So her idiotic fantasy of mornings spent just like this with her daughter and Derek both at her side was effectively nixed. Feeling her sanity slowly returning, she pulled her hand away from his. Why torture herself?
“I never realized what I was missing in my life all those years,” Derek said, his voice hushed. “I thought I was happy then, but I was so wrong.”
Wynne didn’t want to hear any of this. It softened her heart toward him all over again, just when she’d thought she was safe from him. “Good night.”
He didn’t take the hint. Although she presented him with her back in an overt attempt to dismiss him, he still toyed with strands of her hair. “You can’t hide forever, you know.”
“Go back to sleep.”
“I’ve decided to buy a house here.”
Her heart stilled. Buying a house sounded so permanent. She’d grown accustomed to Derek living in the Grand Hotel because in a sense, it proved what she’d suspected from the very beginning, that he would soon grow tired of fatherhood and skip town. But a house was different. Wynne tried to picture spending the rest of her life seeing him almost every day. Oh God, she’d never be able to keep from throwing herself at him
“A house?” Her voice betrayed her shock.
“It shouldn’t come as a surprise. We talked about this before. You and Paige live here in Atlantic, so I will too. I’m not tied to anyone or any place. Trina and I are already in the process of selling our place in LA.”
He seemed serious. She wasn’t sure she dared believe him.
“In Atlantic, though, Derek? It hardly seems like the sort of town for you.” She turned over so she could face him again. Part of her realized it probably wasn’t the best time for her to initiate this discussion, but she couldn’t seem to help herself.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” An edge crept into his voice.
“Just that it’s not exactly a place where the Hollywood set runs around.” She met his gaze through the semidarkness.
“We’ve been over this before.” She could see him set his jaw on edge. “That life is in my past.”
Instant skepticism coursed through her. “Are you telling me you don’t ever want to go back to acting?”
“If going back to acting means leaving Paige behind, then that’s exactly what I’m saying.”
Wynne didn’t believe him. He might think he didn’t want to go back to acting, but give him some more time away, more time to realize how much he loved his career, and he’d go back. “If that’s what you’re telling yourself.”
“It’s not just what I’m telling myself. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I want to concentrate on being Paige’s father.”
Paige was his primary concern, as she should be. But Wynne couldn’t quite tamp down the bitterness rising within her. She was nothing more than a convenience to him, a woman with whom he could indulge in an affair without any consequences.
“I still don’t buy that you’ll never go back to acting.”
“You don’t have to buy anything. I’ll prove it to you.”
Paige shifted in his arms as though sensing the turmoil mounting around her. Derek patted her hair and murmured soothing words in her ear until she calmed down again. “You’re upsetting her.”
“I’m upsetting her?” Wynne repeated, so shocked she sat up in bed and let the cover fall to her waist. “You’re the one who’s arguing with me.”
“You’re the one who’s suddenly trying to see the worst in me,” he shot back, his voice low. “I’m doing my best to be a good father and to have a good relationship with you—”
“And to get into my pants,” she interrupted dryly. “Yes, you’re so noble.”
“I never said I didn’t want to sleep with you.” His gaze remained unwavering on hers, intense and disturbing. “That I want you goes without saying. I just said I’m trying to do my best and you seem determined to see me fail.”
That assessment hurt. “I don’t want to see you fail. Don’t put me in the same category as Trina.” If there was anyone who wanted to see Derek fall back into his old habits, it was the grasping woman who had invaded his hotel suite like a disease.
“Don’t bring her into this,” he growled. “This is about you and me.”
“I don’t think it is just about you and me,” she countered. “You’re trying to turn me into Trina. Give me more credit than that. Obviously I think you’re a good man and a good father or I wouldn’t want you to be a part of Paige’s life. And since I love my daughter, I want you to be a good father to her. If that means you buy a house and live in Atlantic forever, then so be it.”
He passed a hand over his face. “I think we should get some sleep. This argument is getting nowhere.”
“You mean like I tried to do half an hour ago?” She turned away from him again.
“Good night, Wynne,” he murmured, sounding as frustrated as she felt.
“Good night.” She hadn’t meant to argue with him, but he’d made it so easy. Or maybe it was a knee jerk reaction to the thought of Derek living in Atlantic forever. Because she knew that inevitably he would move on and she’d have no choice but to watch. Somehow, he’d wormed his way into her affections. She’d lost a part of herself to him, a part that would hurt like hell when he left her.
Her mother’s words reasserted themselves in her mind, along with Trina’s. Men like him didn’t stay faithful to one woman and Wynne had absolutely no business hoping he would. More than that, there was so much of Derek she still didn’t know, the darker sides and depths she should run from as fast as she possibly could.
As she drifted back into sleep, she was even more conflicted than she’d been before. And it was all Derek’s fault.
“I’ll make breakfast,” she volunteered later that morning, taking a deep, calming breath as she headed for the kitchen. Derek was on her heels. “What do you want?”
“You,” he groused, sounding as frustrated as she felt.
She cast him an annoyed look over her shoulder. “To eat,” she stressed. “What do you want to eat?”
His gaze turned molten. “You,” he repeated, his voice low.
Wynne felt her mouth go dry at the images that brought to mind. Damn him, why was he always doing this to her? “I’m not on the menu,” she said firmly. “Why don’t you go check on Paige and see if she’s awake.”
“You won’t be able to ignore this forever, you know.”
“Yes I will,” she forced out, refusing to look at him. If she did, all her resolve would cave.
Bare feet pattering on the kitchen floor interceded just in time. Wynne breathed a sigh of relief as she turned to find Paige padding into the room, rubbing her eyes. Her blonde curls were adorably mussed, she had a pillow crease on her right cheek, and she looked like a little zombie. Paige wasn’t a morning kid.
Seeing her, Wynne smiled. “Morning, baby. Are you still sleepy?”
Paige nodded and let out a big yawn. “Watcha makin’?”
“What do you want for breakfast?” Wynne bent down to drop a kiss on her daughter’s cheek.
“Pancakes,” Paige murmured, yawning again.
Derek swooped down on Paige, lifting her up into his arms and holding her above his head. A beautiful smile curved his lips as he looked up at his daughter. “Wake up, sleepyhead. We’ve got a busy day ahead of us.”
Paige giggled delightedly. “Daddy!”
Wynne felt a pang in her chest just watching father and daughter together. If she wasn’t careful, she’d start reaching for too much. Waking up next to him, being part of this cozy morning scene, it all made her yearn for something she had no right to want. Something that would never be possible with Derek.
Family life.
Until he had unceremoniously wedged his way into her world, Wynne had been satisfied with her life. She had Paige, the flower shop to make ends meet, and her mother lived less than ten minutes away from her. True, from time to time she’d felt like something was missing. Here and t
here she’d pass a couple walking hand in hand and feel a twinge of jealousy. And when Paige had asked about her daddy, Wynne may have caught herself wondering—only once or twice—about how life might have been different with Derek a part of their lives. But for the most part, her life had been completely fulfilling.
Now Derek was doing his best to ruin that. Wynne was equally determined not to let him succeed, not to let him win her heart as easily as he had won Paige’s. Because she knew him well enough to realize that whatever happened, he would always be there for his daughter. No dice with Wynne.
Derek lowered Paige to his chest, plopping a playful, noisy kiss on her cheek, and hugged her to him. Paige threw her arms around his neck. “What’re we gonna do today, Daddy?”
Anyway. Wynne’s eyes narrowed. Hadn’t he said something about a busy day? Good of him to consult her first.
As though sensing her thoughts, Derek met Wynne’s gaze. “I thought we could spend the day together as a family.”
Family. The word struck her with so much force she actually felt her knees wobble. Did the man have any idea what he was doing to her? What kind of games he played with her heart?
“As long as your mama’s not busy, that is,” he added when Wynne remained silent.
“Please, Mama,” Paige pleaded, giving her puppy-dog eyes. “Please say we can be a family today.”
Wynne swallowed. How could she say no to that?
“What did you have in mind?” she asked Derek, pleased her voice sounded so steady when inwardly she rode a roiling tide of emotions.
“I thought maybe we could go ice skating again, then have dinner together back at the hotel.”
“Say yes, Mama,” Paige added, sticking out her lower lip in a pout.
“Fine.” Wynne forced an unconcerned smile to her lips and tried to squelch the flip-flop of her heart at the thought of spending the day with Derek. “I’ll make breakfast and then we can get ready to go.”
The smile Derek sent her way was almost blinding. It definitely melted the icy defenses around her heart. So much for attempting to be immune to him. Wynne could see already it would never work. Not in a million years.
Derek realized something was wrong after they got to the skating rink. He knew when he was being watched. It had happened to him too many times in the past for him not to know the feeling. It wasn’t just the familiar sidelong glances of the local people who had realized a famous actor was in their midst and were curious about him. It was the paparazzi-stalking-from-the-bushes kind of being watched.
He was skating around the curve in the rink when he noticed the scumbag who’d been tailing him earlier watching from the other side of the glass. Derek’s hand tightened instinctively on Paige’s and he pulled Wynne closer against him with his other arm. When he’d suggested skating, it had been for two reasons only. The first was that Paige loved skating and begged him to go again almost every day. The second was—and he was totally unashamed to admit it—that Wynne wasn’t very steady on her feet and it gave him the perfect excuse to hold her body against his. He hadn’t counted on being spied on by camera-wielding slimeballs with nothing better to do than stalk people all day.
Apparently sensing his tension, Wynne slanted him a glance. “Is something wrong?”
Derek debated avoiding the issue, but decided to tell her outright. With Trina in town, things would only escalate and get much worse. Because while he had kept a low profile, Trina Wade didn’t do anything quietly, and once the paparazzi caught wind of her presence in Atlantic, they’d swoop down like a flock of vultures, waiting for their photo ops.
“There’s a paparazzo here,” Derek said softly into Wynne’s ear so only she could hear.
She stiffened, looking up at him. “Should we leave?”
“Only if you want to.” Derek sighed. “I wanted to keep you and Paige out of the spotlight as much as possible, but we won’t be able to do that forever.”
Her expression became unreadable. “Do you want to keep us a secret?”
“Of course not. I just don’t want to make life difficult for the two of you. It’s not your fault I am who I am, and you shouldn’t have to pay the price.”
Wynne seemed unconvinced. “Do you think anyone knows Paige is your daughter?”
Derek looked down at Paige, who looked like an angel with her bobbing golden curls and her rosy cheeks. She grinned up at him impishly. “This is lotsa fun, Daddy!”
He smiled back. “I know, sweet pea.” Derek returned his attention to Wynne. “I haven’t made a secret of it.”
“Will it hurt your career?”
Derek gritted his teeth. Why the hell did they always have to return to this? “Wynne, I told you already I don’t have a career. I’m not going back to acting.”
“That’s not realistic and you know it.” Wynne frowned at him.
His jaw clenched. “Do you want to have an argument in front of him?”
She looked away, giving him her profile, which was just as gorgeous as the frontal view, damn it. He was really having a hard time keeping his attraction to her under control. He knew he couldn’t rush things between them like he wanted to.
“No,” she said finally. “I don’t.”
“Neither do I. Let’s try to have a good time.”
For the most part, they did, despite their brief argument. They skated until their legs tired and then packed into Wynne’s Jeep without being accosted by the paparazzo. By the time they reached Wynne’s loft, Paige snoozed in the backseat, her head hanging forward and her mouth wide open. Derek pulled her from her car seat and was about to carry her into the building when he noticed a flash in his peripheral vision. Wynne noticed it too.
“Derek, someone is over there taking our picture,” she murmured, her voice concerned.
He scanned the cars parked across the street and located a different man sitting inside a black four-door, camera in hand. “Damn.” He turned to Wynne. “Let’s get upstairs.”
When they were inside, Derek barely had time to lay Paige on the sofa and unzip her coat before Wynne started in on him.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on, Derek? Why on earth are we suddenly being deluged by paparazzi?” Her hands were on her hips and her eyes flashed with customary fire.
Derek hated to tell her, but two photographers was hardly a deluge.
He raked a hand through his hair, not really wanting to have it out with her. Unless having it out with her involved wild, abandoned sex, that was. Judging from the expression on her face though, that, unfortunately, wasn’t really on the table just now.
“I have no idea,” he answered honestly. “But I do have a feeling it’s related to Trina.”
“Ah. You mean the not-quite-ex-wife who’s staying in your hotel room?” Wynne’s voice dripped with scorn.
Damn it, what the hell had he done now? “Am I missing something here?”
“What are you doing, Derek?”
He blinked. “What do you mean?”
Paige stirred on the couch and Wynne cast him a glare. “Let’s talk about this in the kitchen. I don’t want to wake her up.”
Great. That meant more arguing was to ensue. Derek followed in Wynne’s wake, admiring the angry sashay of her hips and the fit of her jeans. She really had a great ass and great legs, he thought, momentarily distracted.
After they reached the kitchen, she put him right back on track.
“What I mean is that I don’t know what you want. You wanted us to be a family today. You’re still legally married to another woman. We have people following us and taking our pictures. I don’t know what to expect next.”
His previous lifestyle was highly unorthodox and he was very much aware of that. It was also why he was trying to get as far away from it as possible. He realized the photographers rattled Wynne, which was understandable for someone who had never been hunted down by the paparazzi like he had nearly every day. He also knew Trina’s unexpected drop-in wasn’t helping matters.
> “I understand the paparazzi thing will take some getting used to.” He sighed. “But you don’t have to worry about it or Trina. Eventually, the press will realize there’s no story here and they’ll move on to the next juicy gossip. As for Trina,” he paused, searching for the right words and finding none, “I’m doing my best to end things with her. Her camp has been dragging their feet. I’ll call my lawyer right now if it makes you feel better.”
“No, that’s just it.” Her eyes clouded with an emotion he couldn’t define. “I don’t have the right to ask that of you. I have no claims on you whatsoever.”
She was wrong on that count, but Derek didn’t really want to correct her. There was no sense in admitting she practically owned him. Wynne was on his mind all the time, and when he wasn’t with her, he wanted to be. It was starting to get scary. With Trina, nothing had ever been this intense.
He closed the space between them and took her hands in his. They were cold to the touch, and he rubbed them between his palms. “I’m building a life here with you and Paige.”
Her eyes glinted with wetness. “I can’t afford to believe that. I know too much about you.”
He shouldn’t feel hurt by her words and he knew it. After all, she spoke the truth. His past was worse than checkered, filled with addictions and women he couldn’t even recall. But he was different now, and he’d been stupid enough to believe she could see that.
“I can’t change my past,” he bit out, still gripping her hands. She looked away from him and he took her chin in his fingers, forcing her to face him. “Look at me. Since I’ve been here in Atlantic, have I ever lied to you? Have I ever let you or Paige down?”
Wynne shook her head and a tear rolled down her cheek, dripping onto the back of his hand. “Derek, don’t.”
Derek wasn’t in the mood to show mercy. She’d been tying him in knots for weeks and he wanted her to acknowledge she felt the same way. More than that, he wanted to hear her say he’d been a good father, that he wasn’t the fuck-up he’d been convinced he was.
Win My Love (Love's Second Chance Book 3) Page 11
