“BLOODY HELL!” Tannya yelled in shock. “Did you see that?” She asked and started laughing nervously.
“Oh, fuck! That was scary!” I said.
“Shit, we almost lost our feet,” Miss Kitty said stunned.
“Arrr, both of you use your pirate voices!” Tannya scolded.
“Wow, we should go see where that went,” I said, staring off in the direction the cannonball had flown.
“I’m sure it’s in the field across the county road,” Miss Kitty said. I hoped she was right. I knew there were no houses over that way, and I didn’t hear any tires squeal so hopefully we didn’t hit any cars.
The smoke cloud slowly faded as we stood there looking at each other. “That was so cool! We should do it again, but this time let’s tip it down a bit so it doesn’t go so far,” Miss Kitty said.
“Aye,” Captain Tytass said and nodded to us.
She stood there and watched as Miss Kitty and I rolled the cannon back up to the door and repositioned it. Then we tipped it down a bit.
“I think we should wait a few minutes before we try again. It’s still hot, and don’t we have to clean it out, too?” I asked.
“Oh, barnacles, I forgot about that!” Tannya said. “Fine. Crew, sit and rest a bit. We’ll fire again in ten minutes.”
We sat there talking about how cool it was and how much crazy fun we were having. My phone rang. I pulled it out of my pocket. It was Aunt Val. Shit. I was busted.
“Hello?”
“Soooo, what’s new?” she asked in a stretchy voice.
“Nothing … what’s new with you?” I asked in the same way.
“Seriously, I’m on the ship, and Captain Caesar Wayde is next to me, and we can see one … Ella Vashow … on the water.”
I laughed out loud. “Okay, fine! You caught us. We’re on our pirate ship, and we’re trying out our new cannon, too. We all thought it sounded fun and wanted to join in the game.”
“So, you girls are your own group? You’re not with Ocean’s Lie?”
“Yup, we’re our own group! I’m Sara Narra, and there’s Candee Barre, and Captain Tannya Tytass,” I said with a proud grin.
I heard her repeat that quietly to someone on her end. Then I heard a male’s voice respond, “Tell ’em to go home! That’s an order!” I put the phone on speaker and the girls came closer to listen in.
Val came back on the line. “Um, Captain would prefer if you guys would not be part of this. He has plenty of concern already with the others here and doesn’t want you guys to get caught in the middle of it,” she said gently.
“Screw him and his orders!” Tannya said in a loud pirate voice. “I’m captain of this ship, and I say when we’re done. You can tell Captain Caesar Wayde of Poseidon’s Zebra Mussel that we won’t give up without a fight! We’re coming for your treasure!”
“Did you catch that?” I asked Val.
“Yes. I have you on speaker. Captain heard it.”
“Then this is war!” he yelled into the phone. The line went dead.
I stuck the phone back in my pocket, and we all busted out laughing. “He’s so funny! He’s way better at this than we are. He’s been in costume all week and built his ship by hand. He’s really in to this.”
“That makes him crazy, and us fast and efficient. We pulled this together in a matter of two days!” Miss Kitty bragged.
“She’s right,” Tannya said and stood on the seat in front of the driver’s console. She had her chest out and fist in the air. “We are the unstoppable trio of Ella Vashow!” she yelled at the top of her lungs. “No one can stop us now!” Just as she said the last word there was a loud BOOM!
It was Poseidon’s cannon. BONG! The pontoon shook, and we all ducked down. Something had hit the boat! I looked up and saw that the pole the sun cover was attached to had completely broken lose. It was just dangling there. The sun cover was bent over from its own weight and now sitting on the sundeck.
“WHAT THE FUCK?” I shouted. “Is he firing at us? Like for real?”
“BLOODY HELL!” Tannya yelled. “Load the cannon, crew! We’re firing back!”
“What’s going on? I thought this was for fun?” Miss Kitty asked. “SEE, THAT GUY’S CRAZY!”
“Are you kidding me?” I asked. I was pissed. “Look what he did! He broke my fucking boat!” I paced in the two-foot area available to me, which was making me dizzy. Anger and rage were building. Now I was mad! “Reload the cannon!” I said and started the motor.
I yanked up the anchor and slowly turned the boat around. I felt my phone vibrate and quickly pulled it out. It was Val again. I put her on speaker and killed the motor.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS DOING?” I screamed into the phone.
“Oh, my God, Sara! Are you guys okay? I had no idea he would fire at you for real. He’s lost it. He’s crazy! I don’t know what’s going on. I thought this was for fun. Now I’m scared. I’m below deck and he’s telling First Mate Willy to reload. This is not what I thought it was.”
“Who’s this Willy? Is he going along with him? Is he crazy too?” I asked.
“I don’t know. Willy will do anything for Captain. He has no life and is at his beck and call all the time. He’s a doofus, very nice looking younger guy, but a total doofus. He’s from the area. He spends most of his time here and only goes home to sleep.”
“What’s his real name?”
“Scooter … something … it’s really stupid-sounding … I can’t remember.”
I looked up. Tannya and Miss Kitty did too. We were all thinking it. “Scooter Potter?” Tannya said into the speaker.
“Yes! That’s it!”
Tannya pressed her eyebrows together and lowered her voice. “RELOAD!”
“Oh, God!” Miss Kitty said and covered her mouth.
“Why?” Val asked.
“Oh, shit!” I said as I watched Tannya throw a powder packet in and ram it down, and then a ball. She cut a fuse and stuck that in too. She looked at the ship and tipped the nose of the cannon down so it was almost a straight shot.
“Tannya’s gonna fire! TAKE COVER!” I yelled into the phone. Miss Kitty and I moved to the far end of the boat and ducked. Tannya lit the fuse and ran over by us.
“Shit, Tannya! My aunt is on that ship!”
“BOOM!” I watched as the cannonball flew at the ship.
“Hello?” I said into the phone. “HELLO? AUNT VAL?” The line was still open.
“I’m okay!” she said. I could hear voices and a commotion in the background. I waited and shot Tannya a look.
“Are you crazy?” I yelled at her.
“Scooter’s on the ship, too! It’s going down!” she said with a fist pump. “RELOAD!”
I looked at Miss Kitty. She was standing there in shock, but looked slightly amused.
“We are not reloading!” I said firmly.
“Sara! We’ve been hit!” Val said through the speaker. “The cannonball brushed the port side, there’s a small hole. We’re taking on water. It’s a small hole and it’s not much water but I can hear them talking about fixing right now. This will buy me time. Come and get me! I want off this ship. Quickly, while they’re distracted.”
“Are you sure? I thought you liked Wayde?”
“I did, until earlier this week when he went crazy! He’s not the same guy. Hello, he just tried to kill you!” she reminded me.
We’d just tried to kill them, too, but I was not about to point that out. “Okay, I’m on my way.”
I started the engine and drove full throttle towards the Poseidon. We were moving, but very slowly because of the weight in the boat, and the cannon placement didn’t help. “Girls, go move the cannon back to the middle of the boat.”
“That’s Captain Tytass!” Tannya said.
“Yeah, and Candee Barre!” Miss Kitty reminded me.
I shot them a stern look. I was still pissed and not about to put up with their game or crap. We neared the ship, and Tannya gave me the finger ov
er the lips signal. I slowed the motor and could see Aunt Val on deck. She waved at us and looked over her shoulder. Then she pointed down to a rope ladder that she’d thrown over the side. I motored quietly over to it. Tannya got up to grab the ladder and hold the boat steady, or so I thought. Actually, she grabbed onto the ladder and started climbing up the rope.
“What the hell are you doing? I whispered loudly.
“She was four rungs up already and hauling ass up the rope. She turned back and said, “I’m the captain, and we’re boarding this ship. It’s a mutiny! We’re taking the aunt and the treasure!” She climbed higher. “This boat is taking on water. Get on here and get a look around before it sinks. When’s the next time you get to see a pirate ship? Come on you scallywags, let’s go!”
“She’s right!” Miss Kitty said with a bunch of nods. “We’re never going to get this chance again! I’m going!” She grabbed the rope and looked up at Tannya, who was on deck. Tannya gave her a hurried wave and looked behind her.
“Hurry!” she said quietly.
I killed the motor and went to grab the rope. “Fine! FINE! I guess I’ll just stay with the ship then, CAPTAIN!” I yelled quietly up at her. Damn it! I wanted to go too, but someone had to hold the pontoon.
I looked up and saw Miss Kitty just getting to the top and then Aunt Val said, “We’ll be right back.” They disappeared from my sight. I sat there rocking on the pontoon for what seemed like hours, but was probably only five minutes or so. Finally I heard Miss Kitty.
“Hey!” she whispered loudly. “Catch!” She dropped down a medium-size package. I caught it. It was maybe five to ten pounds in weight and the size of a large backpack. It was wrapped in thick, black plastic and had a ton of tape around it. “Here!” she yelled again. And tossed another, and then another. Pretty soon the pontoon was full of plastic packages, each slightly different in shape and size and weight. All three were throwing them at me.
“Okay! That’s enough! We’re running out of room! Let’s get out of here!”
Miss Kitty came down first. “That was so exhilarating!” she told me with a huge grin. I stuck my jealous tongue out at her.
“I bet it was. Hold the ladder!” I said and went to start the motor. Aunt Val came down next. “Thanks, Sara! I owe you another one!” she said and gave me a hug.
“You sure do!” I said with a smile. She sat in the back next to the broken table and looked around. “It’s a fixer-upper,” I said with a wink. “Is this all of the treasure?”
“No, there’s more. This is the stuff he just loaded today that he’s been so protective of. These packages are a bit smaller, and he hadn’t weighted these yet. I figured they’d be the easiest to steal. Everything else is in crates and weighted.
Tannya was just starting down the ladder. We looked up when we heard voices and yelling. Tannya went up one rung and looked over the edge. “OH, SHIT! THEY’RE COMING!” she started moving faster down the ladder. I was scared for her. She was not the most graceful lady.
“Hurry!” I yelled up to her.
“Tannya?” A man’s voice yelled. Two male pirates where leaning over and looking down at us. “Hey!”
“Do you know her?” asked the older one, who I assumed was Captain Caesar.
“Yes! She’s my wife!”
“EX-WIFE, you jackass! You ruined our marriage two years ago!”
“What the hell are you doing?” Scooter, the first mate Willy, asked.
“It’s a mutiny, dumb ass. I’ve got your wench and your treasure!” She laughed as she stepped onto the pontoon. “AND I shot your ship!”
“Thieves!” Wayde yelled. “Get ’em!” I was already motoring away. When I got turned around I opened it up, and we putted slowly back towards the house.
“Do they have any guns?” Miss Kitty asked.
“I don’t think so,” Val said. “But I guess I can’t know for sure.”
Tannya got up and started loading the cannon again. “This is our last one. We need to go back for more balls.” I thought so too. Better safe than sorry.
The sun was moving behind the trees. It was a little after five. Tannya’s newest orders were to go to the dock, get more cannonballs loaded up, and grab some drinks. As soon as I stopped at the dock Miss Kitty ran in and got the cider, the Schnapps and our mugs, plus one more for Val. Val held the pontoon while Tannya and I loaded three more cannonballs on.
“That’s all?” Val said looking in the empty box.
Miss Kitty was just climbing aboard, arms full. “I figured six was enough.” She shrugged and then set the stuff on the seats. She got busy mixing drinks, and then we all toasted.
“If I may,” Captain Tytass started. “I’ve always said, if your ship doesn’t come in, you got to swim out to that bitch and steal your treasure, but this, my wenches, was beyond the fun that my civilian mind could have ever imagined.” She shook her head and paused. “To us women! May the past pirates, that are no longer with us, look down on us with pride! I will forever remember this day with you, my closest friends!” She lifted her mug and we followed suit.
“Cheers!” We all said and clanked mugs. Then we decided to shift the treasure to the back of the ponton. Miss Kitty and Val moved it, while Tannya and I tried to tear down the rest of the awning. After we completely destroyed it we threw it up on the dock. That’s when I noticed the three men in my yard just coming through the trees by the raft.
“Ocean’s Lie!” I said quietly. Miss Kitty and Val stopped dead in their tracks, both holding packages. “Get down!” I whispered.
We all squatted on the floor of the pontoon and watched them. They were carrying boxes into their raft. They were all in full pirate uniform. “That’s my treasure!” Tannya said. “Those assholes used me! They never even called!”
The three men all set their boxes in the raft and then disappeared in to the trees again.
“Quick, get the boxes!” Tannya said and took off running down the dock. We all stood there in shock. She turned around and whispered, “That’s an order!”
“I’ll stay with the boat,” I said when the other two looked at me. They quickly followed Tannya, who stepped into the raft and handed them each a box and then took the last one. They ran back to us and put the boxes in the back of the pontoon. I pulled the bent pole and table out of their hole and set it quietly on dock next to the awning. We heard voices again.
“Start the motor, they’re coming!” Aunt Val said nervously.
“Let’s get out of here!” Miss Kitty said from the floor. She was ducking down to hide. I started the motor and bolted out of there. Except that with the now even heavier weight, we were going about twelve miles per hour.
We looked back at Ocean’s Lie. The pirates were just coming through the trees, each carrying another box. They stopped short and were talking and looking around. They knew they were robbed! We were about 100 yards from them. I pulled the throttle back into neutral and idled there.
“That’s right, boys!” Tannya yelled at them. “Captain Tannya Tytass got you! Can you say mutiny?” Then she turned to us with a grin and told us, “I love that word.”
“We noticed,” I said, not pointing out that it was the wrong word.
“THIEVES!” Captain Morgan yelled. “They’ve stolen our treasure.”
“It’s my treasure! You used me. Well, guess what, I used you! Now I’m captain of this boat! We have a boat, too. You don’t even have a boat! We have all the treasure! We’re the winners!” she yelled. She stood up on the seat. “YES! We win! We are the winners!” She was so loud and proud. I had never seen her so excited. I knew she got excited easily, but this was over the top, even for her. I was happy for her … well happy for us. But I was still pissed about the awning.
Tannya reached down and grabbed her mug and again toasted. “To us, winning! It’s the all-girl power hour! We are the WINNERS! We are one Ella Vashow! WOO HOO!” she screamed at the top of her lungs. It echoed around the lake. The rest of us laughed at her enthus
iasm. We were watching her and didn’t notice that meanwhile Ocean’s Lie had pushed their raft out on to the water and had started paddling towards us.
“What are they going to do? Chase us down with paddles?” Miss Kitty laughed.
A phone rang. We all looked at each other. It was Aunt Val’s. “It’s Wayde,” she said, looking at the screen.
“Answer it,” Tannya said. She looked tough, like she wasn’t afraid of anything. I slammed my drink and Miss Kitty and Tannya did the same.
“Hello,” she answered and turned the speaker on.
“Val,” he said in a nice, normal voice. “Look, I don’t know what you’re doing, but you need to bring that treasure back now! I need it. This isn’t about the game, okay? It’s very important to me, and I don’t want you to get wrapped up in this mess.” Val looked at us, confused.
“What mess?” Val started, but Tannya grabbed the phone away from her and yelled into it. “I’m the captain of this ship and Val is my prisoner. If you have a problem, you take it up with me!” Then she hit the off button and handed it back to Val with a firm nod.
We looked over at Ocean’s Lie. They were about half a football field from shore and headed back towards land. “Wonder what they’re up to,” Miss Kitty said. “They gave up pretty easily for coming all this way and dressing up that much. Seems like a waste to just walk away now.”
“Giving up, boys?” Tannya yelled. “That’s right, back to the real world for you! Your game is over!”
“Arrr!” Flying Dutchman yelled. “Ye be mighty brave, but we got treasure left.”
“What’s that, a few more boxes of gold garage sale junk?” Tannya mumbled.
“Hey, some of that stuff wasn’t junk!” Miss Kitty said. I stuck my leg out and kicked her.
When Ocean’s Lie got back up on land, all three men disappeared into the woods again.
“Let’s fire the cannon again!” I jumped. I’d scared myself with my own voice. Well, not my voice, but my dark side’s voice. I loved the heart pounding excitement of the cannon. Miss Kitty got up and cut a fuse and stuck it in the hole.
Destroyed and Detained : Sara Martin Series Page 15
