“That was mistake number one... Some years passed and I moved away, came up north to Maryland. Then my mother had a stroke and I went back down to Atlanta to my parents. A lot was the same but some things were different. Mickel was larger than ever! His empire ran the entire city and as soon as I stepped foot in his state, honey he knew. He was knocking on my door the very next day. He told me how he never should have let me go, he was never with Emerald. He adored his daughter, Jayde… but Emerald was too possessive. I was the one for him. And I believed him. We fell in love again and that’s when it started…”
“What started?” Tatum asked quickly, feeling like she was in a soap opera, watching it all up close and personal.
“Well first, it was just phone calls. Emerald felt that I took her family away from her, you know. Then it was flattened tires, busted windows. Mickel even beat her a few times but she kept at it. Then the baby. He would bring Jayde over and she was a child by then, and I wasn’t all the way comfortable with it but I tried to make the best out of everything. But the child was not…normal. I would wake up and she’d be standing next to our bed, just staring at me. Those green eyes piercing me through the dark. When I would ask what she was doing, Mickel would wake and she’d change instantly, saying she had a bad dream, could they go call her mom? That’s when I knew she was manipulative. Then I got pregnant, and everything spiraled out of control. I mean, it all happened so fast… First, Mickel was being indicted and there was a secret government witness. I told Mickel it was Emerald’s doing but he didn’t want to believe me. But I knew she would go through great lengths to know my child grew up without Mickel just like hers. Then one day someone snatched me off of the street, I was three months pregnant. They told me they’d kill me if I didn’t tell Mickel that he wasn’t the father of my child, end our relationship. To tell the truth, I was tired of dealing with Emerald and I knew Mickel would most likely be going to jail for a long time. My father was pressuring me to get away from him before I wound up dead and my baby as well, and I would have done anything for my child. So I ended it with Mickel. I told him I had met a man in Maryland when I moved and was still seeing him when we got back together. I told him that man was the father of my baby. The truth was I had met a man in Maryland, and he was Bill, my husband. But when I went home and got back together with Mickel I ended it with him. But when I left Mickel, Bill was willing to take me back, pregnant and all.”
“Just like Mike did with Sasha,” Tatum noted. Terri laughed.
“Yes, but Bill’s a little better than Mike. And more sane. The thing is though, I knew Sasha was making the wrong choice then just like I had.”
Tatum squinted at her.
“You think you made the wrong choice?”
Terri sighed.
“I don’t know. I mean, I guess you figured it out that baby was Sasha and she was raised as Bill’s. After my father got sick, we ended up moving to Atlanta and I was so scared I would run into Mickel and he would see his features in Sasha. But unfortunately, one day I picked up the paper and saw that he was dead, someone blew up his boat while he and a woman were on it. Everyone knew it was Emerald. Apparently she went crazy when she found out he fathered another child, a little boy, Julez. Not too long after, Emerald was sent away to a psychiatric hospital up in East Orange, NJ.”
“Greystone?” Tatum questioned peculiarly.
“Probably.”
“That’s where Neli was,” Tatum gasped. “Do you think Emerald is still there?”
“Oh, Tatum I don’t know. But I did hear that she was miserable there. And now that I know everything, after a long talk with a friend, I know that she was put there as an alternative. Mickel made a promise to Jayde he wouldn’t kill her when he found out about the boat and he used the situation to his advantage since he was being indicted, but he did force Jayde to sign her mother away or she would be murdered. That’s why he sent her so far away. I don’t know how Jayde forgave him for that but I know she was upset. To tell you the truth, to this day I don’t know if Jayde is actually Mickel’s.”
Terri stirred her cold tea.
“Anyway, I cried for months after I learned of Mickel’s death. And just when I was getting back to normal, my little girl makes friends with Jayde Dupree.” Terri laughed at that. “I thought maybe Jayde was too little to remember, she was being raised by Emerald’s sister at that time, the woman that Sasha and many others believe is Jayde’s mother. I even thought that maybe she believed that Sasha in fact really wasn’t Mickel’s and I was simply an old friend of her dad’s, but one day she came over when she was a teenager and she laid it out. She told me she knew everything, she told me that she knew I lied and that Emerald had sent the man to kill me if I didn’t end it with her father. She claimed she knew her mother was ill and that she didn’t blame me. She would keep the secret with me. She knew about Mickel’s other children too. But something in her eyes still let me know the girl is not 100% genuine. We moved to Jersey shortly after, wanted to start over.”
“Does Sasha know?” Tatum asked curiously.
“She does now. She’s still very upset at me about it and upset that Jayde knew…”
“Jayde,” Terri chuckled to herself repeating her name. “You know I thought she was left back in my past.” Terri then stared at Tatum seriously.
“But somehow this woman has weaved her way into your life now, and into your home. And so much has happened since then.”
Tatum leaned back and held Terri’s eye contact.
She never trusted Jayde, she wasn’t that dumb. But Jayde was the link between Ree and a billion dollars, so they tolerated her. But what could she have really done? Tatum thought. Besides maybe reveal the truth about Chris on purpose. So what? Ree had done it; Jayde hadn’t killed Tatum’s brother, he had.
“She won’t be there long,” Tatum spoke matter of factly.
“Well correct me if I’m wrong, but you’re sounding like a woman that’s still claiming that house…and that man,” Terri smirked.
Tatum ran her hands over her face and screamed.
“Ughhhh! Ms. Terri! I don’t know what to do.” The good thing was all of this madness had snapped Tatum out of her trance with losing her babies. She was wide awake now.
Terri shrugged, standing up and leaning against the couch.
“Follow your heart. I wish I had. Very rarely do you get a third chance Tatum, but I did. So that’s what I’m going to do. Follow my heart wherever it leads me. That’s why I said you can stay as long as you want. Because in a few days, I will not be here.” Terri smiled wide and Tatum dropped her mouth thinking on it heavily.
Was she serious?
“No…!”
Terri nodded quickly.
“Oh yes! Tatum listen to me,” she smiled giddy like a schoolgirl and she came hurriedly to Tatum, taking Tatum’s hands into her own. “Only one man will ever make your heart dance and your head light and your feet lift… and every girl in the world won’t get to experience it, I promise you! Most of these people are settling with people they have grown to love. But if you love someone as soon as you lay eyes on them and they make your life feel like a 24 hour fantasy ride, you don’t let that go. Don’t! Just think about it. But in the meantime and excuse my French…get that bitch out of your house!”
They both laughed at that and Tatum reflected on what she said. Terri shook her head.
“If that girl was raised by Emerald, I’m telling you…” And Terri left it at that. Tatum took a deep breath with a heavy mind and a lot of info to digest. She felt it was impossible to go back to Ree; her brother would turn over in his grave if she did. How could she look at him every day? But was Terri right, had she been naive to not know, or maybe she always knew? But she couldn’t deal with the certainty of it. But then again, did she want to just walk away? And what about Jayde?
Tatum had a decision to make, and it was the hardest of her entire life. She figured she’d sleep on it.
“Know what I said, was he
at of the moment… But there’s a little truth in between the words we've spoken…
It’s a little late now to fix the heart that’s broken… Please don't ask me where I'm going…
‘Cause I don't know…No I don't know anymore…
It used to feel like Heaven, used to feel like May…
I used to hear those violins playing heart strings like a symphony… Now they've gone away…
Nobody wants to face the truth… But you won’t believe what love can do…
Till it happens to you…
Till it happens to you…”
Sasha’s tears fell softly against her cheeks as Corrine Bailey Rae sung her life. Chauncey was gone, she knew it was for good. And this time hurt worse than any, because it was her own actions taking responsibility.
Sure, he’d messed up…plenty of times. But she had messed up in an ultimate way. She involuntarily thought of an old Chris Rock joke, men lie the most…women tell the biggest lies. Even the details of the joke made Sasha chuckle in disbelief. He had said a man’s lie was like ‘I was at Tony’s house…’ instead of telling where he really was. A woman’s lie was like “It’s your baby…”
He hit that right on the nose.
Sasha glanced up at the rearview mirror and watched Aubrey stare peacefully out of the backseat window. She looked just like him Sasha noted. Those eyes, the sharp nose, there was no doubt to Sasha that she was Chauncey’s. Now if they would have performed a blood test would Sasha have sweated a little, sure. She knew she had slept with Bleek. She watched Maury, she knew anything was possible.
“Mommy, why are we slowing down? Those cars behind us are getting mad.”
Sasha gasped as she focused on the gas needle.
Fuck! They had ridden the entire 95 and were now at the lower exits of the NJ Turnpike, and she hadn’t a drop of gas.
“Please…please…please. Please let me make it to the rest stop,” she pleaded on the brink of tears.
But she knew it was useless, the car was doing less than 20 miles per hour now, and the pedal was floored.
Cars began to honk at her aggressively as she switched lanes to the shoulder with cloudy vision, almost colliding with a tractor trailer. This would just add onto her already building aggravation.
Sasha didn’t even know what she was doing. She was so used to running home when anything happened that she had packed up her and Aubrey’s stuff and jumped in her Benz before even calling.
When she finally did, her mother informed her that her father had moved out and surprisingly Tatum was there. Although Sasha wanted to see Tatum, she didn’t want to see her mother. For some reason she couldn’t forgive her mother for the lies she told, even though her father told the same ones and had raised her knowing she wasn’t his. Maybe it was because her mother added more insult to injury by now telling Sasha she was going to “follow her heart”. Sasha knew what that meant, and she felt for her dad. She had found out that low and behold, Mickel was around and he had even been at Tatum’s wedding. So she knew her mother was going to be the same old, selfish Terri, and only think of herself. Sasha wanted to go be with her father to console him.
She talked with Tatum a bit and made her promise they would link up when Sasha arrived in Highland Park. They both had lots to fill the other in on. She wondered how Tatum would react when she found out that she had kept the secret of Bleek hidden from her as well. Her car putt-putting to a complete stop just as she reached the shoulder broke those thoughts.
“Oh my goddd,” she groaned, taking out her phone and trying not to panic in front of Aubrey. She didn’t even have Triple A. Who needed Triple A when she had Chauncey or Bleek always around to come to her rescue? Just like typical Sasha, she relied on others to handle things like that for her.
The minute Sasha went to scroll the internet for a tow truck company nearby, the dashed circle began moving on her screen alerting her that it wouldn’t be going down. Her Iphone powered off, dead and finished.
“Shit!”
“Ooohhh,” Aubrey cooed, kicking her legs and smiling. She always got excited when Sasha said a bad word, she thought it was highly entertaining.
“Aubrey, please.”
“Call daddy,” Aubrey stated calmly.
Sasha sighed and then smiled through her fret at her baby.
“We can’t baby. Daddy went away to school, remember?”
Aubrey poked her lip out, remembering. Her daddy was back in school, the same school he was in through the first stages of her young life.
“I we-mem-ber,” she mumbled sadly, placing her head against the window. She was sad and sleepy.
Sasha reached in the glove compartment for her car charger but to her dismay, it was not there.
“This cannot be happeninggg to meee!”
“It’s okay, Mommy,” Aubrey assured, about to prepare for a nap.
Sasha jumped out of the car, almost having her door knocked off the hinges by speeding traffic. She calmed a bit before she ended up killing herself and she walked close to the car, heading to the trunk.
“If it’s not in the car, it has to be in one of the suitcases. Has to be,” she spoke to herself. The sun was beginning to set and she knew she didn’t have much time left of daylight. Cursing herself for always being irresponsible, she tossed clothes around, digging and searching for something she had a feeling wasn’t even there.
“What the fuck! Where is it?” Even as she demanded the answer from herself, she was almost positive it was left in the Jaguar when she had driven it home the other night. The night when it all went down. The night that changed her life.
Just thinking about it and about her current plight brought tears to her eyes and this time, she didn’t fight them. She let them pour freely as she continued to throw clothes.
“Why can’t anything be where it’s supposed to! Why do you see something over and over again when you don’t need it and when you need it, you can’t find that shit! And why is it my fault, huh? You cheated too! You lied! I hate you! I hate you!” She broke down sobbing coming to the reality that Chauncey will probably be in prison for the rest of his life. “Why did you leave me!” She screamed, throwing a pair of jeans and a silk Miss Sixty top to the back of the trunk. “Why!”
“Are you okay, ma’am?”
Sasha spun around quickly and spotted a large white man, fairly young, with a trucker’s hat and steel toe boots looking at her sincerely.
“I’m…I’m fine. Thank you.” She wiped her face and sniffled, clearing her throat. “I…I ran out of gas.”
He looked her up and down, looked at the scattered clothes in the trunk and could tell she was heading somewhere, or leaving somewhere else.
“I’m sorry to hear that. You wanna ride to the gas station?”
Sasha thought for a second. Did she want to take her baby into a strange man’s pick up on the brink of dusk? But what if no one else stopped? He did seem nice, but shoot nowadays you never know.
“Do you have a phone that I can use? So I can call a tow truck?”
A few cars passed quickly, the noise causing her to have to scream over it a bit.
The man stood stagnated for a moment blank expression and all, and then a smile appeared out of nowhere.
“Well, gosh dolly I sure do. Just follow me over to my truck, it’s just right here. Call whoever you need.”
TTW 3 ( Thicker Than Water 3 ) Page 29
