This was real now. After nearly two weeks, I was finally going to see Ronan. I must have picked up my phone a dozen times in the last two days to call him. Once the initial anger had subsided, it had been pure agony being away from him. I had been kidding myself by trying to mask my heartache with indignation. The thought of never hearing his voice again, not being able to hold or kiss him, terrified me. There was a hole in my chest—a gigantic gaping hole. It was empty without Ronan.
I was hollow without him.
I believed we could put things behind us and move on. How could we not? I’d given so much of myself to this man. Why on Earth would I let it slip away forever? I only hoped it wasn’t too late, that Ronan wanted the same thing.
The minutes slowly ticked by, and I couldn’t seem to sit still. So I paced around the kitchen and into the living room in the same pattern. I probably walked five miles.
After a while, the nervous energy subsided and I finally managed to sit on the couch. But when the doorbell rang, I sprang from my spot. Then I approached the front door, smoothing my hands down the front of my dress. My hand shook as I pulled the handle.
Ronan stood before me, rain soaked and shivering, his dark curls falling loosely around his temples. His green eyes dazzled when his mouth turned up into a beautiful smile. My heart pounded against my rib cage. He took my breath away. I grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him inside. His arms banded around my waist, and my body pressed against his damp clothes.
He took my mouth in a deep, urgent kiss. I pulled him closer to warm him. Water soaked through the fabric of my dress, hardening my nipples.
“God, I’ve missed you,” he breathed.
My chest tightened. “I missed you so much, Ronan.” Tears grew thick in my throat, but I managed to choke them down. My hands fisted his T-shirt, holding him tighter, feeling as if I couldn’t get close enough.
We held each other in the doorway, and I wasn’t exactly sure for how long. It didn’t even matter, but the rain had finally stopped.
“Your clothes are soaked,” I said into his chest.
Pulling back from our embrace, he curved his mouth into a sexy grin. “You’re wet too.” His finger flitted across my collarbone.
At the double meaning in his words, a delicious shiver moved through me. Closing my eyes, I took a slow, deep breath. I wanted him, but if we went straight to sex, I feared we’d ignore the problem or fight afterwards, and I wasn’t about to let us become that couple.
“Ronan, do you want me to dry them for you?”
His hands stroked up and down my back. “Sure, but I don’t have any extra clothes with me, so I’ll be naked.”
I laughed at the dangerous thoughts swirling in my head. “No, you won’t be. Tinley keeps extra beachwear for guests in the pool house.” Turning on my heel, I motioned towards the back of the house. Then I led him to through the dining room, into the kitchen, and outside to the pool area.
He whistled. “Wow. This is some impressive place Tinley has here.”
I turned over my shoulder, giving him a nod. I told him a little bit about the property and offered to give him a proper tour. It felt silly talking about these ordinary, trivial things when all I wanted was a total reconnection with Ronan—mind, body and soul.
The “body” part would have to wait a little longer though.
After unlocking the door to the pool house, I showed him the collection of new clothing, an assortment of solid tees from J. Crew, shorts, and swim trunks. Then I pulled out a barstool and waited for him to change.
Moments later, the door opened and Ronan entered the room wearing a black V-neck tee and a pair of graphic print swim shorts. He looked undeniably handsome. Was it possible he’d become more gorgeous since we’d been apart? I stared at the curve of his jaw, and then my eyes landed on those lovely full lips. His glimmering, eyes met mine, and I wondered how I’d lived the past weeks without seeing his beautiful face.
I swallowed past the lump in my throat as he held his hand out to me, and I reached for it. My skin hummed at the contact. Adrenaline slid through my veins, crashing into my heart and pumping it full of that wild desire I had only for him. It made me dizzy, and if he asked anything of me now, I wouldn’t hold back.
“Holliday,” he whispered, running his thumb across my knuckles. “I love you, and it was never my intention to hurt you. I’ve made mistakes in my life, but the biggest mistake I could ever make would be letting you go. Letting you walk away from us without a fight.”
My eyes darted to our joined hands, and the sight nearly had me in tears. From a simple sign of affection, I was about to lose it. It was all too much, but in a wonderful way.
“You walked out on me once.” He paused, his eyes full of emotion. He was hurting, and his teeth grazed his bottom lip. It was almost as if it were too painful for him to speak. “The very thought of another man holding you…kissing you...” He swallowed hard. “And falling asleep next to you at night terrifies me.”
His words impacted my heart with a painful blow. I knew what he meant, because I was sick at the thought of another woman sharing his bed. Or, worse, captivating his heart.
“Ronan,” I said, dropping my eyes to the floor.
“My words are true,” he said, taking my face in his hands forcing me to look at him. “And you know I’d do anything to repair the damage caused by my obsessive desire to keep you safe. I told you I have a deep need to protect you, but that instinct should never cause you pain.”
My hands circled his wrists. “I realize now that you had your reasons for trying to catch Derek in this crazy plan of yours. I think I have to understand that you will make decisions, and while I might not like them, you will always have my best interest at heart. But please talk to me before you try to hatch another harebrained scheme.”
“Understood,” he said. “We belong together, Holliday. You are mine, and I am yours.”
“I love you,” I said, before pulling his mouth to mine for a kiss. “I forgive you. What we have is real, and I don’t want to lose it.”
“Will you come home with me tonight?”
“Not tonight.”
He gave me a rueful smile. “I will earn back your trust, Holliday,” he promised before kissing me deeply. It left me breathless and stars flashed behind my eyes. “Are you busy Saturday night?”
“No, my schedule is wide open.”
“I’m very glad to hear that,” he said, threading his fingers through my hair. “I’d like to take you on a date.”
“A date, huh?”
He nodded, and then his fingers slid over the buttons of my dress. “Yes. Somewhere quiet.” He kissed my neck. “The food is spectacular,” he said, undoing my belt. “At least, that is what I’ve heard.” His steady fingers worked the buttons on my dress as his lips brushed against my skin.
My willpower was crumbling with every tender kiss.
“Ronan…”
Cool air breezed over my skin as my dress hit the floor. He hooked his arm around my waist and lifted me off the floor. His mouth sealed over mine, kissing me. His tongue caressed mine with long, delectable strokes. He put me down and spun me before pinning me against the large windows. The whole world was spread before me—sand, sea, and sky. If anyone was outside, they were getting quite the show, and I didn’t care. I needed Ronan’s hands touching my skin, his lethally hot body pressed against me, and his lips touching mine.
“I need you, Holliday,” he whispered. “I need all of you—every single inch.”
His strong hands drifted up my rib cage, his fingers sliding beneath the fabric of my lace bra and rolling my nipples. I moaned as my head fell back against his shoulder.
“Well, then,” I said. “Are you going to rip these panties off me or do you need me to do it for you?”
He made a rough sound that was part laugh, part growl. “You’re a bad girl, my beauty.”
I unhooked my bra and slipped it off, tossing it over my shoulder. With a wink, I replied, “On
ly for you.”
He pushed me forward, and I gasped. My breath fogged the glass. His hands smoothed up my legs, and then his fingers hooked inside my thong to push it down.
“I think we’ll keep these heels on.”
My hands clutched the sheer curtains for balance. I looked above, hoping to God the curtain rod wouldn’t come crashing down on us. That would have been mildly embarrassing to explain to Tinley, even more so to the ER doctors.
Ronan’s hands slipped over my shoulders, his fingers skimming my back, and goose bumps splashed across my skin. “You’re impossibly beautiful,” he murmured, his lips drifting up my throat. “I want to worship you, and I want the world to know that you are mine.”
“Yes.” My eyes closed, and his erection ground against my ass.
He pushed two fingers inside me, his thumb circling my clit. My eyes opened, and I watched him fingering me in the faint reflection of the glass. His hand left my pussy to slip between us and yank his fly open. He kneed my legs apart, and then he dragged his cock across my ass, teasing me.
“Let me inside you,” he whispered.
I arched my back to give him better access. “Take me. I’m yours.”
Banding his arm around me, he pushed into me, and my breasts pressed against the cool glass. My fingers gripped the top of the window for support.
“Christ, Holliday,” he groaned when my pussy tightened around him.
He fucked me slowly, thrusting deep. My skin scorched, ablaze with lust. After days without him, I knew my orgasm would come quick. I couldn’t stand it. It was too good.
“Ronan, fuck…Don’t stop.”
His fingers dug into my hips as he plunged deeper. I moaned, and my inner muscles tightened.
“Come all over my cock, beautiful,” he rasped, pumping into me harder.
My walls rippled around him as he continued to drive into me, pulling pleasure from every inch of my body. I came hard, screaming through my orgasm.
Gripping my hips, he pounded into me. Then he roared my name, spurting and filling me with his orgasm. He slowed his thrusts after that, and we both took a moment to catch our breath.
“Christ.” He exhaled, rubbing his sweat-soaked forehead against my cheek.
As I stood, semen slid down my inner thigh. Ronan looked at me and grinned. Obviously, he was pleased with his handiwork.
“You look beautiful,” he said, wrapping his arms around me, “and most certainly, perfectly fucked.”
“You’re incorrigible.”
“Actually, I’m just a man in love, and I think I’d quite like to have another go-around with you. We have to make up for lost time.”
“Shower with me,” I said, kicking my heels off.
Ronan followed me into the bathroom. I pinned my hair up as he turned the water on.
“I love you,” he murmured against my lips before grabbing the soap.
He washed every inch of my skin, pampering me, kissing my jaw, my neck, and my lips. Steam curled around us, and the world once again drifted away. Then my arms came around his neck, and he cuddled me close.
“I love you, Ronan Connolly. Now and always.”
He pressed a kiss to my lips. “Forever. I’ll love you forever.”
Ronan
The last day of filming had finally arrived, and the sun had begun to peek above the horizon. On set, I was standing outside my trailer, sipping my coffee, watching the city spring to life. I reached for my iPhone and sent Holliday a message.
ME: I cannot wait to see your beautiful face tomorrow. Have a wonderful day. I love you.
I pushed send, and that was when I noticed that my battery was at twenty percent. So I climbed up the stairs and spotted my charger on the desk. After plugging it in, I sat back in the chair and studied my lines. I heard someone talking outside, and then there was a knock at the door.
“Yeah. Come on in.”
Heather was standing in the doorway. Yesterday was the first time I’d seen her since she’d tried to proposition me in this very trailer. This time, she had a yellow dress on, no trench coat for her to hide—no sultry surprises.
“Good morning, Heather. What do you want?”
“Can we talk?”
“I don’t know, Can we?” I shot back, sarcasm licking over my words.
Yeah, I was being a dick. But, after the stunt she’d pulled, I simply didn’t have time for her theatrics. I just wanted to wrap this movie and be done.
“Ronan,” she sighed. “I suppose I deserve the hostile attitude you’re giving me. But I came to apologize to you.”
“Well, that’s a change of pace. Have a seat.” I nodded towards the sofa. “Can I get you a cup of coffee or water?”
“Sparkling water would be nice. Thank you.”
“Now,” I said, handing her the glass of water, “what did you come to apologize for?”
Heather leaned forward, her blonde hair cascading over her shoulders. She looked pale and thin. Dark shadows circled under her eyes. Shaky hands lifted the glass to her lips. After taking a drink, she stood. She was beginning to have me concerned, which annoyed me. I didn’t have time for her drama and damsel-in-distress act.
“Heather, what is it?”
“Okay. Here it goes…I’ll just come out with it. I was never pregnant with your baby.”
Wait what? Did I hear that correctly? Not my baby?
“What did you just say to me?”
Pacing in a small circle, she began nervously twisting the glass in her hands. Then she repeated the words, which sent a rush of blood to my ears.
“This is hard for me to admit, but I need you to understand something.”
My shoulders tensed, and blood surged in my veins. I wanted to yell at her, curse at her for lying to me. “Understand? Well, Heather, by all means, please continue. Make me understand why you lied to me—about a baby.”
Heather spun back around, tears welling in her eyes.
Fuck! Like most men, I couldn’t stand seeing women cry. I stood, slowly approaching her. She backed away, and the tears slid down her cheeks. Then came the sobbing.
Jesus Christ! My voice was soft and mindful. “Hey,” I said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “You obviously have some heavy things weighing on your mind. Why don’t you take a few moments to gather yourself and then we’ll talk.”
When she glanced at me in surprise, a soft smile crossed her lips. Clearing her throat, Heather wiped her tear-stained cheeks, and I nodded towards the bathroom. She returned a few moments later, still sniffling and wide-eyed. I’d seen this behavior from her before, and I was pretty positive she’d snorted some cocaine in my fucking bathroom.
“Talk to me,” I said, handing her a fresh glass of sparkling water.
“Okay…Uhmmm…sorry.” She touched her nose repeatedly.
Yeah, she’s high.
“It’s just that I…I have been going through a tough time lately and …well, I need help.”
“Yeah, you look like you need help. You’re high right now, aren’t you? And I bet a million dollars, if I took a look in your handbag, I’d find coke and I’m guessing a flask filled with Grey Goose.”
Yesterday, she’d seemed well. Shooting had been a breeze, and neither of us had had trouble with our lines. I wondered if today would be a different story. She needed to pull herself together.
Crossing her arms, she snapped, “Don’t judge me.”
“Not judging you sweetheart. Stating the obvious.”
“Look, Ronan, I came here this morning to tell you that I’d lied about being pregnant with your baby.”
“So, whose baby was it?”
“I was never pregnant.” She swallowed, shaking her head. “There was no baby.”
My eyebrows scrunched together, and I rubbed at my forehead. “But the doctor confirmed a miscarriage, and there was so much blood. You were in such physical turmoil.”
“You poor, delusional man,” she laughed, toying with her necklace. “It’s called acting, and thi
s is fucking Hollywood.” Her arms flew around as if she were conducting a symphony. “Do you really think it was hard for me to find a doctor and pay him to fix a pregnancy test and then confirm a miscarriage? And you can easily obtain pig’s blood. Money buys everything in this town. But in my case, I just turned on the fuck-me eyes and seduced a gorgeous props manager into making me concoction of fake blood.”
I glared at her. “Terrific. So you cheated on me and faked a pregnancy.”
She kept talking. I could see her lips moving, but the lies she’d admitted hindered my ability to understand the words. For months of my life, I’d thought about a child whose life had been stolen too soon. Only to find out it had all been a manipulation—a deceitful lie. Strangling her was not an option, so I’d have to settle for the truth.
“Why did you lie to me about the baby?”
She sucked in a breath and looked me up and down. “I lied in hopes that you would stay with me. I felt you slipping away, and I was insanely in love with you.”
“Terrible fucking excuse,” I shot back, my fingers curling into my palms. “Try again.”
“I was afraid. I didn’t know if I’d survive being alone. Being with you made me feel better. Your love made me feel better.”
“Not to be cruel, Heather, but it was the drugs that made you feel better. The alcohol made you feel better. It wasn’t me. We were not in love. Why can’t you understand that?”
Tears formed in her eyes. “How can you say you didn’t love me?”
“Easy. Like this: I didn’t love you. I cared about you, and when you were sober, you were a blast. But you and I both know our relationship was purely a PR maneuver. To. Sell. Movies.”
She flinched. “You were my anchor, my rock. Back then, yes, I was drinking and taking pills regularly. I was stressed and crazed out of my mind from all the pressure.”
“Back then?” I huffed, pointing to my nose. “Yeah, and I did a bang-up job of keeping you from being swept away. You didn’t want me to leave because who would carry your drunken ass to bed? All of your boozing and pill popping were like an iron anchor weighing me down. I was your babysitter, not your boyfriend.”
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