“I-I don’t know,” she whispered.
He chuckled. “No reason to be shy, sweetheart. Tell me what you want.”
She stiffened slightly. “I don’t know.”
He froze, lifting his chin. She brought her head up and met his gaze. “Has no man ever…?” She gave him a jerky shake of her head. “How is that possible?”
“I’ve never been with a man before.”
“Avary, what are you saying? Are you a virgin?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, fuck!” He took a step back, pulling his hand from her body. Her juices still moistened his fingers.
“Victor?” Her eyes were dark.
“Avary, I’m not the right man for you,” he muttered.
She reached out and touched his shoulder, her scent an intoxicating fragrance that seeped into him. His adrenaline was so strong, he believed he could have jumped off a high rise and flown.
“You don’t want me?” her soft voice tugged at his veins.
He cupped her cheek, brushing his thumb along the soft skin. “Oh, sweetheart, I want you, but I can’t have you.” He’d almost allowed things to get out of hand. He couldn’t take her innocence.
“Okay,” she said as she slid off the island, pulled up the straps to her gown, but didn’t remove her hand now pressed against his chest. “I understand.” Her cheeks flushed with color.
“Do you?” He lifted a brow.
“I’m not your type,” she whispered.
He groaned. He wanted to deny her words, but they were true. He’d never been with a woman like Avary, never been this close. She was everything he wasn’t. She was like a newborn bird, testing its wings for the first time, gullible and trusting. He was the hawk looking for its next prey. Yet there was something about her that made him see things differently. If he told her the truth, would she be frightened of him? “No, you’re not, sweetheart,” he finally said.
She blinked, then dropped her hands to her sides. Her bottom lip quivered. Had he hurt her? That wasn’t his intention. She wobbled and he started to reach out to steady her, but she brought up a hand, silently telling him not to.
“You should sit for a moment,” he said.
She gave her head a quick shake. “No, I’m fine.” She moved toward the door. There she stopped, looking at him over her shoulder. One spaghetti strap moved down her arm and the top of the gown had dropped low on one pale breast. He might as well have been kicked in the chest because his body ached to touch every part of her.
“Avary…I…” He needed to say something, anything.
What could he say?
CHAPTER FIVE
Avary stood at the door, watching Victor as he grappled with his words. He looked flustered, torn. He wasn’t the same carefully controlled man he was before. This was a new side to him, a vulnerable side and it seemed as if he wasn’t sure how to handle himself in this state. She doubted he’d ever known vulnerability before, at least when it came to a woman. Others probably gave into him, followed his every cue, but Avary was different. She had offered him a gift, which he denied, and she knew she must protect her heart and soul from the dangerous Victor Knight.
She lowered her eyes slightly, not wanting to look into his gaze for fear that he would see her humiliation. She’d wanted him, enough that she would have allowed him to take her here…or in his bedroom, in the middle of the yard, or in a cave if that’s what he’d wanted. But he didn’t want her. He said he did, but then followed up that she wasn’t his type once she told him the truth. The dull knife sunk into her chest. What had she been thinking? Why had she thought there was something between them, a connection? What would a man like Victor Knight want with me?
As he watched her, she wanted to run away, but didn’t want him to see how he’d hurt her.
“Avary?”
“What?” she snapped. Humiliation quickly turned to irritation. She realized she needed to get away fast before her wounded side turned ugly. Her past knocked at the closed door, a time when she felt so alone that she thought she’d never find anyone who could connect with her. Had she truly believed Victor was the one? After hearing that he’d left her the panda, the visitor she called ‘guardian angel’, she’d truly believed she was brought here for a reason.
How foolish could she be?
“Sleep well,” he finally said.
This was all he wanted to say? This was why he looked pale and disoriented? “I hope you do too,” she responded with sarcasm.
She pushed through the door and quickly made her way to her bedroom before her knees gave out completely.
Once inside, she closed and locked the door, pressing her forehead against the hard wood. Unwanted tears filled her eyes and she blinked, but they didn’t disappear. She sank to her bottom and laid her face into her palms. Why would she cry? He’d done her a justice by denying her. After all, they were two different people living in two different worlds. Although she was sure she wasn’t the oldest living virgin, at times it certainly felt like that was the case. Especially when she was lying in bed at night and would hear a faint moan or the creaking of her sister’s bed as Doug made love to her.
Feeling like a creeper listening, she’d gotten used to putting on her ear phones and listening to music on nights that he stayed over. After all, they deserved their privacy and Avary felt she was in the way.
She craved love herself, but that’s not what Victor could have offered. He would have given her one night of non-committal sex—yet, without a doubt, it would have erased all of her anxieties and she would have become a woman.
Could she satisfy a man like Victor?
The tears flowed and she buried her face into her knees. She was crying over something silly, something that never should have happened to begin with. She should never have gone downstairs, knowing the risk of being caught. Maybe that’s what she wanted, secretly wishing that he would find her. No, that wasn’t like her. Ridiculous.
So this was what rejection felt like? Sure, she’d been rejected before, but this was on a whole new level. This rated up there with the time she’d puked on her crush and he’d called her ‘nasty’. But it really wasn’t. In fact, Victor wasn’t her type either and making love would only complicate things. When she finally gave herself to a man, she wanted a gentle, kind lover, yet she had no doubt that Victor would be all of those things and more. The way he’d kissed her, held her, looked at her with such consideration that she could have believed that they were the only two people in the world. She could have fantasized that they were falling in love.
She chuckled and covered her mouth with her palm. Are you listening to yourself?
At twenty-five, she shouldn’t be as naïve as a doe. It was time she started experiencing life, understanding that not everyone had the same emotional makeup as she did. Most people did have non-committal sex, sometimes with more than one person at a time, and just because Victor held her and she’d heard music playing and saw fireworks didn’t mean anything more than that she was horny. Yup, horny. Even virgins had needs.
Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, she stood up and went to the bed. Tomorrow would be a new day. She would get a grip on her emotions. Not let Victor find his way into her mind and heart. She only had to get through tomorrow, and Sunday she would leave this place. And maybe she would actually let Dawn set her up with the doctor from the hospital like her sister had wanted.
The next day, Avary woke early and called her sister.
“Hey, sis, what’s wrong?” Dawn asked.
“Nothing. I just wanted to speak to you.”
“I can tell by the sound of your voice that something isn’t right.”
Avary sighed. Her sister had an exceptional gift. “I was kissed by Victor,” she blurted.
“Uhh…you what?” Her voice vibrated the line.
Avary squeezed the plastic on her cell. “I said, I was kissed by Victor.”
“Okay, let me get this straight. You’re there for one day and you two
are that close? Sheesh, sis. You work pretty fast for a virgin.”
“We didn’t have sex,” Avary added. Should she tell her sister everything?
“But a kiss for you is huge. Yet somehow, I’m not surprised.”
“What do you mean?” Avary sat on the edge of the bed.
“Look at him.” Dawn laughed.
“I just need to get today over with and I’ll be home tomorrow.” She played with a loose string on the comforter.
“You’re that anxious to get back here?”
“Of course,” she said flatly.
“Are you going to be able to keep your lips to yourself?” she teased.
“Yeah…shouldn’t be a problem. He’s not my type, and neither am I his.”
“Oh, you have a type?” She sighed. “And you need to give yourself a little more credit.”
“Come on, Dawn. He’s a powerful man worth a fortune and I’m, well, I used to be a cellist.”
“Used to be? Pull yourself out of these depressing thoughts and remember that you were one of the best, and you can get there again. So what that Victor Knight has money. He’s a man, bleeds and breathes just like we all do.”
“Sis…he’s…ugh…we are worlds apart.” That’s exactly what she’d told herself almost a hundred times since they’d kissed last night.
“Trust me, you’re going to put on that red dress tonight and that world you’re referring to will suddenly become nothing.”
Avary snickered. “I hope I can carry it off.”
“You’ll be a knock out, sweetheart. You’ll have all eyes on you and they won’t even be able to listen to the music.”
“Oh no, you’re going a little hog wild. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”
“I’ve gotta go, babe. My break is over. Love you.”
“Love you, too.” Avary hung up, feeling better.
Her stomach growled and she remembered that just because the place looked like the Four Seasons didn’t mean that she’d be treated like she was a paying guest. She started down the stairs, feeling more confident, when she overheard two voices. One was Victor and the other was a woman with a French accent. They were talking low, but from the angle where Avary stood on the stairs, she was right above where they must be standing in the foyer.
What should I do?
“You know you wanted me last night,” the woman said loudly. “You know you’ll want me again, as always.”
“Selena, don’t make more out of what we shared. Now go home,” Victor told her.
“How about I continue what we started. You always did love when I sucked you,” her soft voice made Avary’s skin crawl. “Let me go down and bring you pleasure. You said no woman could ever give you what you needed like I do.”
Avary waited, holding her breath, torn between knowing she should run back upstairs and wondering what his answer would be.
Footsteps were heard coming from the hall and Avary held her breath, pressing against the wall, hoping she wasn’t seen. Max appeared through a set of double doors. “Sir, you have an important call. Shall I take a message?”
“No, Max. I’ll take it in my office. Selena was just leaving. Will you see her out please?”
“Yes, Mr. Knight,” Max answered.
Avary took a slow step backward, trying to work her way upstairs, but it was too late. Max lifted his chin, appearing surprised. She mouthed, “Please no.”
He didn’t give her away. Victor’s footsteps faded and Max stepped out of view. Avary heard him say, “Let me show you to the door, ma’am.”
“Oh, please, Max. The door is five feet in front of my face! Go make breakfast and leave me alone.” The woman sniffed loudly.
“Once I see that I have shown you out, ma’am.”
Clanks of heels sounded and a second later the door opened, then closed with a loud thud.
Avary made her way downstairs. “Someone didn’t have their coffee.” She tried making light of the situation.
“Avary, may I interest you in breakfast?” he asked. “Cook just prepared eggs, bacon and toast. Or I can have him make you something lighter if you prefer.”
“Yes, Max, eggs are fine, but is it okay if I take it to my room?”
“Mr. Knight has already eaten.”
“I’m sure he has,” she huffed. “I shouldn’t ask, but did she spend the night?”
“Avary, I’m not one to put my nose in Mr. Knight’s business. You should discuss this subject with him?”
She took a step closer to the distinguished man. “Max, please. I’m just asking if she spent the night, not if she slept with Victor.”
“She occupied the guest bedroom, Miss Pine.”
“Thank you for your honesty,” she said.
“I have an idea. Would you mind taking a tray up for Angelina? I think she would love to have your company and maybe you’ll have luck getting her to take a few bites.”
“Isn’t she feeling well?”
“She is calling it pre-party jitters, but I do believe she’s a little under the weather.”
“I’d love to take her a tray.”
Max held out the crook of his arm. “Then let’s go gather it now.”
Avary slipped her hand around his elbow and followed his lead toward the kitchen. “Max, this family is lucky to have you.”
“And if you ask me, I’d say I’m lucky to have them.”
After leaving Angelina’s room so that she could rest, Avary decided to take a walk. Since she wouldn’t be at the vineyard long, she’d hoped to explore the property. She knew once upon a time the vineyard was open to visitors, but currently it was closed to the public, guessing it had something to do with Angelina’s illness.
It had rained earlier that morning and the vineyard glistened in the sunlight. The leaves on the vines were bright green and the grapes big, purple globes.
As she passed by the outer rows, she admired the peace and quiet except for an occasional chirping bird and the revving of a power boat’s motor in the distance. She breathed in the fresh air, catching the strong scent of dirt and growth.
The property was absolutely amazing. For the first time in her life she wished she could paint. Oh what pleasure it would bring to her to replicate the exquisite scenery with watercolors. She could continue on and on, walking the land, looking at the scenery, inhaling fresh country air. Her body relaxed and she could easily forget the inner turmoil she’d been feeling earlier.
She took a seat near a flower garden facing the water and wasn’t sure how long she’d sat there when she’d heard the sound of quickly approaching footsteps. Avary stayed still, wondering who would be coming out here because she hadn’t told anyone where she was going. Then a girl rounded the corner, she couldn’t have been any more than sixteen or seventeen, and she was tucking a white envelope into the front pocket of her skinny jeans. When the girl saw Avary, she stopped and her eyes widened, and then she started giggling. “I didn’t know there was anyone out here.”
“Hi there.” Avary stood, swiping off the back of her jeans. “I’m Avary. I’m, well, staying here for the weekend.” There was no reason to go into detail.
“You’re the musician, right?” The girl tossed her tousled blonde hair over one shoulder. “My dad told me you were staying here.”
There was something about the girl that seemed familiar, her mannerisms. “Your dad?”
“Max. The old guy that wears the expensive suits.” She jutted her chin toward the house.
“Your dad is Max?”
“Uhh, yes.” The girl narrowed her gaze. “I’m Danni. I don’t live here with him. I live with my mom on Yorkshire Drive. I come and visit when I can. And I had to see Mr. Knight too.”
The mention of Victor’s name made Avary’s heart quicken. Why did her body respond so ridiculously? “Are you friends with him?”
She shrugged a skinny shoulder. “Nah, not really. He’s nice and all, and I’ve always come over and helped out with the horses.” She kicked the toe of her
tennis shoe across the grass. “Mr. Knight wrote me a check for college. That was his promise. If I helped out on the weekends and made good grades, he’d pay my way anywhere I wanted to go.”
“That’s fabulous, Danni. Where have you decided to go?”
Her smile told of her excitement. “University of Pennsylvania. Don’t tell Mr. Knight or my dad, but I chose there because that’s where Eugene is going.”
“Eugene?”
“My boyfriend. If I’d told them, they would have both tried to talk me out of it.” She twisted her lips then shrugged. “Well, I gotta go. I have plans.” She gave a quick wave.
Avary watched Danni until she disappeared through a row of trees toward the road. Avary sat there for the longest time, absorbing what she’d just been told. Even if she was angry with Victor, she couldn’t deny that he was generous. Of course, he had the money to be lavish, but he made the choice to do kind things. Her heart swelled. Why was it that just as soon as she came to the conclusion that she didn’t have any feelings for the man, something happened to show her that she most certainly did.
The sun was starting to set and Avary went back to the house, into her suite and turned on the water in the bathtub, pouring in an ample amount of scented bubbles . Once the tub was full, she undressed and climbed in, sliding down into the hot water. Her muscles immediately relaxed and she laid back, closing her eyes. She allowed her body and her mind to soak up the quiet, yet there was a nagging sensation remaining between her thighs.
Moving her fingers through the water, she slipped her hand to her throbbing mound, sliding her fingers along the sensitive curves. Finding the hardened bud tucked behind the silken nest, she touched herself, adjusting the pressure. The only pleasure she’d known was from her own hand, but she craved large fingers, touching her, exploring her. Rolling the pad of her forefinger around her swollen clit, she relaxed her knees, spreading her legs wider for complete enjoyment. The warm water tripled the feeling.
Flames licked at her insides as she fingered her nether lips, her juices flowing, mixing with the water. Her thighs quivered as tingles flooded through her body, release growing closer and stronger. Images of Victor invaded her mind, imagining him here with her, naked and willing to show her what she’d been missing. Slipping her finger through the folds, she slid one inside of her opening, then sinking her finger deeper. She took on a gentle rhythm, then quickened the pace, bringing her hips up to meet each thrust.
Pride & Pleasure (The KNIGHT Brothers Book 1) Page 9
