“Ryan—”
She stopped him by covering his hand on the table. “Patrick, why are we talking about Ryan?”
He’d rehearsed what he wanted to say so many times, he’d forgotten his lines. Over-preparation, like on the field. Mentally preparing for one style of play and having the opposing team go at it a completely different way. Games were lost when the opponent got inside your head. Stephanie was getting inside his head big time.
“I’m sorry.”
“You sure do spend a lot of time telling me you’re sorry. I’m getting double messages here, Patrick.”
He was totally confused. This is the part of being with a woman that frustrated him, had been the sole reason he’d never hooked up with anyone for more than a couple of dates. Women were so confusing, so difficult to read. When he was defending the box, he could tell which foot the forward was going to use nearly every time, but he didn’t have a clue what was going on with Stephanie. He began to think having her come down to San Diego had been a colossal mistake.
“Try just telling me the truth, Patrick.”
“I’m leaving soccer to try out for the SEAL teams, Stephanie. It’s been arranged, but no guarantees.”
“What? You had me fly down here to tell me this?”
“Not entirely.”
“There’s more?”
“Yes. I wanted to explain my decision.”
“Okay. We could have done this by phone.”
No way, ma’am. He had a goal to achieve tonight. It had nothing to do with scoring, either. It had everything to do with laying a firm foundation for something bigger than that.
“Wanted to tell you in person.”
“Okay.”
“I love playing soccer. I love the money. I love my teammates. And yes, I enjoyed the girls.” He searched her eyes but didn’t find judgment there. “Steph, there have been lots of girls. I need you to know that.”
“Okay. What makes you think you’re the only one?”
He hesitated for a second before he saw her smile. “Don’t look at me that way, Patrick. Ryan was only my second.”
He blushed in spite of himself. He still didn’t feel at ease with her, although she was encouraging him. Or, at least she wasn’t rejecting him.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay with my decision.”
She leaned back in her chair, arms crossed. “So where is this going?”
“None of that past matters to me. Point is, coming home has changed me. I didn’t expect I would ever want to give up soccer and now I do. I can see it. I want to do something else with my life. Make a difference somehow.”
“Okay. You want my blessing, is that it?” She kept her arms crossed.
“Yes. It’s important to me.”
She leaned forward, placing her chin on her folded fingers, her elbows on the table. “Tell me why, Patrick.” Her eyes didn’t flinch.
This was the do or die moment for him. He hoped he’d given it enough explanation that she’d feel comfortable with what he’d been rehearsing all afternoon.
“I want to see if we can work something out together, Steph. What I’m saying is that I want to try. We’ll take it slow, but that’s what I want, and I want to be honest with you about all of this. You also need to understand I want to become a SEAL, too. If I don’t make a team, I’ll be in the Navy. There’s no buyout of a contract clause in the enlistment. There’s no guarantee I won’t become a cook on a carrier, although I can’t cook, so that’s probably a long shot. I could be a—”
“Patrick, would you look at me?”
That’s when he realized he’d been looking everywhere else but at her. He couldn’t tell if she was angry or just confused. “Look, Stephanie, we know each other. I mean we know more about each other than most married couples, I think. I know we haven’t spent much time around each other for several years, but once you know someone that well, I think you always know them. We’d be perfect together—we have the—”
“Patrick, shut up.”
He almost didn’t notice she’d interrupted him. Her steady brown eyes gazed back at him, and she was smiling. Finally she was smiling. He angled his head to make sure he’d heard her right.
“I’ll give it a try,” she whispered, taking his hand.
“Tomorrow I go over and check things out. I wanted you there, too. Next I have to go back formally buy out my contract.”
“Will that be a problem?”
“They’ve always got talent stacked up, so they’ve got two perfectly good keepers they’ve been grooming. I think the club will actually benefit financially if I leave.” He watched their fingers entwine on the tabletop. “I wanted to be sure you were okay with my decision. I thought you could get your questions answered, and there are some people you could talk to—”
“Do you think Ryan and I ever talked about this?”
“Right.” Of course, they had. What was he thinking?
“So what’s your schedule like, do you have any idea?”
“It’ll take a few weeks to get processed and released from the Tottenham team. I sign up at the Recruitment Center and it all depends on when they have a spot. I might ship out the next day. Not like the published schedules they do for Tottenham.”
“So when would you move out here?” she asked as her eyes showed that coyness he loved, snagging his heart.
“How about tomorrow? We could find a place to rent. I could try to get out here a few days here and there.”
She giggled at that. “Never in a million years did it occur to me that this morning I’d be thinking about moving here.” Then she frowned.
“I’d like to start looking for a place right away, if that’s agreeable.”
“You worried I’ll change my mind?”
“I don’t want to let you get away.”
“I’ve always been here, Patrick. I think that’s why this keeps moving so fast. I promised myself I wouldn’t do that, but here I am.”
“Yes. Here you are. It feels right, Stephanie. You could come back with me to England. We get the release and travel a bit around Europe, have a little time to ourselves. And then we get serious with the Navy.”
“I’d have to help them find a replacement for the upcoming school year, but then I could go. That actually sounds like fun.”
“Okay. You join me in what, a couple of weeks?”
“In London?”
“Why not? You ever see London during the holidays? It’s outstanding.” He pulled her fingers to his lips.
Holy shit. She actually said yes.
The waiter came to take their order. They gazed at each other. The standoff soon got smoldering, while her beautiful eyes softened, the crease at the right side of her mouth dimpled as her lips curled up into a sultry smile that could only mean one thing.
Without taking his eyes off of her, he said, “I think we’re going to have dessert first.” She tilted her head and saluted him with her water glass. Finally they were on the same page. The waiter mumbled something about going to get the dessert menu and she stopped him.
“I’m sorry, but we’re going to have dessert somewhere else. But thanks.” She didn’t look at the waiter, either, even though the young man tried to get their attention.
Their attention was riveted elsewhere.
Chapter 11
Patrick had booked a room overlooking the water at a nearby hotel. Their view of the moonlight on the harbor was like a movie set. Without turning on the lights, they dropped their bags and walked to the window. His arms went around her waist. Stephanie felt comfortable, settled, even though things were moving at lightning speed.
She wondered what Ryan would think, and came to the conclusion he would approve. If he couldn’t be there, he would choose Patrick, not to take his place, but to care for Stephanie, because he knew he could always count on his best friend, and because he also knew she had always carried a torch for him.
It would be difficult being alone again after Patrick left for Eng
land, but it was an important opportunity to start putting the past to rest. She didn’t want to erase those wonderful memories of Ryan, memories she’d always have. But it would be painful to remain in the town where she and Ryan had fallen in love, to see all the places they used to go, meet people they’d talked to as a couple. It seemed healthy for her to start fresh in another location, in a country she’d never been to, with someone she had always loved and trusted showing her the way.
“Your thoughts?” he whispered in her ear.
“Just was wondering what it would be like to visit England. Never been anywhere outside the country.”
“You’ll love it. Can’t wait to show you.” He began kissing her neck.
“Everything’s gone so fast.”
“Yes. It has.” He held her chin up leading her lips to his. “Hey, you okay with everything? Truth. Tell me the truth.”
“I’m fine tonight and will be fine tomorrow. When you go back to England, that’s when I’ll fall apart.”
“But not tonight. Are you sure about being okay with my decision?”
She liked that he didn’t want to take advantage. “As long as you’re okay with it. What if you don’t make the Teams?”
“Most people don’t. But I have an inside track, Steph.”
“Really? What is it?”
“Ryan. He told me the secret.”
“You’re kidding. Tell me.”
“I think he meant more than just trying out for the Teams. He meant it about life in general. He said the secret was never to quit. At anything.”
That was like him, she thought. That’s why her going on with her life was the right thing to do, even though perhaps there would be a bumpy road ahead.
He waited for her to kiss him, though she could feel the lodge pole in his pants. She loved that he wanted to be careful with her.
After her kiss, and without saying a word, he led her solemnly to the bed.
His hands were deliberate and sure. Slowly he unpeeled her clothing, kissing her down the back of her spine, sliding his long fingers down her belly to the juncture between her legs. She held his hand and moved her sex onto his palm.
She could hear the sounds of foghorns in the distance, and a bell somewhere further down the beach. Was that someone quitting a BUD/S class? She knew she wouldn’t quit. Patrick’s long, powerful thighs urged her toward the bed, and she heard the bell again.
He turned her, pulling her back into his chest, gently squeezing her breast with their joined hands, and with the other, moved aside her long hair and kissed her neck. Their bodies swayed to a silent lover’s rhythm. His upper torso completely and warmly protected her back. He was aching for her, but aching to know if she could feel the magic he felt.
His fingers slipped up her neck and into her hair as he pressed his forehead against her scalp. He allowed her to hear his heavy breathing, allowed her to feel his erection now reaching the waistband of his slacks. She allowed the fingers on his left hand to smooth their way down her firm abdomen, and breach the top of her skirt. He felt her separate her legs and arch back into him so deliciously so his fingers could easily find the wetness in her juncture. She was willing and open to him in ways he’d never felt before. And her desire for him was rising by the second.
“God, Stephanie. I—”
She’d whispered soothing words to him that tingled and reverberated inside his head like tiny diamond crystals. She melted further into his arms.
His kiss and need to see her expression were crucial. He was reading her as he closed his mouth over hers, as they lazily played with each other’s tongues. He inhaled the warm feeling of her fingers exploring his abdomen, sliding up and under his shirt, her palms to his naked skin, her arms that were now wrapped around his neck, her knees spread to the sides so she could rub herself against his thigh, ride his thigh when he raised it, lifting her and allowing her legs to nearly dangle so the full weight of her body rode him there.
Open your eyes, Stephanie. Look at me. I am real. I am alive and in your arms. Is this what you want? He needed to know it was his body she loved, his body she craved, his mouth she wanted to feel tasting her. When he lifted her chin to him again and brushed her cheeks with his thumbs she did open her eyes.
“Oh, Patrick. I’ve always loved you. Help me to heal.”
Of course he could be that guy. Of course he wanted to help her. And if afterwards the unthinkable happened and they couldn’t make things work, he’d have to be okay with that, because right now it was about Stephanie. And he knew he was the only man who would be able to take away at least part of her pain. Not all of it, but enough for now.
“Are you sure that is okay with you? Just want to be sure you are—”
“I need to feel you inside me, Patrick.”
“Oh, baby, thank God,” he whispered to her lips.
She giggled, like she felt shy. He became shy as well. He thought about the school grounds where he first fell in love with her as a child, and where he’d understood that day he could love her now as a man. That she could be his woman. It had taken him twenty years, and here he was, right back there, standing in the playground of long ago, waiting for her to show up in all her pinkness.
How he’d played that image over and over in his mind over the years. But this time, this night, he would be making her his. It was a dream he’d had for as long as he could remember. He didn’t have to share her with the entire school, or the twenty years of her life it took to bring her back to him. Their past was their past. She was about to give him her present.
She climbed under the sheets, and Patrick pulled them off her.
“I want to see you, Stephanie. All of you.”
She could barely make out his face in the moonlight when he slowly kissed his way down her belly, fingering her sex, making her arch her back in pleasure. His thumb pressed down on her nub, making her cry out in need of him. Patrick was as tender as she expected he would be, yet even more so. His sensual lips kissed her deeply while their tongues played, sending her into waves of need. She wanted to tell him the only thing that came to mind as he worked his way in and out, as his kisses commanded obedience:
More.
Was it possible to need more than to enjoy the sex? Did this need encompass everything about their relationship?
Whatever it was, she would ride this tide of pleasure, and, if she was lucky, he’d stay right with her. He’d catch fire like she was. She wanted to ignite whatever fantasies he may have had at one time in his life, become that woman he desired more than all others. She would not rest until his surrender to her was equal to hers to him.
When at last he mounted her she heard a distant sea bird crying. She heard the water lapping under the pier, the sounds of the metal clanging on the masts of the boats moored there. His breathing was ragged, sounding like waves crashing on shore.
This was right and this was true.
She’d learned how fragile life was and how it could be snuffed out unexpectedly. She was in it for the long haul. She’d face everything she needed to face in the coming weeks and months, she’d do it honestly, and she’d let her love handle the fear of what was to come.
She’d hold this man in her heart, like she held him now. And she vowed she’d never quit.
The End
Sharon Hamilton
NY Times and USA/Today and Amazon Top 100 Bestselling Author Sharon Hamilton’s SEAL Brotherhood series has earned her Amazon author rankings of #1 in Romantic Suspense, Military Romance and Contemporary Romance. Her characters follow a sometimes rocky road to redemption through passion and true love. Her Golden Vampires of Tuscany earned her the #1 Amazon author ranking in Gothic Romance.
A lifelong organic vegetable and flower gardener, Sharon and her husband live in the Wine Country of Northern California, where most of her stories take place.
She loves hearing from her fans:
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Her website is:
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hamiltonauthor.com/
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Life is one fool thing after another.
Love is two fool things after each other.
The SEAL Brotherhood Series:
Purchase Accidental SEAL, (Book 1 in the SEAL Brotherhood Series).
Also available in print and on Audible.
To purchase this short prequel to Accidental SEAL, please click here: SEAL Encounter, (Book .5 in the SEAL Brotherhood Series).
Purchase Fallen SEAL Legacy (Book 2 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Also available in print and on Audible.
Purchase SEAL Under Covers (Book 3 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Also available in print and on Audible.
Purchase SEAL The Deal (Book 4 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Also available in print and on Audible.
Purchase Cruisin’ For A SEAL (Book 5 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Also available in print and on Audible.
Purchase SEAL My Destiny (Book 6 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Available in print and on Audible.
Purchase full length version, SEAL Of My Heart (Book 7 of the SEAL Brotherhood) here.
Novella available in print and on Audible. Full length version available on Audible and Print end of August 2014.
Currently appearing in Hot Alpha SEALs Megabundle. Full length version available September 2014.
Anthologies
SEALs Of Summer
SEALed With A Kiss
Hot Alpha SEALs: Available on Kindle now.
Other Books by Sharon Hamilton
Golden Vampires of Tuscany Series
Game For Love_The Beautiful Game Page 7
