by Rula Sinara
Dax ate the fig and began peeling a banana. He’d gotten back less than an hour ago. Finding the three of them napping together and seeing the twins’ puffy eyes had hit him hard. The twins had woken up, but he’d managed to get them out of the room without waking Pippa.
He owed her an explanation, if she’d listen. She deserved more credit than he’d given her before. He’d never met anyone with such grit and strength.
“I’m sorry that I fell asleep.”
He jolted as she came out of the bungalow. He quickly put his legs down to free the chair.
“No problem. They were actually still sleeping next to you when I got home.” Home. Since when was this home?
“Is that your new nanny?”
“Alim?” Dax chuckled. “Don’t let him hear you say that. He might have a heart attack. The twins do seem to have chipped away at his gruff exterior, though. I guess sometimes they use their powers for good.”
Pippa cracked a smile, but it was weak and a little sad. Dax leaned forward and pulled out the chair next to him.
“Please, sit down, Pippa. Give me a minute to explain.”
“I reacted badly yesterday,” she said, taking a seat. “What you do for a living is none of my business. I was just caught by surprise and...it’s not important. The point is I promised the girls I’d stay on as long as you need me to. For their sake.”
“Pippa. There are things I need to say. Things I need you to understand, and I want to explain while the girls are out of earshot.”
She picked at her nail, then tried to tuck her hair behind her ear, but the corkscrew lock sprang back out. He loved the way she flinched with irritation every time a lock of her hair did that. He loved her hair. It was perfect for her. Wild. A little unruly. Beautiful.
She reached for a banana from the fruit bowl Alim had brought out. Dax rested his elbows on the table. He didn’t want her to see him as the bad guy. He didn’t care what anyone else thought, but Pippa’s opinion mattered. It just did.
“I’ve lost a lot of people in my life. My parents announced they were getting a divorce right after I graduated from high school. Pretty much around the time my high school girlfriend broke up with me. Then my sophomore year in college, my best friend and his family were killed in the infamous South Asia quake and tsunami. That was a lot to deal with for a twenty-year-old.”
“That’s why you decided to study earthquakes?”
“Yes. I made that decision then and there. But then my junior year, I lost my first college girlfriend to an accident. I think that’s when I became obsessed with trying to protect people in my life and people in general. I eventually dated again and met Sandy. We got married as soon as I graduated from college. I was trying to create an unbroken family for myself. Something to hang on to. The thing is, Pippa, I lost my wife long before she got sick.”
Pippa frowned and cocked her head.
“You were divorced?”
“Legally separated, but we were headed for divorce. She left me almost a year before she was diagnosed. I wasn’t around enough. I wasn’t helping enough. I thought I was at the time, but I understand now what she meant. I wasn’t present. At least not the way she needed me to be. So she finally figured, why have me around at all? She was a lot like you. Environmental advocate. Nature loving. She told it straight, and she was almost always on target.
“I was only twenty-three when the twins were born. I don’t think I was emotionally ready for it. After all I’d been through, I felt it was my calling to try to figure out a way to protect Sandy, my kids and others out there. I was in academic research. Research geared toward earthquake prediction. I was working on my master’s when the twins were little. I was overwhelmed, so much so that I couldn’t see how much Sandy was carrying on her shoulders.
“But when I found out she was sick, I did go home. I halted my research and stayed in Texas to care for her and the twins. I didn’t leave her side for six months while she went through treatment. In her last days, she said that she loved me. That she forgave me. That all she wanted in order to die peacefully was to know that I would never leave the twins again. She didn’t want them losing both their parents, which is what she said would happen if I tried to deal with her death by burying myself in work the way I had dealt with death before.
“I didn’t deserve her forgiveness, but I kept that promise. I began doing contract work in the oil industry. Working for oil companies meant earning a lot more than I ever could in research. Sandy’s medical bills had piled up because I didn’t have good insurance, not with the minimal funds I had for research. I needed a steady job to pay those bills, take care of the twins and always have them near me. That, Pippa Harper, is why I’m here working for Erebus. Not because I want to. Because I have to.”
* * *
PIPPA’S EYES BURNED with tears. For him. For the girls. Her chest tightened. She was ashamed with herself for assuming he was just a man after the highest-paying job. She swiped her nose with a napkin and bit her lip as she looked off toward the girls in the tree. Whatever high branch Pippa had been hanging on all this time, she felt as if the tree under her had just been chopped down.
“I’m so sorry, Dax. I’m an idiot for thinking the worst of you.”
“You’re not an idiot,” he said, shaking his head. “You couldn’t have known. I’m the one at fault for keeping Erebus from you. I was so desperate for help that when I found out how active you and your family were in protecting wildlife and the environment, I figured you’d peg me as the enemy, as you put it, and you wouldn’t consider watching my kids. I admit that. But that was only at the beginning. Things changed after that and I knew I needed to tell you the truth. I just didn’t know how. I was afraid we wouldn’t see you anymore. I can’t be more honest with you than that.” His face flushed a little.
Pippa picked at her thumbnail. If life hadn’t unfolded this way, she wouldn’t be sitting here with Dax at this moment. She wanted to take his hand in both of hers and make him understand that she wished all his pain could go away. But she didn’t dare.
She glanced at Ivy and Fern. No wonder they acted the way they did. They had probably learned to act out in order to get what they wanted from each parent when Sandy and Dax were apart. And then they’d lost their mother and began focusing on trying to earn the attention of the only parent they had left. That’s why they had started testing everyone to see who they could count on to stay and not abandon them. They had so much in common with their dad.
“I guess you’re right about the fact that I might not have helped you, had I known about Erebus. I’d have missed out on a lot,” she said.
He smiled and looked at the girls laughing with Alim.
“We’d have missed out,” he said, looking back at her.
She cocked her head at him and this time she didn’t look away.
“Thank you for that,” she said.
“Can I trust you?”
“Of course,” she said. Where was this going?
“I need you to know something else.” He cleared his throat, braced his hands together on the table, then exhaled, as if deciding whether what he was about to say would be a mistake. “I’m telling you this in confidence. You need to keep it to yourself because it relates to my work.”
“Okay.” She frowned and shifted her chair closer to the table.
“I haven’t lost my moral boundaries, Pippa. I swear. I may be working for Erebus, but I’m not going to cower if I see something wrong or if I suspect dangerous activity.”
“You’re telling me this because you already suspect a problem.”
“Yes.”
Pippa let out a breath. She knew it. Ever since the company had gotten clearance to drill using fracking methods, she knew no good would come of it. There had to be a link between what they were doing and an increase in tremors in the area. Her gut told her they were also responsible for the sic
k children in the Maasai villages. She didn’t care if Erebus had been cleared in the past of wrongdoing. Something was going on.
“Dax, is what they’re doing increasing seismic activity? Are your instruments actually picking it up? Do you know if what they’re doing could contaminate underground water supplies? Could—”
He put his hand on her forearm to stop her.
“Back up. What are you saying? Has there been water contamination in the area? You know this for sure?”
“Only suspicions. A couple of years ago, in a village not far from the drill site, my aunt who’s a doctor noticed an increase in child illnesses in nearby villages. This was after Erebus got the green light to drill and began fracking shortly after that.”
“I wasn’t with them at that point.”
“I know.”
“We tested the village wells for contamination. One tested positive for elevated metals, only that got brushed off as a result of normal tremor activity. And, trust me, it all got reported through the proper channels. Apparently, they’d had an inspection and their wells weren’t compromised. At least that’s what the reports said. But recently, while teaching, some of the women told me about issues creeping up again. I sent samples back to my aunt. I don’t know the results yet. I’ve been feeling tremors, though. I didn’t used to. At least not this often, and I’ve been here all my life.”
“Did you feel a tremor today?” he asked.
“No. Why? Did you?”
Dax nodded and scratched the day-old stubble that shaded his jaw.
“The company is fracking very close to faults, and that makes me cringe. Even without faults, I’m against it. Not only is the risk of groundwater contamination too high, it uses a lot of water—anywhere from hundreds of thousands of gallons to millions of gallons per well.”
“That’s unreal,” she said.
“And when you look at a place like this, with a drought plaguing the region and people’s farms and livelihood affected, it’s also sickening,” he said “I’ve seen an increase in seismic activity in the data. I’ve felt it, so I do think it correlates to Erebus’s fracking. I had been taking readings for my own records and research—not initially because of Erebus or anything like that—but my crew and I saw correlations. I told the chief engineer today. He said he’ll pass it on to his superiors. Not sure I trust him though, so I plan to look into it more myself. Especially with what you’re saying about possible water contamination.”
Pippa couldn’t believe it. He was on the sly? And here the twins said he didn’t like mysteries.
“Wow. Did the twins by any chance inherit their gift for sneakiness from you?”
He waggled his brows and chuckled, as he let go of her arm. She wished he hadn’t.
“Probably. I guess that means if you can handle them, you can handle the likes of me.”
They both froze, and color rose up the back of his neck and clear to his forehead.
“I totally did not mean to imply that I had any interest in a—”
“Of course not.”
“I mean, I do...or would...but—”
“But I’m not your type. I get it. You’re not mine, either.”
“I know I’m not, but Pippa, for the record, you are my type.”
“I am?” Goose bumps trailed down her arms and right through her henna tattoos.
“Yes. And I can’t deny there’s something happening between us, but...” he started.
There was a but. Why did there always have to be a but in her life?
“I messed up a relationship once, Pippa. I can’t go through that or put anyone else, or the twins, through that again. We won’t be here after this contract is over. It wouldn’t make sense to explore what this is between us. Not when I have to consider the twins. I don’t want them hurt. They’re already attached to you. If they got their hopes up that you’d always be in their lives, only to find out it couldn’t happen, it would devastate them.”
Pippa was still stuck on the fact that he had been feeling something between them, too. She wasn’t crazy.
“A lot of things don’t make sense. Not everything has to be logical or have a scientific explanation to make sense. I love your daughters. I wouldn’t want to see them hurt either,” she said.
She did love the twins, but she was afraid to feel anything that strong for Dax. Maybe she was using the twins as an excuse to back away. Maybe they both were. Even if she did feel something for him, admitting it would be stupid. He’d just made it clear that exploring this tug between them couldn’t happen. She was not going to pursue a man who didn’t think she was worth the risk of jumping into the unknown...of facing the unexpected.
You’re so...unexpected.
His words rang in her ears. She needed to get up. It was time for her to leave.
“Some things do have to make sense,” he said.
“You’re right. I totally agree. I’m glad that’s out in the open so we’re clear on how things stand. I’ll focus on watching the girls, and you deal with finding out what you can at work about the minor quakes we’ve been having. If my aunt finds out anything about contamination in the water wells, I’ll share it with you, too.”
“So, we’re okay?”
How dense could he be? Time to move on. She stood up and put on a composed face.
“We’re totally okay.”
CHAPTER TEN
PIPPA SAT CROSS-LEGGED across from Ivy and Fern on the handwoven blanket they had spread out on the ground just outside their bungalow. In the center of the basket lay a wooden bowl filled with tiny beads in various colors, and another one with slightly larger ones. She cut a strand of thin wire and proceeded to string it with tiny beads, as the girls did the same.
“I love doing this,” Ivy said, running her fingertips through the glass beads before picking one out. “Feels like sand.”
“Mmm-hmm. Melt sand and you make glass.” Pippa didn’t falter in the rhythm of her stringing as she spoke.
“Really?” Fern swirled her fingers in the bowl.
“Yes, but it’s seriously hot stuff. Nothing you’ll be doing on a stovetop.”
“Why do the Maasai love wearing so many colorful beads?” Ivy asked.
“Yeah. I wondered that, too,” Fern said, picking a blue bead and threading it.
“They wear them to show many things, including the strength of the bearer, the stage of life he or she is at, such as warriorhood or marriage. They make wide necklaces, or collars, that go from their neck down to their chest for a bride, and the way the beads are strung represents their dowry, which in most cases involves cows.”
The girls giggled. Pippa smiled, but she thought of Adia and felt relieved that she wouldn’t be wearing such a necklace anytime soon.
“They occasionally also give the jewelry as a gift to show gratitude.”
“Have your friends ever given you beaded jewelry?” Fern asked.
“I’ve gotten a few over the years, and each one is special to me.” She eyed the twins’ handiwork and smiled. “You two are naturals. I have an idea if you want to make a gift for your dad. You can take both of your strands and make a double-strand bracelet. It’s like a friendship bracelet, only it’ll represent the two of you being with him, always.”
The girls’ eyes widened.
“Show us how to combine the ends,” Fern said. Ivy held her strand out in agreement. Pippa helped them twist their ends together and had them choose a medium-sized bead to cover the knot.
“Have you ever felt your pulse in your wrist?” Pippa asked them. They shook their heads. She set down her work and demonstrated where to press their two fingers between bone and tendon. “Feel that?”
“Yes! Cool,” Ivy said.
“That’s your pulse. The beat of your heart.” Much like sensing a tremor far from the epicenter of a quake, Pippa tho
ught. “When you tie this bracelet around your father’s wrist, it’ll be right up against his pulse.”
“Can we make more?” Fern asked, as they finished the ends of the bracelet and lay it down on the blanket before them.
“Sure. I promised that you’d have fun if you passed your vocabulary and spelling tests. I keep my promises.” Pippa went to work completing her necklace strand.
She heard the rustle of a branch and all three looked up. Alim was setting a plate at a small table and chairs in the shade. He caught them watching, grumbled and walked away, leaving the dish. Ivy jumped up and ran over.
“He left us those triangle doughnuts!”
“Mandazi,” Pippa said.
“Mandazi,” the girls repeated.
“Did he really leave them for us?” Fern asked, taking a bite out of one before the answer came.
“I believe he did.”
“Why is he so grumpy all the time?”
“Well, he doesn’t really talk about it, but one of the other hotel staff members once told me that he’d lost his wife and kids in an accident.”
“Is that why he never smiles around us? Do you think we remind him of his kids?” Ivy asked.
“Any child probably reminds him of the ones he lost. Sometimes adults can feel bitter about things. Like wondering why someone else has something we don’t.”
Like why Maddie and Haki have each other.
The thought made her uncomfortable. Was she jealous? All this time, she’d chalked her emotions up to pain. But pain and bitter jealousy were two different things. She didn’t want to be jealous. It was such a greedy emotion. She’d always been openhearted and genuinely happy for others.
She kept stringing as the girls snacked on the pastries. The beading was therapeutic. The rhythm and monotony was meditative.
Finished with their treat, the twins wiped their hands and rummaged through the bowl for more beads.
“You know, we could make jewelry like this when we’re back home in America, and sell it in the neighborhood or online, if Dad lets us,” Ivy said.
An entrepreneur.
