A scream pierced the air. Malachi was tugging on my mom’s long hair. I looked down the runway and saw the end, a small fence with two lights on top.
“Mom!” I stuck out my hand as far it could reach, paying no attention to whether I would fall or not.
At that same moment, she threw an elbow into Malachi’s face, then literally jumped for me, even though he still had a grip on her opposite arm. She touched my hand, our eyes locking for a split second. “Alexandra!” she yelled. Her face was filled with fear, her brow furrowed like an accordion, her frizzy, gray hair flying all over the place.
I tried to grip her fingertips, but I needed another inch. “A little…bit…closer…”
Jamin appeared, yelling something about Shiloh, then held the young girl out the door. She was wailing, pawing at Jamin to let her back in.
He was going to kill her.
Mom instantly dropped her arm, but her eyes held me for an extra tick. They were remorseful, but also full of love. And in a split second, the airplane lifted from the pavement as Malachi pulled Mom back into the cabin. Brad tugged me back into the van, and Vandiver cut right and hit the brakes. Brad, Archie, and I tumbled over each other, slamming into the front of the van.
Grabbing the dash, I pulled myself up and peered through the jagged hole in the windshield. I watched the single engine plane disappear over a nearby mountain. “She’s gone.”
18
For the second time in a week, I dressed in all black. Bagpipes played Irish music as Mom’s casket was rolled to her gravesite, just a few feet from my dad. A green tarp was draped over the mound of dirt that would soon be shoveled back into the hole. My chest felt tight, as I imagined the piles of dirt being loaded on top of me. Suffocating. That was how I believed Mom must have felt for three-plus decades. And it wasn’t a comforting feeling.
I stared at the box that held my mom’s ashes. It didn’t take much for the funeral home to cremate my mother. She had been dropped—or had jumped, as some had guessed—from the plane just on the other side of the mountain from our van. A hunter found her later that day, about the same time that the FBI caught up with Malachi, Jamin, and Ezra in South Africa. From what Jerry shared, thankfully, the young girl, Shiloh, was alive and physically unharmed. Her mental and emotional state of mind was another thing altogether. Jerry wondered if she would ever be able to blend in with society, feel remotely normal.
Nestled against my side, Luke looked up at me. “It’s kind of strange, Mom. I miss her, even though I didn’t know her.” I ran my fingers through his thick head of hair, swallowing back a lump in my throat.
“I know what you mean, Luke. I’ll miss her too. Actually, I have for a long time.”
Both Luke and Erin had insisted on coming with me to Port Isabel, Texas. While initially I found it almost strange that they’d want to go to a funeral of a person they never knew, I could sense they just wanted to be close to me. I didn’t push back.
Erin hooked her arm inside mine just as the casket was lowered into the ground. “Amazing Grace” played in the background. I couldn’t help but think of those few seconds I had connected with my mother, albeit at over eighty miles per hour. Even through the desperate attempt to escape and all of our lives hanging in the balance, her eyes seemed to say so much to me—sorrow for not being there for me, pride in seeing whom I had become, sadness for knowing it was all about to end.
I felt a hand on my back and turned to see Brad’s caring, strong gaze. He ushered us to the car, and from there, we went to the beach at South Padre Island—that included Vandiver, Jerry, Mario, Gretchen and her boyfriend Brandon, Ezzy, and of course Nick and Archie, both wearing arm slings from their injuries. We had a cookout, played music, and just socialized. For a November day, the weather had cooperated, outside of a blustery, southern wind. I stood barefoot at the edge of the sudsy ocean water creeping up the sandy beach. Puffy white clouds dodged the sun, creating a playful dance of shadows across the rocky edges of the cobalt-blue Gulf.
Jerry came up and said a few caring words, followed by Vandiver.
“If you ever want to put in a transfer, don’t forget about us in West Virginia. We could use you,” Vandiver said.
“I’ll keep it in mind,” I said, though I knew that was the last place I wanted to be. “I forgot to ask about the people in the compound. How many were harmed by the gas?”
“Two died. Ten others had extended stays in the hospital, but they should make it. We were lucky as hell it didn’t turn into another Jonestown… Well, minus the leaders being killed of course.”
“Of course.” I sighed.
“You’ve had your two minutes. Can I have this dance?”
I turned and almost snorted out a laugh.
Archie was down on one knee, bowing his head as if he were kneeling before seventeenth-century royalty.
“Get your ass up here and give me a hug,” I said.
Teetering a bit, Archie lifted up and gave me a one-arm embrace.
“Look out,” he said.
“Oh, sorry. Bruised ribs, right?”
“That’s not the half of it. My ego’s been shredded the last few days.”
I tilted my head, once again not following his train of thought.
“First, Felicia dumped me.”
“I never knew you were really a couple. Didn’t you just do your thing with her in the barn that one time?”
“Shit, she said I was the best sex she ever had. You should have seen some of the text messages I got.” He actually fanned himself. “You want me to show you?”
Shaking my head, I said, “Please don’t. You’ve warped me enough.”
He paused for a second, studying my blank facial expression. Then he popped my shoulder with his good hand, “Oh, I know you’re just joking. Anyway, Felicia’s parting text mentioned that she’d just met a new guy.”
“Wow, she gets around. And her husband?”
“She said he can’t get it up and the only reason she’s still with him is to cash in on his life insurance policy once he smokes himself to death.”
“Nice. What a caring person,” I deadpanned, arching an eyebrow. “You’re better off without her.”
“Yeah, probably so. But man, she was the hottest thing I’ve had since that freaky, possessed woman here in Padre.”
“Who can forget her? She was a beautiful woman.”
“But Felicia was country hot. Know what I mean?”
“No, but for the sake of ending this conversation, yes.”
“Anyway, she told me the new guy is also a vet. And that—” He pursed his lips as the wind played with his helmet hair.
“Do I want to know?”
He ignored my question as he brought a hand to his mouth, as if he were about to pour open his soul. “She said her new vet is hung like Herkimer.”
I had nothing to say.
“Herkimer is her horse,” he clarified.
Oh hell. I winced and said, “I get it. Thanks for the visual.”
I faced the ocean, closing my eyes for a brief moment and took in the salty air.
“Then, on top of that,” he said.
“You’re still here?” I said with my eyes still closed.
“Well, it turns out that Dana at the diner was a bit of a mole for the Camp Israel folks. She was feeding the information she’d overheard at our table to Malachi and Jamin.”
I opened my eyes and looked at him. “No shit?”
“We’ve uncovered a lot more on those two,” Vandiver said as he approached, Gretchen and Nick just behind him, holding adult beverages. “Thanks to Gretchen here, their financial trail has finally been exposed.”
I shifted my eyes to the diminutive SOS.
She said, “I guess you know they were running a phone bank out of their little shed. Apparently, they had created a so-called nonprofit organization that funded spreading the faith into different locations all across the world—a ministry in Guatemala, a school in Australia, and an orphanage in Sout
h Africa. But it was all a ruse. The money was spent on lavish gifts, including enormous mansions and estates in each of these countries.”
“They were like that twisted, money-grubbing scoundrel here in Texas a few years back,” I said.
“Robert Tilton. It’s as if they took a page from his playbook,” Gretchen said.
“So it was all about the money,” I said.
“Who knows?” Nick countered. “At first, it might have been about some supposed higher calling.”
I frowned. “To brainwash and torture women?”
“Good point. But then it evolved somewhere along the way, and absolute power wasn’t enough,” he suggested.
“Apparently, absolute loyalty never existed.” Jerry had just waddled up, kicking sand into our faces. We all turned and tried to spit out the gritty granules.
“Sorry, I’m just not a beach guy.”
“Loyalty?” I prompted him.
“Oh, Jamin can’t stop talking to our FBI investigators in South Africa. He’s dumping everything at Malachi’s feet.”
“What about extradition?” Nick asked.
“Could take weeks, maybe months, but once they turn on each other, it’s like a shark frenzy. We can just sit back and watch the bloody carnage.”
I felt the urge to get involved, to personally go over to South Africa and interrogate the pair of men who had ruined my life, to look them in the eye and make them face their sins. As everyone continued talking shop, I stepped back and watched Erin and Luke toss a football. That was when I realized I had to let it go. To dive back into the moat of bitterness would probably take years off my life. And it would impact my future years with my two kids. They didn’t deserve that. And I didn’t either.
Brad jumped in and played football with the kids, and Ezzy sidled up to me. I put my head on her shoulder as she draped her arm around me. Tears spilled from my eyes. She didn’t say a word. She just held me and loved me.
“Hey, Alex, sorry to interrupt.”
I wiped my face as Nick came up to us. “Before I forget, I wanted you to have something.”
He pulled out two things from his pocket. One was a picture of me. “I must be six years old here,” I said, holding the picture in my hand.
“Investigators found it in your mother’s room. That along with this.” He held up a handwritten note, but the paper was ripped, part of it missing.
“What happened?”
“They don’t know. Found it in a trash can. They only found this part. But it’s obvious she wrote it to you. Mentions you by name.”
He handed me the note, which I quickly gave to Ezzy. “I can’t read it. Not now. I’ve been through enough. Maybe later, after the drama has subsided.”
We turned around and watched the ocean waves crash onto the shore, each of us lost in our own thoughts.
***
Six Weeks Later
Ezzy wrapped up the last of the Christmas decorations and handed me the box. I stuffed it inside a plastic bin and then smacked my hands together. “Another Christmas bites the dust.”
I picked up the bin and brought it to the kitchen, where another ten bins filled with ornaments and other decorations were ready to be taken to the garage. Brad had already made six trips.
Ezzy handed me a mug of hot chocolate, and I sipped it as we watched the kids toss leaves on each other—that was their attempt at raking up the ankle-deep bed of leaves covering the yard. Brad chuckled as he walked past them and came into the kitchen.
“Your back holding up?” I asked.
“I think I might need a deep-tissue massage later. You up for it?” he said, flashing his cute dimples.
I looked at Ezzy, who quickly turned on the water and pretended to wash her hands. I nodded and leaned close to his ear. “That and more.”
He grinned, then headed back outside. Ezzy joined me at the bar, reading the headlines on the newspaper as I thumbed through a few work emails on my cell phone.
“FBI offices in San Antonio are closing early today,” I said. “Some type of crazy ice storms are hitting central Texas. And that’s one area that can’t deal with anything more than a frozen margarita.”
“Always some type of weather drama in some part of the country. Hopefully everyone can stay safe,” Ezzy said, her eyes still perusing the headlines.
Another moment passed. “I can’t take it anymore, Dr. Alex. We need to get this behind you,” she said.
I turned my palms to the ceiling. “Not sure what you’re…”
She pulled a piece of paper from her pocket. “The note that Nick gave you, from your mom.”
I had done a good job of blanking it from my memory. Perhaps it was my own way of dealing with the pain. I felt stronger now, the memories still vivid, but I’d been able to focus on the positive parts of my life and keep a reasonably healthy perspective on what Mom had been through. I knew I couldn’t undo the last thirty years of my life.
“Okay, let’s do this,” I said, taking in a breath.
I opened up the crumpled paper and saw the tear mark right in the middle of a sentence. I apparently had the second half of the note.
And even after everything that I’ve shared with you in this note, I can’t help but feel the biggest regret in leaving you, Alexandra. As I’ve lived all these years in this camp, I’ve gained perspective on who I am, who I used to be. I wasn’t an easy person to love when you were young. I had a lot going on in my mind. I was searching for something, and as I look back on it, that something was right in front of me. Acceptance. I tried to be perfect in every way imaginable, but, unfortunately, I only pushed away those I loved.
There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t think about you running around the backyard, or playing tennis with your father. I’m sorry for not being there, for not being a true mother. I only pray…yes, pray, that someday you’ll read this and you’ll have your own loving family.
God bless. I love you.
Mom
I thumbed a tear at the corner of my eye as Ezzy put a gentle hand on my shoulder.
“You okay?”
I nodded and released a breath. “She loved me. She only wanted me to be happy.”
“Indeed. I hope this brings closure.” She handed me a napkin, and I dabbed the corners of my eyes, my thoughts looking ahead. For some reason, it felt like the last invisible weight had been removed from my shoulders, allowing me to see a future, not just hope for one.
I looked out the window, then lifted from my chair and headed to the back door. Behind me, Ezzy said, “Go for it, Alex. I’m right there with you.”
I couldn’t help but smile as I jumped into the backyard, picked up the football, and started throwing it around with my two kids and Brad. After a while, the kids went back to showering each other with leaves. I took Brad’s hand, pulled him behind a tree, and shared the note with him.
“It’s amazing she wrote this note for you, not really knowing you’d ever get to read it.”
“I kind of wonder what’s in the first part, but yeah, I feel relieved.”
He hugged me and tenderly kissed my cheek. As he took a step back, I pulled him closer, gripping his T-shirt. I peered into his grayish-blue eyes.
“What, Alex?”
“I love you, Brad.” I could feel my chest heaving with deep breaths as our eyes locked. “I’m not fishing for you to say anything back, but I’ve wanted to tell you for a while. I guess I had to resolve a couple of things from my past.”
He brought me to his chest, and I could feel his heart pounding. His soft lips touched mine, instantly creating a shot of electricity racing through my body. Our tongues danced as he gripped my sides and held me tight. I lost myself in everything Brad. I had no idea how much time elapsed. Ten seconds, ten minutes? I finally came up for air, feeling lightheaded.
“Alex,” he said, his firm grip still on my waist. “I love you. I just didn’t know how to tell you.”
We touched foreheads while interlacing our fingers. The kids
played behind us, and I could hear Ezzy laughing as well.
They say you don’t get to choose your family. But through fate or divine intervention, I felt like I’d won the lottery. I was the luckiest girl on the planet.
ALSO BY JOHN W. MEFFORD
Redemption Thriller Series
The Alex Troutt Thrillers
Alex Troutt Thrillers: Books 1-3
Alex Troutt Thrillers: Books 4-6
AT Bay (Book 1)
AT Large (Book 2)
AT Once (Book 3)
AT Dawn (Book 4)
AT Dusk (Book 5)
AT Last (Book 6)
The Ivy Nash Thrillers
IN Defiance (Book 7)
IN Pursuit (Book 8)
IN Doubt (Book 9)
Break IN (Book 10)
IN Control (Book 11)
IN The End (Book 12)
The Ozzie Novak Thrillers
ON Edge (Book 13)
Game ON (Book 14)
ON The Rocks (Book 15)
Shame ON You (Book 16)
ON Fire (Book 17)
ON The Run (Book 18)
Note from the author:
Thank you for reading this trilogy of Alex Trout thrillers (book 4-6). I hoped you enjoyed all three novels. It would be great if you could leave a quick review on Amazon. I would appreciate it. Here’s the easy link: http://smarturl.it/ctipnz
Next In The Redemption Thriller Series – IN Defiance
She survived. But no one escapes their past.
A "system" kid no more, Ivy now fights for the wellbeing of children.
Even those implicated in murder?
With anguish and confusion centered on one child, how many will bear the scars of this turmoil?
The case becomes blurred. Accusations of abuse and drugs.
The authorities want it all to go away.
But Ivy can't -- won't -- let it go. It's about the kids. It always has been.
Evil knows no boundaries.
Childhood secrets erupt into the present, and Ivy's in the fight for her life.
IN Defiance is the first of the Ivy Nash Thrillers (Redemption Thriller Series #7). An excerpt is just below.
The Alex Troutt Thrillers: Books 4-6 (Redemption Thriller Series Box Set Book 2) Page 71
