drew’s shadow. The kid did whatever she told him to do and he did it well.

  For some time, she’s been the lone bartender but has slowly been showing Shane the ropes. Shane explained she was looking to hire another guy behind the bar but has kicked out the last six that came in to interview. Apparently, she doesn’t hire pussies or perverts. She also doesn’t take shit, accept excuses, or allow laziness.

  However, as far as bosses went, her guys adored her. As in, they would light themselves on fire if she asked.

  I saw for myself they were treated like family; a family she was the head of.

  I also found out Drew owned The Hole.

  Because Shane has a big mouth and loved to sing her praises, I found out she owns several other places too. Where The Hole was her spot, the others were pure business. He claims she has managers and partners that handle those venues. He also claims she’s beyond successful, lives and breathes work and never takes time off. Guess that’s why she could afford the Regal…

  “Don’t you have a job?” she asks from behind the bar she had just finished wiping down.

  “Yeah,” I nod once. “You.”

  “Right,” she says with enough attitude to drop a weaker man where he stood. Good thing I’m not weak. “If you’re going to take up space, at least do something useful and take Shane out back.”

  “You want me to kill the kid?”

  “No,” she sighs then rolling her eyes as if I’m the idiot here. “I want you to teach him how to fight.”

  “Teach him how to fight?”

  “Dirty.”

  “Dirty?”

  “Really dirty.”

  “Why haven’t you?”

  Setting down the towels in her hand, she approaches and I wanted to pull her to me and kiss her but, I didn’t. I didn’t because I liked my nuts and they finally dropped back into place this morning. “He needs to learn from a man,” she admits for my ears only. “His dad is rough on him so he needs to learn, from you. Not me, you.”

  “Rough how?”

  “He’s barely twenty-one living at home with an abusive parent who happens to be a cop with a chip on his shoulder,” she explains with frustration lacing her words. “He deserves a fighting chance, literally.”

  “That’s why you hired him, isn’t it?”

  “He’s a good kid,” she shrugs in a way only she could. As if helping the kid out was no big deal. The Hole was a well-oiled machine. She didn’t need the kid. She hired him so she could keep an eye on him, protect him.

  “Plus, I’ve alwa
ys wanted a little brother to boss around.” That was Drew, using sarcasm to hide her feelings.

  And because it was Drew I said, “I’ll teach him.”

  “You let him know this was your idea too,” she whispers leaning in but not too close. It killed me she was leery of me now. Another problem I’d be correcting. “And if you’re going to be on my ass all the fucking time, find a job to do.”

  “I can do that. I’ll bartend,” I grin in victory. “With you.”

  “Whatever,” she calls out sauntering away. “You won’t last the night.”

  Drew was cute if she thought I couldn’t handle passing out drinks.

  The Hole was open two nights a week, Friday and Saturday, that was it.

  Again, simple.

  Like the woman.

  I’d show her, I could serve drinks in my fucking sleep.

  Calling for Shane, I signaled for him to follow me out back and proceeded to tell him how it was going to be. Needless to say, he didn’t know me from dick and was skeptical. I used the angle that all of her employees needed to know how to throw down. Eyeing me, he asked, “Why do you care if I can fight?”

  “Because my woman cares.”

  “You mean Drew? I’m pretty sure she hates you.”

  “She’s just playing hard to get,” I assure him. “Now, take a swing.”

  The look of fear crossed his face but I caught it. Shane wasn’t small by any means. I’d put him around five ten, one hundred seventy-five pounds and still growing into his man's body. He wasn’t fit but he had muscle. Strength could be built, honed, and harnessed. But that wasn’t happening until we got rid of the fear. Fear, while an asset could be your enemy too. My guess was this kid had spent his life getting his ass handed to him and never even considered fighting back. I was more than happy to be the one who taught him otherwise. To this day, I was still on the fence as to which I liked better; my first fight or my first orgasm. Both were pretty fucking amazing for a lot of different reasons. Shane would have to decide for himself which he liked better, it was a guy’s rite of passage. But first, I had to show him the right way to make a fist so he didn’t break his own hand.

  “You good?” he asked, checking my fist.

  “Yeah,” I said stretching the ache out. “I’m good.”

  “Glad your dad taught you how to make a fist.”

  “Me too.”

  “I’ll be back in five minutes,” he said kissing my knuckles.

  I was so undone by that it took me a moment to find my voice to ask, “Where are you going?”

  “To kick that fucker’s ass.”

  Of course, I followed, this was Axle. However, I wanted the sweet sucker punch I landed on record before the guy was tossed out.

  But if I didn’t like some random grabbing my ass, Axle really didn’t like it.

  He also had the guy on the ground begging for mercy in less than two minutes.

  The least of his problems was my clip to the jaw after the beating Axle put on him. In comparison to Axle's fury, my punch was a love tap.

  I was watching Axle show Shane how to make a fist.

  He was twenty-one and didn’t know how to do it properly.

  He’d been used to taking beatings never giving one and if anyone could fast track Shane, it was Axle.

  The man knew his way around a fight. He was always the first to stick up for the ones who couldn’t stick up for themselves. Hell, he even stepped in for those who could. The man just loved to fight. Axle always said a man should defend and protect. He took both seriously. He has a younger brother named Ace who had a learning disability growing up. Ace used to get bullied a lot so Axle took up for his kid brother and anyone else who needed it.

  Mr. Rhodes didn’t have time for his boys so Axle picked up the slack.

  Unlike my dad who taught his daughters right from wrong. The eldest of five girls, my dad did not fuck around with me. He made it clear I was an example to my siblings. He was strict but fair. He never took his hands to us in anger and he never used his size to intimidate us either.

  But he taught me how to defend myself and in return, I taught my sisters.

  The look of fear on Shane’s face at the thought of defending himself broke my heart. This was a learned behavior. Shane was taught to fear his dad and if anyone could help him work through that, it was the bad boy who was gentle with the scared boy. Because that’s what Shane was around his dad. He wasn’t a man, but a terrified child.

  I’d fight the world for you, Drew.

  Nine years ago I believed that with all my heart.

  The question was, could I believe that now?

  “Where is he?” I hear from behind me and his voice grated the only working nerve I possessed. I was also irritated with myself because I thought I locked the door behind me. Well shit.

  “He’s off today,” I lie then turn to face him. He was wearing street clothes and I knew what that meant. Daddy dearest was off duty and wanted to party. He wanted to make sure his son wouldn’t be witness to it. Points to pops for thinking ahead. Points to me for having party favors.

  “I know he’s sleeping with you, slut, now where is he?”

  “Not here,” I say moving away from the exit.

  This guy wasn’t getting anywhere near that back door while I was breathing.

  “He ain’t been home, ain’t answerin’ my calls and that’s ‘cause of you.”

  “I’m his boss, not his mother,” I clip and then I reminded myself this prick was law enforcement which meant if it came down to it, I’d have to let him hit me first. That way when the cameras picked it up and it was used as evidence, I wouldn’t go to fucking jail, again. Make no mistake, this man wanted to hurt me and I had to let him. I wouldn’t like it, but such was life.

  “All by yourself then, huh?”

  By appearance, I’m probably the least threatening thing in any room but everyone knows not to judge by appearance. Well, everyone but this guy. “I’m off duty,” he grinned at me in victory and it was a crying shame Shane took after his dad in the looks department. Seeing that he was working to intimidate me, I moved in his space and then past him, planning to show him the door. By putting myself in close proximity, I knew he’d grab me and when I was close, he did. “I’m talking to you, slut.”

  “Were you?” I ask looking down at his fingers roughly clutching my arm. “I’m sorry, I don’t speak dumbass.”

  When he backhanded me I didn’t fake my stumble, the man hit that hard and I was lucky I didn’t crumble. Laughing at my struggle, he pushes me in the chest forcing me to hit the bar top with my upper back. Not only did my body knock the bottles over, my breath left me in a whoosh and while getting my bearings, I was rewarded with a quick jab to the eye. Once my head recovered, I shook it and gave him my best smile.

  Now I could fight back.

  “Cut my boy loose,” he sneers down at me. “Or I will make your life a living hell.”

  With an uppercut, I split his lip which got his attention, but it was short lived when Axle and Shane stormed in.

  Shrieking in outrage, Shane lunges forward but I tagged him around the waist to stop him. I knew we made a sight with my arms around his waist and my feet dangling behind me on the floor while he attempts to drag me with him. “Let me go, Drew,” he roared wanting a piece of his dad who looked shocked he socked me in the first place.

  “Take him out back, Axle,” I instruct him.

  “I’d rather break this motherfucker’s neck, Drew,” he declares by clenching his fists.

  “Assaulting an officer wouldn’t be smart, asshole,” he warns Axle but never takes his eyes off me.

  “Never claimed to be smart. Thing is, I don’t see an officer,” Axle warns him while I did everything I could to keep Shane still and was losing the battle. “What I do see is a man who just made a serious mistake.”

  “No one will take your word over a cop’s, that’s a fact. Shane, get the fuck over here.”

  “Don’t move,” I w
hisper fiercely. As if just realizing I was attached to him, he looks down at me and cringes.

  “He hit you?” he asked gently touching my face.

  “You hit her!” he then screams at his dad. “Why would you hit her?”

  “She’s fucking with your head, boy. She’s using you, perverting you.”

  “He thinks I’m sleeping with Shane,” I say to Axle with a one eye roll since the other was swelling up.

  “I’m not having sex with her!” Shane roared again. “She’s my friend and my boss!”

  If Shane wanted to break free he could. He may not be a fighter but he was definitely physically stronger than I was. “Axle,” I say with authority and a touch of desperation because my arms were really burning. “Take him out back, now.”

  “You ain’t taking my boy away from me! His mother wants him home!”

  “You hit Drew! So I ain’t your boy!” Shane yells back.

  “In a second,” Axle said blowing past me and in one punch sends the cop sailing into the brick. My God, he was impressive. What I wouldn’t give to be able to hit like that. I was so horny right now…

  “Now,” he says coming to stand in front of me. “I’ll take him out back and let you finish up in here.”

  “Thanks,” I smirk and carefully release Shane. Shane who looked down at his dad like he was a complete stranger. A stranger he could not imagine would ever harm a woman. “I’ll handle this,” I promise him. “Now go.”

  “Drew,” he grates out in defeat.

  “You have to trust me, Shane. Go with Axle, please.”

  When the door clicked, I grabbed Woody and stood over Officer Willis. “Come here again and the video you just starred in will be sent to your captain and every news station in Michigan. Touch him again and the same rule applies but with blood. Your blood. He’s an adult, he’s made his choice which means I’m giving you one. Stay the fuck away from me and mine or, I’ll make your life a living hell.”

  “This ain’t over,” he promises struggling to get to his feet. “I have to bring my boy home no matter what.”