Safe Word

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Safe Word Page 20

by Christie Grey


  He nodded. “It was embarrassing enough when it happened with women I didn’t have feelings for. But to have it happen with you, of all people...the thought was mortifying. I just wanted to be able to give you what pretty much any other man would have been able to. The last thing I wanted was to disappoint you.”

  Melody leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “Don’t be embarrassed,” she told him softly. “If you can’t, you can’t. It’s nothing to be upset about. If it happens, it happens. If not, I am perfectly content to do other things. No pressure, okay?”

  “You’re just saying that to be nice,” he informed her, nuzzling her neck.

  “What do you mean?”

  “When we were together, you were obsessed with having sex,” he recalled. “I know you didn’t mean to, but you always made me feel so guilty, like I couldn’t give you what you needed and wanted and deserved.”

  As she thought about what he’d said, Melody made a face. “I can see why you’d think that,” she admitted regretfully. “But what I really wanted? What I really needed was to feel close to you. It drove me crazy that you’d slept with your ex but wouldn’t sleep with me. I was jealous.”

  Zane pulled back, looking surprised. “You were jealous of Alexandra?”

  “Yes,” Melody grumbled, scowling a little. “Although to be perfectly honest, using past tense probably isn’t entirely accurate. I hate to admit it because it sounds stupid and petty, but I’m still jealous. She was your first love. How can I compete with that?”

  “Yeah, she was my first love,” Zane replied, emphasizing the past tense. “But there’s a reason we’re not together anymore.”

  “The way you talk about her, you make it sound like she was the total package.”

  Zane shook his head emphatically. “We were really good together in some ways, but there’s a reason it didn’t work out. We weren’t right for each other. She wasn’t the right woman for me. You, on the other hand...you are the whole package.”

  “I am?”

  Melody was on cloud nine now that her fears had been alleviated. She was thrilled beyond belief to know that Zane’s affections and loyalties were with her, not Alexandra. She had been so obsessed with Zane’s past that she had built his former relationship up in her mind until it had taken on a life of its own. It felt good to be free from that.

  “Of course you are, silly.” Zane leaned over and ruffled Melody’s hair teasingly. “You’re my best friend and the most amazing woman I’ve ever been with. Or uh...not been with, if you’re going to be technical about it. But we can try changing that as long as you don’t set your expectations too high,” he added sheepishly.

  “You’re selling yourself short,” Melody told him. “You’ve given me the best sex of my life. So what if it’s unconventional or even if we’re never able to do...certain things? You’re amazing and I can’t stop thinking about you or the things you used to do to me.”

  “Come here,” Zane said, easily picking Melody up.

  He carried her into the master bedroom and set her down gently on the bed. She expected him to restrain her, but he didn’t. Instead, he carefully undressed her, pausing every few seconds to kiss her fingers, stomach, neck and eyelids. He took his time with her, slowly stripping her until she was completely naked.

  “You’re perfect,” he told her before climbing on top of her.

  It was like déjà vu considering that only moments earlier they had been in a similar position on the living room couch. But this time felt different.

  This time all of their insecurities had been laid bare. They had both allowed themselves to be vulnerable and in doing so, they had found acceptance. Zane didn’t wish Melody was his ex – he wanted her for her. And she had no expectations of him as far as sex was concerned. All she wanted was to be close to him, to be loved by him.

  And all the warm fuzzy feelings running through her made Melody ridiculously aroused.

  Melody spread her legs, wrapping them around Zane’s waist. She stretched her arms above her head and hung onto the headboard. He immediately picked up on what she wanted and pulled the red ribbon out of her hair. Then he used it to bind Melody’s wrists to the headboard.

  That small bit of bondage made all the difference. It immediately brought out Melody’s submissive streak and, judging by how passionately Zane began to kiss and grope her, it apparently brought out his dominant side.

  They were like a match made in heaven, complementing one another perfectly. She wanted to submit to him and he wanted to control her – at least inside the bedroom, anyway. She moaned as he slid his hard, thick member inside her, filling her up.

  It was what she had been craving for ages and it didn’t disappoint.

  Even though Zane was dominant, that didn’t mean he was uncaring or selfish. Actually, he was quite the opposite. His movements were slow and controlled and he paused to allow Melody time to adjust to his girth.

  He was bigger than any man she had been with before, but she was so turned on that any discomfort she felt was short-lived. Before long the only thing that registered was her sexual desire. She began to grind her hip against him, raising them instinctively to meet his thrusts.

  They moved together in unison, like they were engaged in a slow, sensuous dance. Then, as their excitement soared to new heights, their movements became harder, faster and more frantic.

  The bed springs creaked beneath them as their breathing grew increasingly labored. Noises Melody had never heard before filled the room – then she realized they were coming from her! Her moans and mewls of pleasure seemed to drive Zane crazy with arousal. He got even harder inside her and began growling in the most animalistic, primal way imaginable. It was so hot!

  Melody tugged at her bonds, not because she wanted to get free but because she wanted to be reminded that she couldn’t. They held firm. She wasn’t surprised. Zane had tied the knots, so of course they held free. She had complete faith in him.

  Pulling out momentarily, Zane grabbed Melody under her knees. He lifted her lower half up, practically bending her in two. The end result was that her ankles were up by her ears, and the position allowed him to enter her at a different and even more pleasurable angle...which he promptly did.

  His thrusts were hard and fast now. Melody was panting like a dog, practically delirious with need. Her hips rose to meet Zane’s, moving as though they had a mind of their own. She wasn’t in control of her body anymore, nor did she want to be.

  All she wanted was release.

  Actually, that wasn’t all she wanted. She also wanted to hear him say it. She needed to hear it.

  Even though he hadn’t told her she had to, Melody gasped, “Zane, please can I come?”

  “No,” he told her firmly. “Not yet.” He began to take her even harder, apparently turned on even more by her unexpected request – and her wilful submission.

  “Oh please, I need to!” she whimpered. Being told no only made her that much more turned on.

  “Wait,” he told her sternly.

  “But...”

  “Who controls your orgasms?” he demanded breathlessly. “Who owns your body?”

  “You do!” she replied immediately. “I’m yours to do whatever you want with.”

  “Good girl.”

  He reached down and began to rub her right where she needed to be touched. Melody held her breath as she felt her entire body stiffen in preparation for the inevitable. He was about to drive her over the edge and there was nothing she could do about it.

  “Oh! Please!” she squealed as the first stirrings of her orgasm took hold. “I can’t hold off any longer! Please let me!” Her belly was tightening rhythmically as were her pelvic muscles. And her toes were even curling. She was past the point of no return and yet she desperately wanted Zane’s permission.

  Thankfully, Zane seemed to understand her need, not to mention the urgency of it. “Come for me,” he commanded, his voice deep and authoritative. “Be a good girl and come nice and ha
rd for me, Melody.”

  His words sent her over the edge. She squealed and struggled in vain against her bonds, writhing and thrashing around. For a moment the whole world stood still and the only thing she was aware of was how good Zane was making her feel. It was ecstasy at its finest.

  Melody was so caught up in her own pleasure that she wasn’t even aware of the effect she was having on Zane. Or at least she wasn’t until he let out a low, guttural moan – perhaps the single hottest sound she had ever heard in her entire life. Then he finished inside her.

  Zane collapsed on top of her then, satisfied and spent. She held him in her arms, still trembling, as they both recovered. It had been the best sex of her life, no doubt about it. And she knew why. It was because it was with a man she was madly in love with.

  Smiling contentedly, she smiled to herself and shut her eyes.

  Melody wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she felt Zane stir on top of her, nor did she care. She would have been happy to stay there with him forever, holding him as he slept. But when she opened her eyes, he was awake and looking at her.

  She brushed his hair out of his eyes. “Hi,” she said.

  “Hi,” he grinned.

  “That was...that was incredible,” she told him earnestly. “And hey, I guess there was an unexpected benefit from stopping drinking,” she added with a wink. Apparently post-orgasmic bliss made her say stupid things.

  As soon as the words left her lips, she wished she could take them back. She had joked around the way a friend would, with no ill intent. But Zane had been so self conscious about his Man Problems that she probably shouldn’t have brought them up at all.

  Inwardly kicking herself, Melody stared up at him, bracing herself as she awaited his reaction.

  To her relief, Zane grinned. “What, you mean being able to finish?” he replied, looking amused. “That has nothing to do with the drinking – I had that problem long before I tried to drown myself in beer. I’m pretty sure we proved that theory of yours right.”

  “What theory?” she asked dumbly, drawing a blank.

  “You told me my hang-up is that I can’t do it with a woman I don’t love.”

  “Oh yeah, I did say that, didn’t I?” she chattered, her face still red. “You really think that’s it?”

  “Melody.”

  “What?”

  “I was saying I love you. I’m in love with you. I have been for ages. Maybe I have been ever since our kiss all those years ago at the Halloween party,” Zane laughed. “But for the record yes, I think your theory is probably right. That said there’s only one way to be sure.”

  “What’s that?”

  “We need to replicate the results...for science.”

  “Are you seriously talking science to me in bed? Oh Zane. Now translate it to English, nerd!”

  “Lots and lots of sex,” he replied, leaning down to kiss her.

  She grinned and gazed up at him from beneath her long, dark lashes.

  “Have I ever told you how much I like nerds?”

  Chapter 26

  “Happy birthday, gorgeous!”

  Melody opened one eye and squinted. Sunlight streamed in through the window, bright, cheerful and kind of blinding. She was not a morning person...never had been and never would be. But waking up to the man she loved every day sure made mornings a lot more pleasant.

  The intoxicating aroma of freshly brewed coffee and hot, crispy bacon wafted up from the tray Zane was holding. That was enough to wake Melody up completely. She sat up and reached for the tray, her stomach rumbling. “Thanks!”

  Zane handed Melody the tray and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. “Nice hair.”

  Melody reached up and felt her hair. It was all over the place, standing straight up in some places and sticking out at strange angles in other spots. She could only imagine how ridiculous it looked, but rather than frantically try to smooth it back into place, she simply tossed her head and struck a pose.

  “Thanks,” she said, looking him up and down. She raised an eyebrow. “Nice boxers.”

  Zane took the opportunity to strike a pose of his own, flexing his muscles as he showed off his stupid happy face boxers. “Oh you like them, do you?” he asked with a grin before leaning down to eat a strip of bacon right out of Melody’s hand.

  “No,” she laughed as he sensuously sucked her fingers clean. “But I like you.”

  “Well that’s good because I am rather fond of you as well,” he winked. “Oh, and if you don’t like the boxers, then I’ll just get rid of them.”

  “I don’t like them,” Melody teased.

  Without warning, he yanked the boxers down and kicked them off. He made a big show of twirling them on his finger before tossing them clear across the room. “Better?”

  Melody’s eyes were glued to his naked body. She would never get tired of seeing that delicious sight! “Oh yes, much better,” she told him. “If it were up to me you would never wear clothes ever again,” she added lustfully.

  “Funny, I’ve thought about imposing that rule on you,” he mused. “I’ve thought about it a lot, because damn, the mental image is hot! Maybe tonight that’s what we’ll do.”

  “Not until tonight?” she pouted.

  “It’s probably for the best that I haven’t taken your clothes away yet. We have plans today!”

  “Oh yeah, that.” Melody wrinkled her nose as Zane reminded her.

  “Yep, that,” he replied. “We have to be at your parents’ place in an hour.”

  Melody groaned good-naturedly. “Do we have to go?”

  “Of course we have to go,” he laughed as he got back into bed and slid an arm around her. “Your mom made you a birthday cake and everything. It’s a big layered chocolate cake. And it smells delicious, so we have to show up. I want some!”

  “How do you know all that?” Melody asked suspiciously.

  “She was baking it yesterday when I was over there.”

  “You were at my parents’ place?”

  “Sure was. Your mom let me lick the icing off the spoon when I was rinsing dishes for her,” he bragged. “Then I helped your dad decorate. You have to act surprised when you see it or they’ll know I told you...but there’s a piñata this year. It’s a unicorn.”

  Melody burst out laughing. “Are you serious?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh jeez...my parents apparently think I’m turning thirteen instead of thirty!” she groaned through a mouthful of the most delicious pancake she’d ever tasted. She didn’t know how on earth she would find room for birthday cake after eating the amazing breakfast Zane had prepared for her...but she was sure she would find a way.

  “Mmhmm, but on the bright side, a piñata means more candy for us,” Zane pointed out.

  “How on earth do you not weigh five hundred pounds by now?” she marvelled.

  “Lots of sex,” he winked. “Speaking of which, I’m going to go run you a bath.”

  “Um, what does a bath have to do with sex?”

  “Come into the bathroom when you’re done eating your breakfast and I’ll show you.”

  “Wait, come back!” Melody called out once Zane was nearly all the way across the room.

  He stopped and turned around. “What is it?” he asked.

  “Come here!” she insisted, beckoning to him.

  He walked back over to their bed and looked down at her expectantly. “What do you need?”

  Melody grinned deviously. “Nothing, I just wanted to watch you walk away a second time. Go slower this time,” she advised, giggling. Then for good measure she added, “You have to, it’s my birthday.”

  Laughing, Zane leaned down to kiss the top of her head. “I’m going to get you back for this,” he threatened good-naturedly.

  “I hope so!” she retorted happily as he walked away, still naked and moving slower this time.

  As she listened to the sounds of Zane drawing her a bath in the adjoining washroom, she smiled to herself. Popping one
last strip of crispy bacon into her mouth and washing it down with some creamy, smooth coffee, Melody set the tray onto the bedside table. Then she snuggled up under the blankets for five more minutes of shut eye.

  She was thirty.

  It was a strange realization, because she didn’t feel any older. She didn’t feel any different at all.

  Since her late twenties – right around the time when all her friends had been getting married and having babies – Melody had dreaded her thirtieth birthday. Rightly or wrongly, she had viewed it as a huge, ugly milestone. She had thought if she didn’t have her whole life figured out by thirty, she would pretty much be a lost cause.

  Now Melody was thirty, and just as she’d feared, her life looked nothing like her friends’ lives.

  She wasn’t married. She had no children and, in fact, didn’t feel like she was ready for babies yet. And she had no real career to speak of, unlike her ambitious friends from school who had credentials after their names and fancy wardrobes and promotions on the horizon.

  Melody had none of the things she had imagined for herself. She had none of the things she’d thought were necessary to lead a full, happy life. And that was alright. Actually, it was perfect. She couldn’t imagine anything better than the life she was living.

  Screw plans. Screw expectations. Melody’s priorities had changed and her goals now were different than they had been in her younger years. Thank God for that.

  Melody was engaged to her best friend and couldn’t be happier.

  Zane had proposed exactly two weeks after she had moved back in with him.

  He had done it in the goofiest way imaginable, filling the entire living room with balloons. When Melody had come home after enjoying a lunch out with her parents, he had handed her a pin and insisted she pop every balloon until she found the prize.

  The prize, of course, had been an engagement ring. He had put it inside one of the balloons.

  Melody had picked it up completely unsuspecting, thinking it was a novelty prize similar to what could be bought from a vending machine at an arcade. But she had never seen a real and completely stunning pink diamond fall out of a vending machine before. She had been so stunned that it had taken a moment for reality to sink in.

 

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