by Sharon Ihle
"I guess I was more tired than I thought." Josie climbed off the bed and gave her a quick hug. "I'm so glad you came. You look wonderful."
And she did. Not only did Sissy have a new dress with beautiful, intricate beading, something about her entire face had changed. She looked younger, for one thing, and her features no longer seemed to droop. Her hair was still bushy, but she wore it in braids, in the way of the Cheyenne. In fact, she could almost have passed as a full-blooded member of the tribe.
"It looks to me like you're starting to like living on an Indian reservation."
"Where I live don't matter much to me. I'm happy s'all." With a shy little smile, Sissy headed for the stove. "Mind if I help myself to the coffee?"
"Please do." Josie took a seat at the table, eager for a little female banter. "So how are you and Long Belly getting along?"
"Pretty good." Sissy slipped into the chair across from Josie. "We went and got hitched."
"Married?"
"That's right," she said, blowing on the rim of her cup. "At least we're hitched as far as the Cheyenne are concerned. Don't know how legal it is anywheres else."
The legalities weren't exactly what Josie was after. Living with Long Belly instead of going back to a whorehouse was one thing, but actually marrying him, even under the temporary terms she and Daniel had agreed to, was quite another.
"Tell me about all about it. Did he propose? Why did you say yes?"
"Ain't that much to tell," Sissy explained. "He wanted to get hitched and so did I. Then his family dressed me all up, painted my face, and stuffed me with a whole lot, of strange eats. After that I was officially known as Buffalo Hair, woman of Long Belly. Something like that."
She frowned then, looking a little like the Sissy of old. "That's enough babbling about me. I came to find out if it's true that you took a shot at White Bull."
"White Bull?" Josie batted innocent eyelashes. "Who's that?"
"He's the big chief know-it-all in charge of the tribe. He come up here yesterday with some of the elders. Now do you remember him?"
Josie casually looked out the window, feeling anything but indifferent as she admitted, "Oh, yes. Now that I think of it, I do recall a few Indians circling the corral yesterday and upsetting Sweetpea."
"Do you also recall going after them with a gun?"
"Vaguely." At least that was the truth. "And so what if I did? They were trying to steal my buffalo."
"Oh, princess, you cain't mean to keep that animal for yourself. The Cheyenne people worship that buffalo like it's some kind of God."
She'd figured out by now that a certain spiritualism was involved with Long Belly's quest to have Sweetpea presented to his tribe, but Josie refused to accept the idea that she had to give up her own dreams in favor of theirs.
"Why doesn't anyone care how I feel about Sweetpea or how she figures in my future?" she asked, wounded to think that her only friend in the world had turned on her too. "That buffalo is my only chance for freedom. Does she mean that much to the Cheyenne? What if they decide to sacrifice her or something?"
Sissy shrugged. "I don't know what-all they got in mind for her. I just know that Long Belly said I had to talk you into giving her up. I don't think he'd a asked me to do it if it weren't real important."
"And I wouldn't be trying so hard to hang on to her if I didn't think it was real important, too." Josie had a few more thoughts on the subject, but before she could express them, the crazies caught up with her again. She suddenly burst out crying.
"Hey, princess." Sissy reached across the table and patted her hand. "I was just wanting to talk. No need to get all drip-nosed over a stinking buffalo."
"Oh, Sissy," she said, still sobbing. "It's not just Sweetpea that has me so upset. You don't know the half of my troubles. I'm in a family way."
"You're knocked up?"
Josie nodded, and then burst into a fresh round of tears.
"Well isn't that something." Sissy's voice was soft with both wonder and longing.
"It's something all right." Josie couldn't have kept the sarcasm out of her tone if she'd tried.
"You ain't happy about the baby?"
"Hell, no." Grabbing the edge of the tablecloth she'd made out of her chemise, Josie blotted her tears. "How am I supposed to start up a ranch with a belly that stretches from here to Miles City? And what about after it comes? I can't see me rounding up strays with a coil of rope in one hand and a baby in the other."
"I guess maybe pulling out didn't work so good, huh?"
Still sniffling, she said, "Daniel says it was that stupid rubber, that it broke or something. It doesn't matter how it happened—what matters is that my life is ruined."
"Ruined, princess? I can think of lots worse things to ruin a gal's life than a little baby."
Both Sissy's tone and her expression as she stared down at the unusual tablecloth gave Josie pause. She realized in that moment that Sissy was probably thinking of her own lost child and the fact that she could never have another. They were at polar extremes when it came to thoughts of having their own children, but not so different in the area of regret.
"Too bad," Josie said carefully, "that we can't switch our bodies about now."
"That would be the answer to both our prayers." Sissy looked up with a smile. "Since we cain't do that, what are you figuring on doing?"
"About the baby?" At Sissy's nod, Josie shrugged. "Not much I can do but have it, is there? I sure wouldn't want to go through what you did."
"You wouldn't have to this early. Lola's got some French female pills and powders you can swallow that's supposed to rid a gal of what she don't want."
"Without messing up her insides?"
Sissy nodded solemnly.
Josie glanced out the window, noting there wasn't a cloud in the sky, and idly said, "I wonder how much longer this weather is going to hold up."
* * *
When Daniel and Long Belly had finished moving their cattle closer to the ranch, they headed back to the cabin. Feeling hot and sweaty in his buckskin shirt, Daniel peeled the garment off and soaked up the warmth of the sun for the first time in months. Long Belly, who'd arrived shirtless, said, "Will our cattle survive now that the snow is melting so fast?"
"I guess so as long as they're able to get at what's left of the grass. If we get another cold spell and they move away from the barn again, I'll never be able to get enough food to them to help them through the winter."
"We need fences," Long Belly surmised.
Daniel laughed. "First we need the money to build the fences."
"We, our people, also need that buffalo."
"Oh, not that damned buffalo again." Sure he knew what was next, Daniel reined up The Black, then turned in his saddle until he could face his brother-in-law head on. "Did White Bull send you to me?"
Long Belly nodded and quickly looked away. "I am sorry, brother, but yes. My job is to bring the beast back to camp."
"Well, good luck, brother." Daniel turned his back on the man and urged The Black forward again. "Unless you can get Josie to herd the damn thing for you, and near as l can figure, she'll shoot you before she'll give up that animal, I don't see how you're going to get it to go anywhere."
"Broken Dishes will bring it to us if you speak to her on our behalf. She is your woman."
"She won't do a damn thing unless it's her idea." Daniel might have laughed, but right then he couldn't think of anything funny about his marriage. "If you want her to give up that buffalo, you're going to have to talk some sense into her yourself. She's not even speaking to me right now."
Since Long Belly had to already have known that his chances were zero when it came to swaying Josie, he didn't let up on Daniel all the rest of the way home. He jabbered on and on, trying to convince him that his duty as agent to the Cheyenne nation took precedence over a white woman who obviously was not thinking clearly. When Daniel explained why Josie wasn't particularly reasonable at the time, that she was pregnant and none too happy about it
, Long Belly became even more determined to claim the buffalo for his people.
By the time the two men walked into the cabin, Daniel was more than ready to sic Josie on Long Belly, but then he discovered that she wasn't even there.
"What do you mean she's gone?" he said to Sissy.
"Just that. She asked me to keep an eye on your young'uns until you got back. Then she saddled up the mare and rode off."
Daniel threw his shirt across the back of the empty chair. "Where the hell could she be going?"
Avoiding him, not the question, Sissy looked down at her hands and began to pick at her fingernails. "Miles City, I reckon."
"Why would she even think about going there?"
Sissy shrugged, her gaze still pinned to her hands. "I mighta give her a little bad advice."
Chapter 24
She saw Daniel before he saw her.
Actually, Josie spotted The Black first as the animal trudged up the sloppy trail. She continued to watch as Daniel drew near, liking what she saw, the way his hips rolled easy in the saddle and his nude chest glistened in the sun. His black hair was shiny and unbound, free to skim the tops of his shoulders, but she couldn't see his bright blue eyes. Daniel was staring down at the ground, tracking her, the intensity in his expression suggesting worry or even anger. She never meant to cause him either.
Josie hadn't known exactly where she was going when she left the cabin, or even why. She only knew that she had to get away. When she came across a sun-drenched knoll about a mile from the ranch, it occurred to her that what she'd needed the most was simply to be alone with her thoughts for a while. After spreading the mare's saddle blanket over a nice flat boulder still warm from the sun, Josie stretched out on it and let her mind go to work on her problems. Never had she planned to go all the way to Miles City. At least, she tried to convince herself of that.
As Daniel reached the spot where she'd turned the mare up the side of the hill, he reined in The Black, and then suddenly looked up. Obviously startled to see Josie sitting just a few feet away, he threw himself off the horse and headed for the boulder. As he approached, Josie rolled to the ground and ran toward him.
"Daniel," she said, flinging herself into his arms.
He held her tightly, squeezing the breath from her lungs. "Oh, Josie, gal. What are you doing?"
"I don't know," she cried, suddenly awash in tears. "I honestly don't know."
Daniel kissed her face, the tips of her ears—everywhere, it seemed, but her mouth—as he murmured, "Sissy told me that you were on your way back to Miles City."
Ashamed of herself, even though there bad been no censure in his tone or suggestion that he knew why she'd considered making the trip, Josie admitted this much. "I had some thinking to do."
"And?"
"And nothing. I'm still thinking."
Daniel pushed her away and held her at arm's length. "You promised to stay on until spring. I thought you'd gone... for good."
Josie didn't miss the raw emotion in his voice or the erection stretching his tight buckskin trousers to the limit. Following her suddenly fascinated gaze, Daniel looked down at himself, and then up at Josie again.
"I can't help it," he whispered. "I see you, I touch you... and I have to have you."
"Oh, Daniel. If only everything could be that simple." Josie was shaking uncontrollably, and yet she wasn't the least bit cold. "I want you, too."
"For now, maybe that's enough. It is for me." There was challenge in his tone as he added, "How about you?"
He released her then, no longer keeping her from him, but not moving to take her back into his arms either. They stood there-staring at each other a while, a mere foot or so apart, both afraid to step into the flames that enticed as well as threatened to incinerate them. Josie burned for Daniel, feared she might go crazy if he didn't take her there and then, but knew if she went to him first, she'd be surrendering something that went beyond the physical. He was asking much too much of her. In an effort to lure him into doing what she couldn't, she parted her lips and ran her tongue over them, first the top and then the bottom. Her breasts were heaving and her legs were trembling with unholy desire, but she remained firm where she stood.
Daniel's eyes were drugged with lust, his hands balled at his hips in frustration. For a wild, torturous moment Josie thought he was going to step into the flames, then drag her down to the ground with him and take what they both obviously wanted so badly. But then, suddenly, a new resolve seemed to harden the rest of him.
"I'd have followed you all the way to Miles City, Josie, but don't ask me come the rest of the way now." His voice was hoarse with both need and emotion. "Give me at least this much of you. I won't ask for anything more."
Lord, how she wanted to go to him then, to surrender herself wholly and fully to this husband of hers and not think about tomorrow, her dreams, or the despair that washed over her whenever she thought of giving birth to the child in her womb. Something made Josie hold back, made her hang on to her control as if it were the deed to paradise.
Nirvana on earth, the man in the tight buckskin trousers, gave a very curt nod. Then he turned on his heel and headed back down the slope to where he'd left The Black.
* * *
They'd barely gotten back to the ranch before the weather started to turn. Though it wasn't much past noon, the sun disappeared behind rolling dark clouds, and the winds began to kick up. After a hurried supper, Long Belly and Sissy headed back for the reservation, leaving the uneasy family of four alone to nurse their private wounds.
Daniel, irritable and sullen, kept pretty much to himself, excluding even his sons. Two Moons, while more resigned to having Josie around than before, had gotten over the urge to help her with the chores. Bang, sensing the general foul moods of those around him, sought out a corner of the cabin where he sat content to play with a small collection of stone arrowheads.
Once Josie finished cleaning up the supper mess, she slipped into Daniel's coat and headed for the door.
"Where are you going?" he asked, not looking up from the scraps of rawhide he was sewing together.
"Don't worry," she snapped. "I'm not going to steal another horse and run away from home. I just thought I'd go see how the ladies are getting along in the tipi. Is that all right with you?"
"Don't be gone too long," he grumbled. "I don't want to have to go chasing you down in a blizzard."
A cheeky reply was that close to falling off her tongue, but instead Josie decided to let the door speak on her behalf. She rattled the hinges she slammed it so hard, and then took off for the forlorn tipi.
Announcing herself as she stepped inside, Josie said, "Hello? It's just me come to pay a visit."
One of the women shouted something in Cheyenne that Josie took as welcome. Pulling the flap closed behind her to keep the brisk wind out, she headed toward the warmth of the fire.
"Brrrr, it sure turned cold in a hurry, didn't it?"
Walking Strange looked up from the pile of buffalo hide on her lap. She smiled, as if that were enough to keep up her end of the conversation, and then went back to her needlework.
"I hope you two don't mind me barging in on you like this, but it's tons warmer in here than it is in that cabin with Daniel."
Her needle suddenly still, Walking Strange gave off a feminine glow as she softly repeated, "Daniel." Then she quickly went back to her work.
Widows in mourning or not, it seemed that Daniel's brand of sensuality was capable of reaching even these two. Little Skunk, who was nursing her baby, wore the same fleeting expression as her friend, then favored Josie with a slightly amused expression.
"My husband is kind of irresistible," she said, again reminded of her condition. "Lord knows I couldn't resist him. I don't mind you two hankering after him, as long as you don't mind visiting with me a little."
Josie of course got no argument from either woman.
"Good. I'm about to go crazy trying to figure out what I'm going to do and how I'm goin
g to go about doing it. Think you ladies would mind helping me out some?"
They exchanged a glance, a few whispered words, and looked at Josie and smiled.
"Thank you," she said, translating their conversation into the words she wanted to hear. Warm now, Josie slipped out of Daniel's jacket and hung it on a stake driven into the ground near the flap. Then she dropped onto the buffalo rug, careful to sit with her legs sideways, and went on with the one-sided conversation.
"You're probably wondering why I'm feeling so low that I had to come talk to a couple of women who don't have any idea what I'm saying, right?"
Walking Strange smiled, and then did the most curious thing. She bit off the thread she'd been working into the buffalo hide, shook out the garment until it fell into its natural shape, and then draped it across Josie's knees. It was a jacket similar in style to Daniel's, but about half the size and twice as ornate.
"For me?" Josie asked, bringing her hands to her breasts in amazement.
Walking Strange nodded, then pointed to the child asleep in the cradleboard beside her.
"Because I delivered your baby?" She shook her head. ''That isn't necessary. You keep this for yourself."
When she tried to return the coat, Walking Strange crawled over to where Josie sat, took the jacket from her, and forcefully slipped it over her shoulders, making damn sure she understood that the gift was meant for her.
Josie figured that arguing at this point would probably get both of her arms broken. She smiled and said, "Thank you. I don't know when's the last time I got a present—well, yes I do. Daniel made me this nice pair of boots, and Long Belly gave me some clothes and trinkets. Other than that, I haven't been on the receiving end of too many gifts during my lifetime. I really appreciate this. It's not often I get anything new."
She laughed as she thought of her last new item. "I did make a couple of fancy aprons out of my yellow dress. Do you think they count as new? The dress got ruined by soot from Daniel's damn stove, so I figured the material might as well be good for something. How about if I give one of those aprons to you? Would you like that?"
