A minute? Was that all it would take to fire her? Closing the door behind him, he met Emma’s disgruntled gaze and pressed a finger to his lips.
Her frown deepened.
He motioned to a doorway in the wall opposite the one he’d just exited.
Emma jumped when a hand touched her arm.
Kate. Her face was no longer devoid of emotion. Now her lips curled up in a faint smile as she nodded that it would be okay.
Her mind blanking, Emma crossed to the doorway and headed inside… an executive bathroom? Really? She glanced around, taking in the double sinks with high-end fixtures, the beautiful tile, the modern toilet, a shower big enough for four, and what appeared to be a closet full of clothes.
What the hell?
She turned around.
Kate and Mr. Reordon entered and closed the door behind them.
“Thank you for coming, Emma,” Mr. Reordon said. “I know this is an unorthodox meeting place, but I needed to speak with you in a room that was soundproof. I asked Kate to join us in hopes that her presence would make you feel more comfortable.”
It didn’t. “Speak to me about what?”
“Cliff,” Kate said.
Emma’s gaze bounced back and forth between them like a Ping-Pong ball. “Cliff in Accounting?”
Mr. Reordon’s lips twitched. “No. Cliff the vampire. We know you’ve been seeing him.”
How? She knew damn well Cliff hadn’t told him. So how else could he have figured it out, unless…? Her eyes widened. “Did you bug my house?” she asked, appalled. But it wasn’t out of the realm of possibility considering he LoJacked all employee cars so he could track them in case of emergency and was notoriously paranoid.
“No,” he answered. “We found the unauthorized cell phone in his apartment.”
Anger rose. They had searched Cliff’s apartment? That was bullshit! The vampires were supposed to have complete privacy in their rooms.
“It isn’t what you think,” he hastened to add. “One of the employees who delivers Cliff’s groceries found it by accident. She noticed a box of graham crackers in his cabinet that had expired and replaced it with a new one. When she dumped the crackers out so she could recycle the box, she found a cell phone hidden beneath them.”
Kate nodded. “She brought the phone to me because she didn’t know what to do about it. As soon as I turned it on, I recognized you. Your picture is on the lock screen.”
“And I had one of my tech guys hack the passcode,” Mr. Reordon admitted.
Emma again opened her mouth to protest.
“I had to do it, Emma,” he said. “I don’t like having to do that shit, but I needed to make sure he wasn’t leaking information about vampires, immortals, and gifted ones to outside sources or contacting his family.”
“His family thinks he’s dead,” she reminded him.
“Which is why I needed to know if he’s been contacting them.”
“He hasn’t.”
“I know,” he said calmly. “I know that now. It’s all good. We put the phone and the graham crackers back before Cliff noticed they were missing.”
Oddly, Mr. Reordon didn’t seem upset with her. Rather, he and Kate both seemed to want to put her at ease. “How long have you known?”
“Almost a year.”
She stared at him in surprise. He’d known about them for a year and hadn’t done anything? Hadn’t intervened? Hadn’t tried to stop them from seeing each other?
She shifted her weight from one foot to the other as she studied them. “Why exactly am I here? Why tell me this now?”
Again, Kate touched her arm. “It’s Cliff,” she said gently, regret entering her pretty features.
Trepidation gripped Emma. “What about him?” Reordon looked grim as hell. “Has something happened?” His absence last night now worried her even more. Had he—?
“There was an incident,” Reordon said, his voice so gentle it actually increased her alarm.
The last time there had been “an incident” that produced such grave expressions, the guards had wanted to shove Cliff out into the sunlight. “Did you kill him?” she blurted, terror rising.
“No!” they practically shouted, expressions horrified.
“No,” Reordon repeated, softer this time. “But it left him agitated. And Aidan couldn’t take him out into the sunlight today. Bastien and Melanie were called away to a meeting, so Bastien had to postpone tonight’s hunt, and…”
“He’s struggling,” Kate said.
Reordon nodded. “Linda is with Alleck in Puerto Rico, consulting a virologist there. And none of the other physicians feel comfortable getting close enough to Cliff to sedate him.”
“Why the hell not? He isn’t a monster. He’s a good man.”
“I know that,” Reordon said and motioned to Kate. “We know that. But Cliff injured a lot of guards the day he went after Whetsman and scared some of the other employees.”
“He also saved a lot of lives the morning the mercenaries attacked,” Emma pointed out. “He saved my life.”
“We’re aware of that and—” Reordon drew his hand through the air in a slicing motion, as if he wanted to cut off that line of conversation. “Look, I can’t make everyone who works for me see what I do in Cliff. And we don’t have time to talk about shit I can’t change. Cliff is struggling, Emma. I’m worried that if we don’t do something soon, he’s going to have another break. I don’t know how to dose him with the sedative, and I don’t want to shoot him with a tranq gun. I also would prefer not to call Seth if possible or draw his attention by delaying or interrupting the meeting so Melanie can return and sedate him, because…” He glanced at Kate. “Well, all things considered… I’m a little worried Seth’s sudden appearance might just agitate him more.”
“Where is he?” she asked. “I can calm him. Let me see him.”
“That’s what I was hoping you’d say. He’s in my boardroom. It’s soundproofed like this bathroom. I didn’t want the other vampires to hear us talking and find out you two are seeing each other, because they’d all start bitching about not having girlfriends of their own.”
Kate nodded. “And we didn’t want to open the boardroom door and just shove you inside without any warning.”
“Consider me warned.”
Reordon reached for the doorknob.
“Wait,” she said.
He paused.
“Will you be going in there with me?”
He glanced at Kate, then back at Emma. “Do you want me to?”
She hesitated. When Cliff would erupt in rage at her home, she’d usually try to say something that would make him laugh and defuse the moment. But sometimes the only way to reach him and dampen the voices was to distract him with sex. Which she did not want to tell them. “No.”
Reordon nodded. “Okay. I’ve shut off all sound going into the boardroom and can’t hear anything that takes place inside it.” He glanced at his watch. “I’m running late and need to head to the meeting. But Kate will remain in my office until I return. If you need anything, you’ll have to open the door to tell her. Are you okay with that?”
“Yes. That’s fine.” If she failed to reach Cliff, she’d just call Aidan and damn the consequences.
“Do you want a tranq gun?”
“No. I won’t need it. Cliff would never hurt me.”
“Understood.” Opening the door, he led them back into his office.
He and Kate stopped at his desk.
Emma kept going, anxious to get to Cliff and try to calm him. Without even pausing, she opened the door, entered, and found herself in a large, very swanky boardroom. She closed the door, sealing herself inside.
The instant, complete lack of sound was a bit disconcerting as she took in the long, gleaming wood table and the twenty-five or thirty upscale chairs pulled up to it. At the far end of the room, looking oddly out of place, a sofa long enough for even Seth to stretch out
on butted up against the wall.
Cliff sat on it, his head in his hands, his fingers tugging on his dreadlocks as his knee bounced up and down.
“Cliff,” she said softly.
His head jerked up. The amber glow in his eyes flashed brighter as he rose. “Emma?”
Nodding, she slowly approached him.
Cliff stared at her as though he were seeing a ghost. His Adam’s apple bobbed in a swallow. “Are you here?” he asked, voice hoarse. “Or am I hallucinating?”
The backs of her eyes began to burn with tears she refused to let fall. “I’m here, honey.” As soon as she reached him, she rested a hand on his chest so he could feel that she was real.
He instantly covered it with one of his own, clasping it tightly but careful not to hurt her. His gaze shifted to the door.
“Mr. Reordon knows about us.”
Fury twisted his handsome features. “Did he threaten you?” he demanded in a very un-Cliff-like voice that sent a chill down her spine.
“No, honey,” she assured him, keeping her voice soft and calm. “He’s known for a long time and is fine with us seeing each other. He just noticed you were struggling tonight and thought I could help.”
He searched her face a long moment.
“Come here.” Stepping close, she slid an arm around his waist. “I didn’t see you last night and need you to hold me so I know you’re okay.”
A long breath soughed out of him as he released her hand and wrapped both arms around her in a tight hug.
Emma held him close as he rested his cheek on her hair. Long minutes passed. “Did something happen?” she asked tentatively.
He nodded. “I tried to kill Seth yesterday.”
Shock seized her. “What?”
“I tried to kill Seth. Or someone I thought was Seth. Or both.”
“Seth—the leader of the Immortal Guardians—Seth?” she asked, trying and failing to keep the alarm out of her voice. No wonder Mr. Reordon had thought Seth’s appearance would increase Cliff’s anxiety.
“Yes.” Sighing, he loosened his hold enough to place a little space between them. He looked so damned weary and pained it broke her heart.
Instead of bombarding him with the many questions that desperately want to pour forth, she sought a response he wouldn’t expect. She’d learned early on that catching him off guard, particularly with something he might find amusing, could sometimes diminish the voices.
Arching a brow, she cast him an admiring look that caressed his muscled body from his head to his boots and back up again. “Damn,” she said, infusing her voice with awe. “That was ballsy.”
A startled chuckle escaped him, chasing away some of the darkness.
“How’d he respond?”
A wry smile lingered on his lips as Cliff took her hands. “The bad Seth? He cut me and hurled me into a tree. I broke several bones.”
She scowled. “What a total asshole!” she blurted, outraged on his behalf.
That drew a full-fledged laugh out of him, pleasing her despite her concern for him. “Yeah. He’s an asshole all right.”
Squeezing his hands, she sat on the comfy sofa and tugged him down next to her. “Tell me everything.”
A little bit of the tension in his rigid form eased as he wrapped an arm around her and tucked her up against his side.
It was a fantastical tale. An ancient immortal by the name of Gershom who apparently was determined to launch freaking Armageddon had posed as Seth—so well he could pass for his twin—and attacked Aidan. What the hell?
“Did you attack the asshole before or after you found out he wasn’t Seth?”
“Before. Then I attacked the real Seth when the fake one fled.”
“Well, you’re just all kinds of ballsy, aren’t you?”
He shook his head as he toyed with her hand, one knee bobbing up and down again. “I didn’t really see him. Either one of them. I just knew someone was trying to hurt Aidan and… lost it.”
“How did the real Seth react?”
He looked down, his chin nearly touching his chest. “With kindness I didn’t deserve,” he murmured.
Biting her lip, Emma cupped his stubbled jaw in her free hand. “You know that’s bullshit, right?”
Turning his head, he buried his lips in her palm and said nothing.
“Cliff?”
Still nothing. Just his lips in her palm and his knee bobbing up and down.
“Look at me, honey,” she ordered gently.
For a moment, she thought he wouldn’t. Then he regarded her with a now familiar, haunted look in his luminescent eyes. The one that told her he feared he was the monster he’d been trying so hard not to become.
“Do you remember me telling you that sometimes you wear blinders? That you’re so focused on the bad that the good eludes you?”
He nodded reluctantly.
“Well, that’s what you’re doing right now. You’re wearing those damn blinders again. You’re so focused on the fact that you attacked Seth that you don’t seem to realize you played an integral role in helping Aidan, Ethan, and Heather keep this Gershom asshole busy until Seth and Zach could arrive. You did exactly what you intended, honey. You kept the bad guy from killing Aidan. You leaped in and had his back before anyone else did.” She shook her head. “Don’t you think Seth appreciates that?”
Rising, he strode away from her. “Aidan, Ethan, and Heather could’ve handled Gershom without me. I was a hindrance.”
Emma stood. “Again, I call bullshit on that, honey. Because Ethan and Heather didn’t jump in to defend Aidan until they were absolutely sure the asshole he fought wasn’t Seth. If you hadn’t helped in their stead, who knows what might have happened? For all you know, he might’ve gutted Aidan.”
Upon reaching the far end of the room, he swiveled and started back. A low growl rumbled in his throat as he shook his head the way he did when he was arguing with himself… or with the voices. When he was a few feet away, he spun and headed back to the far end of the conference room again, reminding her of a caged panther. His hands curled into fists as he muttered to himself. The veins in his arms stood out as the muscles beneath them flexed. “I need to hunt,” he rasped.
“I know. But Bastien and Aidan are both at a meeting. So it might be a little while.”
He swore. “Ask Melanie to sedate me.”
“She went to the meeting with Bastien.”
He shook his head, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. “Right. She and Bastien left together. Have Linda do it.”
“Mr. Reordon said Linda’s in Puerto Rico.”
Again he swore. “Then shoot me with a damn tranq gun,” he ordered, voice rising with frustration.
Hell no. And she didn’t want anyone else to shoot him either. The voices in his head wouldn’t perceive that as anything less than an attack. How would that calm him? “I’d much rather you work off some steam with me.” When he strode back toward her, she smiled, motioned to the sofa, and waggled her eyebrows. “This is big enough for two, you know.”
He paced away again. “No.”
Stubborn man. He knew it would help. It always did. But he was so afraid of hurting her… “Cliff—”
He rounded on her furiously. “I said no! I don’t want you to feel like you have to fuck me every time I start to lose it!”
He might as well have slapped her. Emma straightened, lips tightening. It was the first time he had ever directed his anger at her. “Well maybe this isn’t just about you,” she bit out. “Maybe Mr. Reordon scared the shit out of me when he called me into his fancy office bathroom, told me he knew about us, then somberly informed me that there had been an incident. Maybe I thought he was going to tell me you’d had another psychotic break and that this time the guards had killed you.” Tears welled in her eyes despite her efforts to keep them at bay. “And maybe I wasn’t just offering to fuck you into a better frame of mind. Maybe I needed you
to hold me because for a minute I thought I’d lost you and—”
He crossed the room so quickly he blurred. His arms banded around her as he crushed her to him. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m sorry, Emma. I’m sorry.”
She squeezed him tight, sorry too for her outburst. None of this was his fault. He would never have lashed out if the damned voices weren’t bellowing who-knows-what at him. But she was too choked up to speak.
She didn’t want to lose him.
She just didn’t want to lose him.
And if he tried to shut her out now, if he tried to distance himself from her out of some misguided belief that he was somehow sparing her…
Framing her face with his hands, he pressed fervent kisses to her forehead, her cheeks, and her lips. “I’m sorry,” he whispered again. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean it. I just…”
“I know,” she choked out. “And I’m sorry, too.” She fisted his shirt as she met his bright amber eyes. “It really did scare me. I didn’t see you last night. And that usually only happens when you have a break. Then Mr. Reordon and Kate looked so damn grim when they faced me…”
“It’s okay.” He kissed her. “I’m okay.” Sliding his arms around her, he kissed her again, deepening the contact as his hands began to explore her back with heated caresses. “You said I saved the day, remember?” he murmured in a way that suggested he was trying to convince himself it was true. “You said I did good.” He trailed his lips down her neck in a series of fervent kisses, then drew her up onto her toes and pressed her hips to his, letting her feel how hard he was.
She moaned, clutching fistfuls of his hair as desperation turned to desire.
“I held off the bad guy,” he murmured, tugging her blazer off and letting it drop to the floor. “I’m okay.” His fingers went to work, deftly unfastening the buttons on her shirt.
“You’re okay,” she agreed breathlessly as flames danced through her. She needed him so much. As much as he needed her.
She couldn’t lose him.
How could she ever survive losing him?
Their clothing hit the floor. Then they came together on the sofa, remorse and a longing for reassurance driving them. Their time together suddenly seemed alarmingly short, on the brink of ending. And the fear and despair that spawned made their lovemaking all the more intense as they found ecstasy together.
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