Parmella put the lap belt snugly under her Sister’s belly and then clipped in the shoulder belt. “Not trying to get fresh here, Surinder, but I want you nice and safe.”
With a relieved sigh, Surinder closed her eyes and fell asleep as soon as the vehicle started moving.
“They look like little angels,” Amanda said looking over her shoulder at her children as they napped in the car, “but you and I both know they can be…”
“Kangaroos!” Dustin said quickly.
“Okay. Very, um, bouncy kangaroos.”
“At least they’re quiet now.” Dustin searched the road ahead. “Where do I turn, Mandy?”
“The info sheet just says ‘back alley access’; wait, is this it?”
Dustin carefully herded the SUV down the dirt road. After a particular jarring bump; two strident voices from the back seat asked “Are we there yet?”
“The jury is still out, “Dustin answered.
“What’s a jury?” Sasha asked.
“That’s when you tell a lie,” Maisy said smugly.
“No dear, you’re thinking of the word perjury; close though,” their Mom answered.
Dustin stepped on the brake. “I think the Realtor may have committed some form of perjury. I don’t see the ‘spectacular ocean view’.
The little family got out of their vehicle and leaned against it.
“Maybe we should go cut down the trees and see if the ocean is there?” Maisy suggested.
“Oh you clever girl!” Amanda exclaimed. “That’s it; there must have been quite a view, well, about twenty years ago. And, no, Maisy, we can’t cut down the trees. They’re in the neighbor’s yard.”
Maisy looked down and kicked a rock, sending up a puff of dust. “They should go to jail,” she said.
“You can’t put the trees in jail!”
Dustin gave Sasha a quick hug. “We’re not going to put the trees in jail. I think what your Sister means, is the Realtor should go to jail for false advertising.”
Sasha crossed her arms and burped, “Rip-off, rip-off!”
Maisy looked at her Sister, and crossed her arms too. “Let’s just get out of here Mom & Dad. I don’t even want to look in the house.”
Dustin and Amanda looked at one another and nodded. As they were all about to climb back in their vehicle, a tall woman came down the alley and waved at them with her phone.
“They’re not home! They go south, in the summer, of all things. Did you take a wrong turn, or are you looking to buy the place?” she asked.
“Probably both,” said Amanda. “We were looking for a place to buy…but now that we’ve seen the outside, we feel like we took a wrong turn.”
Maisy sighed dramatically. “The ocean is missing!” she said.
Sasha grew shy and just added a small ‘moo’ for good measure.
“I’m Merry Peters. I own the home on the road back there. Are you looking to buy in this area in particular? I ask, because the kids would have quite the bus ride to the nearest school.”
Maisy nudged Sasha. “And cows are not allowed to ride the bus, you know, so you won’t be able to go to school and you will be the dumbest cow ever!”
“Will not!”
“Will too!”
Amanda gave the twins her best Mom look and they surprisingly quit bickering. “Amanda and Dustin Sinclair. We were actually looking at a home yesterday in the old town site, but it was too small for our growing family.”
Dustin frowned and a flash of confusion went across his face, until it was replaced with a huge grin.
“There were flowers,” Sasha said sadly. “They were selling them. In a shop. Where people sell flowers,” Sasha explained. She looked at her shoes. “I will never be happy again.”
Amanda and Dustin tried their best not to smile.
Maisy gently patted her Sister on her back. “You can still be a cow,” she said encouragingly.
Merry Peters put her hand over her mouth and said wondrously, “Well feed me garlic, throw me down and call me stinky!”
Sasha stopped looking at her shoes, smiled, and started looking around for garlic.
The tall lady waved her phone again. “I just got a very disturbing, very weird phone call. I have a business out in the old town site that I’ve been thinking about selling for some time. You wouldn’t know anyone who wants to buy my Flower Shop, would you?”
Chapter Ten:
Or Miss Twinkle and the Fierce Food Café
When Jorja lay on the couch, Miss Stein left her sleeping kittens and ran over and jumped on Jorja’s back. Malcolm sat on the floor in front of Jorja and could barely feel the gentle tap Miss Stein gave him with her paw.
“I don’t know if she’s seen anyone with a bald head before,” Crawford said.
Jorja ran her hand over Malcolm’s head. “You have stubble!” she said. “Does that mean you can grow your hair?”
“I don’t know. When I started getting phone calls from angry customers, my hair started falling out in huge clumps. I thought I had alopecia and just shaved it all off.”
Malcolm had filled in Jenny and Crawford about his cousin Steve while they ate chocolate pudding for brunch.
“I also wanted to put some distance between me and my image on the cards that Steve had plastered all over town. “ Malcolm scratched his head. “Then shaving my head just became a habit.” He turned to Jorja. “I could try growing it if you like?”
“Okay!” Jorja said so enthusiastically that Miss Stein arched her back, gave a sneeze and left for a less excitable area to nap.
“I’ll grow mine too,” said Jorja. She looked at her Mom and Dad sitting on the loveseat opposite, “Holy moly in a family where some of us make a living watching paint dry; we now have an exciting new project! Growing our hair! We should so make a reality TV show!”
Jenny looked over her glasses. “I think you forgot, Jorja dear, that some of us make a living counting and playing in mud.”
Jorja hunched her shoulders and grimaced. “Oops, sorry Mom. But on the subject of making a living or not, I have been keeping a secret.”
Crawford put down his knitting and Jenny put down her book. Malcolm smiled.
“You? Keep a secret?” they said.
***
Sasha walked towards Merry Peters. “You own the flower shop?” she asked.
“Yes; I own ‘Blooming Things’.”
Sasha went to hug her, but stopped suddenly.
“How interesting; but what was the phone call about?” Amanda asked.
Dustin quickly smiled and said, “If we can be so bold as to ask?”
“Oh sure,” said Merry, as she dug her cigarettes out of her pocket and lit one up. “My Manager told me yesterday that she had a buyer for her parent’s house and would be moving away, and I just found out my delivery boy was literally just arrested. At my shop; while on duty! Oh sorry,” she said waving the smoke away from Sasha.
“Mom,” Sasha whispered loudly, “she doesn’t smell like flowers!”
“I’m cutting down,” Merry whispered back, “but yeah, I still stink.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t eat so much garlic,” Maisy advised.
Dustin and Amanda tried to stifle their laughter.
“I’m sorry,” Dustin said, “They’re at that age, you know, the ‘see it, say it’ age.”
Amanda frowned and asked, “Do you have it listed with Betty Boothe? Would we have to deal with her to get more information?”
Sasha did a perfect diva snap and announced, “We fired her butt yesterday!”
“Look,” said Merry, “I’ve got to go there right now. Why don’t you folks follow me and you can take a look see at the living quarters above. And we can talk business.”
She started to walk towards her house, but turned back and said, “And no, I don’t have it listed with Betty Boothe. She’s a number one, grade A…”
“Egg?” asked Maisy and Sasha.
Jorja slid off the couch and sat beside Malcolm. Je
nny and Crawford looked at one another, shrugged and slid off the loveseat to the floor. Crawford gave a robust drumroll and Jenny announced, “And the secret is…?”
“Contrary to popular belief; I started to do a little growing up before the shocking and delightful events of the past week,” Jorja said as she winked at Malcolm.
Jenny tapped her chin and looked up at the ceiling, “So under the heading of delightful, we have the birth of Miss Stein’s litter and …?”
Jorja clasped her hands to her chest. “Malcolm is my boyfriend,” she said dreamily.
Malcolm imitated her. He clasped his hands to his chest and said in a high pitched voice, “And Jorja is my girlfriend!”
Jorja smiled at everyone. She suddenly shook her head. “Okay, onto the growing up part. As you know, I regularly visit my friends down at the Glenrosa Nursing home. But what you may not know is that my friends are not limited to the Residents. I am friends with quite a number of the Care Team as well.”
“Logical,” Jenny nodded.
“I saw you in a long conversation with the RN, while I was trapped, I mean, while I was enjoying my impromptu Bingo game with Mrs. Beetle Malcolm said. “And, I noticed you hid a stack of papers from me,” he added.
“Oh, you saw that. Well, that’s the secret!” Jorja said.
Crawford applauded. “I for one am glad that finally came out!” He turned to his wife and said, “Well, that’s over with, let’s go out to the garden, Hon, and see what’s ripening.”
They stood up and Jenny grabbed Crawford’s knitting off the loveseat and put it in a wicker basket and closed the lid.
“First rule of knitting,” she said, “Make sure the cats can’t even try to assist you!”
The little artist tapped her fingers on the hardwood floor. “Look folks, I usually have a machine gun style of information delivery; I was trying for a more mature style of slow and methodical.”
Malcolm said in mock surprise, “You mean there’s more to this secret?”
Jorja let out a slow sigh. “I’ve been working, for some months, on the feasibility of me becoming a Nurse.” She looked around the room. Her audience bore a striking resemblance to mannequins.
“I’ve determined, that like Malcolm, I want to be a Licensed Practical Nurse, but in long term care. Now, the math portion and English portion of the entrance exam should be no problem, but I’ll need to upgrade my Biology.” Jorja started to pick up speed. “I can do my upgrading here on the island; at the satellite campus of the Dogwood University. I’ve met with one of the instructors of the Adult Basic Education course, her name is Rita, she’s very nice; she even said I could come in and work on my biology, while she is teaching other courses, and then I can take my CPR course here too. I texted Aunty Cydney and she already said it would be fine if I stay with her on the mainland while I go to the University. Well, that was before I found out she was my birth Mother and then the course is 18 months, but I’ll be home for semester breaks…”`
“Stop, stop, oh please stop Jorgie girl,” Malcolm pleaded.
“I’m really serious about this Malcolm.”
“Oh, that is not my issue. I’m just catching up with the fact that your Aunt is your birth Mother.”
“Yes, and my Mom is technically my Aunt, but she really is my Mom.”
“If I could just have slow and methodical Jorja back for one wee moment, while I process this.”
“I’m crying Crawford, I’m actually crying!” Jenny said happily as she gave Crawford a big hug.
“We’re so proud of you Jorja,” said Crawford.
“I haven’t done anything yet,” Jorja said grinning.
“That’s it,” Malcolm said standing up and pulling Jorja up after him. “I’ve finished processing! Now we are going to celebrate, Newsome style! I’m taking us all out to the Fierce Food Café in town, and we’re going to get insulted!”
“Oh I’ve been wanting to go there! Tracy said the wait staff is stupendously rude! But first, I have to change. I feel that this is a white dress with orange polka dots occasion.” Jorja looked at Malcolm. “That’s what I was wearing when I met you,” she said.
“Yes you were and your hair was a beautiful turquoise blue!”
“You remember? Wowsers!”
Jenny shook her head and said to Crawford, “Are you pondering what I’m pondering, Pinky?”
“I think so, Brain, but if we give peas a chance, won’t the lima beans feel left out?”
Anthony was feeling very left out. His roommates had gone back to work; his dance company was already rehearsing for their next tour and Jessica and Ryan were in Hawaii camping. It sucked to be him.
Why did he let those idiots talk him into jumping off the shed onto the trampoline? His plan on Friday was just to have a couple of drinks with the guys, and then catch a red eye flight to the mainland and then another to Hawaii. Sleep on the plane, then Aloha! Wedding party!
The phone call he made earlier to his Artistic Director did not help his self-esteem either.
“You broke your foot in Hawaii?” Mr. Gavin had asked.
“No,” Anthony said, “I broke it before I got on the plane.”
“Can you sue the airline?”
“No, no, before I even got to the airport.”
“We only gave you a week off Anthony; but this? Well this is impossible! Now we have to scramble around for another dancer for the performance. No matter! Don’t you worry Anthony, we’ll be okay. I have dozens of applications on my desk. Now for you, be sure to get a good physiotherapist, keep up your cardio training and we’ll see you when we see you!”
With that, Mr. Gavin had hung up. Anthony had tried to phone his cousin Ryan, but the call went through to voice mail.
“Honeymooners!” Anthony said with disgust.
He continued to feel sorry for himself. Anthony knew that as part of the Blackberry Festival, there was a free matineé at the local theatre; he supposed he could catch a cab there. He searched his phone to see the title of the movie. “Despicable Me 2” was playing.
“As in, my career is despicable to me too,” he said aloud. He shifted his position in his chair and felt sharp pains in his foot. “Stupid pain meds aren’t working!” he grumbled.
He carefully eased his way out of the chair and hobbled over to the fridge. “A glass of wine might just take the edge off,” he thought.
The waiter shifted his weight back and forth as he looked Crawford up and down.
“You need the pasty-boy special,” he said as he turned and yelled to the kitchen, “One pasty-boy special for Mr. Freckles! The Waiter nodded and said, “You’re going to have the salmon with shitake, with a nice kale and spinach salad. And definitely some asparagus tips; oh definitely! For a man your age, Vitamin K, so important to maintain bone strength!”
His name tag said “Hello, my name is Kyle. Use it wisely.”
He looked at Crawford again. “And don’t even get me started about your prostate!”
Crawford threw his hands up in mock horror. “Please, try to restrain yourself! My prostate doesn’t like to be talked about in public!”
Kyle pursed his lips. “Well, we’re going to chill you a pot of green tea, but, really Mr. Freckles! You look fairly anemic! You see that great ball of orange in the sky? It’s not just for decoration, you know. Now go stand outside and get some Vitamin D while your meal is being prepared!”
Crawford dutifully pushed back his chair and walked outside.
Jorja put up her hand. “Me, me, insult me next,” she giggled.
Kyle squinted his eyes. “I’m thinking thyroid because of your short stature but you just might be in the Darwinian end of the gene pool,” he mused. Kyle leaned over and grabbed a fistful of Jorja’s hair.
“Girl, what have you done to your hair?” He again yelled in the direction of the kitchen, “Lemon grass water; STAT!”
Jorja barely had time to raise her eyebrows at Malcolm, when a large tumbler was placed in front of her.
Kyle sat in Crawford’s empty chair and laid his head on the table. He looked at Jorja. “The cuticle on your hair follicles is probably stripped,” he said very sadly, “but I cannot even fathom what you’ve done to your brain.” He pointed at the water. “This is just the beginning of many many months of detox you need.”
“Months?” Jorja squeaked.
“No!” Kyle said as he stood up, “I’m not engaging you in further conversation; I doubt you’ll be able to understand it anyway. Just know this; you must stop bleaching your hair, NOW! “
Jorja saluted him smartly. “Aye, aye captain. What’s for lunch?”
“You’ll be having a large citrus salad and nori wraps filled with avocado and salmon.” Kyle slapped his forehead. “OMG, I almost forgot about selenium!” He reached over to a nearby table, told the patrons, “You’re done with this,” and grabbed the bowl of shelled Brazil nuts.
“I’ll give you some of my nuts as well,” he said putting the bowl in front of Jorja.
Jorja attempted a Scottish accent and said, “Laddy, don’t you think you should…rephrase that?”
Kyle completely ignored her and turned his attention to Malcolm. “You sir are a conundrum!”
Jenny looked at Jorja and mouthed the word “Sir”. She elbowed Malcolm and said to him sotto voce, “Aren’t you special!”
The waiter put his hands around Malcolm’s right bicep. “Good muscles and muscle tone, but the dark circles under your eyes are not attractive in the least!” He looked at Jorja very disapprovingly and asked Malcolm, “What have you been doing at night? No matter, we’ll fix you up with a lovely starter cup of butternut squash soup, with a hint of nutmeg; a luscious quinoa salad, and a thick slice of flaxseed bread.”
Kyle leaned in close to Malcolm, flicked his hand towards Jorja and said, “And promise me that you’re going to pour olive oil over her head every night?”
Crawford walked in the door, but Kyle pointed to the exit and said “Out.”
Jorja & Malcolm (Toffee Kisses Book 1) Page 12
