The door downstairs opened, ringing the bell in the shop, then closed. She hurried from the bathroom, taking a deep, calming breath. The coming confrontation would not be easy, but she would force herself to go through with it. She folded her hands together and waited, hovering above his packed bag. Derek started coming up the stairs, his head bowed.
Then, as if sensing her regard, he paused and looked up, his blue eyes boring into hers. He never looked more beautiful to her than in that moment, with his strong hand on the railing and his face raised to her. She knew then that she loved him. The realization almost had her stumbling backward.
She pressed her palm to the wall, holding herself still.
“What’s going on, Wynne?” Derek’s voice sounded strangled. His gaze slipped to the bag at her feet, then rose to hers once more.
She couldn’t speak. If she said a single word, she would burst into tears. So she bit her lip and continued to hold his gaze, hating what she was about to do. Hating she had to give up the man she wanted more than anyone in the world.
“Aren’t you going to say anything to me?” His tone sounded edgier, with an undercurrent of anger.
“It’s over.” She managed to force the words past her lips, but they emerged so quietly she didn’t know if he had heard her.
His hand gripped the railing so tightly his knuckles rose in sharp relief from the top of his hand. “What?”
“It’s over,” she repeated, forcing herself to speak firmly, pretending this breakup was what she really wanted.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Derek started coming up the stairs again, his eyes flashing with anger, jaw ticking. “What’s over?”
“You and I.” She faltered, taking a step back as he reached the top step and loomed over her. In his fury, he seemed larger. “Us. Whatever we had, it’s done.”
“Is this because of the argument we had?” Derek raked a hand through his golden hair, forcing it to stand on end.
“No. Yes.” She shook her head. “Sort of. It’s just…I don’t think that you and I work together. I’ve packed your things and I think you should move back into the hotel.”
“I can see that you’ve packed my things.” The smile he gave her was mocking. “Very efficient of you.”
“Thank you.” She swallowed, uncertain of what else to say. All the speeches she’d rehearsed evacuated her mind.
“I didn’t mean that as a compliment,” he growled, stalking closer to her. “Do you really think you can just pack up all my things and pretend like we never meant anything to each other, Wynne? Do you think you can forget the way we were together?”
“Stop.” She retreated until her back pressed against the living room wall.
“Stop what?”
“Stop talking,” she shot out. “And just leave.”
“You can’t be serious about this. We’re so incredibly good together.” He skimmed the backs of his fingers over her neck.
She flinched away from his touch, knowing he could demolish her resolve if she allowed him to do so. “It won’t work.”
“Tell me that you felt the same way before.” He gripped her chin in his fingers, forcing her to look at him. “Tell me.”
Tears welled up in her eyes, making her vision blurry. “I can’t.”
“Then why?” His voice was hoarse, cracked. “Why, damn you?”
“We’re good in bed, but I need more than that. You don’t belong here. You’re an actor, an incredibly talented one, and you finally have your life back.”
“Where the hell is this coming from?”
“I saw your wife and your agent today,” she admitted.
“Ex-wife and ex-agent, you mean. Damn it, Wynne. How many times do I have to tell you that chapter of my life is over? I can’t go back to acting now.”
“Of course you can. There’s a great part open for you. It could make your career.”
“I can make my own decisions.” He slammed his fist against the wall, making her jump. “You don’t need to arrange my life for me. I know what I want.”
“I saw your face in the airport yesterday when that girl asked for your autograph.” Wynne searched his gaze. “I know that you miss your old life.”
“I’d be lying to you if I said there were things I didn’t miss about my past, but that doesn’t mean I want to go back. Don’t shut me out like this now. Not now when you’re what I need the most.”
“Even if you don’t want to go back to acting, which I don’t believe, we need a break.” She slipped away from the wall and walked across the living room to get away from his powerful presence. “You’ll always be welcome in Paige’s life.”
He sneered. “But not yours.”
“Not mine,” she agreed quietly, clasping her hands together. “I’m leaving tomorrow for a week, and I’m taking Paige with me.” Her mother had bumped up the flight to Dallas to clean out Kieran’s house. He wasn’t able to return thanks to his Baltimore Sea Dogs schedule, but that part no longer mattered. Wynne had been eager for the excuse to get away and sort out her feelings.
“The hell you are,” he growled.
“We already have the plane tickets. You can’t stop us.”
Derek shook his head. “I can’t believe you’re doing this. You’re taking my daughter away from me to punish me for something I have no control over.”
“I’m not taking her away to punish you,” she denied. “I’m taking her away because I need to get away, and I’m her mother. While we’re gone, I want you to think about your options.”
“You know what?” He laughed, the sound holding no mirth whatsoever. “Go to hell, Wynne.” He bent down, grabbed his bag with violent strength and stormed down the steps.
The door below slammed closed so forcefully the bell above the shop door crashed to the floor. Wynne’s legs gave out and she sank into a heap of misery, the tears flowing freely. God, she hoped she’d made the right decision.
Derek had never been closer to relapse in his entire life than he had been the night before. In one day, his world had fallen apart, collapsing like an imploded building. If he had thought Wynne and Paige were important parts of his life, he’d been wrong. They were his life. Plain and simple. He had built his happiness around them, not thinking twice about the concreteness of the arrangement.
Paige would always be his daughter, but Wynne had no tie to him. Now she had dropped him, left him, ended their relationship. After leaving her house yesterday he’d gone to the Grand Hotel and booked a new room. Then he’d gone to an out-of-the-way bar tucked into the corner of a side street that he recalled from his days filming in Atlantic.
O’Shea’s Pub.
He got a stool, ordered dinner and sat there for an hour watching a March Madness basketball game and picking at the burger he couldn’t force down his throat. Then memories slowly sank into his brain, pricking his consciousness. He recalled walking into the bar after a long day of shooting the movie, already high on pain killers, and seeing a gorgeous redhead at a booth across the room.
It had been Wynne.
He started thinking about all the mistakes he’d made then, stringing together a mental list of his screw-ups. Getting hooked on pain killers, getting hooked on alcohol, taking Wynne’s virginity as if she owed it to him, being too wasted to fully remember their night together, marrying Trina Wade…the list went on endlessly until he felt as if he were the lowest piece of dog shit in the world.
Desperation seized him and he called over the bartender, ordering Crown on the rocks. When the guy placed the glass in front of him on the shiny bar, nausea gripped Derek. He stared at the whiskey, at the ice cubes, at the shape of the glass. The taste practically burned his tongue. His fingers curled around the cool crystal edges. Losing Wynne was worthy of a drink, he told himself. Just one.
God, he hadn’t been prepared for the enormity of the hurt. He lifted the glass halfway to his lips before he realized one drink would lead to another, and another, and another, and ultimately
to his death. The glass fell back on the bar, whiskey sloshing over the rim.
He’d tossed a wad of bills on the bar and left, sick with himself and his weakness. That one woman could bring him so low shook him to his core. Hell, it scared the hell out of him.
Because he loved her.
Damn it, he loved Wynne. What if letting her simply jet out of his life at such a crucial moment would be the biggest mistake of his life? Could he afford to chance it? He had to try to see her, tell her, hope to God it wasn’t too late. He strode from his hotel room, determined to try.
By the time he made it to Wynne’s place, she was closing the back door on her Jeep. The engine was running and her mother and Paige were already inside, waiting to leave for the airport. Her eyes widened when he approached her on the sidewalk. She looked beautiful this morning, despite the dark circles under her eyes that betrayed her sleepless night. Maybe she wasn’t as steadfast in her decision as she wanted him to believe.
“Derek.” She rubbed her arms as if she were cold, but the day was unseasonably warm. “What are you doing here?”
“I don’t want you to leave.” He raked a hand through his hair, wanting to reach out to her, to touch her, but afraid she wouldn’t let him.
“What?” Her eyes clouded.
Her mother rolled down the passenger window, poking her head outside. “Wynne, we’re going to be late for the flight.”
Wynne flicked a glance at her mother. “Give us a minute, Mom.”
Eileen gave her daughter a reproving look, but rolled up her window.
“I have to leave now, Derek.”
“What if you missed your plane?” he asked suddenly, giving in to his impulse and touching her elbow.
She flinched away from him. “What is this about?”
“It’s about you and me.” He struggled to find the right words. “I have this feeling that if you leave and get on that plane, when you come back everything will be different. I don’t want you to leave with this anger between us.”
Wynne swallowed, her expression torn. She flicked a glance to the car. “I have to go or I’ll miss the flight.”
“People miss planes,” he pointed out. “It won’t be the end of the world if you miss your flight. Dallas will still be there.”
“It’s important that I go now.” She bit her lip in that adorable way she had that made him want to kiss her breathless. “You need to speak with Lizzie Smith, and with your wife.”
“She’s not my wife.”
“She is. You’re still married.”
Technically, yes. And he realized that wasn’t fair to Wynne. He made up his mind to settle his divorce as expediently as possible. He’d fly his lawyer out from LA if necessary.
“That’s about to change.”
Wynne shook her head sadly. “But you won’t. You’ll always be an actor. It’s a part of you.”
“It’s a part of my past,” he corrected her.
Her mother gave the horn an abrupt honk just then.
“I really need to leave. With me gone, you’ll have the chance to reexamine your life. I think you’ll realize I’m right.”
Frustration mingled with anger, boiling up inside him. “You think I don’t know what the hell I want?”
“I think you’re confused. You’ve been getting your life back together and you’re on the brink of getting your career back. Only a fool would throw that away.”
“I’m not throwing anything away. I have a life here with my daughter. With you.”
“You’ll change your mind,” she insisted.
Her mother rolled down the window again. “Wynne, we’re going to hit traffic on the Beltway. We really need to get going.”
“Another minute,” she murmured.
Eileen reluctantly rolled the window back up again, this time glaring at Derek as if he were a criminal. He turned his attention back to Wynne.
“I won’t change my mind,” Derek told her. “I know what I want.” And it’s you, he silently added. But he couldn’t bare his soul to her yet, not when she was hell-bent on leaving him behind.
Wynne shook her head. “I’ll call you when we land. You have my cell number, don’t you?”
“Yes.” Goddamn it. She was leaving him. He’d made a complete ass out of himself by rushing back here and all but throwing his arms around her legs and begging her not to go while her mother looked on, and she was still leaving him. A hollow void expanded inside his chest.
“I’ll make sure Paige gets the chance to call you every night,” Wynne was saying, tucking a stray tendril of red hair behind her left ear. “She’s going to miss you.”
“And I’ll miss her.” His voice sounded embarrassingly hoarse, even to his own ears.
“Well.” She flashed him a tight smile. “I guess this is goodbye then.”
“I guess it is.” He shoved his hands into his pockets, calling himself a thousand different kinds of fool for coming here in the first place.
She startled him by reaching up to cup his cheek with her hand. “Goodbye, Derek.”
He swallowed. “Have a safe flight.”
Wynne nodded, seemingly reluctant to remove her hand from his face and walk away. Abruptly, she rose on her toes and pressed her mouth to his. The kiss was fleeting, nothing more than a chaste peck. She pulled back and met his gaze, then shocked the hell out of him by pulling his head down and kissing him again. This time, the kiss was hungry and open-mouthed, her tongue meeting his.
The horn sounded again, three times in a row.
Wynne broke off the kiss and stepped away as if she’d just discovered he carried a contagious disease. She pressed a hand to her lips, her eyes wide, and then practically ran away from him, around the side of her SUV. Her door closed with the slam of finality.
As he watched her taillights disappear down Main Street, determination rose within him. He would prove her wrong, damn it. He would show her that acting belonged in his past, and that she and Paige belonged in his future.
In that moment, as he stood alone on Main Street in Atlantic, Maryland, with his hands in his pockets, Derek made a staggering realization. He’d spent his entire adult life chasing happiness, looking for it in all the wrong places. Fame hadn’t brought him happiness, Trina hadn’t, money hadn’t, and neither had the pills or the booze. What he had wanted all along without realizing it was love.
Love.
It was enough to make a grown man feel like a huge baby. Something had changed in him the instant his daughter had put her little arms around his neck and called him “Daddy” for the first time. His legacy as Derek the fuck-up had come to an end. He wanted what normal people had.
To hell with money, with screaming fans and the red carpet. He didn’t give a damn if he ever saw his picture in a magazine, or his name rolling on the credits again. He liked living in this small town. He liked Main Street, with its cozy old buildings. He even liked the beehive-wearing ladies who nosed around in Wynne’s flower shop and mistook him for Brad Pitt. It had certainly happened more than once.
Most of all, he liked the idea of staying here forever with Wynne and Paige, and having half a dozen more kids. The house he had looked at yesterday needed work, but it was a rambling old Victorian with a wraparound porch and almost forty acres of land. Wynne could raise flowers there and Paige could have a pony. There were plenty of bedrooms to be filled.
She could fly away to Dallas for a week if she wanted, but he would still be waiting here when she returned. He had never wanted anything more in his life, and he was determined to have his way. All he had to do was win her heart.
There had been a time in his life when Derek could have chosen nearly any woman in the world and she would have jumped into bed with him. But he didn’t fool himself into believing it had been because of his allure. No, it had been because of his fame. He’d finally found a woman totally unimpressed by it. A woman who wanted no part of his money.
Derek headed back to the hotel, a renewed sense of determinatio
n within him. If he wanted to convince Wynne to spend the rest of her life with him, he had a hell of a lot of work to do.
Wynne missed him.
Pathetic as it seemed, she missed him on Tuesday morning. Just one day into her trip. She tried to tell herself this self-imposed exile would make her stronger, that it would prepare her for when Derek left for good. But none of that made the distance and her weakness any easier to bear.
Paige missed him too. She moped at bedtime. She refused to eat her spaghetti at lunch. She threw temper tantrums every other ten minutes. And every time she got near a phone, she called her daddy to share long, tear-filled conversations with him. Once, Wynne overheard her daughter confiding that “Mama misses you too. She cries a lot.”
She had raised a tattletale.
Heaving a sigh, she sealed a cardboard box with packing tape and wrote “fragile” on the top with a Sharpie. The drudgery of her task should have been calming. Instead, all the folding, wrapping, packing and taping gave her a prodigious amount of time during which she could obsess over Derek and how much she missed the damn man. All this amidst repeated admonitions addressed to herself. You’ve only been gone a day, you idiot.
The telephone rang and she jumped. The coffee table had disappeared thanks to the movers Kieran had hired, and so the cordless sat on the carpet, looking rather pathetic and bereft. Kieran’s first game with the Sea Dogs was tonight, and she was disappointed to have to miss it, but being his moving proxy had given her the perfect opportunity for escape. They were trying to patch up their relationship. The phone rang a second time. Apparently, her mother was too busy to answer it.
With a sigh, Wynne reached for the cordless. It was more than likely an old girlfriend calling for a one-night stand. She hit the talk button. “Hello?”
“Wynne.”
She winced, trying to ignore the way her pulse leapt and her heart somersaulted. Not a member of Kieran’s army of ex-girlfriends, but Derek. “Derek.” She struggled to keep her tone aloof and calm. “What do you want?”
“Can I talk to Paige?”
“Oh.” Her heart plummeted to her feet. Even lower, maybe. Of course he hadn’t called to talk to her. She scolded herself then for feeling jealous of her daughter. “I’ll get her.”
Win My Love (Love's Second Chance Book 3) Page 16
