I feel anger bubble up inside me. “Dad,” I say again, this time sterner. “I think over the years I’ve proven I have my head on straight and that I’m a good kid. It’s not like I’m out dancing on tables or getting drunk. But I am allowed to have a life. I haven’t had one in three years, not a real one anyway, I was too scared and held myself back when I shouldn’t have, but now that I am getting out there you have to let me go. I’m not a little girl anymore.”
He sighs, his face softening. “But, Willa, you’ll be my little girl until the day I die.”
“I know that, but it doesn’t mean I am one. I have to grow up and spread my wings.”
He looks over at Jasper and back at me, his jaw tight. “Okay, fine, but this better not happen again.”
I nod, because if I open my mouth I’ll have to lie. I can’t make that promise to him.
nbsp;He sighs, shaking his head as if he can’t believe he has to deal with this kind of stuff and heads back around the side of the house, leaving the two of us alone once more.
“I didn’t mean to get you in trouble,” Jasper says sadly.
“Don’t worry about him. I’m not.”
He pulls his phone from his pocket and looks at the time. “I have to go. I’m working at the coffee shop today,” he grumbles, stuffing the phone back in his pocket and then running his fingers roughly through the short strands of his hair.nbsp;
“That reminds me,” I sigh. “I need to get a job. I got to thinking—I want to save up and go see those gardens I told you about. The one in Japan.”
His smile is blinding. “Really? I think that’s awesome. Good for you. And as for the job, I can help.”
“Seriously?” I raise a brow. “How?”
“My parents are looking to hire a couple more baristas. I’ll put in a good word for you. Swing by the shop this afternoon and my mom will probably interview you.”
“That would be awesome. Thank you.”
Working at a coffee shop sounds hectic, but fun, especially with Jasper there.
He pulls out his phone and looks at it again. “I don’t have to be there for another two hours—think your dad would let you go to breakfast?”
I shrug. “I can ask. The worst he can say is no.”
Jasper and I make our way to the front of the house and he sits on the steps while I go inside.
“Dad?” I call out and hear a grunt from the direction of his chair.
I tentatively step in front of him and he lowers the newspaper, looking at me over it.
“Yes?” he prompts.
“I was wondering if I could go to breakfast with Jasper.”
He lets out a gruff sigh and I give him a look. Softening, he asks, “Just breakfast?”
“Just breakfast.”
He nods. “I don’t see anything wrong with that.”
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” I cry, bending to hug him.
He squeezes me tight. “Stop growing up.”
I laugh. “Sorry, no can do.”
He shakes his head. “You girls will be the death of me.”
I have no doubt we will be.
I rush up the stairs and into my room, changing quickly out of my pajamas and into a loose T-shirt style dress and tie a plaid shirt around the waist before ditching my flip-flops for my white Converse—although, at this point they’re far from white, but that’s okay, they tell a story.
Tumbling back down the stairs I call out a last thank you to my dad and dash out the door completely out of breath.
Jasper stands chuckling. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I pant. “Totally fine, why would you ask?” I joke, and he cracks a grin.
“Come on.” He holds out a hand to me.
“Where’s your car?” I ask, noting the bright yellow Jeep isn’t in front of my house.
“I parked down the block in case one of your parents woke up and looked out the window. I didn’t think we were going to fall asleep on the beach and give ourselves away anyway.”
I laugh, leaning into him as we walk down the sidewalk. Sure enough, I can see the Jeep in the distance.
“That was smart,” I say. “The parking thing, not the falling asleep thing.”
“I can’t believe your dad’s letting you go to breakfast.” He opens the passenger door of the Jeep for me and I climb inside. It’s seriously a workout considering the height of this thing.
When Jasper slides in the driver’s side, I say, “Yeah, I’m surprised too if I’m honest, but he must’ve listened to what I said. Besides, it is only breakfast.”
“You good with Mel’s again?” he asks, starting the Jeep.
“Absolutely.”
I can’t help smiling to myself. I love that we seem to have these things that are entirely ours now.nbsp;
The drive is short, but even still my stomach is growling obnoxiously by the time we arrive.
I follow Jasper to the door and he pulls it open, letting me go in first.nbsp;
The same booth we sat in before is empty, so I choose it, my butt sliding along the black vinyl.
The same waitress as before appears a few moments later, and Jasper and I both place the same orders we got last time. Him, chocolate chip pancakes and a water and for me blueberry pancakes with a Sprite.nbsp;
The waitress taps her pen against the pad and smiles at me.
“You know, I have to say how nice it is to see this one here with a girl. He’s normally always by himself.”
“I have a hard time believing that.” I laugh.nbsp;
Jasper’s not only good looking, but kind and smart, he’s the kind of guy who cares deeply about his family and friends. I highly doubt there’s never been a girl in the picture before.
“Well, if there ever was one she wasn’t important enough to come here.” She shrugs and disappears.
I look across the table at Jasper and raise a brow. “Is this the time when we have a conversation about former lovers?”
He shakes his head. “I’d rather not.”
“For the record, I’ve never had a boyfriend,” I admit. “Just you—not that you’re my boyfriend or anything you’re … the closest thing I’ve had I guess.”
“I’d like to be,” he says quietly. “But I worry I’m not good enough for you.”
I snort. “You? You not good enough for me? Why?”
“After losing T.J. I’m … not broken, but I’m less than whole and you deserve everything.”
“Jasper,” I blurt, “you do realize I’m the girl who lost her kidneys. If anyone’s not technically whole then it’s me—but, honestly, no one’s perfect. We all have emotional scars. Anyone that says they don’t is a big fat liar.”
He smiles slowly. “You’re right—and I like you, a lot, and I think you like me, so I’d like to see where this thing goes. Do you want that?”
“I do.” I nod. “But I feel like I suck at this whole thing.”
“You don’t,” he promises. “Not by a long shot.”
“So …,” I prompt again. “You’ve never brought another girl here before?”nbsp;
He shakes his head. “Nope. I dated now and then in high school, but nothing serious. I didn’t have the time between school, swimming, and baseball. Besides, no one caught my eye. And last year, college was not what I expected and there was barely time to take a breath let alone go out. People partied and hooked up for sure, but those were the ones not going to class and flunking out. That’s not me.”
“I think it’s awesome you’ve put your future and passions first. Not enough people do that.”nbsp;
“No, they don’t,” he agrees. “But I think most people don’t know what they want from life. I’ve always had a good understanding of what I want. Now, with losing T.J. it makes me realize how important it is to be there for the people you care about. When I was gone at college it wasn’t like I could come home every weekend, but now I wish I had come back more than I did.” He shrugs sadly. “Hindsight sucks, and it is what it is. I know T.J.
knew I loved him, and it’s not like we didn’t talk on the phone or text but … you should still see people. Being there is more important.”
nbsp;“It is,” I agree, feeling a pit form in my stomach.
The pit that always rears its ugly head when I think about the fact that I probably have T.J.’s kidney, and here I am sitting right across the table from his brother, too afraid to tell him. Terrified, because I’m falling for this guy. Falling hard, and fast, and I’m more afraid of losing him than I am of the lie, and I think that scares me the most—that I already care so much. The guilt weighs heavily on me too, that even if it wasn’t T.J. someone died that night in order for me to live.nbsp;
The waitress drops off our drinks and I rip the paper off my straw. I dunk the straw into the clear soda and then take the paper, twirling it around my finger.nbsp;
I’m a liar.
I’m a fraud.
I’m a flat-out terrible person for not telling him, but I can’t now, not yet. Not when things are this good. I know that makes me selfish, but I need to enjoy these moments with him for a little while longer before he hates me forever.
“You okay?” he asks, setting his water down after having a sip.nbsp;
“Yeah.” I drop the paper onto the table, now wrinkled and hardly recognizable.
“You got quiet,” he comments, raising a brow.
“Just thinking.”
He nods. “I get that way sometimes too.” Smiling, he leans toward me from across the table. “By the way, my grandparents are begging me to bring you back. They like you.”
I blush. “I like them too.”
“They’re coming up to my parents’ house for a cookout at the end of the month. It’s like a family tradition. You should come.”
“That sounds fun,” I agree. “I’d like that.”nbsp;
I know it’ll be hard for me being around his family, in fact I can already feel my body seizing up with anxiety at the thought, but his happiness means more than my fear and if he wants me there then I’m going to be there. I can’t believe it’ll be the end of August already. This summer is passing by faster than I ever expected. It’s like I blinked and it’s over.
“Here you go, kids.” Our waitress places our plates of pancakes on the table.
Both of us drench them in syrup and I dig in like I haven’t eaten in a week.nbsp;
“These are seriously the best pancakes I’ve ever eaten in my life. How did I never come here before I met you?” I wonder aloud.
Jasper shrugs. “I guess you were meant to find me first, pancakes second.” He winks, and I can’t help but laugh.
We finish eating, pay, and then Jasper drops me at home reminding me he’s going to talk to his parents and he’ll let me know if they want me to come in for an interview.
My heart beats erratically as I leave him, because if they say yes then that means I’m possibly meeting my donor’s parents.
I wanted to meet them from the start, to thank them for giving me my life back, but as time has gone on the fear grows bigger and bigger. I’m afraid of them hating me for the very gift they gave me, because my life means T.J.’s death.nbsp;
Receiving an organ is a big deal. Whether it’s from someone you know who gives it to you in life out of the goodness of their heart, or someone who passed and had the forethought to think to save others in their absence. It’s not something that’s taken lightly on anyone’s part. I understand what responsibility I have to take care off myself and this organ, because it’s a gift and every day it thrives inside me is a blessing. It’s one more day I get to live like a normal person.nbsp;
“Have a good breakfast?” Harlow calls out from her room as I top the stairs. Perry pokes his head out from her room and runs toward me, rubbing himself against my legs.
I lean into her doorway. “It was delicious.”
“And so was the company?” She wiggles her brows
I laugh. “Yeah, yeah, he’s not so bad.”
“Do you want to go to the pier?” she asks, setting her laptop onto her bed.
I shake my head. “Jasper is going to see if I can get a job at Cool Beans since his parents own the place. I’m going to shower and get ready in case they call for an interview.”
“Oh, okay. I might see if Spencer wants to hang out?” She frames it as a question, biting her lip.
“Doesn’t matter to me. I won’t tell.” I mime, zipping my lips, and she laughs.
“Do you think I’m crazy?” she asks. “For liking him?”
I think for a moment. “No, because if I look back, that first day Spencer spoke to me on the beach … when he mentioned your name his face lit up. I think he’s liked you for a long time.”
“But he’s older than me—he’s going to college.”
“Jasper is older than me,” I reason. “Besides, it’s not like you have to marry the guy. You’re young. See where it goes.”
“You’re right. I’m going to text him.”
She picks up her phone and I leave her to it.
I take a shower, making sure to shave and lather my body until I smell head to toe of coconut. Then, I spend way more time than usual making sure my hair looks decent and not like a wild chaotic mess. I even put on a little makeup, but I only bother with mascara, some blush, and a pink tinted gloss. As much as I want to wear my usual shorts and tank I decide to put on a dress. If I’m going to get a job I need to look decent.
By the time I’m done Harlow is gone and there’s a text on my phone from her explaining Spencer picked her up and they’re gone to the movies.
Perry follows me around the house as I tidy things up in an effort to calm my racing nerves. I hate feeling unhinged like this.
Around noon my phone rings and my heart jolts when I see it’s Jasper.
“Hey,” he says when I answer. “I’m on my lunch break and Mom said for you to come on in. Honestly, I think she wants to meet you. She berated me for not inviting you to dinner one night, but I told her I didn’t want you scared away.” He laughs warmly.
“Oh, I’m sure she wouldn’t scare me away,” I breathe with a hint of wary laughter. “I can head in now.”
“Cool, I’ll be here. The hot tall guy in a lime green baseball cap and black smock.”
“Hmm, seems to me like I’ve seen a lot of guys matching that description at the coffee shop,” I joke.
“Better not have,” he growls playfully, and I hang up.
“Well, Perry …” I look down at the dog and he looks up at me with his big brown eyes, tilting his head as he listens. “Wish me luck. I’m going to need it.”
When I park on the side lot of Cool Beans I take a moment to catch my breath and calm my racing nerves.
Even though I’ve never interviewed for a job before that’s not what has my stomach in knots.
I stretch my fingers in an effort to rid them of the slight tremor they’ve developed on the ride over here. I can’t have them thinking I’m a complete basket case.
There’s a knock on my driver’s window and I scream, jolting in my seat hard enough that the seatbelt locks.
Jasper busts out laughing as I roll down the window and undo my seatbelt.
“Stop laughing,” I groan. “It’s not funny. You scared me.”
“It’s not my fault you’re jumpy.” He bends down, the brim of his hat shielding his eyes from the sun. “You don’t have anything to be nervous about, you know?”nbsp;
I give him a look that says I hardly believe him. Motioning for him to back up, I roll the window up and shut off the car before stepping outside.
He looks me up and down. “Nice dress.”
“If you’re being sarcastic I might kick you,” I warn him.nbsp;
He chuckles. “No, you look nice.”
I let out a breath. “I wanted to make a good first impression.”
He takes my hand and looks down at them, rubbing his thumb against my fingers. “You have nothing to be nervous about.” His striking blue-green eyes make conta
ct with mine. “I know you don’t believe me, but they’ll love you. Besides, Dad’s not here, so you only have to meet my mom.”
I swallow past the lump in my throat, surprised I don’t choke on it.
“We’ll go in the back,” he says, leading me around the lot and to a door painted the same color lime green as his hat. The door leads to a small back area with a love seat and a table with two chairs. “Wait here.” He points to the couch. “I’ll grab my mom from the front.”
As he walks away my heart beats out of control and my palms sweat.
I’m about to meet T.J.’s mom.
Right now, I can’t even think of her as Jasper’s mom. All I see in my mind is T.J. The boy I only saw briefly at the beach one day. The boy I never knew. The boy who might’ve saved my life.
The swinging door across from me opens and a woman around my mom’s age steps into the room. She’s taller and curvy with long brown hair with lighter streaks from so much time in the sun—I can tell it’s natural and not from a hair salon. She’s dressed in a Cool Beans black shirt with the logo across the chest, jeans, and a smock tied around her waist.nbsp;
“You must be Willa.” She smiles, holding out a hand. Her eyes crinkle at the corner, and she has this warm presence. Looking at her like this you wouldn’t know that she’s only recently suffered an incredible loss. “I’m Tessa.”
“Y-Yeah, I’m Willa,” I stutter, shaking her hand and hoping she can’t feel the slight dampness. “It’s nice to meet you, Tessa.”
“Sit down.” She indicates the couch, and I realize after Jasper left I froze and never sat down.
I do as she says, and she pulls one of the chairs up to sit across from me.nbsp;
“Jasper says you’re looking for a job?”
“Yeah—I’m taking the next year off before I go to college and I wanted to work and save money.”
“Awesome.” She nods. “Have you worked in a coffee shop before?”
I shake my head. “This would be my first job. I’ve been … sick the last few years and working wasn’t an option.”
“I see. I’m sorry about that. Well, I see no reason not to hire you. You seem nice and a little shy. Jasper can teach you everything you need to know, and frankly we need the help desperately. I have one last question for you. Are you dating my son?”
The Other Side of Tomorrow Page 24
