Until the Terraling offered me her cup of milk, shocking me out of at least one of my nine lives.
Mother goddess . . . I could not turn it down. I ducked my head into the stone cup and lapped up the cool, frothy milk as a tear slipped out of one eye and into the drink.
“How long has it been, Peta, since one of your charges actually accepted you?” Smoke asked.
I pulled my head out, milk clinging to my whiskers in tiny white droplets at the very ends. I did not answer Smoke. “That is enough for me, Dirt Girl.”
Dirt Girl gave me the most imperceptible of nods and then drank the rest of the milk down in a gulp.
No idea . . .she had no idea what she’d done. Sharing with me like that, it was a formal acknowledgment that I was her familiar and that she would work with me as a teammate. Putting my needs and knowledge on par with her own.
Could I trust it, though?
That was the question I had no answer to, and the one that scared me the most. Trust.
Could I trust her with my heart?
No. I would not trust her. She may have shared her drink with me, but I doubted she even understood what it meant. I let a slow breath slip out of me. So it meant nothing to her.
And I would let it mean nothing to me.
CHAPTER 3
moke took the Terraling down to wash clothes so they could discuss the problems within the Pit without Fiametta’s spies overhearing. Dirt Girl actually washed clothes while she talked, and I was perhaps a little bit proud of her. Perhaps. At least she was helping while she sought answers. There was no way she could know Smoke struggled with her health. The fire half-breed should’ve known by staying in the Pit she’d suffer as her body craved the windswept mountains of the Eyrie. Still she never left and it weakened her.
I sat in the now empty basket, studying my charge asking about the fire elementals. It was almost like she wanted to know more about someone besides her people.
“There is more,” I said, jumping into the conversation. “Something with the night bells has shifted. People are sleeping longer, and are harder to wake up. I have seen that, too.”
Dirt Girl turned her face to me, her mouth opening as if she would speak, and then she dove into the rushing water.
I leapt out of the basket and ran to the edge, but the Terraling was already swept down river toward the lava flows that warmed the water.
Shifting into my leopard form, I sprinted along the edge to catch up with her. What was she doing diving into the water like that? Was she crazy?
Finally she broke the surface, but she was closing in on the lava. A Salamander I wouldn’t even have gone after, but the Terraling wouldn’t survive the excessive temperature.
“Dirt Girl, swim to the edge and don’t dawdle.”
Her eyes met mine and I saw the heat behind them, how it was sucking her down and sapping her strength. “I’m sorry,” she whispered and the pain that flowed between us was not pain of the body.
Pain of the heart.
Damn her, I liked her too much already to let her die.
The water pushed her toward me and with a snarl I lashed out, digging my claws into her arm and yanking her close enough that I could get my mouth on her other hand and drag her out of the water.
“Dirt Girl. If you decide to go swimming, perhaps a less dangerous place would be good, eh?” I paced by her head, my heart stumbling over what had almost happened. I’d almost failed her. No. I would not feel that worry again. I would not care that her death would matter. “Is it not enough everyone thinks I’m bad luck? To lose you on the first day I’m assigned to you would be the end of my reputation completely. How could I ever show my face again?”
That was not the truth though; the truth was far more upsetting. I’d liked her since I met her in the Deep. She’d defended me against Loam’s insults and those few kind words had stuck with me.
She lifted her hand. “Thanks for saving me. That’s three times now. You must like me.”
Indeed. That’s what I was trying to avoid.
I pushed my life energy toward her, giving her enough that her hands would heal, that the burns over the skin would disappear. Fatigue swept over me, but I was used to it and I ignored it.
That was the price of being a familiar. Losing a piece of yourself on a regular basis to your charge.
“What are you doing?” She frowned up at me, her two toned eyes glittering like the jewels in the queen’s throne room.
“I’m letting you draw on me. That is what elementals do; they allow their charges to be stronger, faster, and heal at a speed that keeps them alive. Or is supposed to, anyway.”
She frowned harder. “Well, stop it. I don’t want to draw from you.”
“Too good to draw from a cat?” I spit out, turning my face away from her as Smoke approached.
Even the Terraling didn’t want me.
That stung.
Smoke helped the Terraling and within moments there was more trouble with the pregnant wife of the Ender Lark killed storming toward us with a group of women.
But it was the way Dirt Girl handled the grieving woman . . . the kindness and the way she took responsibility for her actions that surprised me. Almost as if she truly cared that what she’d done had caused others pain.
And then she used Spirit.
Not since I was a young cat had I felt Spirit and the familiarity of it soothed some of my fears. The Terraling used Spirit quietly, gently, as if it were to be respected and feared.
Smart girl. Even if she was a dirt girl. Her use of Spirit helped me understand a little more about her. The moments of almost connecting with her was because my first charge had been a Spirit Walker.
So it had nothing to do with her personally the moments of feeling close. More of a matter of the past coming back to haunt me.
After dealing with the women, we went to Cactus’s home. Though I doubted he could be of any help to us. He was too tied into the queen and her machinations; I questioned if he would even speak to us.
So when the prick opened his door and we stepped in . . . I was shocked on more than one level.
And then very, very afraid; what Cactus had in his home was bordering on treason.
The greenery that sprouted from every nook of stone was lush and beautiful. Every shade of green I’d ever seen in my life from the deepest of hues that seemed nearly black to the palest of tones that could almost be called cream and everything in between. Added into that were the heavy hanging fruits and flowers scattered everywhere, like explosions of color. The air was cleaner, cooler, and soothed my senses in every way possible. I leapt from Dirt Girl’s shoulder to the ground. Even the rock below my feet was covered in a thick moss that beckoned me to lie down and roll around with abandon.
“Dirt Girl, is your home like this?”
“Parts of it.”
“I could handle being your familiar if this is what my paws get to be on.” I kneaded the ground, my eyelids fluttering. I tipped my face up in time to see the prick plant his lips on Dirt Girl’s.
Mouse turds, this could be trouble. The prick was known to be a flirt, and the reputation that floated with him was that he was happy to bed anything that moved. Though I had no actual bearing that the rumors were true, I had no reason to doubt them.
“Peta,” Dirt Girl scooped me up so we were eye to eye. “Are you really with me? Can I trust you with my life?”
I frowned. Why would she ask me that? Did she think so little of me that I would turn on her? “The mother goddess assigned me to you herself. It is my job to help you stay alive.”
“That’s not what I’m asking.” She paused and I could almost see the thoughts rolling through her. “Peta, are you with me?”
Her emotions swelled, and I pushed at them, keeping myself from truly feeling what she was.
“You’re going to be the death of all nine of my lives, aren’t you?”
“I hope not.”
I snorted and twitched my ears. “I am with
you, Dirt Girl. What are you going to ask of me?”
“Can you get into the Ender Barracks? There is an Ender with a scar on the top of his right hand. I need to know his name.”
I leapt from her hands, bracing myself. Now I had to decide. Would I help her truly or stay loyal to the only home I’d truly known? “What does the scar look like?”
She crouched beside me and turned her hand palm down. The scars on her hand from me grabbing her with my mouth had faded to silvery lines. “Like my scars only thicker, like a bigger cat maybe clawed him.”
I suspected which Ender she spoke of. Coal had been the idiot to challenge Damascus, the Bengal tiger assigned to the queen’s son, Flint. Yet I didn’t tell her his name, and a prickle of guilt nipped at my toes. No, I was being loyal to my people. Coal may or may not have been the problem anyway. There was no point in ratting him out. “He should be easy to find. Why do you want him?”
“He’s a traitor to the queen. If we give him to her, I think we should be able to bargain for Ash’s life,” she said. Cactus gave a low grunt.
“You do not know her very well then.”
Again, she looked to me. “And what do you think, cat? You think the queen will not bargain?”
“Cactus is right. She won’t bargain.” I shook my head, ears twitching. “But it might buy us time if you offer her a traitor on a platter. She likes nothing more than to wield the Lava Whip herself on those she deems deserving of punishment.”
A shiver ran though Dirt Girl. She was right to be afraid. The Lava Whip would kill anyone who wasn’t a Salamander, and the death would be brutally painful. I’d seen it only once, and that was enough to give me nightmares.
“Time is better than nothing,” she said softly. “See if you can find the Ender I described to you. But be careful.”
Her worry over me came through the bonds loud and clear. I bobbed my head and ran down the hallway, my footsteps eaten by the moss, ignoring the warm glow her worry lit in me.
Through the tunnels I trotted, and all around me were those who’d known me for years.
“Bad luck cat, get outta here.”
“Kill anyone lately?”
“Goddess, why’s she still around?”
They were just words, but they hurt as if they were sharp sticks jabbed against my heart.
Hadn’t I done enough? I had asked the mother goddess that very thing. Was it not enough that I’d suffered through losing twelve charges? Most familiars stayed with one, maybe two of those they were set to watch over. Twelve.
Twelve lives.
Twelve deaths.
Twelve times I’d failed my task to make sure they outlived me.
And that was why I had tried to save Dirt Girl in the Deep. I saw in her a strength I had a hard time admitting even to myself.
She was a survivor, a fighter for those who needed her.
But would she survive me and my bad luck? Even I could admit my track record was less than stellar.
The image of her going under the water, her blond hair sucked down and her eyes closing slammed into me like a runaway avalanche.
One day of bonding, and the thought of losing her shook me to the core. Trembling, I stumbled into the Enders barracks. It was empty, not a single Ender walked through the training room.
Breathing hard I searched through the various rooms, looking for Coal while my mind raced. At least I would be able to tell her the truth; the Ender she sought was nowhere to be found.
Dirt Girl could not know how my feelings for her were growing stronger. She would use me, and leave me out on a spindly dead branch to fall from when I needed her most.
With that firmly in mind, I headed back to the prick’s house. Curled up like children in the forest, the two of them were wrapped around each other. The innocence of how they lay struck me.
Indeed, they were like children. Neither had even seen their first century yet, while I’d seen two and a half. If she wasn’t careful, I doubted she ever would see her first century.
I leapt up onto the bed, and she opened her eyes. I held her gaze, hoping she couldn’t see the truth behind my words.
“The Ender you’re looking for is nowhere to be found, Dirt Girl.” I pushed myself under her jaw, curling into the space between her chest and chin so I could rest my head in the crook of her neck. I yawned. “Perhaps he is one of the Enders you killed.”
I knew he wasn’t but I didn’t want her to go against Coal. He was tough, even for an Ender. An idiot to be sure, but still very tough.
The last time that someone challenged him, he’d broken their back and then thrown them into the lava. I did not want that for the Terraling.
I’d been hoping we would sleep awhile, but Dirt Girl stood, holding me tightly to her chest.
Prick swatted her ass.
“Keep your hands to yourself, Prick,” I snapped, feeling more than a little protective. The last thing Dirt Girl needed was to get her heart messed with by him.
I bared my teeth at him to make sure he got the point. No one touched my charge unless she was okay with it. Even if I wasn’t sure of her, I knew my job and what it entailed.
As we walked, heading for Brand’s yet again, we ran into a Salamander I would have wielded the Lava Whip on myself if I could have.
Fay had been Loam’s on again, off again girlfriend. When we’d gone to the Deep she’d taken up with his cousin.
I shifted to my leopard form, and stepped between Fay and the Terraling.
“I’m watching over her, Fay. Leave the Dirt Girl to me.”
Fay let out a low laugh. “Oh, then she’ll be dead within the week. Well done, bad luck cat.” She patted my head—harder than she had to—and strolled away, still laughing. That people would think I had deliberately let my charges die . . . it was the insult of all insults.
Dirt girl reached over and ran her fingers over my head.
“Don’t listen to them.”
The growl that slipped out of me was out of my control. “We are not friends, Dirt Girl. Not by a long shot. I do this because I must.” I shifted back to my housecat form and stalked away, my emotions ranging from the need to be beside her, and the desire to be away from her. To be free of watching over anyone.
Yet I knew that at some point I would have to come to terms with what my life was. One way or another.
CHAPTER 4
irt Girl and Cactus headed for the Pit, and of course I went with them.
At the Pit though, things shifted yet again.
“Lark, do not walk to the edge. Go to your belly. If you get a waft of fumes, you could pass out and fall in,” I said, a shot of worry slipping through me.
She did as I told her, going to her belly. I clung to her back, staying with her. Where she went, I went.
Hanging onto the edge, she peered into the pit.
“Hypnotizing.”
“No swimming,” I muttered softly into her ear.
Without any warning, she wriggled about, forcing Cactus to grab her ankles. Fear laced each breath I took as I dug my claws in deep to her leather vest so I wouldn’t fall. What was she thinking? Had she lost her mind?
None of my other charges had been this reckless . . . no that wasn’t entirely true. The first had been like this.
Yes, Talan had been exactly like this, reckless and bold to a fault. It was why I’d lost him.
I stared at the Terraling’s hands as she gripped the rock. The stone molded under her fingers, making perfect handholds.
From what I knew of Terralings that was an old ability. One that had been lost long before my time even.
“We need to discuss this later. You shouldn’t be able to mold rock like that,” I said.
Using her handholds she flipped over the edge and dropped in a crouch to the floor below the ledge.
The smell of firewyrms overwhelmed me. Dirt Girl leaned forward, cooing softly to two hatchlings. Like tiny, sinuous white dragons, they stared at us, hissing. I could understand them, but the shocki
ng part was, so could she.
How in the name of the mother goddess was that possible?
A thump behind us snapped my head around.
Mouse turds.
Coal, the Ender she thought was a traitor stood behind us. So much for keeping them apart. “Get back, idiot, you don’t know what they are capable of.”
He grabbed Dirt Girl’s arm and jerked her hard enough to send us tumbling ass over teakettle, right out into open space. I let out a screech as I dug my claws deeper into the leather.
No matter what, I wasn’t letting her go. Even if it meant I would fall to my death with her.
A flash of white scales and our momentum was stopped and we were being held above the ground.
The male firewyrm had us and scrambled us back up to the ledge.
What we saw when we peered over was the young female firewyrm lying on the ground, blood pooling around her and staining her white scales; Coal stood over her with his black club raised.
“Get away from her,” the Terraling snapped as she scrambled forward. She called the earth and it threw Coal backward into the wall, smacking his head hard enough to knock him out.
She ran to the firewyrm, laying her hands on her side.
“Spirit can heal, Dirt Girl. I don’t know how, but I know it can. If it isn’t too late,” I said softly. I was sure she wouldn’t try. To use Spirit was to lose a piece of yourself every time you did so. For her to try on a creature of no consequence, someone she didn’t even know, was beyond unlikely.
Dirt Girl closed her eyes and Spirit flickered through her, pumping into the lifeless body. She would try and save her?
Now do you see the value in Larkspur?
I did see it, and it still scared me. More than if she were like the others. Because if she was this strong of heart and soul, this sound of mind and morals . . . how much worse would it be when I lost her?
The answer is simple, my cat. Don’t lose her.
Don’t lose her.
I licked Lark’s cheek, swiping away tears she didn’t seem to know were there. “You can’t save her, Dirt Girl. She’s gone too long. That is why Spirit fights you, I believe. I think she was already beyond your reach.”
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