He’d been looked at with lust by women his entire life. But no woman had ever seen him, body and soul, the way Sidri did. One look from her, and for the first time in his life, he felt just as desirable on the inside as he did on the outside, no matter what turmoil his demons created within.
For that alone, he would love her forever.
Shuddering, Allen finally managed to snap the button open. A gasp tore from his throat as his own fingers brushed his erection through the fabric of his slacks as he reached down to hold his fly. He took the zipper down, one tooth at a time, every tiny click ricocheting through the room like so many gunshots. As he finally eased the fabric down his thighs, cursing Sidri’s command to leave the shorts in place, he registered the catch in Sidri’s breathing, could almost hear the pounding of her heart increase with every inch of flesh he revealed. He stepped out of the slacks and shoes, feeling vulnerable and exposed, and looked up to see Sidri staring at him.
Not staring. Eating him alive with her eyes alone. Her breathing was erratic, a deep blush spreading down her neck and over her breasts. Lust, need, and sheer adulation burned in her gaze, so strong and so sure, Allen stopped feeling self-conscious instantly. There could be no doubt, none, of how sexy, how beautiful, how perfect she found him to be. The unfettered wanting in her eyes filled him with a confidence unlike anything he’d ever known.
He stood straighter, basking in the glow of her obvious desire. For the first time in his life, he stopped wondering when the glamour would break, stopped waiting for the beauty to fade, revealing the monster he was inside. In Sidri’s eyes, the angel and the demon were one and the same, and to her, at least, both were equally beautiful.
“Come here,” Sidri said in a hoarse whisper, swallowing hard. She sat up and moved to the edge of the futon, spreading her thighs in an inviting denim-clad v.
Allen instantly complied, coming to a stop inches away from touching her. With her head even with his throbbing erection, he couldn’t help but envision those sinful lips wrapped around his cock, taking him deep. He swallowed, shaking hands curled at his sides as he fought the urge to bury his fingers in her thick auburn hair. He could feel her breath washing over his heated flesh, literally feel the weight of her desire.
With trembling fingers, she reached out and hooked the waistband of his shorts. As the breath spasmed in his chest, she freed his aching erection with a single, strong downward tug.
“Perfection,” she breathed, as the proof of his arousal bobbed free and reached for his belly button. Allen couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, could only stare and shiver as her fiery eyes caressed every inch of his cock. Pre-cum dripped from the mushroom head, leaving shiny lines of arousal on his stomach. Her hot mouth so close, the sheer lust in her gaze as she admired him without touching made him wonder if his heart were going to burst.
Sidri swallowed, trailing her fingers up the outside of his thighs, making his skin twitch and his cock jump. She looked up at him through her lashes.
“Shaved? Or waxed?” she asked in a breathy whisper.
Allen closed his eyes briefly, but for the first time ever didn’t feel ashamed while he answered her. “Neither,” he grated, throat full of lust and gravel. She cocked an eyebrow, which he answered with a one-armed shrug. “Genetic defect. No hair but what’s on my head and in my eyebrows. Can’t even grow a beard, just stubble. Parents thought I was late hitting puberty until the doctor figured it out. Been that way my whole life.”
“Jesus Christ, that is so fucking sexy,” she said in a breathy whisper, not even giving him a chance to become self-conscious. Abruptly, she stood, slid both hands behind his neck, and yanked him down for a soul-searing kiss. Allen groaned into her mouth as she mashed her body against his, the harsh lines of her jeans jamming his cock against his stomach.
Before he knew what was happening, she turned them around and pushed them both down on the futon, straddling his hips. He whimpered deep in his chest, both hands clamping on her thighs as he started grinding himself against her pelvic bone. The fact that she was still mostly clothed while he lay under her, completely naked, sent fiery shocks of pure lust rocketing through his veins.
He’d never been with a woman like her. Didn’t think there was another woman like her. So tiny and delicate he could bench-press her easily, yet so strong and utterly in command from the moment she opened her mouth. He felt drunk, intoxicated, utterly lost in the power of her kiss, her weight across his thighs. Head spinning, heart pounding, he kissed her as if his life depended on it.
And by now, he was almost certain that it did.
Chapter 9
She needed to come. Now.
Breaking away from Allen’s sinful lips with a gasp, Sidri sat up straight, moving forward so her weight settled across his stomach instead of his lap. He might enjoy the rasp and burn of her jeans across his cock for a few moments, but eventually it would hurt.
She wouldn’t hurt him for the world.
He was precious. Priceless. So achingly perfect it almost brought tears to her eyes. Hearing his explanation of the words engraved in his flesh, seeing the tattoo that embodied the constant battle waging through his soul, had nearly brought her to her knees. He had no idea, none, what kind of treasure he was. He had the tortured genius of Picasso, the dreamer’s vision of Da Vinci, the existential purity of Monet. He was both art and artist, lover and fighter, jailor and condemned.
And after tonight, she was never, ever letting him go. He was hers. But more importantly, she was his.
Fighting to overcome the storm of emotion raging through her soul, Sidri braced both hands on his hard chest and murmured, “Put your hands above your head, grip the arm of the futon. Don’t let go, or everything stops.”
He complied with gratifying swiftness, even as shadows danced through his eyes. “You’re not going to tie me up or anything, are you?” he asked lightly, obviously trying to sound nonchalant.
Sidri yanked her mind back from the sexual abyss and forced herself to concentrate. He had no idea how much he revealed himself sometimes. Though the words had been light and playful, the fear behind that question showed in the nervous laughter that followed. He wasn’t asking if she planned to tie him up—he was asking her not to.
Oh, you poor angel, Sidri thought compassionately. How many demons have tortured that beautiful soul? And how have you managed to survive so much yet come through it all still so achingly pure of spirit?
Well, at least she knew how to slay this particular demon.
Raising an eyebrow, she settled her weight more fully across him, resting both hands over his heart. “Now why would I want to do that?” she asked with a questioning purr.
He swallowed visibly. “I…don’t know. Some people, you know, like that sort of thing.” He looked away quickly as an adorable little blush turned the tips of his ears red.
Sidri let her lips quirk into a half smile as she danced her fingers over his pecs. “Some people like to have their choices taken away,” she refuted quietly.
His eyes snapped back to hers instantly. She kept her tone steady, sensual. “It’s not the act of being tied up that turns them on. It’s the knowledge that no matter how hard they fight, no matter how hard they squirm, they have no choice but to accept the pleasure being offered them. Being restrained means their partner can do as they please, for as long as they please, and they have no say in what comes next.”
He shivered beneath her. Sidri let her fingers glide across that mouth-wateringly smooth skin, then trailed the tips over her own thighs, making for the button on her jeans. He swallowed again as she continued her sensual explanation.
“I, on the other hand, have no desire to take your choices away,” she told him in a hot, sexy whisper. “I want you to make the decision, over and over again, to let me have my way with you. Did you know that it’s actually much, much harder to remain still when there’s nothing holding you back but your own mind?”
She slipped the button free, reached for
the zipper. He whimpered.
“I don’t want to know you’ve been made helpless, that you can pull against those restraints and still never escape my hold on you.” She pulled the tab, taking the zipper down slowly and revealing a hint of lacy black panties beneath. This time, he groaned.
She went on. “I want to know you’re keeping yourself still to please me, that you’re doing as I’ve asked because that’s what you want as well.”
She dipped a hand inside her panties, loving the way his eyes tracked the movement. She could see him desperately straining to see more, feel the thrum of his desire as he prayed for X-ray vision so he could see what the hell her fingers were doing in there.
But he didn’t move his hands.
She purred as her own fingers brushed her clit. He jerked, knuckles turning white as he began to pant. Closing her eyes, Sidri rocked her hips, riding his taut stomach and her own fingers as the scent of her arousal began to permeate the air. Licking her lips, she continued in a bated whisper.
“I’ll never take your choices away, Allen,” she promised him huskily. His whole body vibrated beneath her. She hummed her pleasure as her fingers began to move faster, her hips jerking unsteadily. “Everything that happens between us, between you and me and Tatum when he finally drags his sorry ass home”—and here she paused for a wink, which he answered with a breathy moan—“will happen because it was your choice. I don’t need you bound and gagged to find release. I need you ready, willing, and eager to experience every pleasure we can bring you.”
Panting herself now, she leaned forward, bracing her free hand on his chest as her fingers worked madly against her clit. Voice lost, she opened her eyes to find him gasping beneath her, eyes intent on what little he could see happening inside her jeans. Moaning, Sidri pressed down, hard, and ground herself against his taut belly.
The orgasm that rocketed through her was hard, bright, and not nearly enough. She rode it out, breathless, even as her body screamed for more, more, more, more…
Breath coming in short, sharp gasps, Sidri pulled her fingers from her pussy and pressed them to Allen’s lips. He sucked them into his mouth with a groan of pure ecstasy, licking every last drop of her cum from the digits. She shuddered, fucking loving his enthusiasm, the way he still kept his hands where she’d requested them to be, even as his entire being screamed at her to fuck him, or let him fuck her, or fucking do something before he exploded right underneath her.
“That’s all yours,” she breathed, waiting until his overheated gaze focused through the haze of lust surrounding them.
She pulled her still-wet fingers from his lips, caressed his jaw briefly, and made sure she had his full attention. Then, with a sinuous move that would have made Lilith proud, she stood up on the futon, still straddling him. Allen lay beneath her, naked, eyes wild and desperate, his fingers clamped so tightly in the fabric of the couch arm she feared it might rip right off the frame. He was yearning, straining toward her, practically screaming for permission to caress and touch.
But he didn’t move his hands.
Sidri murmured her approval as she reached for her bra clasp. Snapping the tiny enclosures, she pulled it free slowly, one strap at a time, holding the cups over her breasts until the very last second. Then she let it fall, right across Allen’s pulsing throat, where she knew his submissive soul screamed to have a collar. She would never do that to him—not the reality of it, anyway—but she could and would give him the illusion. It would be a balm his soul needed that his psyche refused to acknowledge, no matter how much of his true nature he came to embrace over the next few weeks. When he eventually accepted this truth about himself, her angel would finally understand what it meant to take flight and set himself free.
When the silky black fabric draped itself across his neck, Allen let loose a long, low moan of undiluted pleasure. That he probably told himself it was from finally getting the chance to see her tits was irrelevant. She knew the truth, even if he refused to accept it.
She would guard his heart, mind, and soul with everything she was, for the rest of her life.
Eyes locked on his, she tucked her thumbs inside the waistband of her jeans and slowly, slowly drew them down her hips. He tracked every move, every inch of skin revealed, with eyes that nearly screamed his hunger. When balance required she shift to one foot, Allen immediately let go with one hand and braced her calf. She clucked her disapproval even as she smiled, grateful for the assistance. When she had one leg free, she braced her foot against his side, and proffered the remaining pant leg.
“Take it off me,” she growled breathlessly. “One hand only.”
He complied, drawing the fabric over her ankle and foot with reverence. When he tossed it to the floor and immediately returned to a two-handed grip on the arm of the futon, she nearly came right then. Standing over him in nothing but black panties and white socks, Sidri nearly wept for the beauty of the man beneath her.
Clearing her throat, she sought his gaze once more. “You can let go. Sit up, and take my panties off. With your teeth.”
His moan was gratifyingly desperate. Immediately, he sat up and wrapped both arms around her bare hips. She gasped, bracing her hands against those powerful shoulders, her fingertips brushing to words inscribed below the nape of his neck. She was panting, almost hyperventilating, as he brought his mouth closer and closer to her aching mons. When his teeth sank into the elastic waistband, she nearly passed out.
Allen’s growl of pure male approval did all sorts of fabulous things to her libido. He pulled the fabric down, releasing a stronger dose of her perfume into the air. His chin brushed over her clit, her labia on the way down, and she whimpered. When the panties got hung up at the points of her hips, he snarled with frustration and took matters into his own hands. He reached up, yanked the silky, wet fabric down to her knees, and buried his face in her dripping sex.
Sidri gasped as his tongue did magical things to her pussy, burying her fingers in his hair as she held on for dear life. She let him have his way for a moment, then gave his hair a sharp jerk. He pulled back, staring up at her with unrepentant lust, and she had to bite back a smile. Keeping her voice stern, she gave another hard tug. “I didn’t give you permission to do that. Perhaps I should make myself come again and let you continue to suffer.”
His moan of denial set sparkles of need dancing through her body. She tugged again, stepping back slightly. Rebellion flashed in his gaze, but he returned to the business of removing her panties, obviously afraid she meant her sensual threat. She let him pull the material down and off with his hands, though, just to get it out of the way that much sooner.
The moment her panties hit the floor, she dropped to her knees, still straddling his lap. Allen’s whole body shook as his cock rode her furrow, his arms coming around her waist. She braced both hands behind his neck and captured his lips, loving her own taste on his tongue, in his mouth. She kissed him like a starving woman, desperate for the only sustenance that mattered, that only he could give her.
With his hips bucking beneath her, Sidri pushed them both down, until she once again lay over his burning-hot body. Then, without missing a beat, she twisted her hips in a sinuous curve, caught the head of his cock at the entrance to her pussy, and took him inside in one long, deep downward thrust.
Both of them froze, trembling. Fuck, he felt huge inside her, stretching long-unused tissues deliciously. She’d seen how long, how thick his smooth cock was up close and personal just a few moments ago, but seeing and feeling were two very different things.
They panted into each other’s mouths for a tense moment while Sidri fought the desire to come and keep coming, just from that single penetration. With her fingers buried in his sexy black hair, she held onto him for dear life as wave after wave of pure bliss radiated through her.
So. Fucking. Perfect.
When she finally regained control, Sidri took a deep, steadying breath and began to rock. Allen’s whole body shuddered as she rode him with
tiny circling motions of her hips. With his arms clamped over her thighs and back, she couldn’t get a lot of leverage. But the sheer size of him, the depth and breadth of his penetration, had her riding the edge of orgasm almost immediately.
It was like trying to ride a volcano. Her skin literally burned every place she touched him just from the furnace heat he radiated. Deep, vibrating rumbles of pleasure and approval bled from his chest straight through her body, down to her toes. With her face pressed against his neck, she could easily feel how erratic his pulse was, how desperately he fought to take in air. His hot little moans, the clamp of his fingers digging into her hips hard enough to leave bruises, all combined to create a whirlwind of lust and uncompromising sensuality deep in her core. His gloriously hard cock rubbed her in all the right places, dancing over her G-spot with every spiral of her hips.
And with no warning, no build-up, no time to control her reaction, Sidri blew apart in his arms.
The orgasm staggered her. She felt her inner muscles contracting, milking him until he began to pulse with his own release. Feeling the hot jets of semen bathe her inside only set her off again. She groaned, clamping her teeth in his shoulder as she shook with the force of the explosion. Allen was panting, his thighs shaking, as he emptied himself inside her.
It lasted an eternity. A beautiful, perfect, never-ending eternity. She basked in the afterglow for a long, long time, unable to break away, clinging to him like the lifeline he had become.
And then the dumbass had to go and bring up the one topic she’d hoped to avoid until sometime in the very, very distant future.
“Fuck, Sid,” he whispered against her temple, “we didn’t use a condom. I’m so, so sorry.”
Chapter 10
Demons Within [For Love of Authority] (Siren Publishing Ménage and More) Page 10
