by Bonnie Lamer
I roll my eyes. “I am not your dear Xandra,” I grumble. “I also don’t like being referred to as a hybrid.” It makes me feel like some sort of pea plant or something.
“After all we have been through, you will always be dear to me,” Addylyn counters, her smile never faltering.
Not wanting to get into all of that, I decide to abate her curiosity. That will be the quickest way to get rid of her. With a quick glance at Eliana, who nods slightly, I explain, “Eliana holds within her the essence of two gods.” With a smile of my own, I add, “So, you should take her words seriously.”
“Interesting,” is Addylyn’s only reply. I don’t like the calculating gleam in her eye. She is trying to figure out how she can use this information to her advantage.
I am not the only one who picks up on this. Her husband clears his throat. “We will leave you know.” He turns to leave, and to my great surprise, Addylyn follows him out. She gives Eliana one last glance over her shoulder before disappearing through the doorway.
When they are finally gone, I sigh loudly. “You’re going to want to watch out for her,” I inform my friend. “She’s sneaky. And a little twisted in the head.”
“So I gathered,” Eliana nods.
“Despite her husband’s promise, I believe it best all of you avoid the Elves,” Kallen says, directing his statement mainly at the full Cowans in the room.
“No problem there,” Sam says, shaking his head as if to clear it. “I have no desire to become anyone’s slave.” He is definitely a believer in glamour now.
Wrapping her arm around his, Jenna teases, “Except mine.” Sam raises a brow but doesn’t argue. He has it bad for her.
Tabitha rises from the counter and brings her empty cup to the sink. “Perhaps it is best if you make yourselves scarce for now. The more you interact with our guests, the more trouble you are likely to stir up.”
“Hey!” I exclaim defensively. “Addylyn started it by using her glamour.” Granted, my mouth does get me in trouble on a regular basis with other beings, but this time was not my fault.
“And the Sasquatch will likely go out of their way to antagonize you, as will the Centaurs, because they like to get a rise out of you. Which they always do,” Tabitha points out.
“She does have a point,” Kallen, my traitor husband, concurs.
“Fine,” I grumble, but there is a distinct lack of disappointment or angst in my voice. Get out of babysitting our guests? This is exactly what I was hoping for. I try to hide my glee as I head out of the kitchen toward the stairs with the others trailing behind me.
24 Chapter
“Well, I am now officially over my excitement about meeting all these other magical beings,” Jenna grumbles as we enter the second floor sitting room. She is worrying her lip and giving sidelong glances to Sam. She’s more concerned about the Elves and their glamour than she let on downstairs.
“Do not let a bad experience spoil your excitement,” Kallen insists. “Not all races are like the Elves.”
With a deep breath, Jenna nods. “True, all the Fairies we’ve met have been very nice.” Now is probably not the best time to tell her that many of the Fairies do not like Cowans.
Flopping down in an armchair, Sam asks, “What do we do now? Hide in here all night?”
“We could take a walk on the beach,” I suggest.
“Are you fans of card games?” Alita asks.
Before anyone gets a chance to respond, angry voices can be heard from outside. We can’t understand the words, but the tone is very clear. There’s about to be violence.
“Stay here,” I tell the others.
“You are not going alone,” Kallen insists.
“I’ll come, too,” Eliana also insists.
Knowing I won’t be able to talk either of them out of it, I nod and hold my hands out to them. To the others, I say again, “Stay here.” When Eliana and Kallen grab my hands, I teleport us to the large living room near the terrace. I didn’t want to put us in the middle of things without being able to assess the situation first.
As I expected, the trouble is between a Centaur and a Sasquatch. They two races may be trying to work out their problems at the government level, but there is still a great deal of prejudice on both sides amongst individuals. Quinn is standing between them, but with his propensity for violence, I doubt he’s going to make the situation any better. In fact, he’s probably giving them pointers on how best to kill each other.
Peering out the terrace door, Eliana asks, “What is that?”
Since Centaurs are a known image in her realm, I assume she means the other being. “A Sasquatch,” I tell her over my shoulder as I step onto the terrace.
“The Centaurs and the Sasquatch are often at odds with each other,” Kallen explains as he and Eliana follow me out.
I roll my eyes at his euphemism for ‘they wish the other would die horrific, incredibly painful, deaths and disappear from the universe completely.’ Well, if they don’t knock it off and get along, they may both get their wish. “What’s going on?” I ask Isla, who is currently trying to talk some sense into the Centaur involved.
“I will tell you what is going on. That beast insulted my husband,” the Centaur claims. She has a spear in her hand, and it’s aimed at the Sasquatch’s heart.
“After she tried to stomp on my foot with her hooves,” the Sasquatch argues, a sword at the ready. She, at least I assume it is a she since Sasquatch are androgynous and I can’t really tell, says the word hooves like she actually means cockroach infested, fungus laden, snotty nose hair covered, flat, dead rat in the middle of the road. She can really pack an insult into the tone of her voice.
“Oh, then by all means, go ahead and kill each other,” I say dryly.
Isla gives me a dirty look for my sarcasm. “Not helpful.”
“But, Isla, she,” I point at the Sasquatch, “was almost stepped on! And her,” I point at the Centaur now, “husband who she just revolted against because of his sexist ways was insulted! Killing each other and completely destroying our chance to save the universe seems completely acceptable.” Behind me, Kallen clears his throat to cover his chuckle. Sometimes he enjoys my sarcasm.
Because she is a good friend, Eliana joins in with a helpful gesture. “If you want to hurry things along, I could help with that.” She creates two balls of fire that dance in front of her. “Who first?” she asks me.
I tap my chin. “Hmm, which thing happened first again? Was it the almost stepping on or the insulting of the sexist husband?”
“The almost stepping on,” Kallen says helpfully. He is actually enjoying this exchange instead of admonishing me with a glower like Isla currently is. His grandmother shifts her glower in his direction now.
Spoiling the fun, Quinn drops to one knee in front of Eliana. “You are incredible. Tell me what I must do to win your heart.”
Eliana rolls her eyes and says in a most sincere way, “Get up or I’ll use these on you.” Quinn laughs heartily, but he does rise to his feet. He’s not a complete idiot. Close, but not quite complete. Like a jigsaw puzzle with a piece missing in one corner.
Taking a step back so her silky white hair doesn’t accidently catch on fire, the Sasquatch demands, “Who is this fire-wielding demon?”
I can’t help but snort. “I’ve seen Demons recently. She looks nothing like a Demon.”
“Good to know,” Eliana smiles.
“Your point has been well taken. There is no need for such a display of power,” the Centaur insists. She has lowered her spear, but she has not put it in its holder I note. Centaurs do like to be prepared when the Sasquatch are around.
The tingle I get down my spine tells me she is lying. Just as Eliana sensed, only a show of power greater than their own will stop these two races once they start fighting. “Uh huh,” I mutter. Aloud, I introduce them to Eliana and give them the briefest of explanations about who she is.
When I am finished, there is a suspicious gleam in the Sasqua
tch’s eye. “To have such power in a realm that does not appreciate magic. Such a waste.”
Behind me, the Centaur snorts. “Surely, you do not believe she would come to your barren realm.”
“I am quite happy in my own realm, thank you,” Eliana informs the Sasquatch as she lets the fire balls in front of her dissolve.
A crowd has gathered around us. The Elves, Goblins, and Fauns came to see what the commotion was. Two Dragons are making their way down the beach and are within earshot. This seems like the perfect time to make an announcement. “Just to be clear,” I yell so no one can claim later that they did not hear me. “Eliana has every intention of returning to the Cowan realm after this is over. Nothing you say or do will convince her otherwise.” I give Eliana a sideways glance and she nods in agreement. I address the crowd again. “If there is any more violence or threats of violence, you will be forcibly sent back to your realm to tell your people that you are the cause of the demise of the universe. Zero tolerance from here on out.” There is a lot of murmuring in the crowd. I’m pretty sure a few insults are quietly lobbed my way, but I can’t quite make them out. No one openly goes against what I said, though.
The sound of rattling plates gets all of our attention. A large number of Fairies from the palace are coming around the house carrying trays of food. I guess Dagda recruited his kitchen staff to help feed all of our guests. I bet that’s a relief for Tabitha, even if she will grouse about it to everyone who can hear her.
As the Fairies set up the food on buffet tables they create on the beach, Isla thanks everyone for coming to help and welcomes them to dinner. She stays behind to field questions and calm nerves while the rest of us retreat back into the house.
“That’s a lot of hair,” Sam remarks from his position at the window in the large living room. I didn’t really think they would stay put upstairs. They are way too curious for that. “How do they keep it so clean and white?”
“That is a long story,” I inform him. “And the basis for their long running conflict with the Centaurs.”
Obviously, I did nothing to appease Sam’s curiosity. I only compounded it. “I will explain it to you over our dinner,” Kallen promises.
When he mentions our dinner, I realize there are delicious aromas wafting in from the kitchen. Tabitha has been busy. Over the sound of my rumbling tummy, I say to our guests, “I believe Tabitha has prepared some of our favorite Fairy dishes. I hope you’re hungry.”
“No one is eating a thing until you wash up,” Tabitha calls from the dining room. That Fairy has excellent hearing.
The next hour and a half is spent over dinner. True to his word, Kallen gives our friends a quick history lesson in regards to the feuds and bad blood between the various races currently occupying the lavish tents set up on the beach. After dinner, we end up spending a quiet evening in the library. Most of us play cards or curl up with a good book. Jenna searches the shelves for anything possibly relating to the Phoenix.
Kegan and Alita turn in early, shortly after Keelan falls asleep in his father’s arms. “Maybe we can actually get some sleep tonight,” Kegan whispers to his wife on the way out. Funny, that look in his eye does not suggest that he has sleep on his mind. Alita’s cheeks turn a little pink, but her step quickens. Good for them.
Not long after, the rest of us decide to call it a night, as well. We have a long day ahead of us. A day that could be one of our last. Yes, Kegan and Alita definitely have the right idea about how to spend the rest of this night. Sleep is not the comfort I am looking for if my days are limited.
25 Chapter
Not long after Kallen and I fall into a sated sleep, I begin to dream. This is not a typical dream. I was drawn here by a mind other than my own. I suspect I know whose.
In my dream, there is a familiar presence in the distance and I go to her, picking my way carefully through the rushes. Desperately hoping there are no crocodiles hiding among them. Eliana smiles when I finally reach her. “I wondered if Ra would call to you, as well.”
I glance around at our surroundings. We are on the edge of what I assume is the Nile. “Why are we here?”
Eliana shrugs. “I do not know. Ra will show us in his own time.” I try not to grimace. My patience is not as well matured as Eliana’s.
We do not have to wait long, though. Voices travel toward us over the sound of the river’s current. The deep, velvety, very masculine voice of Ra reaches us first. “I knew I would find you here. I was disappointed to wake and find you gone. Are you well?”
The next voice we hear is also familiar. Familiar because it once pounded through our heads while our bodies were practically on fire. The Phoenix. My first reflex is to cringe and wait for the gust of Cosmic Fire. When it doesn’t come, I relax and strain my ears so I can listen carefully to her words. Whatever she is saying must be important if Ra wants both Eliana and me to hear them.
Funny, when she’s not trying to almost kill us, the Phoenix’s voice is actually pretty. Pretty like an Angel’s. I suppose if one is going to make eternal beings, it would be rather cruel to give them voices that are grating and annoying. Who would want to listen to that forever? “I woke this morning to that familiar humming,” the Phoenix is telling Ra. “The sound that my mind creates when I have been dreaming the taboo.”
We can barely see the two of them through the rushes. Eliana is a bit taller than me, so she has a slightly better view. I can just make out Ra moving closer to the Phoenix and wrapping his arms around her. “Tell me,” he encourages.
Even though her face is turned away from us, I can hear the sad smile in the Phoenix’s voice when she replies. “You do not want to hear of the dreams that make me crazy.”
“Was I in this dream?” Ra asks, pushing for more despite her words.
“In a way. I dreamt of love.”
Ra’s smile is so brilliant, I can see it clearly through the rushes. “That sounds like a wonderful dream. Why would that make you crazy?”
The Phoenix sighs. “When you have loved as many times as I have, love and pain become blurred.”
All teasing gone from his voice now, Ra turns her to face him. “Talk to me. Tell me of these dreams of love that haunt you.”
My jaw drops open when I see the Phoenix. She looks like an Egyptian goddess. She has long, straight black hair, her skin is a soft tan, and her bone structure is somehow both strong and delicate. Her beauty outshines that of Cleopatra or Nefertiti. I guess she really can take whatever form she wants, and I suspect she always makes certain she is considered beautiful by each realm’s standard.
Just when I am convinced that the Phoenix is not going to respond to Ra’s pleas, she begins to speak. “These dreams bring themselves into my waking thoughts. They affect how my day will progress, and with the gentlest of nudges, they merge into my perception of reality. Past offenses of lovers long dead become the trespasses of my current lover.
“I try to remember that it is my own imagination to blame. I tell myself this is not real. He would not betray me as others have.” I expect Ra to give her assurances at this point, but he doesn’t speak. He doesn’t want to interrupt her flow of words, recognizing she needs to get them out or she may never speak them to him. “Yes, we have had issues with trust, mostly on my part, and sometimes it feels as if I will never be able to move past them. But, you are a good man. I believe in you more than I have anyone else in my many lives, and I will not let my subconscious make me believe that this is all hopeless.”
The Phoenix turns in Ra’s arms so she is once again facing the Nile. “But, how to turn off the hum after it has submersed itself into my conscious mind. How do I push the anxiety and the fear away? I try to picture my mind rolling those feelings into the shape of small pebbles and watch as I skip them across a muddy river of empty souls who ruined their own chances of finding true love. The souls who were not willing to take another chance when necessary, when the one they love disappointed them in some small way. One is not enough. One chance.
Who could possibly live up to those standards? I know I cannot. I ask for chance after chance. I move between the realms with the ease and grace of a chameleon camouflaging itself from its predators. I ask for trust, but in return must constantly veer from the straight line of truth.”
“Not with me,” Ra reminds her gently.
As if she didn’t hear him, the Phoenix continues. “Who has never strayed from the tight line of the truth, I ask myself. Truth is relative. We all have our own version. I try to make my mind see the reason in this, but despite my own lies, I am still devastated by the lies of others. Even after all this time. I am not the chameleon then. I am the wounded prey. I am the victim seeking revenge. I have done unspeakable things with my power to those who have betrayed me.”
After feeling a tiny bit of her Cosmic Fire, I imagine a heap of scorched bodies left in her wake. I can’t help but shudder at the thought. Beside me, Eliana grimaces. Her thought process is obviously similar to mine.
“How did I get here?” the Phoenix asks herself more so than Ra. “This is not who I am or how I want to feel. I cannot move forward as long as I hold onto the past. ‘Stop!’ I scream inside my head. I tell myself over and over that I do not really feel this way, but I continue to be bombarded with these thoughts. The louder I scream for them to stop, the louder they scream back. ‘We are right.’ ‘Do not trust.’ ‘Run, hide, stay inside your own soul. Do not let yourself be hurt again.’”
After a brief pause to wipe away a tear, the Phoenix continues. “But, what is life without the risk of pain? I have lived enough lives to know the loneliness following such a path. I cannot be so perverse as to say that I do not want love. I am not a fool. ‘Take the risk yet again,’ I tell myself. Each time I know I am gambling with my own sanity, but damn it, I will try. I dig deep inside myself for the courage and the strength to remain on the shore of that river of empty souls, to not let the erosion of the soft dirt beneath my feet carry me away with the current. I take a step back – not to safety, but from it – to learn how to love the scars that make love stronger. The scars of battles won and battles lost. I feel the intensity of the peace making process within me, and sometimes it burns.”
