by Anna Burke
“First you must do this,” I said as I folded my arms across my chest. She did the same, fire causing both our shadows to move with us. “Now this,” I said thrusting my hands down at my sides, as if in anger. The tiny girl did the same. A few ripples of laughter bubbled up from my sisters, in recognition of my habit.
“Here is the pony part, Izzy. We must stamp our feet, like this, paw at the ground then, throw our heads back like a pony just before it runs.” Again she followed me, her tiny feet kicking up a little dust, her long curls tossed as she moved her head. She started to giggle, as did others watching us.
“Now, let’s go,” I said as I reached down and snatched her up into my arms. In a spurt of great speed we circled Guillermo and his parents, so swiftly that the air had trouble keeping up with us. Izzy shrieked with delight until we stood in front of them again.
“Do it again, Bernadette, please. Let’s show them El Pinto again,” she pleaded, giggling uncontrollably.
“Oh no, Izzy. We must not use our El Pinto very often or the pony in us will be too tired to help us when we need it. But you may practice, a little, if your mother says it’s okay.” With that she scurried back to her mother.
“May I, Mother? Will you practice with me?” Her mother was laughing so loud I could not hear exactly how she replied. Guillermo spoke, fixing me with that gaze that made the rest of the world fall away.
“Did I exaggerate when I told you that the woman of my dreams was born of the sunrise over the Sea of Cortez, a creature of beauty and charm?”
“No you did not, Son. And surprising speed too,” his father said smiling. Isabella, standing beside him, stepped forward to embrace me.
“Please, let’s all go inside and get settled in. There will be more time to get to know each other better, although I think we have all learned quite a bit tonight already.” She smiled, then tossed her head back, El Pinto style, and laughed.
Ranch hands and servants had appeared to help. The air was alive with questions and answers about where to take items as they began to unload the trucks. No one wanted to lose the last rays of the sunlight so they moved quickly. The large fire pit in the center of the courtyard and torches set at intervals along the driveway lit up the night as it fell. The happy chatter echoed that night as we found our rooms, unpacked a little, and then, came back outside for a late dinner.
I felt relieved that we ate our dinner in the open air. The food was not so different from what we served at home—more meat and less fish, of course, cooked over an open fire as we often did. Beans and tortillas, roasted peppers, tomatillas and onions, and arroz con pollo. Flan for dessert—sweet and delicate. For the first time, I tried tequila. Only a little, thankfully, because it seemed more powerful to me than the rompope we drank at Christmas time.
More wonderful than the food was the raucous table talk and behavior, just like home! I tried to catch Juanita’s eye, but she hardly looked up. Guillermo’s family told stories about him, many that I had not heard before. The children sat at their own table, chaperoned by Izzy’s mother, Consuelo—Connie as she was called, since she shared the same name as Izzy’s great grandmother. I did catch her eye, several times, as she seemed to be watching me much of the time. She smiled, often, and after dinner came to sit beside me when a seat opened up. Izzy was quiet now, almost asleep in her mother’s arms.
“Izzy wanted me to tell you that she is getting much better, already, at El Pinto. You made a new friend tonight, Bernadette. Will you come by tomorrow, if you get a little time to yourself?” Then she drew closer and dropped her voice, “Grandma Consuelo, would like to speak to you, so you should find the time as soon as you can. Our abuela is a good person to have as your ally in this family, trust me, I know that very well.”
I had never thought of a family member as an ally. I had only heard the term used in discussions at school about politics and war. It had never occurred to me that it could have anything to do with family. I got a shiver, and recalled that image of Juanita and her companions standing in the dark. Is that what they were, allies? If you had allies in this family did that mean you also had enemies? I was curious to learn more about this family where gossip and leverage and allies were part of the picture. So, of course, I agreed to meet. I looked around and did not see Great Grandma Consuelo.
“I will find you before lunch, I promise. Please tell your grandmother thank you for the invitation, Consuelo. I would tell her myself, but I don’t see her.”
“Please, call me Connie, you are family, now. I will tell her for you when I get back to her house, where Izzy and I stay. She tires more easily than she used to, when she was a woman of legendary strength and stamina. Great Grandma has gone to do her prayers before sleeping. It is hard for her, sometimes, to deal with her own limitations, but I do what I can to help her. Since I had no place to live after my husband disappeared, she was gracious to allow me to move in with her. It is also a way for me to keep an eye on her for the family.” Like a spy, I wondered, but did not ask? Connie was still watching me closely.
“Despite her limitations, she is still a force to be reckoned with in this family. I will tell her to expect you before lunch. Goodnight, Bernadette.” She smiled as she rose, shifting Izzy in her arms. The little girl was out cold, and did not wake when her mother walked away, following a well-lit pathway along the side of the main house.
“That path will take her to Grandmother Consuelo’s house, Bernadette.” I jumped a little at the sound of Guillermo’s voice. Perhaps I was still spooked by the three witch birds or the mysterious summons from Grandma Consuelo. I sighed, relaxing as I took the hand Guillermo offered me.
“That’s good to know, since I must find my way to meet with your grandmother tomorrow.” He placed my hand around his arm and walked me back inside the hacienda. The place was bustling with activity in the main room and along all of the corridors leading to different wings of the enormous house. I was glad to have Guillermo as my guide, since I wasn’t quite sure I could remember which room I was sharing with my older sister Theresa. I was also glad that Guillermo’s parents were not around. I was too tired to deliver another of the speeches I had practiced.
“Bernadette, you will love my grandmother. It is her curiosity about you that has caused her to ask to spend time with you. You have already created quite an impression among my family members, just as I knew you would,” he patted my hand, smiling sweetly as he spoke those words.
“I hope that’s in a good way,” I said with all sincerity. “I am happy to meet with Grandma Consuelo, who I have learned, is a force to be reckoned with, whatever that means.” Guillermo laughed, heartily.
“It means she is still at the heart of this family. She has already begun to sing your praises. I heard her telling my sister, ‘now that is a girl worth knowing better,’ as she sent her to you with that invitation.”
“Well, I will do my best to be worthy of such praise. I have also learned that she is an important ally to have, even though I admit I have don’t really know what that means, either. If it’s important, for your sake, I hope she will agree to be an ally. Your family is complicated, Guillermo,” I said as we stopped at the door to what must be my room. I wished I had kept better track of its location as we walked, since I still wasn’t sure where we were in relation to the rest of the house. The heavy wooden door with a brass handle beckoned. Behind it was a room with little adornment but large, well-made furniture, including a sturdy bed with the softest bedding I had ever felt. I longed for it now, even though it would mean letting go of Guillermo’s arm.
“Just be yourself, Bernadette, and you will soon have her in the palm of your hand.” With that he looked around to see that we had the hallway to ourselves. He took my hands in his and kissed the palm of each of them. My heart fluttered and I felt a rush of warmth, driving away the last remnants of the chill from the night air and Juanita’s stony eyes.
“I will come for you in the morning. We will have breakfast outdoors so you can
see how beautiful our mornings are here in this valley. There is still a little snow on the mountains, even in May. There’s good news, though. You will get to sleep in a little, since we do not get up until dawn around here. After breakfast my mother and I will show you, and your mother, the rest of our house. Theresa and Rosa are welcome to join us, too. My sisters are likely to already have whisked them away and put them to work on one of their projects. Then, you will have time to drink chocolate with Grandma who will, no doubt, have something for you to eat, too. When you are done, I will be waiting for you in the courtyard.” I tried to commit the schedule to memory. This family was turning out to be not only complicated, but energetic and busy, too.
“Will you do me one favor?” Guillermo asked, fixing me with his dark eyes, causing me to flush again.
“Why, of course, Guillermo, if I can.”
“Wear something for me tomorrow, the color of the roses that bloom on your cheeks.” I blushed, again, but already began thinking of what I could wear. With that he took me in his arms and crushed me to him. We smoothed our hair as we parted a moment later.
When I entered that room, the fragrance of roses embraced me. A vase was filled with large, deep pink, velvety blooms. Guillermo must have sent them to my room sometime during the day. The sight of those blooms, in the glow of the one light my sister had left on in the room, filled my eyes with tears. I said my prayers quickly, then, climbed into bed without waking my sister, Theresa. I was so exhausted I was barely able to complete one decade of the rosary, before sleep carried me off. The roses followed me into dreams that were filled with a rosy glow and that glorious scent.
11 Leverage of a different kind
I learned many things the next day from that meeting with Consuelo. She quickly asked me to call her Grandma Consuelo. After an exchange of polite conversation about my room, breakfast outdoors, and my tour of the rest of the house, we were seated in a modest sized room beside a large fireplace. Connie brought us hot chocolate with a toasted marshmallow floating on top. She set out plates for each of us containing a small chocolate tart topped with spicy pecans and slices of deep pink papaya. When we were finished eating, Connie excused herself, removing our plates, but leaving us to finish the cups of chocolate we sipped.
Grandma Consuelo then gave me her own version of the story of the ranch, its business, and the family members who ran it—a partnership of some kind that also included family members who did not live on the ranch. This was, indeed, a very interesting family. It was even larger than my own. Much larger, with more money and ties to many people outside their home and family. When she finished telling me about their life built around land and cattle, she asked about ours, built around the sea.
My grandparents had gone to San Felipe from Sonora—on the other side of the Sea of Cortez. When they made that move, they left behind other family ties, so I knew little about relatives who lived outside of our small town. I had an uncle and aunt in town, and heard, on occasion, about my mother’s younger sister who had gone to the United States. Aunt Anna married a Mexican-American man who came to San Felipe to buy fish. She moved with him to the Imperial Valley, near El Centro, where he had become a desk man, working for the company that brings fish to market.
I added little comment, since I had never paid much attention to how it was that our family was so dispersed, nor had I thought to ask. I accepted my small world as it was. I wondered if there was intrigue in my own family, stories that went untold, or might have been told if my own abuela had lived to be as old as Grandma Consuelo.
Grandma Consuelo was the oldest woman I had ever met, I was quite sure of that, even though I didn’t ask about her age. Her face was wrinkled from years and years in the sun and wind. I learned that she used to ride beside her husband to inspect the ranchlands and the cattle. It was a rather scandalous thing to do at the time, especially since she did not ride sidesaddle. Now all of the women who lived on the ranch had riding breeches and learned to ride early.
“I have only been to the seaside once, traveling with my husband to Sonora. The visit was a sad one—for a funeral of a business associate. It was hurried, too, so that I had no chance to come to know it the way you have done. I do remember the play of color and light on water that met the sun as it set. The way the sea moved surprised me the most. It was so different than the movement of water running through creeks and rivers around us here. I wish now I had stayed longer to learn more about it.” A woman who rode about the ranch and traveled beside her husband, this was a woman I relished getting to know better, ally or not.
“Yes, understanding the rhythms to that movement is important to families who make a living from the sea. Not just the tides that raise and lower the water’s level for boats of different sizes, but signs that warn of danger from the weather. Or currents and eddies that tell fishermen where they should trawl for fish or shrimp.”
“Guillermo tells me there are troubles with that—finding enough fish or shrimp for all who need it in order to live.” I felt a spark of surprise. Had Guillermo spoken to his grandmother about the sea running out of fish?
“Yes, I have heard concerns from Guillermo and from my father and brothers about too many boats and too many fishermen. Yet I have seen my father’s trawler nearly bursting at the seams from their catch. It seems hard to believe, doesn’t it?”
“Guillermo has many ideas that are hard to believe, but he is a man ahead of his time. Like his grandfather who had the same name. He imagined living in wide open spaces and owning a ranch with thousands of head of cattle. Can I tell you a secret, Bernadette?”
“¡Claro que sì!”
“I thought my Guillermo was too big for his boots, or maybe even a little crazy, como una cabra!” She laughed and you could see how she had gained many of those wrinkles on her face. “Perhaps you have wondered the same thing about your Guillermo?” I thought about it before I spoke.
“My Guillermo is the most thoughtful man I have ever met, and yes, he thinks and says things that are impossible to believe. I have worried that others might think he’s crazy, like a goat, but I don’t believe he is. I like what you have said, and I believe it is true that Guillermo is a man ahead of his time. So only time will tell.”
“Sì, la verdad es hija del tiempo,” she said. Truth is the daughter of time. “Guillermo must have that time, Bernadette, don’t you agree?”
“I do! He says it will take him more years to read all of the books he must read to learn how to care for the land. That’s another thing I find hard to believe since he has already read more books than I had imagined had been written. Has he told you how many books he has read?”
“Oh yes. That is his grandfather’s fault, too, Bernadette,” she said wagging her head back and forth. “Come, I must show you something.” She stood, taking a moment to straighten herself out. Then, I trailed behind her as she took me into her bedroom. It was a comfortable room, smaller but not so different than the rooms I had seen that morning in the big house. We crossed the room to another doorway. She opened that door and I was overcome with awe.
“This was my Guillermo’s gateway to heaven. He spent many hours reading late into the night as a young man, and even more as he grew older.” The room was a simple one, but on every wall there were shelves. Shelves that reached to the ceiling, crammed with books. It was the first library I had ever seen. She smiled, as she spoke sweetly.
“Your Guillermo spent many hours in here with his grandfather. Not only reading books, but talking with his grandfather about them—love and books are bound together in Guillermo’s heart, I am quite sure, Bernadette.” I understood so much more about Guillermo in that single moment.
“It is no wonder he went to Mexicali to find more books, and wants to go now to California where there are more still. It is in the blood that makes his heart beat so strongly,” I said.
“Yes, but I am afraid that his father does not feel the same way. He was always drawn to more practical matters, enjoyed phy
sical challenges—virtuous and even heroic efforts to tame the land and expand our holdings. A dream always sits atop a mountain of labor. My Guillermo, and yours, sees plowing through words and ideas as part of that work, but my practical-minded son does not.” I could tell that this woman, who now seemed to me every bit as thoughtful as her grandson, was growing tired. The weariness that set in was not just from our conversation but from the struggle that had been going on around my Guillermo’s fate.
“Grandma Consuelo, may I take you to sit down?” I took her by her arm and let her lean on me as we headed back to the comfortable chair where we were sitting before.
“This is very important, Bernadette. The practical men in our family are fine men. Guillermo’s father, and his brother who would happily take Guillermo’s place at his father’s side, are more than capable to run the ranch as it is today. But in those books that Guillermo wants to read is the vision of the ranch as it will be tomorrow. I worry that the practical men see only what has been and not what lies ahead. When they apply the leverage to you, and try to enlist you to get Guillermo to give up his dream, you must not let that happen, okay?” I wondered at that word leverage, presuming that she and Guillermo had spoken of how I had been used in an effort to sway him from his course. What on earth did that have to do with me, now?
“Grandma Consuelo, I don’t understand, as you do, what it takes to keep the ranch alive. I do know that if Guillermo is to live he has to follow his dream. I would not let anyone stop that, if it is in my power to do anything about it.” She sat back down in the comfortable chair, so large it appeared to swallow her up.
“Thank you, Bernadette. I thought as much, but I needed to hear you say it. Connie,” she called. Connie appeared almost instantly, making me wonder if our conversation had been as private as I thought it was. “Please say goodbye to Bernadette. Guillermo should not be kept waiting for her any longer. He needs you as much as he needs those books, Bernadette. You are in his blood now too. It makes me happy to know he will have a partner to ride along beside him.” She smiled at me as she leaned back and closed her eyes. In no time she had dozed off.
