Gradually she became aware of someone sitting right behind her, holding her hair out of the way and stroking her back. Her bear wasn’t protesting, and the movement was soothing. She wiped at her eyes and mouth before turning to see Felix watching her with concern.
“You okay?” he asked, handing her a bottle of water.
She took the bottle and sipped at it, allowing it to cool her raw throat. He handed her a tissue, and she wiped at her eyes.
“Sara? Are you okay?” he repeated.
Numbly, she shook her head. No, she was not okay, not even a little bit. Nothing about this situation was okay, and she doubted she’d ever be okay again. Tears streamed down her face, and there was no holding them back. Her emotions had burst through her control and she couldn’t rein them back in. She sobbed noisily, gulping in air, and her whole body shook.
“Hey,” Felix said, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her in close. Surprisingly, her polar bear allowed it, and she leaned into him, accepting the comfort he offered. He held her as she cried, his arms warm and reassuring. With her face pressed into his chest, she could hear the comforting thump of his heartbeat and breathe in his wonderful scent. She felt him press a gentle kiss on the top of her head, and her heart broke.
This man, this lion shifter, was everything she could possibly want in a mate. Felix was her true mate, and she was supposed to be with him. Instead, she was broken and mated to a piece of scum that her bear would never let her escape. It had to be possible to break away since Alex’s father had left his mother for a true mate. The situation was different, but it had happened. There had to be a way. She snuggled in closer to Felix. “I don’t know how to fix this,” she mumbled.
“We’ll find a way,” Felix said, nuzzling her hair. “I’ll go eat Ryan, if you like. Although it might be safer if we let Katie or Ethan do it. They’ll never stop pouting if we don’t let them eat someone soon.”
A giggle escaped, startling her. She had never felt less like laughing and yet Felix still managed to make it happen. Apparently he knew about her situation with Ryan. It didn’t surprise her. Too many people already knew, and it had only been a matter of time before someone talked.
He sighed. “We have to find a way to let your bear out, sweetheart. I know it’s dangerous, but we’ll have to think of something. It’s the only way you’ll keep control.”
“I know,” she sniffed. “I’m just worried she’ll either try to get to Ryan, or else hurt someone.” She dabbed at her eyes with the soggy tissue. “I’m not really in control of her, even in this form. If I let her out, I think she might take over completely.” She paused for a moment. “I hate her,” she whispered.
“She’s part of you,” Felix pointed out. “Part of who you are.”
“Yeah well, maybe I hate me too,” she sighed. “I’ve never been able to control her well, so maybe I’m just weak. I was the idiot who bit Ryan…”
“In self-defence,” Felix pointed out. “It doesn’t count.”
“Tell that to the bear,” she said sadly. “I wish I’d taken after my mum and become a mouse shifter. Why did I have to be the polar bear with a lousy temper?”
“Can your dad control his polar bear?” Felix asked.
“Unless you make him really mad,” Sara said. “He’d lose it if anyone hurt his family, but most of the time, his control is perfect.” She’d only seen her father lose his temper a few times, and always in response to someone threatening his wife or children. Usually, he was defending Sara’s sister, Kara.
“So, maybe it’s not about you being a polar bear,” Felix suggested.
“You mean it’s more a problem of me being a temperamental bitch?” she asked. “Gee, thanks. That makes me feel a lot better.”
“Not what I meant and you know it,” Felix answered. “I just meant that maybe it’s your human side who has a few issues.”
“Can’t you have a few issues?” Sara complained. “It would make this easier if you had a few flaws.”
There was silence.
“Felix?”
“Still thinking.”
She sighed. “Never mind.”
She felt herself relaxing in his arms, the first time she’d felt at ease in a long time. There was safety here, protectiveness and caring. Her polar bear yawned and settled down to sleep. Sara blinked in surprise. The bond between her and Ryan was still there, but it was weaker somehow, no longer exerting the same pull on her. Was it fading?
She pushed away from Felix to look at his face. “I feel his bond weakening,” she said.
The grin that spread over Felix’s face could light up a room. “Awesome! You know what that means, right?” he asked her. “The way to deal with this is more snuggle time with Felix.”
Honestly? That didn’t sound so bad.
Chapter 6
“We need to deal with her ex,” Felix insisted. He stood in Alex’s office. One wall had an enormous hole from where someone had tried to blow up Alex. It still hadn’t been repaired and Alex stubbornly refused to move to another room, claiming that he wouldn’t give anyone the satisfaction of chasing him out of his own office.
Alex sighed, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. “What do you suggest I do? He’s in Wolfton, not Bearbank. And even if he was here, there’s nothing I can do. There’s been no complaint made, so I can’t arrest him.”
“I thought we could deal with it shifter-style,” Felix suggested. “Maybe-”
“No.” Alex held up a hand to stop him. “Whatever you’re about to say, just don’t. I’m a cop, remember? If you tell me what you’re going to do, I will be legally obliged to stop you. Then if anything happens to the man, I’ll have to arrest you. So tell me nothing.”
Felix stared at him. “So, you’re not saying I shouldn’t do something, only that I shouldn’t tell you?”
Alex glared at him. “I’m saying nothing about anything. I am definitely not suggesting that you speak with my mother.”
“But I never said anything about your mother-”
“Neither did I,” Alex said, staring him down. “No one is mentioning my mother. Let’s leave it that way.”
Then why did Alex bring it up? Were all bears this weird?
“Dude,” Leo whispered to him. “Go talk to his mother.”
“But he said -”
Leo gave an exaggerated sigh. “He’s telling you to go talk to his mother without actually telling you to talk to his mother. That way he doesn’t have to arrest anyone.”
“Oh.” Oh, right. Felix considered it. “I’d prefer he didn’t arrest me.”
Leo snorted. “He’d arrest you quite happily, but there’s no way he’s bringing in his mother.”
Felix shrugged. He nodded his thanks to Alex and left his office, waving to Ethan on his way out. Now he just had to find Anna Russell.
***
“So you want this rabid polar bear dealt with?” Anna Russell asked him. She stood facing him, expression stern, and her arms folded.
For the first time, Felix experienced a little apprehension around the woman. He nodded cautiously.
“I wondered when anyone would think to ask me for help,” Anna said, shaking her head. “It’s only my job, after all.”
“I thought you were retired,” he said, flinching at the look she gave him. “Although you don’t look old enough to retire, of course,” he added quickly.
“You never really retire from the Shifter Agency,” she said. “Once an agent, always an agent.”
“I thought that was the marines,” Felix said, frowning in confusion.
Anna sighed, looking up at the ceiling. People did that a lot around Felix. He could never work out why.
“It’s the same with the Shifter Agency,” she told him. “I’d like to help, Felix.” Her eyes softened as she looked at him. “I feel for that girl, I really do, and I would love to get my hands on that man.”
It didn’t sound like she was
going to help.
“But?” he asked. There was definitely a ‘but’, he could hear it coming.
She sighed again. “But the request has to come from Sara herself. If she asks me to deal with him, I will. This is her problem since the man is her mate. She has to make the decision to do something about it.”
Felix growled in frustration, cutting it off quickly when Anna raised an eyebrow at him. “Her bear won’t allow her to do that,” he pointed out.
“Then you’ll just have to persuade her bear,” Anna said. “You need to get her polar bear to choose you over him. Only then can I help you. I won’t go behind her back, Felix.”
He sighed. He understood it, he really did. Sara had had enough of her control taken away, and he couldn’t take this decision from her too. Of course he’d help her, no matter what, but she had to be the one to choose what happened now.
Dammit.
He turned to leave and then stopped, remembering his promise to Tara.
“Mrs Russell,” he began. “Tara wanted me to say something about her wedding dress.”
“Why doesn’t Tara tell me herself?” Anna raised an eyebrow. His lion took a massive step back inside his mind.
“Ummm… I think,” he said, then paused. “I just happened to be there, and she was thinking aloud. About the dress.”
“What about it?” Anna asked, head tilted and arms crossed. “Doesn’t she like the dress we picked out? The dress that I spent a whole day helping her find?”
“Yeah, she loves it,” he blurted out. He sent a silent apology to Tara. Self-preservation won out over impressing his mate or her sister. Turning, he fled.
***
Sara sighed as the teenage boy flinched away from her. She had been unable to stop the snarl that escaped when he had walked into her because he wasn’t watching where he was going. Her bear grumbled inside her mind, clearly unhappy with her.
Was this what her life would be from now on? Constantly on the verge of a meltdown? Yesterday’s incident at the gym was humiliating, particularly when she’d cried all over Felix, snuggling into him as though he was an overgrown teddy bear. Still, she couldn’t deny that she had felt better with him there and Felix hadn’t seemed to mind.
“Well, if it isn’t my wayward mate.” The voice came from behind her.
Sara froze, ice creeping along her spine. It couldn’t be. He wouldn’t have followed her here.
She turned. Ryan stood there, a smug grin on his face as he watched her. She hated him, truly despised him, yet her polar bear perked up at his presence. Traitorous bitch.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, trying to recapture the anger of a few moments earlier. Sadly, what she felt was fear and disgust in equal measures. She fought to keep her legs from crumbling under her.
“Looking for my mate,” he said, shrugging. “And now I’ve found her.”
“I’m not your mate,” she said, glaring at him, trying desperately to pretend she wasn’t intimidated by him. She couldn’t look at him without remembering that day when her world had fallen apart. She loathed the very sight of him, and yet her polar bear wouldn’t allow her to attack him.
“Your bear thinks otherwise,” he pointed out. He raised his hand and placed it on her shoulder. She tried to shrug him off, but he tightened his grip and her polar bear accepted his display of dominance.
“Why do you even want me?” she asked. “All those years and you were never interested. Why now? Why not wait for your true mate?”
“I don’t want you,” he said, smirking. “You’re really not my type. I do need your polar bear though. There just aren’t enough polar bear shifters around. My family have always kept the bloodlines pure, only mating with polar bears.” He sighed. “You’re not ideal, not with those mouse genes in your family and that abomination of a sister.”
Sara felt her anger rise, but she was still in no position to do anything about it. “Then why not find a pureblood and leave me alone?”
“Weren’t you listening?” he asked. “There aren’t many polar bear shifters, so my options are limited. I’m related to all the polar bears I know. Besides, your offspring will be polar bears and that’s what really matters.”
“Offspring?” she gaped at him. “There will be no offspring.”
“I think there will,” he said, his hand tightening further. He was hurting her now. Her bear was complaining but unwilling to fight against it. “Look at it this way, you give me a few polar bear cubs, and I’ll let you go. We’re already mated. Your bear will push you to do it anyway, I know mine has been anxious to get on with it.”
“Not. Happening,” she ground out. Her polar bear seemed unhappy with her answer. Tough.
“You’ll come around eventually,” Ryan told her. “Once you realise you have no choice. You can’t fight your polar bear indefinitely.”
“Watch me,” she growled at him, wrenching herself from his grip. At the last second, he let her go and her momentum had her falling, landing hard on the pavement.
“I’ll pick you up later,” Ryan said, looking down at her. “Wear something nice.”
With that, he walked off, leaving her sprawled on the pavement, hurt and humiliated once again.
“Hey, are you okay?” The voice belonged to a young man, a wolf shifter by his scent. He leaned down to help her up, but as soon as he made contact, she snarled at him, her polar bear enraged by the touch of another male.
“Sorry,” she mumbled, tears stinging her eyes. “Just leave me. I’ll be okay.”
The man looked uncertain, but kept his distance, allowing her to struggle to her feet. One of her legs stung from contact with the pavement, and a large scrape covered one palm. She wiped gingerly at her hand, unable to see it clearly because her eyes blurred so much from her tears.
“Can I call someone?” the man asked.
She shook her head. “No. I’m okay.” She was lying. Nothing was okay. Turning from the man, she walked away, determined to get home where she could fall apart in private.
***
Felix was instantly aware of the front door opening. Still, he forced himself to stay still, remaining sprawled over the couch.
He could smell the fabulous aroma of polar bear and woman. His mate. He frowned as he also caught a faint trace of blood and also a male polar bear. Oh, hell no.
He sat up as Sara entered the room, watching as she froze, staring at him. He stared right back. Her face was streaked with tears, her arms hugged herself. She looked so lost, so miserable that his heart broke for her.
Wordlessly, he stood and held out his arms. Sniffling, she limped towards him, letting him wrap his arms around her, holding her close. For the second time in as many days, he held his mate while she cried, soothing her as best he could.
“Ryan?” he asked.
She nodded and wrapped her arms tighter around him. Her body trembled against him and his lion growled inside his mind.
“Did he hurt you?” he demanded. If he had, it would be the last thing he ever did. Felix may be easy-going, but he was still a shifter male, a predator, and he wouldn’t allow anyone to hurt those he cared about.
“He grabbed me,” she said, the words muffled with her face pressed into his chest, his shirt becoming wet with her tears. “I fell getting away. My bear wouldn’t help me at all. She wanted to maul a man who was only trying to help me up, but she’ll let Ryan do anything.”
He hated the tone of defeat in her voice. Where was his fiery Sara? He snuggled her in closer, leaning his cheek against the top of her head.
“What about now?” he asked her. “I’m touching you. Does she want to maul me?”
She pulled back a little and looked up at him, her eyes wide. “No,” she said. She blinked at him. “She’s okay with you touching me.”
He grinned at her. “Then we’re getting somewhere, aren’t we? This is the second time I’ve hugged you without being attacked. Your polar bear just ne
eds a little longer to adjust to me.”
She smiled sadly. “It’s not happening fast enough.” Another tear escaped, trailing down her cheek. “Ryan is here now and determined that I start popping out polar bear cubs. He doesn’t even like me, Felix. He only wants my polar bear genes.” She wiped her hand over her face.
He couldn’t stop the growl that came from deep in his chest. “He can’t have them. Any cubs you have will be mine.”
She stared at him. “Ryan’s family are snobs. They don’t believe in mixing species, so he needs a female polar bear shifter to carry on his line.”
“Not my problem,” Felix said. “My family are all lions so far, but we really don’t care about mixing it up. And I know you don’t care about purity. Your family is already mixed species.”
She flinched a little, and he narrowed his eyes at her.
“No, it’s not that,” she assured him. “Obviously, we don’t care if our true mates are another species. It’s just that we’re a little sensitive… because of Kara.”
Ah, the hybrid sister. Most shifters took their animal from one parent or the other. In extremely rare cases, someone managed to get both, and the results were unpredictable. Like Kara, who ended up as a white polar-bear-sized mouse with sharp canines. Or so he’d been told. He’d yet to meet that sister.
“Would it bother you if we had a half-lion, half-polar bear cub?” he asked. “I think it would be cute.”
“No,” she said. “I just worry because I know how hard it’s been on Kara. I don’t want our kids to struggle like that.”
His heart warmed as she so naturally spoke of their cubs. He didn’t think she’d even realised she was talking about children with him.
“Of course they won’t struggle,” he said, flashing her his best cheeky grin. “No matter which animal they are, you know they’ll have fabulous hair.”
Polar Opposites Page 4
