by Kaci Rose
“Yeah, I wanted to enjoy the night air and think.”
“How was Teddy today?” Lexi asks.
I knew this question was coming.
“Well, how much do you know?” I ask.
“Not much more than you. He was in a blast and is the only survivor. He’s expected to walk again, as long as he puts in the work. We suspect the guilt of surviving is what’s keeping him from moving forward,” Lexi says.
“I think there’s something more than that,” I say.
“We agree, but you look like you know something,” Noah narrows his eyes, looking at me.
I don’t think I can handle talking about this twice in one day.
“I’ve been in his shoes, and I can see his point of view. There’s just something more to it.” I stand and try to smile. “I’m going to turn in. See you tomorrow.”
Lexi and Noah look at each other, and then smile at me.
“Talk to you tomorrow,” they both say.
I head to my room and take a shower. What is it about this place? I hadn’t talked about Julie in years to anyone. Not even the last two guys I dated.
Something about Teddy, though. I knew he’d understand without asking a million questions. That’s all it is, right? It’s not anything more. I just met the guy for crying out loud.
No, it has to be something about Oakside that pulls the truth from you. That has to be it.
Chapter 5
Teddy
It’s been a week since Mia told me her story on the front porch of Oakside. She has been in every day since to either take me to my physical therapy appointments or to have lunch with me. Some days we talk about me, some days about her, and other days we just enjoy the silence.
Ever since the blast, I’ve been having nightmares. Some nights I’d relive the blast. Some nights the men I lost were blaming me for what happened, which they completely should. I shouldn’t be here; I shouldn’t be alive.
Interestingly though, the more time I spend with Mia, the more the nightmares have started to change. Last night, the nightmare really shook me. I was a witness to Mia’s car accident, and I couldn’t stop it, even though I wanted, too. I couldn’t get to her to help, and I had to watch it all while feeling like I was cemented in place and helpless.
Right now, I’m going to the lobby to enjoy some people watching. I’m not waiting for Mia. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself over and over. I’m not waiting for Mia. I don’t need to see her to convince myself she’s okay, and it was just a dream. Though, a dream that still has me shook up.
I know I’m lying to myself because I’m waiting for her. She has become the best part of my day, and the one bright spot I look forward to. Long after we both leave Oakside, she’s the memory I can hold on to.
Whatever my next steps are, I don’t know. But what I do know is, I’ll hold on to the memories of her smile for years to come.
All around me, people are talking and greeting each other. Some are smiling, some are crying, but everyone seems to have someone. Must be nice to have family or friends come to visit you. I hope none of them know the loneliness of having no one.
I’m not paying attention, so I don’t see Easton sit down beside me. He gives me the once over to see how I’m doing and to make sure I’m okay. I’ve come to know the look well because everyone here does it. Even though I know it’s because they care, it makes me uncomfortable.
His dog, Allie a chocolate lab, sniffs my hand. As I’m about to ask Easton if I can pet her, he just nods already knowing my question. I reach over, petting her, which makes her tail go crazy, and it’s an indication that’s exactly what she wanted.
“You know I was a patient here, too.” He says as he looks out over the lobby like I was.
“So, I’ve heard.”
“You’re already doing better than I did.”
I doubt that, I think, as I look over at this man, who is even bigger than me, and that’s saying something, since I’m six foot tall and all upper body muscle. If you saw Easton walking down the street without knowing him, he looks like a bad motherfucker with the height, scars, and beard. That’s why he’s perfect for security here at Oakside. Those that know him and get to know him are aware that he’s a good guy.
“I was held as a prisoner of war for a year.” He holds out his arm closest to me, and that’s when I notice, mixed with the tattoos, are scars of all different shapes and sizes.
They’re not easy to look at. Some appear to have been made with a knife, some are burns, and some made with something more jagged than a knife. I’m sure what he isn’t saying is those scars are on more than just his arms.
“I got here and didn’t let anyone in. I didn’t talk. Hell, I didn’t even leave my room for anything. In fact, I didn’t let anyone in my room either. I also didn’t heal, until I opened up. You have to rip the Band-Aid off, and reopen the wound, so it can heal right.”
I hear what he’s saying like when a bone needs to be reset to heal correctly, you have to make it a bit worse before it gets better. That sounds like a whole barrel of fun.
“What changed to make you open up?” I ask him.
He smiles, almost lost in a memory, before he talks. “My reason to talk was my Paisley. I wanted to be better for her; to be worthy of her. To this day, she’s still my reason for doing everything. Allie here helped a lot too, but it was Paisley who pushed me to take on Allie.”
Easton reaches down to pet Allie, giving her attention, and she eats it right up. Ever since I’ve been here, the dog is always at his side. I’ve enjoyed watching them from a distance, and Allie is always watching Easton. When they sit to eat, Easton is always slipping her bites of food. They have a remarkable bond.
“You need to find your own motivation. It can be family, friends, a job, a dream, or whatever it is. Just figure it out, and then latch on to it every day. Use it to push, when you think you’re at your limits. You’d be surprised what the right motivation can do for a person,” Easton says.
That’s when Mia walks in. My eyes are glued to her. She’s in shorts and a tank top that shows off her tan skin, but isn’t overly revealing, and somehow that makes it even sexier.
As soon as her eyes land on me, she smiles and waves, and then goes to talk to Lexi at the front desk.
That’s when I hear Easton chuckle.
“Then again, maybe you already have found your motivation.”
I can’t even argue with him, because the whole time he was talking about finding my motivation, her face was what came to mind. She’s the reason I’ve been pushing this last week, and the reason I want to keep pushing.
Her story has been at the front of my mind. If she can overcome what she did and attempt to walk again, then so can I. I’ll walk again, heal, and get out of here. To do what I have to do, I have no idea, but I’ll meet with a counselor, as I begin to have some direction.
Mia finishes talking to Lexi, and then walks over, as Easton stands up.
“Hey, Mia,” Easton smiles.
“Hey, Easton. Hello, Teddy.” She smiles, placing her hand on my shoulder.
Over the last week, she’s done this more and more, and I find myself reaching for her every now and then, too. That small touch comforts any anxiety I’m feeling, and at the same time, the sparks and tingles from her touch steal my breath.
It leaves me wondering if she needs the connection, as bad as I do. I can’t be the only one feeling this between us, right? Though, I don’t dare ask her. I don’t want to let her think there might be more between us. There can’t be.
Just then, Jake walks up. He’s another security guy here, and he’s said hi to me a few times, but we haven’t really had a chance to talk. He too has a dog with him, Atticus.
Easton looks at Jake and says, “So, Lexi is having Paisley and me over for dinner next week to get to know Mia a bit more. Paisley has been bugging her. You should come too, Jake.” I hate that her attention is on him. Easton looks at me and smiles like he knows this an
d is doing it on purpose. I wouldn’t put it past him.
“That sounds great! I could use some friends here,” Mia smiles.
“Just let me know when, and I’ll be there. You won’t see me pass up any of Lexi’s food.” Jake says, before leaning in to whisper something to Easton.
“Well, talk with Lexi and get the details,” Easton says to Mia before he nods at me, and then goes off to go talk to Lexi.
Mia turns to me. “Alright, you have a PT appointment. You ready?” Not really, but I won’t tell her that. No one likes getting their ass kicked and handed to them. That’s exactly what PT is. They ask you to do things that, before for the accident, would have been a cakewalk, and now, I struggle and sweat to get it done.
It’s a reminder of how much I have lost, no matter how much they say I’m improving. I know I’m improving, but it’s slow. I haven’t told Mia, but they have me up and walking some in PT. I wasn’t able to do that just a week ago. So, I know it’s working.
“Yeah, will I see you after?” I ask, hoping she’ll wait for me, like she has been.
“Yep, I just got here, so I’m here all day.”
I wish she meant she was here to see me all day, but I know she’s here to help other patients, too. I just try not to think about it.
“Good,” I smile.
Maybe, I can push a bit harder in PT today.
Just a bit.
Chapter 6
Mia
I’m sitting in the hallway, waiting on Teddy to finish his PT session, when a girl I don’t know sits down beside me.
“Hi, I’m Mandy. Lexi said I should come to meet you.” Her bubbly personality reminds me of Lexi, and I can see how they might be friends.
“I’m Mia,” I smile.
“It’s nice to me you. I’m the charity coordinator here. I run all the fundraisers, secure donors, and that kind of thing.”
I’ve heard Lexi mention her a few times, but we haven’t crossed paths until now.
“I’m sure it takes a lot of money to run this place,” I say, thinking the upkeep alone on this old plantation home has to be astronomical.
“It does, but we have had some great donors. Lexi says you are friends with Ellie and Owen?”
“Yeah, Ellie is my best friend. I work for them, as a nanny for their kids, but since they’re taking a long summer vacation, I’m volunteering here over the summer.”
“Owen’s company is one of our biggest donors. If we had a few more like him, we’d be set. Did Lexi tell you about the fundraising we have going on now?”
Lexi and Ellie bonded at an event in Knoxville, and that’s how I found out about this place. Ellie will tell anyone who will listen about it. I know they’re always raising money, trying to get Oakside to be one of the top of the line rehab facilities for military men and women.
“No, not really.”
“We’re raising money for the barn. We need to restore it, and then we want to bring in some horses and provide equine therapy. There’s also a chicken coop off that way we want to repair and start raising our own chickens. Any food we can grow ourselves offsets food costs.”
It makes sense. They need to use their resources as effectively as they can. I know they started a vegetable garden, and many of the guys help out there. I’ve been out there a few times myself already.
“What type of fundraising are you doing for the barn?” I ask.
“Right now, we have a small Gala set up in Charleston. Lexi’s brother is going to speak. He was injured in the same blast Noah was, and Noah actually saved his life. Anyway, we’re hoping that’s enough to start the repairs. We have a company willing to donate their time, so we just have to buy the materials. If you can think of any way to raise money, let me know. We’re willing to try just about anything.”
I make a mental note to start doing some brainstorming, and maybe talk to Ellie about this later. She has seen some interesting fundraisers, since she’s been with Owen.
“I’ll think about it,” I say just as the door opens, and Teddy comes out.
He smiles when he sees me sitting here.
“Well, I’ll see you later,” Mandy says. “It was great to meet you. I’m sure Lexi will set up a girl’s night soon, so I’ll see you then.” She then heads off.
“We have some time before lunch. Do you want to go for a walk with me?” I ask.
“Sure, I could use some fresh air,” he says.
We walk outside and towards the barn. With all of Mandy’s talk of it, I want to see it up close, and check out what needs to be done. It would be great if the fundraiser was enough to at least fix the place up.
“This barn looks bigger up close than it does back at the main building,” I say.
“It does. It’s beautiful, and they want to keep a lot of the old structure. I heard Noah saying they want to keep as much of it as possible. I guess there was a fire here, during the Civil War, and most of the outbuilding was lost. So, the ones they still have, they’re trying to restore,” he says.
“So much history here. It would be great, if they got the horses before I left. I love horses. Would you ride once you were up and walking again?”
“Yeah, I think it would be a fun way to pass the time.” He says, but his tone doesn’t have me fully convinced.
Maybe, I hit a sore spot, so it’s probably best to just drop it and not push the subject right now.
“Well, let’s get you back, so you don’t miss lunch.”
We head back, but the barn still stays on my mind all day.
* * *
When I get back to my room after dinner, I collapse on the couch. Not even a full minute later my phone rings. How she knows when to call I’ll never know.
“Hey, how’s it going?” Ellie asks.
“It’s great but exhausting. How’s the road trip? Where are you right now?”
“It’s going good. We just got into Amarillo, Texas, and will be staying here a few days and exploring. I can’t wait to have a good Texas steak.”
I can hear Owen in the background, laughing. Owen can have the best steak in the world flown in for her at a moment’s notice, but she refuses to let him. So, Owen finds it amusing, when Ellie gets like this. Heck, I do, too.
“How are the girls handling the trip?” I ask.
Allie is eight, and Becca is six. They’re from Ellie’s first marriage. When their dad ran off to Vegas with some girl, that’s when I met Ellie. It wasn’t easy, but she was so strong and picked herself up. From the beginning, I got to watch Ellie become this strong woman and take care of the girls.
Then later, I got to watch her and Owen meet, and then fall in love. He was able to adopt the girls recently, and you would never know they weren’t his. He loves them and spoils them rotten.
Both those girls are amazing, and watching them each day, is like getting paid to hang out with my best friends. It’s the dream job I never knew I wanted.
“They’re loving it. Owen is spoiling them rotten with snacks and dessert every day. He’s picking these fancy RV parks with all the bells and whistles, and they have been swimming every night. That’s where they are heading to now. When I said I needed to call and check on you, he rounded them up and got them ready to take them to the pool, telling me to take my time. So, spill it all. Keep in mind, I can verify your story with Lexi.”
I can tell by her tone she has already talked to Lexi, but I decide to play with her a bit.
“Spill what?”
“The guy.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Lexi says you’re hanging out with one guy more than the others.”
“Because she asked me, too.”
“Don’t give me that bullshit.” Ellie laughs, but it’s her evil ‘I have ways of making you talk’ laugh.
“His name is Teddy, and yes, I’ve been spending time with him. I feel drawn to him, like we share a past, and I might be able to help him.”
“Share a past?” She asks softly
.
“Julie. I told him about Julie,” I whisper.
“Oh, Mia. Is he struggling with a similar situation?”
“Yeah, but only on a bit bigger scale. I just feel like I might be able to help him.”
I don’t admit that helping him is healing for me, too. Everyone thinks I’m fine and living my life, but there isn’t a day I don’t wake up and think of Julie and promise to live my life for her. For the life she never got to have.
“Then, it sounds like this is good for both of you,” Ellie says.
“Maybe. Did Lexi tell you about the barn?” I ask, trying to change the subject, and thankfully, she lets me.
“Yeah,” Ellie says. “It’s their next project that they’re doing some fundraising for. I wish we were out that way, because we’d go and get some others to go with us.”
“Can Owen ask a friend to go in his place, and maybe, bring some people with him?”
“That’s a good idea. I’ll ask him. You know we were talking about Oakside just last night and had an idea. He’s going to make Oakside one of the charities his company donates to monthly. So, every month they’ll get a donation.”
“That’s a great idea. I wonder if we can get some other companies to do that. If they have a set amount that they can count on each month, it will make budgeting a lot easier, I’m sure. Maybe, do some sort of challenge video on social media. Even smaller companies giving a few hundred dollars a month would help.”
“That was Owen’s thought. I guess he’s talking to a few people. His goal is to have enough monthly donations to cover operating costs, so they don’t have to worry about paying bills, while they restore the rest of the grounds and raise money for the barn and aquatic center they want to build.”
“I really love it here, Ellie. It’s so calm and relaxing. The guys are great. They all have their issues, but they have each other’s backs, too.”
“I knew this would be good for you. I don’t want to lose you as the girls’ nanny, but I think you need to stretch your wings a bit, too.”
