Fusion

by Rose, Imogen

  Ali’s cell phone interrupted my thoughts. She glanced at her caller ID and gestured that she had to take the call. “Hey! Thought you were coming over for breakfast.”

  I couldn’t make out who Ali was talking to, probably her boyfriend Robert, so I turned around to talk to Maria. However, she watched Ali intently and mouthed something to her.

  “Come around now. We’re still here.”

  “Who was that?” I asked when she got off the phone.

  “Oh, just Ariele. She was supposed to come to breakfast but had to go to lacrosse practice. She’ll be here in ten.”

  “Why?” I barely knew the girl.

  Ali raised her brow. “Whatcha mean?”

  “I guess I don’t feel like hanging out with a stranger at the moment. What are we doing with her? I don’t know anything about lacrosse.”

  “You don’t remember her at all?” Maria asked.

  “Nope.”

  “Well, she is one of your best friends. Or was. The four of us hung around a lot last year. That’s until she hooked up with Ingrid, but we still see each other a lot. We went to New York with her…”

  “Huh? When?”

  Maria told me about the time we all traveled to New York for Ella’s big audition. She described a club we went to and other fun stuff we did. She said that Ariele and I seemed to know all the best places to visit and that we had a hoot during our visit there. I closed my eyes, trying to visualize myself in New York.

  Memories of Mom, Dad, Ella, Harry, and me skating at the Rockefeller ice rink a few years ago flooded my mind, and I smiled.

  “You remember!” Ali yelped in delight.

  Opening my eyes, I shook my head. “No, sorry. I was just remembering my last trip to Manhattan two years ago. You guys didn’t come, but I had a blast with Harry and Ella.”

  Ali frowned. “Well, maybe it’ll come back to you. We had a lot of fun.”

  “Maybe you can try hypnosis or…” Maria pursed her lips, going silent.

  “Hey? What’s up?” Ali nudged her.

  “What if it wasn’t you? What if your doppelganger was here all of last year?”

  Sheesh, that hadn’t even occurred to me. But what about me in that case? Where had I been? I buried my face in my palms. No. That couldn’t be. “I remember some stuff,” I protested.

  “Like what?” she challenged.

  “Well, it’s not so much that I remember, but I can feel things. Like I can skate. I feel different about Kellan. I knew that the hockey jersey was mine when I put it on… just stuff like that, but still…”

  “That’s nothing. There could be other explanations for that. Do you actually remember anything? The Ball? Getting attacked by Simla in the restroom? Anything?”

  I could feel myself welling up. No. I couldn’t remember anything specific.

  “Stop upsetting her, Maria,” Ali said firmly. “Like I said, you’re here now, and we’ll get to the bottom of this. I think that’s Ariele’s car arriving now. Maria, could you let her in?” She threw Maria a look.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you, Arizona. Sorry. I’ll go get Ariele.”

  She was back moments later with the gorgeous brunette who seemed a bit reserved, her lips drawn into a tight, unnatural smile. “Hey! Sorry I missed breakfast.”

  “Still got some left. Grab a plate.” I got up to get her some juice.

  “Aww, thanks! I’m starving.”

  I walked over to the buffet, filled a plate with pancakes, bacon, and home fries, and handed it to her.

  “Wow, nice!” She broke into a grin before she chomped into the food. “Where’s Gertrude?” she asked as Tallulah came tearing in and jumped on her.

  “She left last night,” I said.

  “Oh! I wanted to say goodbye. So, what have you guys been doing?”

  “Just chatting,” Ali said. “We’re trying to figure out what Arizona remembers from the last year, if anything.”

  “And?”

  “Nothing.”

  Ariele looked up at me in surprise. “Like nothing at all?”

  I shook my head.

  “Our trip to New York?”

  “Nope.”

  She stood up and paced the floor. “And Gertrude didn’t help you remember anything?”

  Since I had no idea who this girl was, I wasn’t about to share what I had told Ali and Maria. I just shook my head. It was kind of true. Whatever Gertrude had shown me was certainly not my memory.

  “Tell her about the girl with brown hair,” Maria prodded.

  I threw her the death glare.

  “What’s that?” Ariele stood at attention.

  “Nothing,” I said, daring Maria to argue.

  “Whatevah.” Maria sighed.

  “Arizona, tell me.” Ariele gently placed her hand on my shoulder.

  She didn’t make me flinch. Her touch felt natural and friendly. When I looked into her eyes, I felt warmth and genuine concern shine through. The girls seemed to trust her, but there didn’t seem to be a reason to share anything with her. It’s not like she really knew me. If we had been friends last year, she only knew that person. And maybe that wasn’t even me, but a doppelganger! “It really isn’t anything.” I kept my tone as light as possible. “Here, let me get you a refill.” I picked up her glass and poured some more juice into it. “So, what do you guys want to do today?”

  Ariele shrugged at Ali and Maria but took the glass from my hands. She clenched her jaw. “What the fuck’s going on, A?” As soon as she said it, she covered her mouth with her hand and stared at me wide eyed. “I’m sorry, it just slipped out,” she whispered through her fingers.

  “A? Who’s that?” I demanded. Did she know something about David’s girlfriend?

  “Ali and Maria don’t know. Are you sure you want me to spill?”

  “Spill what?” I was getting very frustrated. “If you know something about A, just tell us.”

  She took a step back and glared at me. “Sheesh, you don’t even remember who you really are?”

  “I am Arizona Darley!” I shouted angrily.

  She threw her hands up in the air and stormed out.

  Ali rolled her eyes. “What’s with you, Arizona? That was a bit insane. What about the A? She sometimes calls you that, no biggie. Right?”

  I took a moment and then nodded. I needed time to process this. “Guess I’m just tired. I barely slept last night, and all this has me feeling like crap.”

  “I can see that. Still, no excuse for taking it out on Ariele. She’s having a hell of a time dealing with you not remembering her. She’s really cut up about it,” Maria said.

  “Yeah, I’ll apologize.” I felt ashamed. It wasn’t Ariele’s fault that my memory was shot. “What’s her number? I’ll call and ask her to come back.”

  “No, get some sleep first,” Maria suggested. “Call us when you get up, and we’ll come over with Ariele. That sound okay?”

  I yawned, more tired than I’d realized.

  After the girls left, I popped my head into the study. I watched as Kellan tapped away on the Mac, his face bathed in concentration. I didn’t want to disturb him, so I silently enjoyed watching him work.

  When he noticed me, he held out his hand but kept typing, probably hoping to get his thought down before I interrupted his concentration. I took his hand and sat down on his lap, allowing him to keep working while I sifted through some of the papers on the desk—sheet after sheet of scribbled data. I had no idea what to make of it all.

  “What’s all this stuff?” I asked once he stopped typing and leaned back in his chair.

  “Physics project. Due this week. I am almost done with my part.”

  I looked at him blankly.

  “Not to worry.”

  “What’s it about?”

  “Time travel.” He laughed.

  “Keeping it real, I hope, or did you add a para about Wanderers?”

  He chuckled and enveloped me in a hug, kissing my neck gently.

  Kell
an was the only thing about my life that felt completely right. I rested my face on his shoulder, breathing into his neck.

  “Are the girls gone already?” he asked.

  “Yeah.” I grimaced. “I really pissed off Ariele and just felt bleh after that.”

  “How did you piss her off?”

  “I got angry with her and yelled at her after she proclaimed that I didn’t even know who I was. The nerve!”

  He nodded slowly. “I can understand her frustration. You guys were very close, so go easy on her.”

  “That’s what Ali and Maria said as well. It’s just a bit annoying how I’ve got to be all considerate when no one seems to realize how this sucks for me.”

  Kellan squeezed my hand. “That’s not true. We do, and we’re all trying to figure out how to help you. Even if what we try doesn’t work. Like Gertrude, for example. I’m sure David brought her over for a visit so she could help you fill in the blanks.”

  “I guess,” I conceded. “But… what if they aren’t my blanks to fill in? Remember in Vegas, we talked about how I could have a doppelganger in another dimension?”

  “Yeah, though we were just kinda kidding, but sure, we could all have doppelgangers in other dimensions.”

  “True. But what if my doppelganger came here, to this dimension, and lived here last year pretending to be me? Now that would explain why the heck I can’t remember anything.”

  Kellan gasped, his mouth falling open. “No way!”

  “Wait! Calm down. But if you think about it, it makes sense.”

  “No.” He swept his hair back with his fingers and moved me from his lap, stood up, and paced the floor. He came to a stop right in front of me and gazed into my eyes. He didn’t say anything but looked lost in thought.

  He broke the silence abruptly, spitting out, “What color is your hockey helmet?”

  “Pink, of course,” I said without hesitation.

  He threw his hands up in the air and smiled with satisfaction, then he brushed my lips with his and kissed me for a long intense moment. He let go of me and took my hand. “That was no doppelganger. It was you.”

  I nodded. I didn’t understand how, but deep within me, I knew that I had been here—with Kellan. I had played hockey. My body told me so. “I may still have a doppelganger, though. In fact, I think I might have spoken to her.”

  “What? How?” Kellan’s eyes narrowed.

  I told him about the phone call when I had been hiding out with David.

  “That’s a bit of a long shot.” He sounded unconvinced. “A could be anyone. Annabel, Alicia, Allirea, Anne-Marie…”

  “There’s more,” I said before he recited the whole list of names starting with the first letter of the alphabet. I told him about the memory Gertrude had revealed. The first one—there was no way I was sharing the other one with Kellan. Especially after the way he reacted when I told him about the kiss at the rink. His fists clenched into tight balls, and a red hue washed over him.

  “Brown hair!” I repeated loudly. “It wasn’t me!” I tugged at my blond strands.

  When it was clear that I wasn’t getting through to him—his anger so intense that he’d frozen up—I walked over and touched his shoulder. He flinched, stepping back.

  “Kell! It wasn’t me! Can’t you see that?”

  He didn’t respond, turning away from me and sitting down. I walked around so that I was face-to-face with him again.

  “Kell!” I snarled. “That wasn’t me kissing David. I think it was my doppelganger. Can’t you see how it all fits?”

  His tone was cold but steady when he finally spoke. “You say that you don’t remember anything, so how can you be sure it wasn’t you?”

  “I just know. Same way you say you know that I am the same girl you knew last year.”

  He looked unsure, but the anger seemed to subside. “We should talk to Ariele.”

  I scrunched my nose at him. “Why?”

  “Ariele knew you from the other dimension. It’s possible that she actually knew this doppelganger we’re hypothesizing about.” He shook his head. “It still doesn’t make sense. You are the one who knew how to play hockey and claimed to be from the other dimension.”

  “It sort of does make sense if Gertrude is the doppelganger’s dog.”

  “Hmm. I think I can see where you’re coming from, but it’s totally blowing my mind. You’re actually thinking that David’s going out with her? With your double? That’s bizarre. Why wouldn’t he have told me?”

  I shrugged.

  “Do you mind if I call Ariele?”

  “No, if you think that’ll help us figure out this mess. Do you trust her?”

  “Yeah, totally.” He picked up his cell and called her while I got us some water from the kitchen. By the time I got back to the study, he was putting his cell back in the pocket of his leather jacket.

  “Thanks.” He took the glass from my hand. “Ariele’s at her house. She told us to head on over. Ready?”

  “Sure, let me just grab my jacket.”

  Sitting on the back of Kellan’s Harley on the way to Ariele’s gave me a chance to think. I wasn’t enthusiastic at all about going to see Ariele, not really getting the point. Instead, we should be spending our time needling David for answers. I’d called him as I was getting my jacket, but it went straight to his voicemail. I’d left him a message and planned to find him as soon as we were done visiting Ariele.

  I closed my eyes, enjoying the cool breeze hitting my face as we sped down the highway. I pictured Ariele, seeing her chestnut hair and clear hazel eyes. I didn’t feel any connection to her at all, either good or bad. At any other time, I would have made an effort to be friends with her. She seemed like a nice person, and Ali and Maria sure liked her. However, at the moment, I didn’t feel I had the energy for new people in my life. I was too busy struggling to figure stuff out. Anyhow, I’d humor Kellan for now.

  I put on my brightest smile as I spotted Ariele waiting for us on her porch when we pulled into her driveway. I better be on my best behavior after our last meeting. She broke into a smile when I waved at her cheerily.

  “Hey, come on in! Mom and Dad are out shopping, so we’re on our own. Do you guys want anything to drink?” She led us into her kitchen.

  “No thanks. I’m good,” I said as Kellan shook his head. I sat down on one of her bar stools, feeling oddly at home even though I had never been there before.

  I didn’t mind when Kellan started telling Ariele about what Gertrude had shown me and then about the phone call. She sat and listened attentively.

  “Interesting, and it sure puts another spin on things. Arizona, I am guessing that you don’t remember the pictures I showed you?”

  I had no idea what she was talking about and shook my head.

  “Hang on.” She got up and rushed off.

  “What’s that all about?” I whispered to Kellan.

  “Wait a sec, and you’ll see.”

  Ariele returned with a handful of photographs. She handed one to me. It was a pic of me standing on the ice with a hockey stick. I had no memory of it. I guessed it must have been from last year. Before I could ask, she handed me another picture. It was the same as the last one, except I had removed my helmet. I gasped. My hair was brown. I looked exactly like the memory Gertrude had shared.

  “Wow.” I looked at both Ariele and Kellan, waiting for an explanation. Instead of saying anything, Ariele handed me the rest of the pile. I looked through the ten or so photographs, getting more and more confused with each one. There were pictures of brown-haired me at Christmas time with Ella, Mom, and a strange man, a few with Ariele and a bunch of other girls and boys at a party, and one of Ariele and me lying on a bed making silly faces at the camera.

  “Who is she?” I asked Ariele. It was clear that she knew. No wonder Kellan had wanted me to talk to her.

  “I thought it was you,” she said. “But now, with what you’re telling me, I guess you have a double.” She looked sad. “So, w
here did she go? She was the one who was here last year, right, Kellan? She had to be. She knew me from New Jersey. Where did you come from?” She looked at me with venom in her eyes.

  I found myself boiling over again and felt Kellan grip my arm.

  “Ariele, this Arizona was here, has been here all the time.”

  “Bullshit,” she said scornfully. “This is the Barbie Arizona who went missing last year, not my friend.”

  “Stop!” he growled. “You’re wrong.”

  “Whatever. Think what you like. I want to know where A has gone.”

  “Is that what you called her?” I asked.

  “Yep,” she said coldly. “I guess your mom zapped her through the Portal once you reappeared. Where did you go when you disappeared last year?”

  “She didn’t.” Kellan’s tone was insistent, but even I had doubts.

  “Well, there is only one way to find out,” she said.

  “Yes, we can ask David about A. He seems to know her,” I said.

  She waved her arm. “Like he’ll tell us anything! Nope. I want to find her myself.”

  “And how are you going to do that?” Kellan asked. “If, and that’s a very big if, there is another Arizona, we have no idea where she could be.”

  “Seems pretty obvious to me,” Ariele retorted. “David’s been hanging out in New Jersey. A is home, and that’s where I’m going.”

  “We already did that,” he said. “Remember? Totally pointless venture.”

  I had no idea what he was talking about, but Ariele replied before I had a chance to ask.

  “I totally agree. She’s not here, in this dimension. A is home in New Jersey in the other dimension. I need to go home through the Portal.”

  Olivia was the first one to arrive at Constance’s house. After hearing that Rupert was stopping by, she’d not been able to concentrate on anything else, so she arranged for Bruno to drive her over early to help Constance get organized. Platters full of colorful canapés now adorned the oversized buffet table in Constance’s family room, which also doubled as her meeting room. They’d worked hard all afternoon getting the little sandwiches and vol-au-vents ready, the dips prepared, and drinks chilled. All there was left to do was wait for the others and then for Rupert. Olivia hoped that he was coming back to debrief them, and that things would then return to normal, but her gut told her that this would probably be a fleeting visit, that Rupe would be gone as suddenly as he would appear. Still, any time with him was better than none, and she hoped that she would get some answers.