My heart clambered up my throat and each thundering step behind me increased my arousal. By the time I skidded into the dining room, I was soaked.
Alex had gained on me as I navigated the previous rooms, and I knew all it would take was one misstep for him to catch me. God, how I wanted him to. I was considering tripping myself up, but it turned out I didn’t have to. The door leading to the next room was locked.
I was trapped.
I turned with my back to the closed door, panting. Alex stood on the other side of the table, bulge visible through his pants. I licked my lip.
“Nowhere left to run,” he said in a honey-thick voice.
Heat pulsed between my thighs. “That’s not entirely true.”
I vaulted around the table, trying to duck around him through the doorway. Alex snatched me up by my waist, lifting my feet off the ground with my back to his hard chest. He laughed triumphantly.
I squirmed in his arms, even as my body begged me to submit. He turned to the table and pushed me over it, grinding his bulge against my ass as his hot lips descended on my neck.
“Come on, Kitty Kat,” he purred, nipping my earlobe. “That’s all you got?”
I struggled, but all it did was push my ass into his bulge even more. He hummed with pleasure and held my arms tight to the table, sucking my throat.
That pushed me over. I couldn’t fight him anymore, not when my body sang with every touch of his mouth. I moaned and pushed my ass into him, my eyes fluttering closed.
“Tamara,” he murmured. “You’re so fucking hot.”
He stood but kept a hand on my back. The other reached around to undo my pants, stripping them down to my ankles. He cupped my pussy through my panties, rubbing just enough to make my knees shake. He removed his hand and I whimpered. Alex chuckled and pulled down my panties too. He lifted his hand from my back but grasped my hips instead. I looked around to see what he was doing just in time to see him squat down and press his face into my sex.
Alex’s tongue found my clit and swirled in a tight circle and my brain exploded.
“Oh god,” I whined.
He chuckled and the vibrations made my toes curl. His tongue lapped at me eagerly, hot and wet and perfectly soft. I rested my forehead against the cool wood, lost in ecstasy.
Alex stiffened his tongue and thrust it inside me. I cried out in surprise and pleasure, pushing back against his face as he fucked me with his tongue. But his tongue wasn’t enough. I needed his cock, I needed it more than anything. More than oxygen.
“Alex, please fuck me.” My voice came out ragged. “Fuck me right now.”
He pulled back, breath fanning my sex. “You’re demanding today.” His hand came down on my ass and the resulting sting was heavenly. “I like it.”
“I want to feel you bare,” I said, realizing he probably didn’t have any condoms on him and that I couldn’t wait for him to get one. I wouldn’t make it. “I’m on the pill.”
Alex growled his approval and stood up, bending over me and kissing my neck as he undid his belt. I heard his pants swish to the floor and he stood up, holding the back of my neck in one hand and squeezing my hip with the other. His foot kicked my legs a little further apart. I held my breath.
Alex speared inside of me. Hard. Fast. I screamed against the table, eyes rolling to the back of my head. He grunted and pulled out, then slammed inside again, releasing my neck and leaning down to bite into my shoulder.
We fucked like animals. It was rough. Brutal. Phenomenal. If my nails weren’t short, I would have left scratches in the table. Alex’s growling moans were louder than I’d ever heard them, and it turned me on so much I felt like crying.
Searing pleasure built in my core, winding tighter and tighter with every thrust. I lost all concept of time and space, only aware of the burn in my belly and the cock buried in my pussy. Tighter and tighter, hotter and hotter, until finally I came. My eyes screwed shut I screamed as the pleasure blasted me into oblivion.
For one perfect second, my mind was completely blank. I even forgot to breathe.
And then, gasping for air, I came back to earth.
Alex’s hands squeezed my hips and he thrust inside of me one last time with a strangled, primal cry. I felt his cock pulse, felt him shudder. Then he pulled out and flipped me over, covering my mouth with his before I could even let out a surprised yelp.
Alex held my face and kissed me hard and deep, even though both of us were still struggling to breathe. Something about the moment was more intimate than any we’d shared before. I buried my hands in his hair and kissed him back.
We came up for air a second later, and he looked me deep in the eyes.
The way he looked at me made my heart hurt. I saw his passion, his tenderness. I saw how much he loved to look at me and I saw how much he loved when I looked back.
What I didn’t see was the same pain that twisted through my gut like a jagged blade any time I remembered that this thing between us, this wonderful, beautiful thing, would soon turn to dust.
It had to. My visa would run out, or the factors that set us apart would become too much to manage, and we would end. Alex knew just as well as I did that our time was limited and every second we enjoyed together was just another second closer to us being torn apart, but he didn’t hurt from it in the same way I did.
If he did, I would see it. In his eyes, in the words he used, in the actions he took. But it didn’t seem to bother him at all. I couldn’t tell how he felt about me, except that he wanted me and he was used to getting what he wanted.
I couldn’t tell him that was what had made me distant lately. I could barely admit it to myself because it made me feel every bit the person Michael painted me to be in the tabloids. I shoved it away.
“Let me make you dinner,” Alex said. “I have to return you this evening, but we’ve got all day here.”
“Sure.” I plastered on a smile. “Uh, just let me gather myself together a little.” I shuffled my jean-encased feet and we both chuckled. “I’ll meet you in the kitchen in a minute.”
Alex adjusted his clothes and kissed me on the lips, then left for the kitchen. I pulled up my pants and found the nearest bathroom. I splashed cold water on my face before heading out again.
By the time I reached the kitchen, the smell of garlic filled the air and lifted my spirits. My stomach grumbled. It was still a little early for dinner, but we’d had a busy day and I hadn’t eaten anything since this morning.
“What are we having?” I asked when Alex’s back came into view, hunched over the stove.
He turned his head and smiled. “Nana has a knack for Italian. I’m going to attempt to make her famous Bolognese.”
“Attempt, eh?” I took a seat at the kitchen island.
“I’ve never made it before without her hovering over my shoulder with a wooden spoon to whack me for over seasoning,” he said with a laugh.
“I’m sure it’ll be delicious.”
Alex went back to working on the stove, humming something I couldn’t quite make out. He was in a fantastic mood. I tried to soak it in, knowing that my ennui was useless.
If I were stronger, I would end things with Alex and break my own heart, instead of having it broken for me. As it was, I was a sucker for punishment and knew that I’d walk this plank for the next month, no matter how much it hurt to see how unaffected he was. He never mentioned me leaving. One might think he didn’t even know.
If I was going to walk the plank anyway, I may as well have a good time, right?
So I watched Alex cook, and I ate his delicious food, and I staved off the unavoidable for another few hours.
CRASH!
“Uh-oh.”
“Don’t touch that!”
I sat up in bed, glaring blearily around the dark room. Nobody there. The noise had sounded near enough to be in my bedroom, but when I listened closer I realized the cacophony was coming from the living room.
No more crashing now, just giggling. I coul
d make out at least two distinct voices, and I knew one of them was my sister. I glanced at my phone on the bedside table. Four am.
Anger bubbled up in my chest and I shot out of bed, wrapping a robe around my shoulders and bursting into the living room.
Just as I expected, Jo’s hair was a tousled mess. Bloodshot eyes swiveled in my direction, but she hardly seemed to see me. The crashing noise had come from the shattered glass in the middle of the kitchen floor. Beside it, a lithe blonde girl crouched with a dustpan, while Teddy awkwardly tried to sweep the broken glass up with my broom.
Jo stood between them and me. When she saw me, her mouth split into a wide and hopeful grin. She knew how much shit she was in.
“Sorry for waking you up,” she slurred. “Issjusta glass.”
“We’ll have it cleaned up in no time!” cheered the blonde girl. I couldn’t tell whether she had an accent or was slurring her words.
“You’ve met Teddy,” Jo said, swinging her arm in his direction.
Teddy posed seductively with the broom, like it was a stripper pole and he was the star dancer. I would have found it funny if I weren’t so annoyed.
“This is Svetlana,” Jo introduced next. “She’s a Swedish princess. Can you believe that? I mean, she’s gorgeous obviously. I just mean when in your life have you met a Swedish princess?”
“It’s so nice to meet you!” Svetlana jumped to her feet and, making a wide berth around the broken glass, pranced over with her hand held out in greeting. “I’ve heard so much about you!”
I shook her hand, looking over to Jo, who’d taken up Svetlana’s spot on the floor to finish clearing the mess.
Svetlana kept talking, though her unfocused eyes wandered around the room. “You know, when Alexander first told me about you I wasn’t even surprised. He was distracted, totally distracted. You can always tell when a guy you’re with is thinking about another girl. Isn’t that sweet?”
I frowned, trying to decipher her words. “You know Alexander?”
Svetlana didn’t seem to hear me. She was calling back to Teddy, “Hey, can we get that thing? The thing you were talking about? Teddy? Teddy can we get it?”
“Darling if you’re talking about a deep-fried sausage, then I’ll gladly inform you that sausage is always on my mind.”
“Let’s go get it,” Svetlana said. “I’m starving.”
“And I’m drunk,” Jo added in a singsong voice. “I’ll see you guys on the flip side.”
Teddy and Svetlana cleared my flat before I had time to question the blonde further. But I had more pressing matters to attend to.
“Jo,” I said in a stern voice. “What the fuck?”
She slumped onto the sofa with a lax smile. “Sorry for waking you.”
“That’s not what I’m upset about.” I stuck my fists to my side. “Or at least not all of it. You can’t keep doing this.”
“Oh, Saint Tamara, here to save my soul,” she scoffed. “I’m just having some fun.”
Talking to her while she was wasted wasn’t going to get me anywhere, but I figured I could at least leave some parting words for her to chew over before I went back to bed.
“Get your act together,” I said. “I mean it. Tomorrow morning, take a good hard look in the mirror and ask yourself if this is the kind of person you want to be.”
I turned and walked toward my bedroom.
“The kind of person who has fun?” she shot back.
I paused in the doorway. “The kind of person who runs.”
Chapter 26
Alexander
The press attention had died down substantially in the weeks since Tamara and I made first page news, which made it a lot easier to sneak onto set to see her. That was advantageous, since she seemed to have been living there over the past few days as they wrapped up filming.
I was desperate to talk to her. Something felt off between us, even after our last trip to Springfield, and I hoped that it was my mind playing tricks on me. I knew she was busy, but it almost seemed like she’d been avoiding me.
I navigated through the busy back lot to her trailer with ease, clutching the bouquet of roses under my arm. I knew the way like the back of my hand. I knocked.
Something in the trailer moved and the door swung open. Tamara’s eyes flew open wide.
“Surprise!” I said, extending the flowers to her.
She smiled, but it was a tired, strained smile. It did little to dissuade my worries.
“You and that S word,” she said. “Come in.”
I followed her into the trailer and reached for her hand, stopping her mid-step. “Come here.”
Tamara turned and allowed me to tug her close, and as I enveloped her in my arms I felt her body relax. My free hand stroked the back of her head as my lips nuzzled into her neck.
“What’s wrong?” I murmured.
Tamara stiffened again. “Nothing.”
“It doesn’t feel like nothing.” I pulled back and looked at her, running my thumb down her soft cheek. “You don’t seem happy to see me.”
Tamara nibbled on her bottom lip and took the flowers from me, turning to grab a vase. “I’m busy. That’s all.”
“Bullshit, Tamara. Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.”
She dropped the flowers and slammed her palms against the table, staring at the opposite wall like it was the source of all her problems. “Figure it out, Alex.” She whipped around and glared at me. “The fact that you don’t know is part of the problem.”
I ran through a mental list of things I’d done, things that might have upset her, but came up short. What could she be mad at me for? And why couldn’t I remember it?
“If I’ve done anything to offend you—“
“Ugh!” she exclaimed, tossing her head back in fury. “Alex, this isn’t about you offending me. I’m leaving! I’ve got a flight booked and everything and you know that, yet you don’t even seem to care. Does it faze you at all? Or are you just going to move onto the next as soon as I’m gone?”
“Move onto the next?” I asked through gritted teeth. “I’m insulted that you would even think that way.”
“Well join the fucking club.” She crossed her arms and turned her lips down into a scowl. “I wasn’t even going to mention this because I didn’t want to ruin our last two weeks together, but while we’re at it let’s just get it out there that I know about your pretty Swedish girlfriend. You might not be with her now, but how long after I leave until that starts up again?”
I nearly laughed but it didn’t seem right for the situation.
“Svetlana is not my girlfriend. Nor will she ever be.”
“Why not?” Tamara stalked toward me, getting close enough that my hands itched to reach for her. “She’s beautiful. She’s a princess. That makes her, how did you put it? One of your own.”
“She’s a friend,” I said. “That’s it. Edward tried to set us up but neither of us are interested.”
“I’ll remember that when I read your wedding announcement.”
I opened my mouth to protest but Tamara spoke over me, anger lacing her words like poison.
“What are you even doing with me anyway? This was a bad idea. We could never work! I can’t believe I deluded myself into thinking we could.” She scrubbed her hands over her face and let out a frustrated groan. “Just go, Alex. I can’t do this anymore.”
“I’m not leaving until we sort this out,” I said, stepping toward her.
Tamara backed away and pointed to the door. “Get out before I call security. I mean it.”
“Tamara—“
“GET OUT!”
With a leaden heart, I turned to the door.
I found Nana in her office downstairs. She peered at the screen of her computer through thick reading glasses that distorted her eyes and made them look buggy and huge, which I’d always thought funny. Today I couldn’t find the humor in it.
“Alexander,” she said as I entered, pulling off the glasses and l
etting them hang by the string around her neck. “Is that for me?”
“It sure is.” I set the mug of tea down on her desk.
She smiled. “You’re a good boy.”
I couldn’t help but release an undignified snort. “I wish everyone thought so.”
Nana’s brows furrowed in consternation and she closed the lid of her laptop. She could always tell when I was genuinely upset, rather than just a little moody as I sometimes was. Especially when it started with me bringing her tea.
“Oh no, Alexander. Something’s happened with you and Tamara?”
I leaned my hip against the desk and crossed my arms. “You’ve got a sixth sense for these things, eh?”
“You look sad,” she said, pointing to my eyes with one gnarled finger. “When you fight with your brother, you get angry. When you don’t get your way, you get surly. When you lose something you care about, you get sad. So either your charity has bit the dirt or you’ve lost your girl.”
As always, her familiarity was refreshing. It even helped drive a small smile onto my face.
“I don’t know what to do, Nana,” I admitted. “Tamara chased me out of her trailer today. She doesn’t think there’s any point us continuing what we’re doing since she’s leaving, and she’s got this screwed up notion in her head that we could never work together anyway.”
Nana’s lips flattened. “Don’t act like she’s speaking nonsense, Alexander. You’re not a fool.”
“You don’t think we could work either?” I ran a hand through my hair. “Am I the only one who doesn’t see a problem here?”
“Seeing a problem doesn’t mean being beaten by it,” she replied. “Tamara sees a problem and can’t conceive you two overcoming it. And you won’t be able to overcome it if you don’t see the same problem.”
“You’re talking in riddles.”
“You’re not listening.”
I growled in frustration. “I’m trying to. What are you saying?”
Nana sat back in her chair and took a breath, folding her arms. When she spoke, she enunciated each word clearly. “What do you want to do, Alexander?”
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