“Put me down, boy!” she demanded, laughing. “You haven’t changed one iota. Still showing off how strong you are!”
“Ma, you’re a lightweight!” he teased, and ducked when she batted at his cheek.
“I’m sure that’s the line you use with all the women you’ve carried up these stairs!” she retorted, and laughed again when his cheeks flushed with color.
“Ignore your mother, son,” his dad suggested, coming in for his own hug. “She just loves to make her men blush!”
Cal hugged his father, loving the strength he could still feel in the older man’s embrace.
“It’s good to see you two,” he said, and ushered them inside. “You know where to go,” he told his mom, “if you need to lie down. I’ll take these up for you in a few minutes. I just want to know what you’d like for dinner.”
His mother shooed him away. “I’ll make us dinner, sweetie. I’m not that tired. I slept really well last night, for a change.”
He saw the look his parents exchanged at her comment, and suddenly, he felt like a third wheel. He wanted his woman to look at him that way. He wanted to give her the same look. And he admitted he wanted the woman to be Vivica. Which reminded him, he might as well get the news over and done with, before one or other of them discovered it by accident and gave him a hard time for not telling them.
“By the way, guess who my new neighbor is?”
“You have a neighbor at last? Hallelujah! I can’t guess...who is it?” His mother smiled at him as she walked ahead of the two men into the kitchen.
“Remember Vivica?” Cal knew it was a ridiculous question, since his mother had told him repeatedly that she was very disappointed that he had not made Viv her daughter-in-law.
“She lives next door now? How long ago did she move in? And what else have you been keeping from us?”
His mother poked him in the arm as she shot the questions at him. He laughed indulgently, and grabbed her hands before she could poke him again.
“She just moved in a few weeks ago,” he said.
“It’ll be lovely to see her again,” she continued. “Invite her over for dinner.”
“Ma, she may already have plans,” he protested, wondering why he had thought it was such a good idea to man up so soon.
“Okay, invite her for dinner tomorrow night, then,” she conceded, and he saw she would not take no for an answer.
He nodded, and let her go. No use flogging a dead horse, as his father would say. He left them in the kitchen to take their things up to the room they used when they came to visit. He spent the rest of the afternoon bringing them up to speed on his rehab, and getting all the news from back home. When they finally went for a nap, “so we can be awake for Die Hard 2”, he spent the hours until it was time to escort Vivica home working on the unfinished painting. Now that he had admitted to feelings for her, at least to himself, the need to reproduce her on paper had weakened. Or maybe it was because he had finally gotten to taste her, and his body knew there was more where that came from. In fact, his body hoped like hell there would be lots more where that came from. He just kept having to remind his dick that she was not his for the taking. At least, not yet. Once he got her to divorce the bastard she was married to though, all bets were off.
Chapter 7 -- Kisses Like Wine
She was early getting home, and he met her as she was turning down their avenue. She saw him and her body language changed, until she recognized him and relaxed.
“You’re early,” he said accusingly.
“I got off a half hour early because I…” She stopped, and when he realized that she wasn’t going to finish her sentence, he prompted her.
“Because you what?” Still, she hesitated, and she could almost feel his suspicions rising. “What happened, Viv?”
“It was nothing. I’m fine.”
She evaded his question, disinclined to let him touch her, even to relieve her of the backpack, because she knew she was defenseless against him when he touched her, even accidentally. But she could tell that he was not going to allow her to freeze him out. Not this time. He stopped in the middle of the block, moving to stand in front of her, and holding her by her forearms, lightly but firmly.
“Talk to me, Vivica!”
She looked him in the eye and lied to him. “I told you, I’m fine!”
He didn’t buy it, and she wasn’t surprised. But her head ached abominably, and after the lights on the bus, she needed the darkness of her room and the silence and stillness of her bed. She needed to get home with the least amount of drama, but she didn’t want Cal feeling he had to babysit her, either. Especially not with the sparks that flew between them every time they met. Just thinking about the massage that morning, and how he was so rigid in his shorts made her want to scream with frustration, but the noise would make her pain worse. And he’d want to know why. She couldn’t tell him she was hot for him, and put herself to bed in more ways than one for the past three nights just from thoughts of him.
“I didn’t feel well,” she said, and pulled away from him.
He took the backpack from her, and she gave up trying to hold on to it after a second. It was too much effort, and she felt like she was going to throw up again. That and almost passing out had been the reason for her early departure from work. Cal knew about her migraines, but it had been twenty years, and she didn’t want to remind him of how sick she could become.
“I think I may just be coming down with something,” she said, trying to hurry and noticing that he kept pace with her.
He didn’t answer, but when they got to her door, he walked in behind her, put the bag down on the floor next to the coat rack, and pulled her into his arms. She noticed that he didn’t turn the lights on. Did he know? His next words answered her unspoken question.
“Can you make it up the stairs by yourself?” When she gazed at him, stupefied by pain and astonishment, he picked her up and said, “Which way to your bedroom?”
He began to climb the stairs before she even answered, and she nestled her face into the space between his neck and shoulders and let him carry her. He would figure it out when he got there. All she wanted to do was lie down, close her eyes, and keep from heaving. His steps were firm and sure, and before long, she felt him lower her to her feet. Keeping her steady with one hand, he pulled back the pretty pink coverlet and then sat her down on the edge. Sitting next to her, he picked up each foot and removed her shoes. Then he removed her jacket, turned her and tucked her in, covering her with the blanket.
“I’ll make you a cup of tea. Do you have everything?”
She nodded, tears pooling in her eyes, and he bent down and kissed her cheek, before walking out to make the herb tea she usually needed to settle her stomach and put her to sleep. She hadn’t been cared for like this since she had moved out on her own, long before she married Ray. Cal had always known exactly what she needed to help the migraine dissipate quickly. Ray had never bothered to find out, even in the early years, when their marriage had seemed to be stable. The tears slipped down to her ears, and she was too tired even to wipe them away. She closed her eyes instead, and didn’t know when she fell asleep.
Something woke her, and she turned her head to listen. Someone was breathing in the room with her...next to her, but not in bed with her. Cal! She opened her eyes, testing the strength of the pain, and thankfully, it was significantly less. Still, she had to move with caution...these headaches were often like the pea in the whistle, not moving until someone blew it. She had to be careful not to stir it up again, because she knew anything could trigger another attack. And as she couldn’t call in sick so soon after starting her new job, she had to make sure she rested completely, and did the minimum amount of moving. She needed to relieve herself, too, and thought it best to do that without waking Cal.
Sliding her feet out from under the covers, she sat up slowly, letting her body get used to the new position before standing up just as slowly. Her head felt as though it was full
of cotton, but she managed to make it to the ensuite bathroom without bumping into anything. Cal had not moved from his position in the armchair next to her bed. She switched on the light, and her eyes protested, so she quickly doused them and did her business in the dark. Then she reached up to the medicine cabinet and found the bottle of migraine pills. She shook out two of them, grateful for the reflected light from the street lamp, and swallowed them with a mouthful of water. Cal’s question stopped her in her tracks as she crept back to her bed.
“What do you think you’re doing?” His voice had an edge to it, and she backed up, her feathers ruffled by his tone.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know I needed permission to go where I wanted to whenever I choose to in my own home,” she snapped, raising her voice at the end in total irritation, and then wincing when she had a sharp reminder of why he had been asleep in a chair in her bedroom. And trust him to have heard her even though she had been super quiet.
He inhaled deeply and stood up, seeming to tower over her in the dark room. “I’ll go reheat the tea,” he said simply, and took the mug she hadn’t noticed off the night table before walking out of the room.
She got back into bed, sitting up this time, determined to see him leave before she went back to sleep. This situation could spiral out of control too easily, what with Cal acting like the husband she had had never done, and with her feeling vulnerable and horny. When he returned with the steaming tea, she tried to take it from him, but he refused to let her. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he held the mug while she sipped, enjoying the soothing flavor and scent, and the curious intimacy of the moment. When she put a hand on his to stop him, he put the mug down and looked back at her.
“Feeling better?’ he wanted to know.
“Yes. Thank you, Cal,” she said. “You should probably go home now. I’ll be fine.”
“You’re not going in to work, are you?” he asked, and she could see him gearing up to argue with her. She stopped him.
“Yes, I am, so you might as well just save your breath.” When he frowned, she added, “And if you really want me to get better quickly, you’ll not upset me by trying to tell me how to live my life. I’ve been looking after myself quite well without you these last twenty years, thank you very much!”
He recoiled as if she had slapped him, and she immediately regretted her words. He had looked after her, and been kind to her, and even if she suspected that he had an ulterior motive, he had acted honorably. She had no right to throw their past in his face. Before she could form the words of apology, he stood up and walked over to the door.
“My parents are here,” he said, not addressing her comment. “Mom wants you to come over for dinner tomorrow after work. I guess I’ll see you then. Good night, Viv. Sleep well.”
He turned and walked out, oblivious to the tears that sprang to her eyes, or the distress she was feeling. He walked down the stairs, and she found herself hurrying after him, feeling the nausea returning, and the pounding in her head, because she was still sick. She called out to him as he reached for his coat, and he turned to look at her as she came off the last stair.
“Go back to bed, Viv,” he said, but finished putting his coat on.
“Cal, please, I’m sorry. Don’t go like this. Please!”
She stood before him, not touching him, her lips trembling. When he reached for her, she sighed and relaxed into his body, letting him pull her in. She put her arms around him, wishing she could stay there, sheltered by him, forever.
“Viv, I’m sorry I left you. I was young and stupid. But I’m not that boy anymore.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I’m just so afraid, Cal.”
“Afraid? Of me?” His eyes searched her face as he asked the question.
“Of us,” she said simply, and raised her head to kiss him.
She wanted this kiss. She wanted to show him that she was where he was, even if neither of them could indulge in the feelings that had been unwrapped between them after all these years. She felt him take it over, holding her head steady so he could eat her up. She reveled in the strength of his hands, the hardness of his body, and the way he seemed to cherish her. His kiss was masterful, waking a need inside her that she knew he could never meet, but not because he didn’t want to. His words, when he released her lips, echoed her thoughts.
“Viv, you have no idea how much I want you,” he whispered in her ear as he moved from her mouth to kiss her there. “But we can’t, baby,” he added, licking her behind it, and letting his warm breath caress her there. “So I think you’d better just go back to bed, okay? As soon as I close the door, lock it and go back upstairs. Can you do that for me?’
He kissed her again, taking her lips and stroking his tongue into her mouth with barely controlled passion. She kissed him back, her body taut with hunger. She let him hold her like he would never let her go, and she wished it were true. Suddenly, it was too much; it was more than she could bear. She was clinging to a man she could never have as long as she was tied to Ray. She pulled her mouth away, catching her breath on a sob.
“Try to go back to sleep, baby,” Cal said, seeming to realize he could do nothing to soothe her hurt. He squeezed her shoulders before slipping through her front door. She watched him walk away, and when he was inside his own home, she closed her door, locked and bolted it, and went back up to bed. The lukewarm tea was still on the table where she had left it, and she finished it as quickly as she dared, so as not to upset her stomach. Then she lay down again and prayed for sleep.
When the cell phone alarm went off the next morning, Vivica rolled out of bed, slowly, feeling as though someone had hit her in the head with a hammer. Her head felt sore, and her limbs were weighted. She dragged herself to the bathroom, knowing a hot shower would relieve some of the aftermath of the migraine. She swallowed two more pills before washing her hair and soaking up the comfort of a hot shower. Deciding she needed comfort clothing today, the way she needed comfort food on her period, she chose soft black yoga pants which she drew on over socks. Choosing socks to match, a white undershirt and pink cable knit sweater, she finished dressing, dreading having to bend over to lace up her sneakers. The doorbell rang, making her wince. She took the sneakers with her down to answer it, and wasn’t surprised to see Cal standing on her porch.
“Morning, Viv,” he said. “I came to take you to work.”
Without answering him, she stepped aside and let him in leaving him to sit on the stairs to deal with her shoes. He came over and knelt before her, taking them from her and putting them on for her, tying the laces and helping her to her feet. She was speechless. He hadn’t changed at all, except to become even more the man she wanted in her life, in her home, in her body. She turned hurriedly away, not wanting to break down again, knowing tears would only exacerbate the delicate state of her head.
“Have you made the tea as yet?” he asked, and when she said no, he said, “Go finish dressing and I’ll make it for you. Can you handle a few crackers as well?”
“I don’t know.” She didn’t know what she could handle anymore, whether it was food, or an attentive Cal, or her life. She went back up the stairs to pack her backpack, put on a bit of makeup to disguise the tiredness, and then went back to the kitchen. Cal was waiting for her, sitting at the table with a mug of tea and a few crackers on a plate.
“Cal, you don’t have to do this,” she began, sitting down to drink and nibble at the crackers.
“I know,” he said. “You’ve been sick without me for twenty years and managed just fine.”
She looked up sharply, because there had been no tone she could read in his voice. He was staring at her, his eyes warm and full of an emotion she had never expected to see in them again, mostly because she had never expected to see him again.
“I…” she began, but he cut her off.
“I’m going to ask Trey to assign someone else to do my daily massages,” he said, completely changing the topic.
She was taken aback.
“Why?”
His gaze pierced her. “Think about it, Viv,” he said.
She didn’t have to. She knew how difficult it was for both of them to remain professional when the desire between them flared out of control every time. And Cal needed to be cared for by someone who wasn’t blindsided by lust just looking at him. She sighed, curiously disappointed. Maybe it hadn’t been a good idea buying this house after all, as it only seemed to be complicating her life. And now it seemed like Cal was pushing her away, although she had apologized her for words earlier.
“Don’t forget you’re invited to dinner later,” he continued. “I’ve told Ma you get home late. If you tell me what time to come get you, I can pick you up, if you like.”
She wanted to say she didn’t need either a babysitter or a chauffeur, but she knew it would be the wrong thing to say. He was doing his best to be mature. The least she could do was to follow suit. She had a couple of objections, but she only voiced one.
“I can’t imagine that your parents’ dinner time is that late, Cal. I don’t want to put them out.”
“It’s fine,” he said. “They’ll have dessert while you and I eat. You know how Ma is,”
Yes, she did know. Mrs. Appleton loved to entertain, and she wouldn’t take no for an answer. She finished her tea, although she couldn’t finish the crackers, and followed Cal out to his truck, which he had parked at the curb. He helped her in, and she smelled leather and Cal, as well as the brisk air freshener he had in it. Her heart ached. She didn’t want him to become distant again. She realized, as they drove along, that she had missed him terribly, more than she had been willing to let anyone see. If he withdrew again, she feared she would lose him forever, and right now, she needed him in her life.
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