He looked down and tried to locate the bullet once more. He didn’t have much longer to live. Oh there it is, he thought and grabbed the metal out with the clasps. Aaron started to close the mayor up, and then the rest would be between the mayor and God.
Aaron washed up after the surgery. Still telling them the same answer. “Only time will tell now.” He walked to his office. He wanted to get back to the paper and find the classified again.
Sitting at his desk he got the paper and read her classified.
I am a 24 year old woman, living in Raleigh, North Carolina. My parents are both gone and I have very little money to live on. I would like to offer my hand in marriage to any willing man who is interested. Please be serious about a marriage though before you contact me, I am not a woman for sale for sex only. I don’t care which territory or state you live in, my name is Deanna Kahn, my address is 22 West 3rd, Raleigh, North Carolina. I look forward to hearing from you.
Well he didn’t know what had seemed so overly special about it earlier. Now that he had been through the stress of that surgery he seemed to think more clearly. Maybe it was her age? She was a little older and she wouldn’t be so immature. That must be it, he thought.
He thought of his reply and how he would word it back to her. While he wasn’t sure if he would love someone he had never meant, it was possible, he guessed. But Aaron had never been one to believe in love at first sight.
He had sisters when he grew up and he had listened to them as they would read him stories as a young boy. As they got older, his sisters would talk to him. Tell him how romance seemed for a female. How his older sister had sworn she had loved her new husband the first moment she had laid eyes on him.
Aaron figured it would only be something the fairer sex would be able to experience. He was always taught to be the tough boy. The one who would never show how he felt to anyone. Not to another man even, especially. But a female, he had been taught to respect.
Though love was a long shot in his mind, in his heart there was a slight glimmer of light. The hope burned deep down inside of him, still hidden from the world.
He could picture a woman with the right upbringing being a good catch. She is older, and she won’t be so inexperienced in life. He wondered if Deanna had sex before in her life. It was a question that he didn’t really know if he cared.
Aaron had a few women in the past, he was 26 after all. Who would expect a man to not get a little every now and then? He smiled and thought of what it would be like to have a wife though. One female who you could share everything with. He had to admit he liked the thought of it.
Hello Deanna,
I would like to pay for you to come to Tombstone, Arizona. I am 26, have black hair, and I’m a doctor.
He looked at it again. It seemed so distant, like he didn’t know what to say. He might seem a bit cold in the message. But what all could he say over the telegraph? He still needed to see her in person to know how he might feel.
Finally, he shrugged his shoulders and sent it the way it was.
Chapter 3
Deanna was working the next day at the library. She looked up as the delivery boy from the telegram place stood. He nodded at her. She got up and went over to him.
“Yes, can I help you?” She asked him.
He handed her the paper and she read it.
“I’m supposed to wait for a reply ma’am.” He stated when she looked at him.
“Oh, I’m sorry.” She thought quickly. This was the life she had always wanted, now was the time to jump. “Tell him yes.”, she said and walked back to her desk to get her money.
“Ma’am he paid for it already.”, the boy said and walked out the door.
Well that’s nice at least. She smiled and wondered who Aaron Zend was and what life as a doctor’s wife in Tombstone would be! Her blood boiled with an untold excitement. It coursed quickly through her body; she was ready to go now, if she could.
She could barely remember the description he had said of himself. When she thought of Aaron, she had no picture. It was funny; it was the draw of going to Arizona that had enticed her the most. She hadn’t even cared what he did; he could have been an outlaw for all she cared.
Then she thought how exciting it would be to be on the run with a man. But then she pulled back and thought that might be a bit too much for even me. Deanna laughed though, because for a second she had actually considered it as fun.
The boy came back not much longer with a reply and a ticket that had been bought for her. She looked at the date on the ticket. He had given her until tomorrow to be ready. She tipped the boy and sent him off.
Not many people were in the library right now. So she left and got ready. She had no idea what to take along, and how to get it with her. Then she wondered how long of a trip would this be? She picked up the ticket again and looked at it once more.
It didn’t have a time that she would get to Tombstone or a date. How fast does the train travel? She thought to some books she had read in the library. Though she had enjoyed reading some of the more historical books. She hadn’t really read about trains and how fast they went.
Lately, she had been turning to the stories of overseas. Just to travel, anywhere, she had often thought as she read the books.
Thankfully, she had a few that she would be able to take along. The stories will keep me entertained as I travel to him. Then she thought about it, she would soon be Deanna Zend. After all she had agreed to marry him.
“I’m going to be married.”, she thought and sat on the bed.
She wanted to dream about this moment. It would be a start to a brand new life! She couldn’t help but be a little apprehensive about the trip. However, there was part of her that was hoping to find love as well as adventure.
It had always been something she had wished to have in the past. To have someone love you so much, that they wouldn’t hurt you. The sadness of her youth came rushing into her mind. She had cried in the corner many times, “Please momma, don’t hit me.” She had held up her hands many times in defense of the blows that would come.
“I told you about getting your dresses all dirty.”, her mother had chastised her.
Deanna had only been 3 at the time. “But I like to play outside.”, she had cried to her mother.
It had earned another hit to the side of her face. The tears came streaming down her face as she thought of the memory. But she didn’t count on love to come to her. At least she would be able to go and climb mountains, to do things. She wondered just how dangerous it was in Tombstone. She had read the stories coming out of there before.
She got excited about the chance to witness something dangerous and amazing. But she didn’t want to get too close to it either. I’ll be a doctor’s wife, she smiled.
Oh I hope he loves me, she sighed and wished. Just to have someone who only wants me, and won’t hit me. Someone who will know that I simply want them to love me. I don’t ask anything else from them; well yes honesty is a must. I want to be able to tell them what I really want from life. I want to be able to tell Aaron that I want to climb mountains, to live a life on the edge. She thought it would be nice to have something special.
She packed the guilty pleasure she had brought along. It was a romance, something that she would read from time to time. Though her mother had told her she swore Deanna should have been born a boy many times, she was still female.
Love would be nice to find. She was done packing now it was just waiting for the time of the trip. She looked at her wristwatch and saw she had just a few minutes go. For now she would let the hopes of love be part of her thoughts. She knew that she mustn’t expect too much though. After all maybe her mother was right; no one would ever love her. Deanna had heard it enough as a child to believe it might be true.
Settling into the carriage she took out the romance book. As she read her fears built a little. What if he expects a proper girl? One that only wants to play dress up and be pretty? Her heart beat a path of sa
dness down her hopes. She knew that her mother would be right in the long run, but she still hoped a little that there would be a person out there who could love her.
She had been told they would be there later that night when she had boarded the train. She wanted to let her hopes be elevated for a while longer. Deanna didn’t think it would be fair to herself to just let the dream of adventure go either. She had to think of that part of her life too.
What if I get there and he is just perfect? She had to wonder. He’ll probably want someone who wears dresses though. A woman who will look good on his arm. But she had to remind herself she was going to another world. She would no longer be around the higher society in North Carolina. This was the Wild West, the other side of the Earth for Deanna.
They might value that type of thing even more out there than. Her mind cried out. Her fears trying to work their way into her mind and dreams again. She tried to push them out again. Deanna would rather think of happy things for now. Let the other parts of her life burn down for now. Just focus on love, she smiled and began reading the romance once again.
In her mind she pictured her as the female in the story. It was something that made everything else in life simply goes away. Though she knew she wouldn’t be able to hide in this fantasy land forever, she could for a bit longer.
She didn’t want to lose herself to find love though. Deanna still wanted to be able to do things, to go explore in the woods. Though she knew there were dangerous animals in the woods in Arizona. Still she didn’t want to be trapped into living the rest of her life like the beginning of it. She had far too many things in life that she would love to see. Love could ruin that for her, if it took away that part of her life.
She wanted to stay focused enough to not let her mind fall in love and talk her into just accepting life as boring again. It has been far too boring for far too long, she cried out in her mind. I can’t just let anyone have my heart; they have to accept me for who I am.
Deanna began thinking about the more normal things in life as the train got closer to its final destination. Trying to keep her emotions at a minimum, so that she could control them. The last thing she wanted to do was go and fall in love too quickly.
Sure she had read about those so called things like love at first sight. But were they real? She couldn’t imagine it at all. It just didn’t seem possible to have something like that happen. She had tried to stop her emotions a long time ago in her life. That way the words her mother would say wouldn’t hurt her so much. There were times Deanna wondered if she would even know what being loved would feel like. How could she love someone, if she couldn’t even imagine that?
Her heart felt broken over and over again when she thought too long about being in love. She didn’t like to feel hope in her life again. For so many years she had hoped that her mother would accept her and love her for who she was. But it had never happened. Until her dying day her mother had told her that no one would ever love her.
Disappointment was something she had put herself through too many times as a young child. Each day she would wake up and hope that her life would change. That she could be complimented, maybe even hugged by her mother, or her father. They were both always touching each other, but they would look at Deanna as if she was a pest.
“Deanna, why couldn’t you have taken your looks after me? You look far too much like your father; no man will ever find you pretty.” Her mother had said once at the dining table when she was older. She had only been 15 at that time. But it had stung none the same. Her mother knew how to use her words well.
Deanna had found out just how much the tongue can truly cut its victim. Her mother’s words had wounded her many times. They still had a sting to them to this day even.
As Deanna had gotten older her mother had gotten meaner about what she would say to her. Deanna didn’t like to think about them though. She would much rather leave the words that hurt her back in Raleigh with her old life.
She really was trying to start a brand new life. Not only by doing new things in her life, but thinking new thoughts. She wanted to leave those negative things her mother had said to her many times in the past back there.
With thoughts of her mother the fears would always rear their ugly heads as well. She would feel how her heart would cringe in pain. Feel how it felt all those times in the past when her mother would say things. The words had gone on longer than the hitting had. Thankfully, her mother had stopped hitting her after one time Deanna had stopped her.
But there were more ways for her mother to hurt her. She had kept using those words and saying hurtful things to Deanna. Deanna almost wished she could have stopped the words, and still be getting the beatings.
“Tombstone Arizona coming up.”, she heard the conductor announce as he walked through the cart.
That seemed far too quickly, she thought. She stood up and faced her new life head on. Hoping for the best and fearing the worst. Deanna walked out of the train. She looked around and spotted a man who looked like he was waiting.
She studied him; he was a nice looking man. He looked very professional. He had black hair and a goatee. He was tall like he had said, 6’ 3” and wasn’t fat, but looked fit. He looked at her and she noticed his blue eyes.
Chapter 4
Aaron was waiting on the train when it pulled into town. He had hoped no emergencies would come up that he would have to attend too. It had been a slower day in Tombstone today, he had been lucky. He hoped that was a good sign for this relationship he was set to begin.
He watched her get off the train, and watched her. She was small, had to weigh barely 120 pounds he guessed. Her hair hung down around her shoulders; he liked it. Though he had expected her to come all gussied up like those ladies of society. Her hair up and every strand in place. He had to admit he enjoyed this look much better though.
She had a light in her brown eyes that showed something about her. He couldn’t quite put his finger on what it might be. She could be scared right now. He was sure the stories they heard back East from out here were shocking. He had come to learn to love this life though.
If there was one thing about Tombstone, it was never expect a normal day. He almost laughed at the comment. Because today had been just that a normal day. Well, all except that he was meeting his new wife right now.
“Hello Deanna?” He walked up to her and put his hand out.
She shook his hand and said, “Are you Aaron?”, she asked.
“Yes I am. How was your trip?”, he asked as he grabbed her trunk.
“It was a nice trip; it actually went by very quickly.”, she admitted to him.
“First time on the train?”
“Yes it was actually.”, she told him.
“Well I’m glad you made it safely.” He smiled at her.
He wanted to ask her how soon she would like to get married. But he didn’t want to seem too pushy either. He had been wowed by her ever since she got off the train. She held herself differently than he had expected too.
There was something about her that he couldn’t quite put his finger on right now. But he liked her a lot. She wasn’t a female one would call pretty, but more beautiful and handsome at the same time. She had a quality about her that made him want to know her better.
But there was also the part of him that wanted to enjoy her as a female should be enjoyed. His lustful thoughts came crashing to the surface. He wasn’t sure if more of him wanted to marry her so he could make love to her, or to get to know her better.
That beast inside of him was determined to work it’s way to the surface. If she was a lady of high society though, he knew that she would demand they be married before he could touch her. This was why he was so desperate to find a judge right now. However, he didn’t want to say it out loud to her.
He thought it might make him look like something less in her eyes. Aaron knew that women liked to be admired, but this wasn’t supposed to be just any woman. She’s supposed to be my wife. So I want
her to know I respect her as a person. He thought this was the best approach to use if he wanted them both to be happy in a marriage.
The fact was he didn’t just want sex from her. He really wanted to have someone to share his life with. Aaron had grown up with a sister and a brother. He had loved having other people around him his whole life. But he had come out here and left that all behind.
Now it was just him and he wasn’t used to that at all. His loneliness had won out in the end and he had caved in to the classifieds. That was better than going back home though, he thought. That life is over now; he wanted to focus on his new life now.
His mind was on her now and nothing else. He looked at her, she was beautiful to him. She had a feel about her that made him want to hold her. He felt his need to protect her kick in his mind.
“So when would you like to get married?”, he finally asked. He kicked himself in his mind. Why did you say it that way? You’re an idiot, he could hear. He felt at a loss for words around her, like he couldn’t think clearly.
She had stopped walking at his question. They stood there in the middle of the street.
“Maybe I can ask that again?” He looked at her and saw her nod her head in agreement.
“I would be honored if you would accept my hand in marriage. However, if you would like to get to know each other better first, that will be fine with me. Though not preferred. “, he said to her.
He saw the fear in her eyes for a moment. “Okay we don’t have to get married right away. I mean I wasn’t going to make you sign a contract or anything. I just meant why shouldn’t we live like husband and wife, if we know it was what we agreed upon.”, he explained.
“Yes that is true.”, she admitted. “I guess when you want to we can. I was just hoping to talk more first, get to know you better.”, she said shyly.
Aaron wasn’t sure what to think at that point. Part of him was disappointed that she said no, however there was another part that was relieved.
The Duke's Dilemma: Regency Romance Menage Short Stories Page 53
