by Ramona Gray
“Ren? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. You need to go home.”
“What?” I stared at him in numb disbelief. “No, wait. I – aren’t we going to have sex?”
He shook his head and I chewed at my bottom lip. “But, you said my virginity was yours.”
His groan and the way he clenched his fists only confused me more. “You need to leave, Rachel.”
“I don’t understand. What did I do wrong? I – if you tell me what I did wrong, I won’t do it again.”
“No, it’s not…” His gaze drifted to my breasts again and he reached down and adjusted his cock again. “For Christ sake, Rachel. Will you just please do what I say and go the fuck home?”
Hurt flooded through me and I turned and fled his office.
Chapter Two
Ren
“You gonna tell me what the fuck is wrong or just sit there and pout all goddamn night?”
My gaze slid to the woman sitting on Jack’s lap. She studied me for a moment before pressing a kiss against Jack’s mouth. “I’m going to have a bath.”
She slid off his lap, twitching a little when Jack gave her ass a squeeze, and smiled at me. “It was nice to formally meet you, Ren.”
“You too, Lily.”
I watched Jack watch her ass sway out of the living room and grinned at him when he finally turned his attention back to me. “Never thought you’d be tamed by a woman.”
Jack shrugged and took a swig of beer. “What can I say, she’s got me wrapped around her fucking baby finger…and she don’t even know it.”
An orange tabby wandered into the living room. It fixed me with a look, found me wanting, and ambled to Jack. A rumbling purr came from its chest as it brushed repeatedly against Jack’s legs. When it jumped into his lap and Jack petted it roughly, my jaw dropped open.
“What the fuck happened to you?”
Jack arched his eyebrows at me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I mean, for the last month you’ve been playing house with Lily “Ice Queen” Carson and you got a damn cat in your lap.”
“I like pussy.”
I snorted and took my own swallow of beer. “Are you and the Ice Queen serious?”
“Her name is Lily, not Ice Queen, and yeah we are.”
“What the fuck have you done with my best friend?” I rested my beer on my knee.
“Oh please, you tryin’ to tell me that if that sugar-won’t-melt-in-her-mouth librarian offered up her virginal pussy on a platter, you wouldn’t be following her around like a dog with your tongue out? I got me a woman that I love. End of story.”
I peeled off a section of the label on my bottle. “You know I’m happy for you, right?”
“Yeah. Thanks, brother.”
I ripped off another layer of label. Jack Williams was the closest thing to family I had. I’d moved here nearly six years ago, determined to start fresh and leave my past behind me. Not two months after I moved here, my shitbucket of a car had crapped out on me. I’d taken it to the mechanic in town – Jack’s father.
Jack’s old man had been an asshole, but Jack was a good guy, despite his fuck-you attitude and his occasional dickish behavior. It was Jack who had gotten a bunch of his high-school buddies to help me renovate the bar after I bought it three years ago.
Hell, it was Jack who had convinced the bank to give me the loan to buy the bar. I’d grown up in the city and the everyone-knows-everyone small town vibe was as foreign to me as streets lined with skyscrapers were to Jack. The bank manager had owed Jack a favour from high school, and Jack had finally cashed it in to help me.
After years of watching my back, of never trusting anyone but myself, it was an almost unfathomable act of kindness.
“So, are you gonna tell me what’s wrong, or do I have to stare at your ugly face all fucking night?”
I rolled the bit of label stuck to my fingers into a tiny ball. “I fucked up with Rachel.”
“Oh yeah?” Jack rubbed the cat’s scarred ears affectionately. “You tell her goodbye instead of hello when you bumped into her on the street?”
I rolled my eyes when Jack laughed. “What? It could be that. Her little pussy has you so worked up, you don’t know if you’re comin’ or goin’. Although the way you’ve been lustin’ after the sweet little librarian for the last three years, I imagine you’re doin’ a lot of comin’. Am I right?”
He made a jacking off motion that I ignored. “I told her that her virginity was mine and that no one else was allowed to touch her. Then I made her cum all over my fingers in my goddamn office.”
Jack leaned forward, and the cat made an irritated meow and jumped off his lap. “Holy fucking shit. You are fucking kidding me.”
I shook my head. “I wish I was. She came into the bar Friday night with Madison. She was wearing this shirt that – that showed off her tits and she was dancing with this guy, and I lost my fucking mind.”
“Hold up. Rachel Banks was showing off her tits? Seriously? The woman dresses like a virginal librarian.”
“She is a virginal librarian.”
“Is she actually a virgin though? I know everyone thinks she is but -”
“She is.” My cock twitched against my jeans. “I was ninety-eight percent certain before Friday night and now I’m a hundred percent.”
“You popped her cherry?”
I shook my head. “No. But she didn’t correct me when I told her it belonged to me. She even admitted that no one had touched her pussy but me.”
“Jesus.” Jack leaned back in his chair. “How the fuck that hot piece of ass has gone this long without even having her pussy touched, I’ll never know. She tries to hide it with her clothes, but that body of hers is -”
“Enough.” My temper was rising. I knew Jack had no interest in Rachel, but the anger was still there. “Don’t talk about her body.”
Jack gave me an assessing look. “Keep your dick in your pants. I ain’t after your girl.”
“She’s not mine.”
Jack laughed and drank some beer. “You’re fighting a losing battle, brother.”
“I’m not. Do I want her? Yeah, maybe a little, but that doesn’t mean I -”
“A little? When was the last time you fucked a woman?”
“What’s that have to do with anything?”
“When?”
I sighed. “Two years ago.”
“Fuck me.”
“No thanks.”
Jack stretched his legs out. “Two years is a long time to go without some pussy.”
Yeah it fucking was, but only Rachel had done it for me for a very long time. I drank almost half my beer in two big swallows. I couldn’t tell Jack that the last two women I’d slept with had looked eerily similar to Rachel. He’d think I’d lost my damn mind.
Fuck. I had lost my damn mind.
“If you made her cum, then obviously she’s into you. Why are you fucking sitting here at my house, instead of getting with her?” Jack asked.
“It’s Monday night. She’s working until seven.”
Jack checked his watch. “So, in half an hour, you go to the library, drive your woman home and fuck the virgin right out of her.”
“I can’t.”
“Can’t or won’t?”
“She’s too good for me. I don’t deserve -”
“Shut the fuck up, asshole.” Jack leaned forward again and gave me an angry look. “Rachel’s a nice girl, but she ain’t the fucking Queen of England. You deserve her.”
“If she found out what I’d done, where I’ve been, she’d -”
“You don’t know what she’d do. You barely fucking talk to her. Why don’t you try getting to know her, you douche? Or, fuck her brains out until she doesn’t care what you did in your past.”
“Rachel’s smart and -”
“You’re smart too. Fuck, you read enough goddamn books to fill a fucking library. Just because you’ve been in prison, doesn’t mean you can’t have the woma
n you love.”
I winced and glanced at the doorway. “Keep your voice down, and I don’t love Rachel.”
Jack bellowed laughter. “Jesus fucking Christ, you’re drowning in that river of denial.”
“Shut up.”
“If you don’t love her, then why are you losing your shit the first time you see another man on her? Why are you telling her that her cherry is yours?”
“Maybe I have a fetish for virgins.”
Jack laughed so hard, that beer burbled up out of his bottle and landed on his jeans. “A virgin fetish?”
I just shrugged. It didn’t exactly make me feel like a good guy, but yeah, Rachel being a virgin got my motor going. Knowing that no one else had been in her pussy, that it would only be my cock she’d ever know the feel of, made me harder than a fucking rock.
I’d spent the last three years fantasizing about taking her virgin pussy. The first sign that she might let someone else have it, had made me lose my fucking head. I wanted – needed – it to be me who took it.
“Look, you know she wants you, and you want her. Take her for fuck’s sake,” Jack said.
“It’s not that easy. Rachel is…special. She deserves to have someone who can give her everything she wants. Not some fucked-up ex-con.”
“She’s a grown-ass woman, she can make her own decision about what she wants.”
“Can we just drop it?”
“All I’m saying, is that if you want to be the one to pop her cherry, you better get your fucking ass in gear. She’s not gonna wait around forever for you.”
My best friend had a point. I wanted Rachel’s virginity, and I needed to take it. I wasn’t an idiot. I knew Rachel had a crush on me. I had ignored it despite my own desire for her. There was no future for us. But I had fooled myself into thinking she wouldn’t give herself to another man. That she would just pine away for me for like she was some princess in a damn tower and I was her knight in shining armor.
Fuck. I was an idiot.
* * *
This is not a good idea, Ren.
It was a fine idea. I parked on the street, locked my car and walked toward the library. I reached into the back pocket of my jeans and touched the smooth sticks. Rachel had left them on my office desk on Friday night, after I had…
My cock swelled against my jeans and I took a quick look around before adjusting myself. Fuck, I couldn’t think about Friday night. I had left Jack’s place and told myself to go home. Instead, I had driven to the library.
There was only ten minutes until the library closed. Maybe, if I was really lucky, Rachel would be alone and I could try and explain what happened Friday night.
Or finish what you started.
Bad idea. Very bad idea. I had just barely restrained myself from taking her in the bar. Taking her at the library wasn’t any better. Rachel’s first time should be in a proper bed with every part of her glorious body naked and ready for my touch. I’d tease her and torment her, make her cum a few times until her tight little pussy was dripping wet. I’d give her my cock and show her just how good I could make her -”
“Asher, you’re really good at this.”
My head snapped up. I’d been so deep in my fantasy about taking Rachel’s virginity, that I’d nearly walked right by the library. Her soft voice had pulled me back to reality in a damn hurry though. Especially when it was filled with admiration and… dammit, that had better not be lust.
I hurried up the sidewalk toward the library. Rachel was standing on the steps talking to Asher Stokes. Jealousy ate into my stomach and I could feel my hands clenching into fists. Fuck, I needed to calm down. I was a big guy and could hold my own in a fight, but at 6’6” and over two hundred pounds of what was mostly muscle, Asher Stokes would hand my ass to me in less than five minutes.
I took a deep breath and reigned in my jealousy. Asher worked for a welding company here in town and from the looks of it, he was just doing his job and repairing the wrought iron railing on the front steps.
“It almost looks brand new.” Rachel hadn’t noticed me yet. Probably because she was thinking about giving her virginity to that asshole Asher.
“Thanks, Rachel.”
My skin grew hotter. Asher was a quiet man, probably the quietest man in the entire goddamn town, so how did Rachel know him well enough for them to be on a first-name basis?
“Do you think you’ll be finished by tomorrow or…”
I felt the hard bite of satisfaction when Rachel finally noticed me. Her cheeks turned pink and she quickly backed up the rest of the steps. “Um, excuse me, Asher. I have to um... excuse me.”
With a final glance at me, she yanked open the heavy wooden door to the library and disappeared inside. Asher turned and studied me as I stalked toward him.
“Stay away from her.” My voice was hard. The giant standing in front of me could probably crush my skull in one massive hand, but I didn’t fucking care. He didn’t get to have Rachel.
“What if I don’t?” Asher leaned against part of the railing.
Why did I get the feeling he was toying with me? “She belongs to me.”
Asher glanced at the door. “Does she know that?”
“Stay away from her, Stokes. This is your last warning.”
A grin hovered on his lips. “Relax. I’m not after your woman.”
I wanted to believe him, but my jealousy and my rage wouldn’t quite let me.
He gave me a look that suggested he’d stomp me like a bug if I got too close, before packing up his tools. I walked up the stairs, yanked open the door and stepped into the library.
Despite my love of reading, I’d only been in here a handful of times, and only when I was certain that Rachel wasn’t working. I hadn’t been here at all in the last year. My obsession had gotten to the point that it didn’t matter if she was working or not, just being in the library made me restless and anxious for her.
I looked around as I walked toward the front desk. There wasn’t anyone browsing the books and Rachel was alone at the desk. Her hair was in its usual bun and she was wearing an ankle-length skirt and a shirt that buttoned to her throat. It was on the looser side, but it didn’t matter. I had seen her tits, had touched her nipples and listened to her moan. The sight of her beautiful breasts in that fire-engine red bra was burned into my damn memory. I stared at her chest, wondering if she was wearing that bra today. I was itching to find out.
Her arms crossed over her chest and she cleared her throat. I lifted my gaze to her face. Her cheeks were pink, and her lips were wet as though she’d just licked them. I could barely hold in my groan when her tongue darted out and licked her bottom lip.
Christ, I wanted to fuck her mouth so bad.
“The library is closed, Mr. Parker.”
I checked my watch. “It closes in two minutes.”
She scowled at me. “If you want a book, you’ll have to come back in the morning. We open at nine.”
“I’m not here for a book.”
“Then you should leave, Mr. Parker.”
“Ren.”
“I – what?”
“What happened to calling me Ren?”
“I don’t think, that is – I’ve decided I don’t know you well enough to call you Ren.”
“Is that so, Rachel?” I leaned over the desk and she licked her bottom lip again.
“Ms. Banks,” she whispered. “You may call me Ms. Banks.”
I grinned at her. All my good intentions had scattered to the fucking wind, the moment I saw her. The moment I smelled her.
“I’ve had my fingers in your sweet little pussy, made you cum all over them, and I’m not allowed to call you Rachel?”
Her mouth dropped open and I groaned out loud. The urge to push her to her knees and fill her mouth with my cock was almost too difficult to resist.
“Don’t – don’t be crude, Mr. Parker.”
“You like it when I’m crude.”
“No, I don’t.”
I jus
t grinned at her. “I have something for you, Rachel.”
“Wh-what?”
My grin widened when her gaze flickered to my crotch. Fuck, she was just the sweetest little thing. I couldn’t wait to be balls-deep inside of her.
“Eyes up here, sweetheart.”
Her cheeks turned an alarming shade of red as she whipped her head up. “I wasn’t looking at – I mean…what do you want?”
Before I could answer, the low voice of Asher came from my left. “You okay, Rachel?”
Rachel stared at Asher. “Yes, of course.”
“You need me to stay while you lock up?” Asher’s gaze fell on me and I ignored my urge to cave his skull in. Like I would ever fucking hurt my sweet Rachel.
“Stay?” Rachel gave him a blank look.
“He thinks you’re afraid of me,” I said.
She blinked in surprise before shaking her head. “No, I’m not afraid of Ren. He’s – we’re…”
“Friends,” I supplied. “Very good friends.”
“We’re not friends,” she gave me a scathing look, “but I am absolutely not afraid of him. Thank you, Asher. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
She gave him a warm smile and my jealousy cranked up another notch. I’d never been jealous like this with a woman before, and I had no idea what to do with it. My instinct to sling Rachel over my shoulder and carry her off to my house while beating on my chest, seemed… unwise.
“Good night, Rachel.”
“Good night, Asher.”
The big man turned to leave.
“Good night, Asher,” I called after him. He studied me, and I gave him a shit eating grin that practically screamed ‘take a swing at me’.
Luckily for me, he just turned and walked away. Christ, I really was trying to get myself a nice, long stay at the fucking hospital.
Rachel followed him to the door and locked it when he left. I considered it a victory that she hadn’t kicked me out yet. I studied her curvy body as she returned to the front desk. She grabbed a stack of books from the desk and carried them to one of the carts at the end of an aisle of books. She set them on the cart and grabbed one to shelve it.
