Nodding, Noel continues, “Her body washed up on the far end of the island later that day. Everyone was out searching all the beaches and coves. And it was Hale who found her. The last person to see her alive and the one to find her. He tried reviving her, doing CPR, but she was gone. And he didn’t want to accept that. When the coroner’s report came back, we learned that she was pregnant. Although he couldn’t have done anything, Hale never forgave himself for not being able to save her and the baby. My baby. And I’ve carried the guilt of not going with her and losing both her and the baby because of it.”
“What a terrible burden for two young boys to live with.”
“So when Hale dropped out of MIT and joined the armed forces and started taking on very risky missions to save lives, we always thought this was his, probably not so healthy, way of paying penance for Maggie’s death.”
“I can see that. Even though he certainly was not responsible for her death and did what he could do under the circumstances to try and save her.”
“So now you can see, when he was able to save you, and save you from drowning no less, I just thought this would be the act that would realign his universe. This time he saved someone he loved. He could stop risking his life trying to make up for it. But the last two times I saw him, he was so down. It was like he was after Maggie. I haven’t seen him that way in years and I don’t understand it.”
Unfortunately, I do. And if I thought my heart had been hurting before, I’m beyond devastated now.
“Noel, I haven’t talked to Hale since like four days after the incident. He wasn’t truthful about something that was very important to me and I ended things.”
I can tell by his blindsided reaction that Hale had not shared any of this with him before.
“So, he saved you. Then he lost you. What he thought he was able to recover ended up slipping away from him anyway. That was a two-times death for him.”
I’m chilled by Noel’s words.
And by the loss of Hale’s second chance.
Halfway through the bottle of wine and three-quarters of the way through the Miles of Chocolate, I check my phone for the three hundredth time. Nothing. The dinner and awards have to be over by now. They usually do some kind of entertainment afterwards, but it’s almost midnight. Beverly has to be dozing off in a chair somewhere, I know it, and Monica is getting some hot scoop. Maybe even from Hale. But no one has gotten back to me. Between what is going on in New Orleans and my conversation with Noel, I am bursting to talk to someone. I have to find out how Hale is.
Looking into the fire, I am haunted by Noel’s story, and the insight into Hale and what drives him. I feel like tonight I learned the key to this man and I haven’t even begun to process it yet.
Maggie. The woman I look like. Noel’s love. Hale’s, too. She drowns and Hale can’t save her. I drown and he saves me. And I leave him. This is just too much to grasp.
At 12:45 A.M. I can’t take it any longer. I’m stalking my living room, a cat ready to jump out of her own skin.
Where are you? I text Monica. Why haven’t I heard from you guys?
Five minutes passes and I’m almost dozing on the couch when my phone buzzes.
We had to save him from the evil Robyn
Hale?
Yes Hale
Maybe he liked it and didn’t want to be saved
No, he loves you
How do you know that?
He told us
He told you?
Yes. We escaped with him
Escaped to where?
His suite. He loves you. He wants you to have his babies.
Was he drunk?
Maybe. But he wants you to have his babies. Four of them.
Tell him to get a surrogate. LOL.
Ha-ha. No shit. He wants three boys and a girl.
Well you can’t always get what you want. Call me.
I can’t.
Why not?
I’ll wake everyone.
Huh?
We all passed out in Hale’s suite. Beverly and I are in the second bedroom.
Where is he?
Hold on, I’ll go check.
Chuckling, I’m picturing Monica tiptoeing through some lavish suite to sneak up on Hale.
My phone dings and there is a picture of Hale, flat on his back, passed out, still wearing his suit.
That is hysterical. How much did you guys drink?
A lot. We came up here to escape everyone and talk and he played bartender. I think he thought getting us drunk he’d get more info out of us. But I think we got more from him.
That he wants someone to birth him four babies?
No. He only wants you to birth them. He feels bad about not making you his number one priority and he wants a chance to do better and take care of you.
I don’t need taking care of.
He’s well aware of that, but he loves you and said he’s learned from his mistake. He wants you back.
When I don’t answer, Monica texts again.
He can’t get over you, Sierra. Sound like anybody we know?
I want to answer, but I can’t. I’m too busy sitting there staring at the photo of him passed out in his suit.
Whether it’s the effects of the wine, Noel’s revelations to me, or hearing that Hale wants me to be the mother of his children, I suddenly need air. With the phone still in my hand showing his picture, I open the back door off my kitchen. Letting the cold air wash over me feels good at first, until the tears begin sending streams of salty water into my mouth and down the side of my neck.
What I had expected from this night, just to get some stories from the awards ceremony and gossip about Hale, was far from what the evening delivered to me. A story of two brothers having their lives destroyed as teens, a man trying to save the world to make up for one falsely perceived failure, my own brush with death and the heroic attempt to make sure history didn’t repeat itself. And another person out there who just can’t walk away from things, can’t let it go.
My stupid heart knows that sentiment too well. My OCD brain has been in cahoots with my heart as I’ve obsessively carried him and the pain around with me.
But I don’t want the pain anymore. I just want him.
Forgiveness sometimes doesn’t come easy. At least not for me. But if he has learned from his mistakes and is willing to change, the compromise of a relationship means forgiving and trying to move forward together.
All the information that has bombarded me tonight has weaved an interesting and unexpected tale, one that in some cases ended in devastation claiming pieces of multiple victims. Yet, I was one of the lucky ones. My body may not have been responsive on its own, my heart may have felt bruised and battered at times these past few months, but I was truly a fortunate one.
I was given a second chance.
Hale Lundström gave me a second chance. And I took his away.
Shaking my head in the cold air I finally understand why things have happened the way they happened.
And now it is time for me to give a second chance.
Dear Mr. Lundström:
I am not certain as to what openings are currently available in your organization, but I am writing to you today to inquire if there is a job that potentially fits my skillset. It is my hope that should you not have anything currently available, that you will consider creating a position for me.
What I seek is a hybrid position of sorts:
From a corporate standpoint, I am interested in building a division that mirrors the spirit in which you originally conceived and built SpaceCloud. Although you have a robust new product development team, this new division I am proposing would be separate, established solely to incubate spin-off technology companies on the for-profit side, and to develop charitable organizations and foundations on the non-profit side that either utilize new technologies, fund entities in a pre-launch phase or help people and planet through the SpaceCloud umbrella.
As one of the foremost successful tech co
mpanies in the world, this would allow you, and your organization, to continue to enhance and give back via mentoring future technology leaders as you foster the entrepreneurial spirit and launch a diverse portfolio of organizations that will have greater success with the backing and expertise a SpaceCloud Incubator can offer.
The second aspect I seek of this hybrid post is for the position of love of your life. While I’ve only had limited experience in this role, I know that I possess all the attributes to achieve extraordinary success in making you happy. My passion, commitment and focus are second to none. Being responsible for putting a smile on your face brings me a happiness I never knew existed, and losing it, has made what I want and what I need a lot clearer. Actually, it turns out that what I want and what I need is the very same thing. You. I just want you. I only need you.
The reality is, without you, I feel as if half of me has been lost. And it is a half that was missing for a very, very long time. I just didn’t know that, until I found you. I know I can search this world a million times over, and if I don’t find my way back to you, Hale, I will never be whole again.
Clearly, this is not the most conventional cover letter you’ve ever received, but then there’s been nothing conventional between us since the night we met. I’m totally serious about both parts of this position and I hope you’ll consider creating a special role for me where I will be able to share in every aspect of your life.
Very sincerely and lovingly yours,
Sierra Stone
I know I could send this via email and he’d be reading it in moments, but there is something about an actual letter on your desk that takes it to another level and shows how serious you are. The outside of the envelope reads, Mr. Hale Lundström, Personal & Confidential.
Riding the elevator up to his Austin office is certainly a déjà vu experience, but when I enter the SpaceCloud reception area, I don’t recognize the young woman behind the desk and she has no idea who I am.
“Hi. How are you today?” I give her a bright smile. “Mr. Lundström asked me to have you place this on his desk.” It wasn’t the truth, but I didn’t want to get into a “who shall I tell him this is from” conversation.
Quickly, I thank her and leave the office. I have no idea when he will be returning to Austin and will actually get my letter. I try and tell myself what will be, will be. But I know I’ll be on edge wondering. And hoping.
I haven’t heard anything back I text Beverly and Monica.
It’s been two days.
He could be in New York and hasn’t even seen the letter. That was a dumb thing to do.
It was a stressful thing to do, but not dumb. I hope he loves it when he gets a letter from me.
He will. He’s going to be so happy you reached out to him.
He’d better be or I’m going to be devastated.
Don’t worry. The letter will make his day.
By day four I’m feeling like an idiot. Maybe he was just telling the girls that stuff just to fuck with me so I’d do something dumb like this. I push that thought from my mind. I haven’t slept in four days because I check my email and text messages every hour throughout the night and that is seriously clouding my thoughts and making me think stupid things. I’ve decided to give it one more week and then shoot an email or a text asking if he’s received it. But for now, I need to let it go and accept the possibility that I need to let him go. Cleanse my heart.
Late morning on day five and my phone rings.
“Sierra Stone,” I answer.
“Hi Sierra, my name is Ellie Connor, I’m with SpaceCloud.”
“Hi Ellie, how are you today?” Zero to sixty in 1.2 seconds. My heart sounds like the motor on Hale’s Lotus.
“Mr. Lundström would like to set up a meeting with you.”
“Okay.”
“Are you available tomorrow afternoon at 3:30?”
“Yes. I can be available. Would he like to meet at the office?”
“I believe so. He didn’t indicate differently.”
“Great. I’ll be there tomorrow at 3:30.”
Looking at my calendar, my afternoon today is free, which is absolutely perfect. I want to feel good when I see him, and I want to look good, too.
“Ginny, I know it’s last minute, but can you squeeze me in for highlights this afternoon?
My hairdresser informs me that she just had a cancellation, and I think, this is no coincidence, this is a sign. The universe is helping me, so that when he sees me, he’ll realize just how much he’s missed me.
Walking away from him, although I had my reasons, is something I’ve now learned I can’t do. Not unless there are no other options and I’ve attempted all forms of communication.
Surprisingly, I sleep that night. Either exhaustion from the nights prior has finally won out or just knowing that either way, limbo ends tomorrow. We will either be together or not, but we will have decided it. Together.
As it is a business meeting and I’ve applied for a ‘job’, I look through my suits, which I have not worn in months. I finally settle on a black and white color block suit, a white silk tank, and a gifted pair of black Louboutins. Going to my jewelry box, I pick up the mermaid and realize I don’t have a chain for her. Ugh. I really wanted to wear that to complete my outfit, to let him know just how I feel and in some odd way I kept thinking she would bring me good luck. Turning her over in my fingers, I slip her into the pocket of my suit jacket. She’ll be nearby.
The man who I thought was a huge douche, who ignored me and acted inappropriately, this is the man my heart can’t get over. Laughing out loud, “Lord, help me.”
Walking into SpaceCloud’s reception area, I wonder if I will see anyone who knows me, but it is only the girl behind the desk and I am a complete stranger to her.
“Hi, I’m Sierra Stone. I have a meeting with Hale Lundström.” Just saying the man’s name gives me butterflies. Will I ever get over the intense onslaught of emotions that permeates my body just knowing he is near?
“Have a seat. I’ll let him know you’ve arrived.
I just want to tell her, oh I’ll go wait in my office. Except I no longer have an office here.
Ten minutes later I’m still waiting, and now I’m starting to get pissed. Another ten and I’m out of here. Showing me who’s in control here, huh Mr. Lundström?
“Mr. Lundström will see you now. I’ll take you back.” I so want to tell her I know the way. But I can’t do that.
His door is open a crack and finally I say, “I’ve got it.” I don’t want anyone else around when we are face-to-face for the first time in months.
Giving the door a light rap to let him know I’m there, I slip in and close it behind me. Hale is standing at the window looking out. He too is dressed for business in a charcoal gray suit and sky blue tie.
Turning to me, I can finally see his face. And in his eyes I see what Noel described to me. Infinite sadness. And a vise tightens around my heart. Did I do this to him?
Cocking my head to the side, I just look at him.
He tries to smile, but it is not a smile.
“Mermaid,” I see him say it versus actually hearing it and he opens his arms.
I cross the space as fast as my Louboutins will allow, but it feels like forever until I get to him. Wrapping my arms around him like a buoy in the tide, this man is going to have to pry me off his body, because I am not letting him go. Finally, pulling my head from his chest, I look up at him and get the Hale Lundström smile that makes my heart race.
Dipping his head down, he rubs his stubble along my jaw, scratching me in that delicious way, as he whispers in my ear, “You’re hired.”
Standing with my bare feet in the ocean, I’m glad my stomach has pulled up the length of my dress enough that the handkerchief hemline isn’t getting wet. The sound of the crashing waves is soothing and today the ocean has taken over nature’s radio station. Even the gulls are quiet this afternoon. I need quiet. Even for just a moment. It’s enough
to recharge my energy.
Letting out a very satisfied, “Mmmm,” when he wraps his arms around me from behind, I lean my sizable weight back into him and am gifted with a rub of his scruff along my neck. “Did you finally get them down?”
“I did,” he laughs, rubbing my stomach in gentle circles.
Turning my head so that I can see his handsome face, “You really are Superman. How can they still have so much energy after that many hours playing in the waves?”
“They’re boys.” He shrugs it off.
“If they weren’t so stinking cute, I’d sell them,” That’s one of my standard teases.
His right hand flies off my stomach. “I’m taking that as a message not to sell her big brothers.” His hand returns to the exact spot, gently massaging where she just kicked.
“Ugh, she’s already a demanding little thing. And look what she’s done to my body.”
His hands move from my stomach up to my breasts. “You definitely are carrying very differently than you did with the boys.”
“Can you say wide load?” We laugh.
“I like it.” His lips are on my neck and his fingers are where they always are when we are alone. “It’s very feminine. You really do look like a mermaid now.” Planting kisses down my neck, he stops momentarily to pull at the gold chain with his teeth, before moving on to my shoulder. He’s making it impossible for me to speak.
“Did your conference call go okay?” he asks without stopping the seduction of my neck. The call was the reason he was solo on nap duty.
“Yeah, fine. I walked them through what they need to do to file with the patent office and they can handle the rest on their own.” I’m melting into him as his fingers twist my nipples harder. I am a second trimester, horny pregnant woman and I would do him right here in the sand if I were sure the neighbors weren’t watching.
“Hale…”
“Yeah, baby.” I can feel how hard he is against me.
“I think we’re at the ‘get a room stage’ here. And we’d better do it quick before one of them wakes up and crawls into bed with us.”
Slave to Love Page 21
