He gestured to the fruit in her hand. “It’s called a kumquat.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. They’re really sweet,” Luke said, smirking. “Although not as sweet as yours.”
“Stop it,” she hissed, smacking him on the arm and glancing around.
“Make me,” he growled, lifting her face by the chin, forcing her to look at him. His eyes burned as he gazed down at her, bright with mischief and longing. A shivery feeling trickled down her spine as she recalled their last encounter and the attention he had given her, ahem, kumquat. Shaking herself out of his grip, she stuck her tongue out at him, making him laugh.
“What are you doing here?” he asked. “I thought Rose had that big garden in the back for fruits and vegetables.”
“She does,” Jill answered, putting a few of the strange orange fruit in a bag to try later. “But we have a lot of guests right now, so she needs some supplementing.”
Luke nodded. “Want help?”
Jill raised an eyebrow.
“I am an Olympic shopper,” Luke explained with a grin.
“That’s not a thing,” Jill said, chuckling.
“Sure it is. Come on, let me help.”
Jill shrugged. She had to admit that it was nice being around Luke without it being an actual date. He seemed much more relaxed in this environment which brought out his funny side. Jill got the sense he was a real practical joker. He had her in tears of laughter several times before they got to the frozen food section. He was also surprisingly helpful, tossing things on the list into her cart and lifting the heavier items for her.
Luke was enjoying himself almost as much as Jill. It was weird for him to be with a woman doing something as mundane as shopping and not trying to get into her pants the whole time. He still found her attractive, extremely so, but he didn’t feel that urgent need to throw her down and fuck her brains out. He was getting off on just making her laugh. The thought was as terrifying as it was heady.
He had never felt this way around a woman before. It was like Jill was Roger, if Roger was a gorgeous woman with irresistible curves. Which, the last time Luke had checked, Roger wasn’t. It struck Luke, as they walked down the canned vegetable aisle, what was really going on.
She’s my friend, he thought, shocked. That’s what’s different. She isn’t just a would-be hookup. She’s my friend, and I care about her.
The thought was striking enough by itself, but Luke also realized that Jill meant more to him than any random hookup ever could. He realized that he wouldn’t mind walking around the grocery store with her every day for the rest of his life, and that both scared and excited him. He was pretty sure he was falling in love with Jill Martin, and, glancing over at her shining face, full of the laughter he had put there, he was pretty sure she was falling in love with him, too.
Luke wasn’t too far off in his assumptions on Jill’s feelings. Her affection for him grew exponentially with each moment she spent with him. The realization didn’t excite her as much as it did Luke, however, because she still felt strongly for Roger.
She debated between the two men the whole drive home, but she couldn’t come to a decision. More than that, she began to realize that whatever choice she made, someone would get hurt, and Jill hated hurting people. How did she get herself into this situation?
After pulling into the inn’s parking lot, Jill went around back and parked the SUV. She helped Rose and Danny unload the car full of groceries into the kitchen before racing up to her own room for a long, hot shower. Then, after throwing on her comfiest sweats and a baggy t-shirt, she scooped up Kate’s diary and flipped to the page where she had left off, desperate for the distraction.
Ahiga had gone after Niyol, leaving Kate behind. Travel at that time had been unreliable and could take months, so neither had expected Ahiga to return quickly, but a month after his departure, Kate had discovered she was pregnant. Jill followed the entries, Kate’s fear and apprehension growing with each turned page. A knot began to form in Jill’s stomach; she couldn’t shake the feeling something terrible was coming. Finally, it happened. Tears brimmed her eyes as she read:
September 30, 1863
My boy is dead. My husband is dead. Killed by soldiers. Niyol had gotten married in Arizona, and the young girl, Haseya, arrived in the village yesterday to tell me the news. Niyol died saving her and his newborn child. Ahiga found her not long after and tried to bring her back to Utah, but soldiers stopped them. Ahiga fought them off while Haseya ran with the baby.
My love is dead. He will never see his unborn child. I do not know how I will survive this, but I must. Haseya and I planted a willow tree in the backyard yesterday to honor the memory of my warrior husband and my wild son.
Haseya says she must go home when the spring comes. She will take my grandson with her, and it breaks my heart, but I can’t change her mind. I understand, in a way. She wishes to be with her own mother and grandmother. Not knowing if they are okay is driving her crazy. I understand that all too well.
My days pass in a flurry of thoughts about my own future. The townsfolk are growing ever more spiteful, and I fear for myself and my unborn child. They threw six whores from the town two days ago. I offered the poor women shelter here for the time being. It’s a big, empty house, and they have nowhere else to go.
Hozshona checks on us daily. She told me yesterday I should allow the women to ply their trade here and take a piece of what they earn. I have been considering it, but my heart is too heavy to think about these things now. First, I must grieve my men and find a way to live without them. I just don’t think I can. God, take care of my loved ones until I see them again.
Jill wiped the tears from her face, sniffling. She gazed out at the willow tree, a symbol of Kate’s love and grief. At least Niyol had saved his wife and son, so his line hadn’t completely died. Jill frowned as a thought crossed her mind. Scooping the diary back up, she reread the last entry.
Haseya? From Arizona?
“No fucking way,” Jill whispered.
Rose was at her usual place at the kitchen table, humming softly, when Jill found her. The younger woman slammed the diary onto the table, open to the page about Niyol’s death and his young wife.
“Haseya,” she said, a little too loudly, “from Arizona. Rose, is it just a coincidence that this woman has the same name as my mother?”
Rose looked up at Jill, startled.
“The only thing my mother ever said about my father in her journal,” Jill continued, “was how he had renamed her after one of his long-ago ancestors who had survived The Long Walk. My mother wrote down the details he told her in her journal before she died. Pieces of a story of loss and murder that seems very similar to this one. Could this be the same woman?”
Rose stared at Jill. Thanks to the extensive research that her grandmother had conducted, compiled, and stored on that flash drive, Rose knew Jill was the many-great-granddaughter of Niyol, but it surprised her to hear Jill’s father had renamed Jill’s mother. He would have only done so if he had truly loved her—and if he had married her. That didn’t sound like a man who would abandon his child. It was possible Jill’s father didn’t even know of her birth. What could have happened to make Jill’s mother hide Jill’s father’s identity?
“Rose?” Jill asked again, her voice sharp.
The older woman reached into her pocket and tossed the flash drive at Jill. “Yes,” she said. “They are the same woman. You are a direct descendant of Niyol, which makes you my only living family—other than your father, if he still lives.”
Jill fumbled with the flash drive, not sure what to say. “You… you knew?” she stuttered. “Did you know all along?”
Rose nodded. “It was why I hired you. I tracked you down, and I couldn’t believe my luck when you turned out to be a wilderness expert. Even better, you’d already applied for the job! It seemed like a good idea to bring you out here and get to know you.”
“You couldn’t just tell me?�
�� Jill hissed. “You had to trick me? I told you how difficult it was not knowing anything about where I came from. And you still kept this from me? What else have you lied about?”
Rose grimaced.
“Was that stupid matchmaking test just another trick?” Jill asked. “Just another way to draw me in? A way to make me fall for Roger or Luke or whoever to keep me here?”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Rose said. “Anyone in town can tell you my tests are legit. I didn’t tell you about your ancestry because I wanted you to make your own choice about me and this town. I wanted you to fall in love with this place on your own. And… I also wanted to find your father.”
Jill blinked. “Did you?”
Rose shook her head. “I’ve tried, but I haven’t found him. It’s hard to gain access to those records—if you can even find them.”
Jill plopped into a chair, placing her head in her hands.
“There is one other thing,” Rose said. “Since you brought up my test. When I told you about your love personality, I left something out. Something that explains why you are so torn between those two boys. You actually have two love personalities.”
Jill raised her head to glare at Rose. “I’m sorry?”
“You have two very different personalities with two very different needs. One is the romantic personality I told you about. The other, well, it needs passion and fire. Romance means nothing at all without that burning need for each other. Perhaps that’s why you have such a hard time choosing between Roger and Luke. They each satisfy one personality. You need to figure out if either one can satisfy both.”
“How?” Jill asked, her hands shaking.
Rose shrugged. “Try asking them.”
Jill sighed and stood up, striding out the kitchen and slamming the back door behind her without another word.
Rose winced. She could only hope that Jill would come around. She had brought Jill out here to get to know her, and nothing else, but something in the young woman had called out to Rose. Jill had filled a hole in Rose’s life she hadn’t even known was there, and Rose couldn’t imagine losing Jill. Not now, not ever.
Jill stomped into the firehouse, looking around for the two men responsible for driving her crazy. Spotting them, she marched up and grabbed them both by the arm.
“I need to speak with you both. Now.”
Roger looked at her with concern.
Luke raised an eyebrow. “Miss me already?” he teased.
“Shut up,” she snapped.
“We can talk in here,” Roger said, gesturing to an empty room behind him and shooting Luke a nasty look.
Jill strode into the room, the two men behind her. She turned on her heel and gazed at them both for a few moments before everything that had just happened with Rose came spilling out of her. When she’d finished, there was a beat of shocked silence.
“Wait, you’re related to Rose?” Luke asked.
“What do you mean, passion?” Roger asked at the same time.
“Yes, I’m related to Rose,” Jill answered Luke, then turned an annoyed eye on Roger. “I think the term passion is pretty self-explanatory.”
Roger frowned. “We have passion.”
Jill blushed and looked away, biting her lip.
“I’m guessing it’s not the kind of passion she means,” Luke answered, the corners of his mouth twitching up into a smirk. Jill glared at him warningly.
“Yeah, and what kind of passion does she mean, manwhore?” Roger snapped.
Luke scowled but answered him despite the insult, sparing Jill from having to do it.
“I think,” he drawled, “that she means a more dominant passion. Something a little rougher than what you give her. Am I right?” he asked Jill, who nodded, her face on fire.
“You want me to hurt you?” Roger asked, incredulous.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Roger!” Luke exclaimed, exasperated. “Dominant is not synonymous with sadistic. You don’t have to hurt her to show her who’s in charge. Not if you do it right.”
Roger glared at him but directed his next words at Jill. “I don’t know how to love like that, but I can try, I guess.”
“Does this mean I have to be romantic?” Luke quipped. “Because that may kill me.”
“It means what it means,” Jill snapped at him. “What you do with it is up to you. I’m not sure I believe in any of that, anyway. This whole town believes in Rose and her tests, but I don’t know if I can ever believe a word she says again!” Her voice rose as she spoke, and the barely suppressed tears were evident in her voice.
Luke frowned sympathetically. “I don’t think she was trying to hurt you, Jill.”
Jill shrugged and shook her head. “Just let me know which of you is up in the rotation,” she said, a little more bitterly than she’d meant to sound.
She pushed past the two men and stormed out of the station. Roger barely registered her absence, still trying to wrap his head around her sexual preferences, but Luke watched her go, his eyes narrowing in concern. This competition wasn’t as fun as he’d expected.
“I’ll teach you if you teach me,” Roger said a few minutes later.
“What?” Luke said absently, still frowning in concern.
“I’ll teach you how to be romantic if you teach me how to be more dominant in bed.”
Luke huffed. “Did you not notice how upset she was? She feels like her whole life has been turned upside down and all you can think about is this stupid competition?”
“Of course, I noticed,” Roger snapped. “That’s why one of us needs to win this as soon as possible. So one of us can make her happy. Do we have a deal?”
Luke rolled his eyes. “Fine, teach away. It’s still my turn.”
Roger scowled but sat in a nearby chair. “Romance,” he began, “is all about giving your partner what they want, but, more importantly, what they need. It’s about letting them know they are the most important person in the world to you. In short, you have to open your heart and admit your feelings for them.”
Roger smirked, knowing full well how hard that would be for Luke to do, and sauntered off to the other side of the station.
Luke frowned in contemplation. He wasn’t great about expressing his feelings, but he had an idea that might just work. He’d need to call in a few favors. Luckily, he had put out a few fires—off the record—the sheriff’s nephew had caused over the years.
Smiling to himself, Luke took his phone out and called the old man. He knew exactly what Jill needed.
It was a few days before Sheriff John Andrews called Luke back, but when he finally did, the older man had only good news to share.
“It wasn’t easy to dig up,” he told Luke. “But I found him.”
“Thanks, Sheriff,” Luke replied, excitement climbing in his throat.
“No problem, son. I’ll drop off the information in an hour or so. You at the station?”
“Yeah. I’ll be here for another hour or two.”
“Good. See you soon.”
Luke hung up the phone and texted Jill, letting her know he needed to speak with her and Rose about an important matter.
A couple hours later, Luke collapsed into a chair at the inn’s kitchen table. Jill sat across from him with Rose next to her. A pitcher of lemonade rested on the table between them. Rose busied herself with filling all their glasses, and Luke fiddled with his when she slid it toward him. Jill studied him, noting his obvious discomfort.
“What did you want to talk about, Luke?” Jill asked softly.
Luke cleared his throat. “I did something,” he began nervously. Before, he’d been sure this was the right thing to do, but now, he wasn’t so sure. He didn’t know how Jill would take the news. He remembered from their talk on the cliff she had wanted desperately to find out where she had come from, but that was years ago. What if she had changed her mind?
“What did you do?” Rose asked, bemused.
Jill glanced at her and then away. It was clear she was still mo
re than irritated with Rose for keeping their connection secret.
Luke swallowed. “I found your father, Jill,” he blurted louder than he’d intended. He cleared his throat. “I found your father,” he repeated in a softer, more measured tone.
Jill blinked at him.
“You did what?” Rose breathed.
“How?” Jill asked before Luke could answer Rose’s question.
Luke looked at Jill, reaching across the table to take her hands in his. “When you told me of your relation to Rose, I realized that might be a way to get information regarding Niyol and his family. It took a lot of calls and a giant favor from Sheriff Andrews, but the Navajo Nation pulled through. They worked backward through Rose’s line… and they found him.” He passed the folder he’d been holding across the table to Jill, who took it gingerly into her hands.
“Luke, I…” she began, tears welling in her eyes.
“He’s in Kayenta, Arizona. It’s just four hours from here,” Luke continued. “His name is Niyol,” he added, glancing at Rose.
“I can’t believe he’s alive,” Jill said. Her face fell. “Why didn’t he come for me?”
Luke shrugged. “Maybe he didn’t know about you,” he offered. He stood up and walked around to her side of the table, kneeling next to her and taking her hands in his. “Or maybe he thought you would be better off with your adoptive parents after your mother died.”
“Or maybe he just didn’t want me,” Jill said bitterly.
“Maybe,” Luke acknowledged. “But you’ll never know unless you ask.”
Jill didn’t say anything.
“Jill,” Luke said, pulling her face toward him and looking deep into her eyes. “Just so you know, I didn’t do this to win a stupid contest. I didn’t do this to get in your pants or even to sway your opinion of me. I did this because I know what it’s like to lie awake at night and wonder if your father thinks about you. I know what it’s like to have questions you know will never be answered. And I know what it’s like to carry around a weight so heavy you think it might crush you. I did this because nobody deserves to have that weight on their shoulders. Every child should know their parents, should know the story of their past. I wanted to give you the chance to know yours.”
Destiny: AN MFM Romance Page 11
